μαθαίνω - to learn

{ phoebe - infp - biola ‘22 } living life page by page and trying to stay motivated more about me | nav | my stuff

[atlanxic-deactivated20250205]

sometimes you say or do bad things while you’re in an awful mental place. sometimes you say things that are rude or uncalled for or manipulative. and i’m not going to hold that against you. mental illness is hard, and no one is perfect. but once you’re through that episode, you need to take steps to make amends. you need to apologize.

“i couldn’t help it, i was having a bad episode” is a justification, not an apology.

“i’m so fucking sorry, i fucked up, i don’t deserve to live, i should stop talking to anyone ever, i should die” is a second breakdown and a guilt trip. it is not an apology.

when you apologize, the focus should be on the person you hurt. “i’m sorry. i did something that was hurtful to you. even if i was having a rough time, you didn’t deserve to hear that,” is a better apology. if it was a small thing, you can leave it at that.

if you caused significant distress to the other person, this is a good time to talk about how you can minimize damage in the future. and again, even if it is tempting to say you should self-isolate and/or die, that is not a helpful suggestion. it will result in the person you’re talking to trying to talk you out of doing that, which makes your guilt the focus of the conversation instead of their hurt.

you deserve friendship, and you deserve support. but a supportive friend is not an emotional punching bag, and mental illness does not absolve you of responsibility for your actions. what you say during a mental breakdown doesn’t define you. how you deal with the aftermath though, says a lot.

[nebet-ren]

This is the most carefully-nuanced discussion of this I think I have ever seen. Thank you for writing this.

[werelivingarts-deactivated20230]

time blocking method

Hi all, this is werelivingarts, a new post about time management method: TIME BLOCKING! Time blocking allows you to divide your day into big blocks and helps you to complete similar tasks in one-go without any interruptions! 

You can do your time blocking on:

Google Calendar (simple and easy to use)

Plan (drag your to-do list and organize them in blocks)

TickTick Premium (offer pomodoro timer)

Hope you find this helpful! ⭐️

[mathaino]

love these graphics, rly clearly explained! i think this is something I need to start doing bc I end up getting so distracted by replying to various texts/emails throughout the day

[inkskinned]

Actually life is beautiful because the sound I make while trying to breathe around hot food sounds like my dog trying to eat an apple. When I yawn my cat tries to put his face in my mouth like a little dentist man and when he yawns I put my finger in his obligate-carnivore trapzone and we both know he will not hurt me. When I do not fold my clothes, they do not hold it against me.

I am demonstrably sad, and lonely, and full of fear. But there are other people who will hold my hand, who will point out the hawk overhead, who will give you That Look in a public place. The other day at a coffee shop a child said "look! It's snowing!" so all of us strangers went to go look out the windows. It wasn't the first snow and it won't be the last but wasn't it lovely, like that?

How wonderful to live in a world where birds and frogs both say beep! How wonderful to have an ocean of beautiful sharks with their dinosaur teeth! How wonderful the moon and her changing face, how wonderful the bees and their dancing to communicate, how wonderful shrimp and their forbidden layers of vision! How wonderful, you, and what you will give the world! The way we love things enough to spend entire blogs devoted to them? How people will let me explain my Pokemon team to them? How we will both jump at the scare in the movie, how we laugh so loudly, how it feels to give someone your baking? How wonderful to be alive. I am sorry for forgetting.

This is the process of getting better. With wonderful people and wonderful strangers and wonderful friends: I am getting better, slowly. Thank you, whoever you are. In some way, you've been wonderful, and left a wonderful place in the world to ripple out to me. In some small way - isn't it beautiful - I promise, you've been helping.

[adarkerbeamoflight]

"How wonderful to be alive. I am sorry for forgetting."

[mereljournals]

“You’re a sudden afterthought that I keep between my fingers, like a wrecking distance that does not draw but lingers… and I’ll give no resistance.” - Merel Djamila 

[greylunar]

I made a quiz, its 36 questions, and y’all, I play-tested this, I got feedback, I hyper-analyzed, its good. I wasn’t like, I was gonna just let hogwarts houses die but apparently y’all be like,,, not knowing what a slytherin or hufflepuff is no shade and if all these quizzes are gonna ask you this question anyways: this is it. Idiot tested. Idiot approved

take it here! or copy paste if you need to https://uquiz.com/oz0xOu

[bunjywunjy]

I thought this was going to be another funney haha wizard quiz from those books you grew up reading but it reached into my torso and ripped out my spine

[selfcare-journey]

What to do when you’re having a poor executive function day/been sitting in front of your computer for a few hours wondering why you can’t do your work: 

1. Take a deep breath - Let out all that anxiety over the project you’re doing so you can think clearly

2. Pull up a clean sheet of paper and something to write with - You can use a fresh word doc, new page in your journal or planner or whatever else works for you, the idea is that after this you will have a physical list to look at to help keep you on task.

3. Identify your obstacles (i.e. What is keeping you from doing this task?) - For example: Is it scary? If so, why? Does it feel too hard? Is there something else that you feel needs to be done first? Write these down!

4. Plan how to overcome your obstacles - This can take some creativity and some thinking to best figure out how to overcome the obstacle. I’ve included examples below for potential plans.

Example 1:

Obstacle: I don’t know the best way to approach this task.

Plan: Brainstorm on paper ways that you might be able to approach this task. Google ways to accomplish this task. Review lecture notes or example homework problems on how to accomplish this task. Ask a friend/coworker/classmate how they might start the task. Write down everything you feel might be relevant until you feel like you know where to start and where to go.

Example 2:

Obstacle: This feels too big and overwhelming so I don’t want to do it.

Plan: Break down the tasks into smaller, tiny tasks. Make them as small as you need to make them feel manageable. Write down all these tasks check them off as you go. 

Example 3:

Obstacle: I’m waiting for someone to get back to me with comments on this project but they’re taking too long.

Plan: Follow up with this person and identify what you can do without their comments. For example, if you’re waiting for someone to sent you a section of a project or paper, write your section to the best of your ability. Can you have someone else review this project and still get good feedback. Or tell yourself you’ll revise/edit your project and integrate their comments later when you get to them. Often when I identify what feels out of order, I can move past it or put it farther down my list so I’m no longer just stuck waiting.

5. Encourage yourself and commend yourself for filling in the gaps actively that your brain couldn’t do on it’s own today. - You’re doing a great job!

Sincerely,

A Graduate Student with Adult ADHD

[smartspo]

in the past, i had to prepare for several exams by self-studying for long hours at home, so over the years i’ve learned the best ways to adapt to this situation, which i now present in this little infographic. i hope it can ease some of the pressure! 💜

studygram

[theradioghost]

when the times get rough and I lose sight of the goal i just. reread “the orange” by wendy cope again & remember. that’s where I’m going folks. sooner or later, whatever it takes.

[theradioghost]

At lunchtime I bought a huge orange— The size of it made us all laugh. I peeled it and shared it with Robert and Dave— They got quarters and I had a half.

And that orange, it made me so happy, As ordinary things often do Just lately. The shopping. A walk in the park. This is peace and contentment. It’s new.

The rest of the day was quite easy. I did all the jobs on my list And enjoyed them and had some time over. I love you. I’m glad I exist.

– “The Orange,” Wendy Cope

[coffeefuelledjournaler]

Confession: my habit tracker has the exact same layout as last month, because if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it 👌 Although I use my bujo as a sort-of art journal and love to illustrate it, it’s still a productivity tool at the end of the day- so I like to have layouts I can recreate quickly.

[untitled54184]

No matter how many times you fail to meet your own expectations, you have to forgive yourself. Despite contrary belief, dwelling on and badgering yourself over your faults doesn’t ever help you grow into who you want to be.

It’s like gardening: if your flower isn’t blossoming like you want it to, you don’t rip out its leaves as punishment for failing to satisfy you. You recognize the problem and figure out what’s going wrong with its environment so you can modify it, giving the flower a chance to bloom in its own time.

Accept your shortcoming or setback, forgive yourself, and figure out what’s going wrong so that you can plan for how to prevent it from repeating in the future. Thank your past self for trying in the first place and then give your future self the love needed to flourish.

[rainbowgazes-archive]

I love how the search function on this site is absolute garbage. I can look up a post word for word and I will NEVER find it

[simons-quest-deactivated2019091]

[strangerdarkerbetter]

Pro tip:

Wanna find a post?

Write out what you remember into a Google search.

After you write that out, end with site:tumblr.com

Google will search for your text on just tumblr

In my experience, it’s way more effective than searching through Tumblr

(you can use site:SITENAME.com to search any site btws)

[rainbowgazes-archive]

This usually works but for some reason a lot of posts get indexed on google from a person’s URL based on the posts that were recently reblogged on page 1, meaning that this is only a tiny bit more reliable.

[archivehead]

I HAVE a solution to this, you have to write down site:tumblr.com/post “ “

and then write a direct quote (could be a fraction of a sentence) into the quotations, I’ve been doing this for years, and it’s so useful, it works like 99% of the time 

(the more popular a post is the more likely you’ll find it)

[rainbowgazes-archive]

you’re a genius holy shit

[def-not-daria]

last week of september ✨

(got the kagehina sticker from picsart so all credit to the rightful owner!)

[yourbigsisnissi]

I don’t believe in trying to change the person you’re dating. You see them, as they are, and decide if what you’ve learned about them shows that you’re compatible. It’s why when I date a person, before getting into a relationship, i don’t give people a list of what I’m looking for. I don’t get into a relationship with a man who isn’t generous, and then try to make him generous. I don’t get into a relationship with a man with no ambition, and then get mad when he doesn’t get a job. I don’t get into a relationship with a guy who has relationships/friendships that make me uncomfortable, and then think when I get into a relationship with him he needs to cut off the people that make me feel uncomfortable.

If you date someone, see who they are, and realize hey aren’t what you want or need or deserve, I don’t believe in taking on the project of molding them into the ideal person for you. I believe in paying attention to who the person is, and severing ties when it’s clear this person isn’t for you. And to do that requires that you sharpen your spiritual discernment and that you trust yourself and your judgment to know who is and isn’t good for you.

[thoradvice]

flowers for those who need them:

🌸 you matter. even if you don’t think you’ve done anything of value, you have. you have value and worth. you always will. not when you get your shit together, not two years ago - always.

🌹 please take care of yourself. take your meds, drink some water, eat something. i know this is all over tumblr, but your body needs those things to function. eating and drinking and your meds will improve your mood and help you stay afloat.

🌼 be proud of yourself. you’ve made it so far! you’ve survived every bad day you’ve evr had. you’re so strong. you can do this. keep going. you’re a force to be reckoned with.

🌻 you’re beautiful. yes, you. don’t say “oh, this doesn’t apply to me.” because it does! you’re beautiful and don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.

🌷your friends do care about you. mental illnesses are just mean. they love you, even if your brain tells you different.

🌺 stay alive, please. ♡

[whicheverwarrior]

The first rule of writing is hoard notebooks

[raevenlywrites]

The second rule of writing is we do not write in our notebook hoard

[lauramkaye]

By the power vested in me by the Internet, I hereby grant you, the person reading this right now, official permission to write in your cool notebook right now, without waiting until you have something to write that is “good enough” for it.

Your notebooks want to be used. They want to contain your scribbles and doodles and brainstorms and shopping lists and bits of scenes that don’t work and bits of scenes that work great but not in the story you thought they were for and places where you crossed everything out and places where the words were flowing so fast you can hardly read your handwriting after.

Your notebooks are hungry. Feed them.

[holylantern]

28/11/17- long time no post- life has been hectic! trying a new style in my midori traveler’s notebook.

now playing - the louvre, lorde

[whenstudyblooms]

『01.03.19』

Wow, it’s the new year! First post of the new year featuring my traveler’s notebook! 🧳 I’m very thrilled to be using this new journal—I completed around 4 pages already. ✨ Can’t wait to be showing you more spreads in this notebook! ^^ 💖

「Quick tip: If you’re setting new year’s resolutions, make them realistic, not too huge, and concise to ensure that you can be motivated to attain your goals. 🎆」

❄️studygram❄️