Middle Class Problems

We all got problems.

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I've only been to six other countries. My life lacks cultural diversity. MCP.

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Bought a $130 pair of Birkenstocks on Zappos yesterday. Paid $7.00 for 3-day shipping so they'd arrive before my trip to Europe. Zappos surprised me with free overnight shipping. I wasted $7.00. MCP. 

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The tide took my Ray Ban Wayfarers the other day. Had to order a new pair for $350. Never going to the beach again. MCP. 

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Neighbor's gardener starts mowing lawn at 6 am. It's a Saturday. Upper-MCP. 

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Retainer in mouth. Can't speak. Sound like I have no friends. MCP. 

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My best friends just called me a hipster. I denied it. Denial is the first sign. MCP. 

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Order iced tea, expecting it to be unsweetened. So much sweetener in it that you swear you've just developed type II diabetes. MCP. 

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The latest episode of Glee was disappointing. MCP. 

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Went to get frozen yogurt. Forgot punch card. MCP. 

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New jeans dyed my legs blue. Can't go out dancing tonight. MCP. 

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AT&T Androids. MCP. 

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Sperry's keep coming untied. Keep having to stop and tie them. MCP. 

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Porta-Potties. MCP. 

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Cracked all my clarinet reeds. No more left in the box. Realize I bought regular Rico instead of Rico Royal. MCP. 

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Netflix in college. MCP. 

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I want to be green, it's just that the recycling bin is so far away and the trash is so incredibly convenient... MCP.

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Need to get XL sheets for college dorm bed. Can't find any above 250 thread count. MCP.