Meddling in the affairs of dragons

Canberran, hockey player, comic lover, book enthusiast, feminist and queer.

[high-quality-tiktoks]

Otters will forever be the most dramatic creatures on the planet🦦

[insomnia-productions]

[a-rude-elven-mage]

[garbage-empress]

time smells bad.

[chrome--horse]

what Synesthetic bullcrap is this now

[garbage-empress]

Listen

I accidentally leave the milk out overnight.

Milk smells bad the next day.

Why does milk smell bad?

Time gets in it.

[garbage-empress]

@ryanthecynic

[larckla]

Just realised this implies that a fridge cancels or slows time down

[garbage-empress]

As a simple experiment I will put some plutonium in my refrigerator and see if it decays slower, brb

[garbage-empress]

The results are in!

I have radiation poisoning!

[lastvalyrian]

this time it’s the opposite of Greek philosophy because you used the scientific method

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Conclusion: the scientific method gives people radiation poisoning

[chipper-smol]

just a fuckin big bird

[alivehouse]

that post about negotiation with hoas by threatening to set up a ham radio tower bc the fcc would back you up will not work at all even slightly but i will say that the blood feud between hoas and ham radio ppl is real & eternal. like if you want to get around hoa rules a ham radio person will probably have ideas

[alivehouse]

once again thinking about this guys "birdhouse" bc his hoa banned antennas but not "birdhouses"

[chickencourtesan]

One time I was helping a ham radio guy with his email and mentioned how I wanted to get into ham radio, but couldn't because I lived in an apartment. That guy immediately rattled off like, five different ways I could set up a radio antenna inside my apartment, and seven different ways I could hide/disguise the antenna and still get a decent radio signal. Ham radio enthusiasts are a hybrid between boy scouts and wizards and I love them they play an important role in our ecosystem

[aangarchy]

I like to think Zuko was never told by anyone how Aang ended up still being a child and not 100yr old man, so he just sorta starts figuring it out by the bits and pieces of info he gets from Aang and the rest like

Aang: y'know what the hardest part of being born 100 years ago is?

Zuko, who just woke up after getting an arrow bonked against his head, seeing Aang is clearly twelve: ?????

~

Aang: this is what monk gyatso always taught me

Zuko, having done extensive research on the air nomads, knowing this is impossible bc Gyatso died in the temple raids: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck wh-

~

Sokka: yea and then Aang entered the spirit world for the very first time trying to save me

Zuko, who up until this point thought Aang time traveled through the spirit world somehow: .......... interesting.

~

Actress Katara: it looks like someone stuck in an iceberg!

Actor Sokka: but who? Who is the boy in the iceberg?

Zuko, after only half paying attention: IT WAS AN ICEBERG???????

[chaotic-archaeologist]

You Can Now Explore All of ‘The Book of Kells’ for Free Online

Zoom in on every page of this legendary illuminated manuscript.

BOOK OF KELLS BOOK OF KELLS BOOK OF KELLS BOOK OF KELLS

[modmad]

[beautifulmon]

san ✶ take me home (220423) cr.

[detectivehole]

emperor kuzco was clearly gay

[detectivehole]

hes 19, with unlimited power, and he ain’t got a gf. the only time we see him interact with any women his own age is when he’s rejecting like 7 of them rapid fire. he pretends to date pacha in a gag that lasts like 10 solid minutes. listen to me god damnit

[qqueenofhades]

Okay, but just in case anyone is coming to tumblr dot com for my hot takes on 20+ year old kids' movies: Kuzco super WAS gay (or at least coded as such) and of course, I didn't get it until I watched it as a gay grownup.

He is played obviously camp and dramatic, for a start, and there is the aforementioned "hate your hair/not likely/yikes yikes yikes/let me guess you have a great personality" summary dismissal of all his potential brides. Then he spends dinner asking Yzma about Kronk ("so he seems nice? He's what, in his late twenties?") and otherwise being slightly obsessed with him.

Then there is the whole Adventure of Doom with Pacha, him being ever huffy about the Kiss of Life, and then the restaurant gag where Kuzco takes to playing Pacha's fake wife and dressing up in ladies' clothing with great gusto (reinforced by the waitress' "bless you for coming out in public" remark when Pacha says they're on their honeymoon). Then when he is finally de-llamafied, we don't see him paired off with the obligatory girl from the lineup earlier, as might otherwise be expected in a Disney movie. Instead he is still single, but goes to found family it up with Pacha, Chica, Kronk, etc, which dare we remark is a very queer trope.

In short, I have no idea how a Disney movie with no white people (all the characters are Indigenous/people of color), a gay king, cross-dressing jokes, and the most offbeat plot of all time actually ever got made (can you imagine the Family Friendly Mouse doing that today? Let us also talk about Kronk because he is a brilliant deconstruction of both toxic masculinity and the musclebound henchman stereotype.) Other than that this was the Chaos Hour of animated movies in the late 90s/early 2000s, and yes.

So yes. There you have it. I will not be taking criticism at this time.

[flavinbagel]

In response to the question “How did a movie like this get made at all much less by fucking Disney?” there was a recent Vulture article that outlines the whole shit show of a history behind this film according to everyone (writers, directors, VAs, Stings) involved. The gist of the story is that they fucked up making a whole, true-to-form Disney musical that never came to see the light of day SO BADLY that Disney switched directors, locked the writer’s room, and didn’t review a single script until weeks after the film was in theaters.

Please, read this article if you have some time. This story is wild, and involves directors being pitted against each other Bake-Off style and a shockingly intimate documentary created by the wife of Sting who, himself was heartbroken by the decimation of the songs he wrote for the film including cutting a fantastic Yzma villain song sung by Eartha Kitt that is SO DAMN GOOD but would not ever have fit the more nailed-down Yzma we would eventually come to know and love. It’s so catchy though, I’m doubling up on calls to action but please listen now:

[theterriblethingabouttulio]

holy shit read the article. it’s worth it and completely batshit

[kat-witha-k]

This is fucking insane

[brightlotusmoon]

[mod2amaryllis]

I've never adequately appreciated the batshit brilliance of this joke, I've taken it for granted

[menlove-archive]

honest to god can’t stop thinking about this song about jeff bezos by philip labes (link takes you to his spotify). it’s such a good example of politically driven folk music.

[kaizykat]

Lyrics:

Jeff found a genie in a bottle Who said, “I can give you anything you ask” “You can have your wishes three And a million more for free It’s unlimited, just set me to the task.”

Well, Jeff thought a while, Said, “I want houses, “I want boats, I want fancy modern art, I want tickets to the Met, I want my own private jet, And a rocket into space just for a start.”

Well, the genie waved her arms and made it happen His every wish bolted from the blue And folks all over town grew enamored, gathered ‘round To admire the man whose wishes had come true

They said, “Let’s hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he’s been set so far apart.” “Yeah, let’s hear it for Jeff who has everything! ‘Cause his wishes are only at the start.”

Well, Jeff heard their shouts and he grew worried He said, “Everybody’s getting in my way.” The genie smiled as before, “You’ve got a million wishes more. You can even give a bunch of them away.”

Well, Jeff got confused and sorta quiet ‘Til he finally said, “I have just one wish more.” “I am satisfied, so I wish that you would die So you cannot grant wishes anymore.”

Well, the genie’s eyes got big and sad and shiny ‘Til she finally said, “Your wish is my command.” And with an effervescent sigh, she disappeared before his eyes And no wishes were ever granted there again

So, let’s hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he has set so far apart Yeah, let’s hear it for Jeff, who’s got everything! Every single fucking thing except a heart

[wordsmithic]

[djarin]

#it’s a hard knock life

MAKE ME CHOOSE -> @matthew-lillard asked DIN DJARIN or LUKE SKYWALKER

[dankmemeuniversity]

[gae-bolg-alternative-dot-exe]

When I reject canon it’s cool and respectable. When you reject canon it’s wrong and stupid. It’s quite simple to understand that really.

[lilydvoratrelundar]

[professionalowl]

[id: a painting of Henry VIII with a speech bubble above his head. /end id]

[jjongho]

meanwhile jongho is a whole kang yeosang encyclopedia 

[holy-yeosang]

Yeosang x VOGUE April 2022

[mylittleredgirl]

i love how there's the genre of fix-it fic where the author goes into great granular detail of how our heroes manage to avoid or undo whatever character death or other unpopular choice occurred, in a way that abides by the laws of the fictional universe and definitely required a substantial plot outline, and then there are fix-it fics where the author just went "that's bullshit and didn't happen," and we as readers all go "agreed. carry on."

[factfiend]

Fun fact: According to Greek legend there was a famous prostitute who managed to avoid a death sentence by showing the judges her boobs and arguing that it would be a crime against the Gods to destroy something so beautiful. 

Before you ask, yes there are paintings of this. And yes, they’re amazing.

Read more.

[karlosmadera-deactivated2019022]

I love history.

[bipolarbulgogi]

Role models tho.

[blackwoolncrown]

[barcoque]

The gay one

[suzie-guru]

No, but this is one of my absolute favorite bits of history! 

The courtesan named was named Phryne and she was indeed a renowned beauty, and was indeed was put on trial for a capital crime. And yes, the sum of her defense consisted of her stripping in court (helped by her lover/defendant) and asking the jury (all males) if they were prepared to destroy this. 

But this is actually a very interesting case of Values Dissonance - the capital crime she was accused of was blasphemy. In Ancient Greek society, exceptional beauty was a sign of favor from the gods, and they took the idea that beauty indicated goodness with great seriousness. They even called their nobles Kaloi k'Agathoi, “the Beautiful and the Good.” 

So by showing off her great physical beauty, Phryne was being very clever indeed, her argument essentially being “How could I possibly commit blasphemy if the gods have given me this body?“ 

God, I adore history. 

[nationalshitpostingagency]

”If these tits are legit, you must acquit.”

[guerrillatech]

[simariethehawk]

and hilariously that is not why it is called that.

It is the circle of the bears cause of ursa major and ursa minor, and the circle without bears cause ya'know opposite part of the sky.

We lucked right into that one....

[nerdfighterwhatevernumbers]

#so what you’re saying is#the stars dictate whether bears do or do not exist in places

[team-bear-arms-deactivated20220]

Astrology is real but only for predicting where bears will be

[the-tired-tenor]

Bears do not travel to places they cannot see their gods