she's not afraid of running wild

(Mary) Esther Shyrock, 19 years old. College freshman. "don’t call me beautiful, i don’t care, call me intelligent, tell me my laugh is contagious; that i made you smile, tell me i have something to offer"

[isaacbutler]

A hand came up to rest on his chest, fingers curling to clutch at the fabric there. The action was accompanied by a wounded expression a moment later as he took the extra step to stumble forward with his head bowed. “Ouch,” he shook his head, “you could have at least let me believe it for, like, a second, y’know.” Not that he hadn’t expected that exact reaction from her. Esther had informed him countless times that she wasn’t there to build his ego up, but to keep it in check instead. And while he didn’t really think he needed it all that much, his words being more of a joke usually than him being serious, he knew it was never meant cruelly and so it never affected him all that much. He was more likely to brush it off and keep going than to take it seriously. Which was why, a second after his little act the grin was back on his face and he continued towards her as if nothing had happened in the first place.

Isaac made the mistake of looking to the side to think back to his flight when she asked the question. So, when he felt hands that weren’t his grab onto the front of his shirt and jerk him forward, he released an undignified sound and ended up laughing into the kiss for a few seconds before he registered what was happening. His hands moved to cup her face, thumbs brushing against her cheeks. When he pulled back, he didn’t bother to wipe the grin off his face. “Missed you, too,” he meant it, but he kept his tone teasing despite that. “And, well,” shrugging, he continued on, “fine. Screaming kids, angry people taking out their issues on flight attendants, the usual.”

[maryshyrock]

Nonchalance was something Esther never mastered. She knew it was going to come back to bite her in the ass if she didn't learn how to kepe her cool most of the time, wanting to be a lawyer and all, but when it involved her feelings things became too complicated to handle. Especially her feelings when it came to the boy standing in front of her. Isaac laughing into the kiss brought a smile to Esther's own lips, one that was difficult to get rid of as they kissed, her fingers tugging slightly on the hair at the back of his neck. For the past fews months, Esther had started to associate Isaac with something familiar and comfortable. It made her heart lighter to be around him, in a way she didn't expect it to and a way she certainly didn't know how to deal with yet. Missed you, too. "Shush," Esther said, tapping a finger against Isaac's lips. "Or you gonna have me believing you were writing Mr. Isaac Shyrock on the back of your notebook during classes."

They weren't kissing anymore, but Esther didn't bother taking a step back. If the proximity bothered Isaac in any way, he was more than welcome to put some distance between them. If he wasn't going to do that, she was going to keep her arms wrapped around his neck, their mouths mere inches apart as she stared into his eyes. "Sounds like an average day at the Shyrock family to me," Esther shrugged. Her mother's massive family was complicated business and escaping to Sam's house rather than staying around for the mess those family meetings were going to be had always seemed like the better alternative. "Sam pulled a house husband and cleaned up a bedroom for us. Put new sheets and new towels and everything. I'm not entirely sure how Austin puts up with that, to be honest."

[austinrickards]

Austin wasn’t sure what he was expecting. At most, that she needed something that should have been in there with her already but wasn’t. What came out of her mouth, though, was far from that and so he really couldn’t be blamed for the fact that all he could do for a while was stand there, blinking. “What?” he asked rather intelligently when he finally came back to his senses. He shifted his weight, hand coming up to brush through his hair as if it would help him get his thoughts together faster. “Well,” the word came out as a sigh, “it’s not like they’re completely reliable. You’re going to have to go get an actual test done before you really know for sure.” Was that helpful? Probably not. But then, Austin’s never been known for how great he handles certain situations. It was why most people avoided him when they needed advice or help with something. “Just look,” he finally moved forward to lean against the doorframe while facing her, “it’s not like avoiding it will make it all disappear.”

[maryshyrock]

"I know," it wasn't the first and it probably wasn't going to be the last time Esther'd gone through a pregnancy scare. Shit happens when you go around sleeping with people and shit definitely happens when you go around sleeping with one person and being less careful than she usually was. Stopping with the pills felt like a great choice for her body, especially because her and Isaac were always careful when it came to using condoms, but she knew it wasn't impossible for her to be pregnant. "That's why I bought three and waited a bit longer." She'd been wondering for a few days already. "Just to make sure these tests were going to be as accurate as possible." Austin was right, though. Beating around the bush wasn't going to make the situation any easier, wasn't going to make the possible baby disappear. Esther owed to herself to do this without being scared, dealing with the consequences of her actions. She stood still for another minute, though, biting at her nails and staring at the bathroom wall before the girl gathered enough courage to check the tests. "Shit fuck," Esther screamed out those words, burying her face in her hands, shoulders sagging in relief. "They are negative. Fucking hell."

[austinrickards]

Despite his advisor’s urging to not accidentally burn himself out, he had signed up for a few summer classes in the hopes of graduating a semester or two early. He barely got through any of his homework that morning, only starting on it after Isaac and Sam left for the grocery store, before he heard Esther’s shout forced him to take a break from it all. Tossing his pen down on the stuff littered around him, he pushed himself up and made his way out of the piano room. “Help with what?” he shouted down the hallway, not caring that he could have waited until he was actually closer to where she was in the house before he did. Austin came to a stop in front of the bathroom door, sure that her shout had come from that room rather than somewhere else in the rather large house. “What do you need, babe?” He called out in a quieter voice from there, not wanting to enter just in case she didn’t actually want him inside with her for whatever reason.

[maryshyrock]

Her mother's voice was a constant in the back of her mind. Countless times she had been told to be careful, to remember what would happen if she wasn't - and Esther knew all of that. She'd slept with enough guys in her life to  know what she was supposed to do and she definitely wasn't, and it wasn't like her and Isaac hadn't done it enough times to know the procedure. Accidents happened, though, and it wouldn't be the first time. Her period had been late enough that she was truly worried for the first time in her life, and as much as she thought she could, she couldn't do this alone. When Austin appeared at the door, she was biting her nails and it took her a handful of seconds to let her hand drop. "I think I might be pregnant," Esther said, not wanting to beat around the bush. "So I took three pregnancy tests and I- I don't want to look, I can't look."

[isaacbutler]

Graduation passed uneventfully. The moment he was done with school he had packed his bags and gone back home, but he was already itching to get out of the state again. An entire summer stuck in Virginia was only going to drive him crazy. So, he was more than a little happy when Esther invited him out to Sam and Austin’s home a few weeks into the summer vacation. The cab ride from the airport was as uneventful as it always was, but as soon as his feet hit the driveway he found the excitement come back. “Esther!” He shouted with one hand raised over the roof of the cab while the rest of his body was still slouched over in the cab to grab his bag. Isaac pulled it over his shoulder, passed the right amount of money to the driver, and then slammed the door shut.

Isaac waited for the cab to drive away then began to make his way over to where she was sitting on the steps of the house. “Waiting on me?” he flashed her a smile, “Because you should know that’s a bad idea. Planes can’t be all that trustworthy when it comes to timing.”

[maryshyrock]

The cigarette was almost dropped when Esther saw the cab arriving. Pathetic, truly, how overly excited she was about this even thought it really hadn't been that long since the two of them had seen each other. She told herself to keep her cool, to remain nonchalant - but was there a point to it anymore? Part of what Esther was trying to teach herself was that she was allowed to feel things. And that apathy was only going to take her so far. Even Austin, with all his particular feelings on stuff and how detached he was to people in general, had let Sam in. The only thing keeping Esther from fully letting Isaac in was herself. And of course, the fear that the same wasn't in his intentions, but it wasn't like she could allow herself to keep using the fear of making a mistake as an excuse to not even try.

Esther stood up, stubbing the cigarette on the railing and pocketing the rest of it to throw away later. She crossed her arms over her chest, watching as Isaac walked up to her with a smirk on her face. "Actually, I was just taking a cigarette break and you so happened to arrive at the same time," she shrugged, brushing it off but keeping a teasing tone to her voice that made it clear that wasn't the truth at all. "How was your flight?" Before Isaac could give her an answer, though, Esther let out a sigh, unfolding her arms. She grabbed the front of his t-shirt and pulled him into a kiss, free arm going around his neck.

[maryshyrock]

Esther sat on the doorstep of Samuel’s house, smoking. It was an acquired habit, both from her cousin and college life. Summer couldn’t have come at a better time, considering she spent the last weeks of the semester surving off of cigarettes and energy drinks. The anxiety was back today ever since she woke up, knowing Isaac would be arriving in a few hours. She had offered to pick him up at the airport, but the boy had insisted on taking a cab, probably not wanting to be a nuisance or something in those lines. It hadn’t been so long since they last saw each other, only a couple of weeks since she drove down to visit him for a weekend, but it felt like a lifetime.

She was starting to believe it had been pointless to insist to Austin that she was trying to save herself and her feelings when they were far too transparent. Esther took another drag of the cigarette instead of dwelling on it.

[maryshyrock]

For days, Esther had been waiting for the right opportunity to do this. The girl knew it wasn’t an option for her to do it while Isaac was around. Or Samuel, for that matter. If the two lines appeared on the stick, she was bound for another breakdown and it’d be difficult to keep it from either of them before she could do something about it. With only Austin in the house, though, things were less complicated. Austin she knew she could trust, so she waited for when her cousin took Isaac out to buy groceries since he was the one more likely to comply to shut herself in the bathroom. Esther couldn’t wait for any of the three tests to give their results before she was opening the door. “Austin!” She didn’t want to do this alone. “Austin, I need your help with something real quick!” She yelled outside, hoping the man would listen to her.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Karev

Austin: Congrats, you caught me. That is indeed exactly why I said he could share. Just so he'd act like that.

Austin: Depends on who he's killing. There are a select few individuals that I would not like if they were killed. Besides, have you met me? I can stay mad at anyone. It's my hidden talent.

Austin: I've never really heard anything bad about your family, Esther. Well, except for what Sam's father did. So, if I based it off that, I really question how you turned out the way you did. Not that I don't approve of it, but I am curious.

Austin: So? My brother's my brother, doesn't mean he won't lecture me every chance he gets if he thinks I'm screwing up my life. I'd do the same for him and my sister too. It means we love each other. Care. You know, all the nasty things that come with being family.

Austin: Ha. Don't try to defend him to me. He broke Easter's heart. Then he broke yours. And hey, I'd be civil with him if you two wanted me to if that's all he did. But, it's not. So, nope. Don't care about how he may or may not be a well meaning misunderstood person with a heart of gold.

Austin: Everyone has history with this shit. I'd go into mine, but I don't want to. Life's about risk, Esther. You have to take some to get anywhere in life. Unless your goal is to single forever, then I suggest you suck it up and throw yourself out there again.

Austin: We're young and in love. It comes with the territory.

Esther: As if he actually needed a reason to act like that. You two are disgusting.

Esther: It's Sam. We both know Sam wouldn't kill someone unless he had a pretty darn good reason for it and if he did there's a 99% of chance you'd agree with it. I reckon a relationship doesn't work out if you two don't get mad at each other every once in a while.

Esther: My grandparents on my father side are rednecks. The type of idiots to vote for Trump and carry around a Confederate flag. My father doesn't agree with their shitty views so he was a rebel therefore his kids are both rebels. Not that deep.

Esther: Samuel won't let me lecture him when he's fucking things up so why the fuck is he allowed to lecture me? Because he's a man?

Esther: Yeah, well, I'm too much of a forgiving person I suppose. He's what keeps me from getting roofied at college parties so far, so I'm just not going to stress over it.

Esther: It's... frustrating. When all you do is fall and fall and fall and never being caught. It's. Painful.

Esther: Thought the honeymoon phase should be over by now.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Karev

Austin: Then why not just be romantic with me? Sam can share. Well, at the rate you're both going, I'm willing to place bets on the grim reaper being the one to make the first move. You're both going to be dead and my skeleton will shake it's head in disbelief at the both of you.

Austin: Nothing Sam does annoys me.

Austin: That's a lie. My ability to be annoyed is not immune to him, but it does take an awful lot for me to get that way with him. He can do whatever the fuck he wants. I'll do my part and everything will go back to normal tomorrow.

Austin: Yeah, and some of us have had more experience than most in that department. But I'm not blaming them so much as thanking them for this one. I mean, I love my attitude. Why would I blame them for it? Oh, please. It's Sam. He's your family and he loves you. He might act annoyed, but he only wants what's best for you.

Austin: Jesus. That asshole? That's what's keeping you from being in a relationship? Seriously? Now I'm judging you. Harshly. What the hell did that guy even have going for him anyway? He was a typical jock asshole. Yet, he had everyone wrapped around his finger at that school. He was as bad as that other prick.

Austin: I'm an in training surgeon. You called into question his ability to perform sexually. That's a medical problem. I'm just doing my due diligence as a future doctor here.

Esther: Ha, the idea that Sam isn't the possessive type is laughable. I've seen the not so subtle marks he leaves all over your neck. Oh, shut up, drama queen.

Esther: Let's be honest, you'd let Sam get away with murder. You love him too much to actually get mad at him for too long.

Esther: My family is the reason I'm this sunshine of a person as well, didn't you know? And if you're not going to be mad at yours for giving you that attitude, then I'm not going to be mad at mine either. Sam is my cousin, he's not my father.

Esther: I know you hate him, but he was... It's not about him. I have history with this shit, you know I do. I just don't want to have my heart broken again, is that too much to ask?

Esther: aka you two are horny bastards.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: just because you assume something is a lie doesn't mean it actually is! i wasn't lying to you!

Isaac: i'm thinking about taking a year off between schools.

Isaac: kidding. i'm going to college. but i'll probably stick to here. or go back down to georgia. so we still won't see much of each other.

Isaac: they do not ignore my existence. if they did that then they wouldn't bother giving me money and stopping by every so often. no. i was just saying.

Isaac: i feel like a life sized dildo right now. a blow up doll that actually works. ??????? are you sure ???? about that ????

Esther: sure.

Esther: don't even fucking joke about it.

Esther: that's okay we will deal.

Esther: what is it with you and Austin and making excuses for terrible parents?

Esther: if you were a dildo you'd be a very pretty one, think about that. I think I know him slightly better than you do, kiddo.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Karev

Austin: Didn't think you had to be romantic with anyone. Or, did that boy toy of yours finally decide to grow some balls?

Austin: More annoyed than snarky. You're not the only one that decided blowing up my phone with this nonsense was a good idea.

Austin: It's in my genes. You want to blame someone, blame my father. But I know you want because we both know you love me just the way I am ;) There's two sides of this story. What the hell did you do to annoy him anyway?

Austin: Trust me. He needs no help in that department, but I can always go test the theory again if you need further proof. I'll test it as many times as it takes. Because I'm a true scientist.

Esther: Never said I had to be romantic with anyone specifically. And who said he's going to be the one to do something first?

Esther: And let me guess, Samuel behaved like the perfect lap dog he is and acted like today was just another normal Sunday instead of trying to do something because he knew it'd annoy you.

Esther: Are we doing the blaming the family thing? Because trust me, we are all fucked up in that accord. When am I not doing something to annoy him? He said he's only going to talk to me when I stop behaving like a kid and stop using my relationship with Chris as an excuse to not do anything about Isaac.

Esther: You're not a true scientist, you're just horny.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: why are we making faces at all? i haven't done anything!

Isaac: none. but, you're the one always on my case about doing good in school. so. you should probably make sure i actually go.

Isaac: i've been there most of my life, actually. or have you forgotten who my parents are? that's rude, esther. you don't even know her. just what i've told you about her. maybe i'm lying.

Isaac: if that's all i'm good for, then why do you keep me around? i didn't say i was special. but the guy is like, ice cold. how the fuck did you people thaw him enough to befriend him?

Esther: you're lying to me! and I hate being lied to!

Esther: damn, that's true. I need you to do well, get proper grades, apply for college and get in.

Esther: I usually do my best to ignore your parents' existence, I reckon that's the same they do with you, so. are you lying? again?

Esther: entertainment reasons. I need someone to keep me entertained and you do a great job at it. he's not. he just has history and he acts like this because of circumstances. he has a good heart, though. he just follows his brain more.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Karev

Austin: How romantic.

Austin: If you really thought I gave a shit about this holiday, then why are you expecting me to text you back?

Austin: Scratch that. I do. So, I'm going back to ignoring my phone :) Handle your issues with your cousin on your own, babe.

Esther: Not you I have to be romantic with.

Esther: I knew you were going to be dying to make a snarky comment about me bringing up Valentine's Day therefore I'd get a reply anyway.

Esther: Why are you such a little shit? Give me a hand, he's being an asshole, telling me to grow up and stuff. I think he's getting cranky, it's probably the age, he's getting too old. Does his dick still work or does he need some help with that?

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Karev

Esther: Happy Valentine's Day!

Esther: when you're done sucking my cousin's dick can you tell him to call me and stop ignoring me?

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: :/ stop making faces at me. they don't work through text.

Isaac: well i'm all for it. but we've got to at least make it back to campus before my classes. so that i actually go.

Isaac: yeah but someone went off to college? idk what's up with that but she's not here anymore so i can't. hell no. you can when you're up here. i still have to live with her and i'd like to keep things civil. unless she doesn't then we're the people that pissed off the famous person.

Isaac: hey! i take great offense to that. i'm a fucking delight. no... but he should. i mean. we're stuck with each other a few weeks out of the year. doesn't that mean we should at least... talk?

Esther: well it's not like I can make actual faces at you right now so suck it up kiddo

Esther: where's the fun in that

Esther: adult responsibilities, you're going to get there eventually. please, girls like that are only going one way in life and that's down.

Esther: sure sure. you're great when your mouth is busy doing something else other than talking. it's Austin. he can ignore Sam if he's in the mood for it, what makes you think you're special?

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: i'm not lying! there's no reason to be mad here.

Isaac: yes. my answer to that is always yes. but if you don't think so we could always stop on the side of the road and i'll go down on you.

Isaac: not. i didn't even really like going in the first place. just gave me something to do y'know? she is. almost as bad as coach.

Isaac: well that's a bad idea to begin with seeing as i've never watched a single episode. fine but if he doesn't repay the favor then i'm sabotaging.

Esther: >:|

Esther: Well, I'm sure we can try out both, we'd have plenty of time for that.

Esther: If I was there you'd have me to do :( Tell her to get over herself. After high school she's going to go back to being irrelevant.

Esther: Why do I even bother with you? Please, do you expect Austin Rickards to be nice to you?

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: ???

Isaac: it wasn't actually. but now that you mention it. it has become both.

Isaac: what's my choice exactly? i would say that that was true but that ego... the main reason is because of our new captain she said she'd kick me off the squad if she smells alcohol on me at all. i don't really want to hear about that esther.

Isaac: is that how i'm going to get on austin's good side eventually? i help get him laid? so he's not as cranky? i can work with it but...

Esther: 'm mad you're lying to me.

Esther: Do you think you deserve road head, though?

Esther: Attending parties or not. Sounds like a bitch. And not my type of bitch.

Esther: I got on his good side by liking Grey's Anatomy, but I doubt he's going to allow you like that as well, so yeah. I guess you're going to have to help him get laid.

[maryshyrock]

Texts || Kiddo

Isaac: i'm not. to anyone. it's a high school kids dream to be home alone for an extended period of time with the key to the liquor cabinet.

Isaac: ok but why can't it be both?

Isaac: that's why i said what i did. they are not. i haven't been to a party all year so. yeah but you're you. austin won't go bat shit crazy on your ass like he would someone else if they interrupted his plans.

Esther: Sure.

Esther: I wouldn't be surprised if it was so I mean.

Esther: That's your choice. Parties aren't half as fun without me there as well so I don't blame you. Oh please, are you forgetting they have a daughter? Wild nights for them consist of when they sneak out to fuck in the car.

Esther: If anything Austin will be glad he has us to babysit Penny for one night while he and Sam go to a hotel room to fuck at peace.