MEGAFISHBEIN

A conglomeration of thoughts, ponderings, tangents and free-associations pulled screaming from the depths of a psyche yet to be understood.

[megafishbein]

Hustle Harder, Die Sooner: How to get shit done AND love the life you live

"I'll sleep when I'm dead!"

For those of you who just read that and thought "Hell yea, get that money! HUSTLE FO' LIFE! GRIND OR DIE!"

Fuck off my blog. Leave now.

I'm sorry (deep breath). I do in fact hope you stay and read because it is you (you 12-hour-day, self-employed, workaholic you) who is precisely the individual that stands to benefit most from this post...and downloading the supporting checklist.

If I'm heated in my verbiage, and passionate in my messaging it is simply because that guy was me more recently than I care to admit. I had an epiphany though. I realized I might just get my wish sooner than I thought: I'd sleep soon for I would indeed be dead soon. I was "poundin' the pavement", "puttin' on the elbow grease", "burning the candle at both ends".

I felt reassured though, as influencers the likes of Gary Vaynerchuck and Grant Cardone preached "hustle harder!" and "Don't outsmart, OUTWORK!". For a while I couldn't seem to find any self-made entrepreneur that would admit they took vacations, slept more than a couple hours a night, or even watched a bit o' Netflix every once and again. Furthermore, these folks were positively adamant that they loved their lives! That they had no regrets missing family functions or kid's recitals and ballgames! I was skeptical, but I was also naive and gullible so down the rabbit hole I went.

I felt like a shuttle during reentry, bits of my hull ripping off and disintegrating as I hurtled towards my goal. I prayed that enough of me would remain intact so that when I finally reached my destination I'd be whole enough to enjoy my success.

But the further I went, the more I became convinced I would not be so lucky. At this rate I wouldn't reach my destination at all.

Then seemingly out of nowhere Arianna Huffington resurfaced in my life with a blasphemic perspective:

Lean back a bit, get good sleep, recharge...repeat.

Wow! Mind blowing! Well, it was for me at that time in my life. And not a minute too soon either! If I'd allowed myself another week at my then current pace, you might be reading nothing right now, and reading nothing sucks ;-)

I've come to believe the body, mind, and soul to be nothing more than machines. Yes, beautiful machines capable of great creation and massive output, but machines nonetheless. And as with any machine they suffer from lack of maintenance and neglect.

We productivity junkies and workaholics are perhaps defined by a heightened tolerance of stressors and heavy workloads, as Arianna personally attests. We seek this stuff out, we love challenge, and we take great pride in accomplishment. But we still have a limit, a “production capacity” if you will. Those that know their limit and capacity have only discovered it on the back end of a burnout

And those that don’t? Well, they’ll find out soon enough...

That is, unless we begin to institute some simple daily practices of mental oil changes and soul-battery recharging. These are the tips my checklist holds. The solution I offer is not only the continuation of your precious productive life but also happiness, stresslessness, and comfort.

Your turn:

Are you a hustler? Are you a chill mo-fo? Do you try to combine the two like Arianna? Would love to hear your thoughts on the matter. I will never presume to have "figured it all out", and I always learn best from conversation and healthy debate. Feel free to spark the chat-fire below!

Also, I'd be remiss to not offer you "MegaFishbein's Mental Maintenance Checklist for Workaholics" after this rant of a blog entry. Just look for this picture in the sidebar to claim your copy:

[megafishbein]

Big Fishbein, Small Pond - The Law of Averages & The Key to Happiness

Most folks are possessed by one of two fears:

#1 - "I'm not doing enough, not dreaming big enough. I'm lazy and will never really achieve the thing in life that will truly fulfill."

#2 - "I'm too ambitious, I dream too big. I'm afraid that my eyes are always so focused on the future milestones I'm missing out on the joys of the present...and upon my death bed I'll realize in horror the life I could've lived.

I am unfortunately afflicted with both.

Mayhaps not so unfortunate...but before I spoil the ending, allow me to begin at the beginning.

Small Fish, Big Pond Phase

When I was but a boy I played lots of sports. I liked to play sports with my friends. My friends were all much bigger than I, but I held my own and worked hard to be a valuable player. Though I established worth, I never shone. In soccer I played a mean "D", but I still played "D". In baseball (being the quick little fuck I was) I batted first, was told to land a safe single, and played a reliable centerfield role. I was never trusted with the responsibility of a pitcher or felt the spring-loaded action at short-stop.

Oh how I craved these things. I dreamed and aspired and sought and bled and sweat...but alas, those roles were locked down securely by the bigger older friends.

At least in that pond they were...

In little league sports, at a certain age (I forget which exactly) there is a tier transition from "minors" to "majors" of sorts. This applied to my soccer and my baseball leagues. There would be a try-out where certain kids would move up while others would stay back.

I cannot recall the precise thought process I underwent, but I didn't try out.

I chose to stay behind.

Big Fish, Small Pond Phase

BOY WHAT A REVOLUTION! The next soccer season saw me lead my team in goals as a starting striker with a devastating (sometimes suicidal) header. Much the same with baseball. I alternated positions from a spry short-stop, digging out nasty skips with grace, to closing pitcher boasting a change-up that had 'em swingin' whole seconds before the ball passed the plate...and...I batted 4th, the most coveted and prestigious position in a batting lineup, cleaning up loaded bases on many an occasion to great fanfare.

I had arrived.

...or more accurately, my more challenging and skilled competitors had departed...

I was torn. It was uncomfortably obvious that I had only been allowed the limelight due to my conscious choice to downsize my pond thereby becoming relatively the bigger fish. Only recently have I begun to ask myself why this was. I won't indulge in any further anecdotes, but this "choice-become-tendency" had leaked far past childhood sports into my academics, my career, relationships...my everywhere. I had become enthralled by reputation, recognition, and most importantly by winning.

The Self-Doubt Phase

The nagging mind was with me. The dialogue thread sounded something like this:

Am I really that afraid of measuring up? I thought I was a confident guy, perhaps even too much so! Am I shortchanging myself by limiting my exposure to challenges? Am I really that dependent on the attention that comes from winning and being the best? What has become of the humble student I thought I was? Surely he must still live somewhere in me! How can I channel him again?

Now that's the question isn't it...

How do I channel a teachable mindset with a heart that beats for competition?

The Law of Averages & The Key to Happiness

The answer was simple, far more simple than I wanted. And like most lessons it lived hidden in my past experience. There were in fact two causes of the shining results from the pond-changings. I already outlined the first; I moved to the realm of the less skilled. But I cannot discount the power of being surrounded by and training alongside those who were far more skilled than I. It is no new truth that we get better faster when we are the worst in the crowd.

"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." - Jim Rohn 

This quote is my gospel. It is simple and its truth lies in my experience. However, I haven't come all the way full-circle and I'm not necessarily preaching that one should seek to be the worst. Why? Because it sucks, that's why! It's demoralizing, debilitating, and in my opinion emotionally harmful over a sustained period of time...

...and because an ambitious soul on the bottom of the totem pole has their sights forever fixed on the next rung (do totem poles have rungs?) making them a prime candidate for death-bed-regrets.

I hope you've enjoyed story time, but now it's time for reflection. Trust I have not lost sight of the original point. Remember the two fears I was caught between? Fear of taking the lazy way out vs. fear of the future-tripped joy-blind life? This is the basis to my new goal of becoming a perfect person #3 in Jim's group of 5. I want to think big, but live grounded in the moment. I want to concoct complicated strategies for tomorrow, but feel joy and find gratitude in the accomplishments of today.

I feel I have found the edge where the worlds of ambitious and the grateful meet, and ironically it's in the middle. It is in being "Dude #3". Here I will learn, but I will also teach. I will die a happy man with a full life lived and exactly no regrets.

[megafishbein]

Ascertain if you are in the presence of Heimlich-maneuver-familiar folks, then bite off more than you can chew. Choke without fear.

John Hopkins

[megafishbein]

Passion is Foolish: Pursue it Anyway

"She'll sob for hours staring at the wall. Nothing I say helps."

I happened to overhear this as I sat outside of El Cortez in Brooklyn last week preparing for a night of Karaoke with an old friend. There were two guys, perhaps late 20's early 30's, having a conversation. They were just drunk enough to be perfectly articulate yet entirely oblivious to my being within earshot.

The Boyfriend: "She got a badass degree doing some sort of high-risk-youth social work, but as soon as she finished and found out what the jobs in her field really looked like she totally abandoned it."

The Friend: "Man, that sucks...another one chewed up and spat out."

The Boyfriend: "Yea...she's still bartending, and she likes it and all, but every once in awhile she'll get hit with these waves of hopelessness that she's never gonna do anything with her life. Some of the other bartenders have been there for like 10 years, "lifers" y'know, and she's absolutely terrified that she'll wind up like these people...waking up at 4:00p.m., working nights, partying on the job...forever. Plus it totally sucks for her, cuz these people are her friends, but she hates them in some weird way for showing her what her life might look like if she doesn't figure it out.

The Friend: "At least she makes good money though right? I mean, she could totally take some more classes during the day and keep lookin' for her thing."

The Boyfriend: "I suggested that. The thing is, she's $50k in debt with student loans, and the thought of going back to school only to have what happened before happen again is just too much. She's already locked into the bartending gig because of the money she makes and the loan payments and whatnot. She feels like it would only trap her more...and honestly I totally agree...the system's fucked man.

The Friend: "Yea, I getchya...what about some sort of side-hustle? Didn't she do some jewelry shit on Etsy a while back?"

The Boyfriend: "Totally! Get this man: She had this one friend that worked there that had been making her own hot-sauce...y'know...just for herself and for friends. But she took it pretty seriously, honing her recipe, bottling it herself and doing label art 'n all that. Last year she happened to be at a barbeque with some friends who had a band staying with them. These guys weren't big time or nothing, but they loved the shit out of her hot-sauce! Long story short, they had some buddy back home in Portland who owned a pizza place..."Sizzle Pie"...dunno if you've had it...but the place is something of an underground-culty-staple there. They took some bottles back home with them and BOOM...licensing, production and distribution deal out of nowhere!"

The Friend: "NO WAY! That's amazing! How lucky...

The Boyfriend: "Well, yes and no...and this is what I've been trying to tell her. By her own account her friend worked her ass off, maybe she never thought it would lead to where it led, but she still bled and sweat into "her thing". No doubt there was a lucky break in meeting the band dudes, but if she hadn't already put all that time into it nothing would have happened. And chances are, if the dudes never came along, something else would've. Her sauce is obviously more than just "pretty good" or it wouldn't have been picked up by the joint in the first place, so it goes to reason that being as good as it is, it would've been appreciated by some big wig somewhere eventually. I guess my point is that hard work creates luck...or at least if you work hard enough for long enough the probability of luck gets greater and greater."

The Friend: "I can see that. So what now? Is she gonna start a hot sauce line?"

The Boyfriend: "....maybe...I sure hope so (laughs). The tough thing for her now is comparing her results to this cinderella story. Every idea she has she follows up with '...but there's no way it'll turn into that.' or 'there's no way I'll have those results.' And I totally get it...It's damn near impossible not to have some sort of expectation on whatever you build, but when it keeps you from starting...that's the real problem."

The Friend: "Totally paralyzing huh? Damn...Well shit, I wish her the best of luck. Gotta just start I guess. And isn't she just wanting something that gives her life purpose anyway? Purpose doesn't have to be defined as financial success, even though I guess money coming in could validate your purpose to some extent. But yea! If she could find something she cares about then the end result wouldn't matter right? At least not as much? Sounds like she's much closer than she thinks actually...

The Boyfriend: "Hmmm...I guess you're right. She definitely cares enough about not having purpose...that's probably the most motivating factor you could ever ask for. Damn...the despair she has NOW might just be the missing link she never had before! So long as it motivates and stops being paralyzing like you said.

The Friend: "Totally!"

Freddy Mercury: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

The Boyfriend: "Shit! I'm up! Come on, I'm singing Bohemian Rhapsody...watch me make a fool out of myself doing something I care about with no expectations of success."

[megafishbein]

An Ounce of Pre-Production is Worth a Pound of Post

Creative marketing and advertising is sometimes a catch 22. We artists scream for freedom, for pure and unconstrained parameters of creation, yet, we are notoriously lazy, disorganized, and distractible. We clamor that rigid guidelines and fixed turnaround times poison our creative processes...but somewhere deep inside we worry that if truly left to our own devices we’d never get anything done.

These ideas are false. My experience does not show that planning kills spontaneity. It does not indicate a correlation between a firm deadline and a sacrifice of creativity.

An ounce of pre-production is worth a pound of post.

My dear friend happened to be in Vegas this week at NAB and sent me a hilarious picture. It was a shot of a mug with the slogan “Keep calm, and we’ll fix it in post.” For those of you who aren’t steeped in the film production fantasy world that I live in, this idea “we’ll fix it in post” is a snide jab that is frequently used by on-set production crew members to express the attitude: “Fuck it. Let’s cut this huge corner now and make the video editor fix it later.”

It’s definitely a light hearted joke more often than not, but dear lord let me tell you...the times when it’s NOT are the bane of my existence. And for the inexperienced filmmaker, what may appear to be a mere “cuttable corner” may in fact kill the production if not considered and addressed during pre-production or on set.

Though this vignette is closely tied to a film production, I’ll can broaden the application of this lesson with another anecdote.

What we can learn from Michelangelo

When Michelangelo was preparing to carve the marble that would become his David, he is fabled to have said this:

“I knew he was in there, and I pondered the block for days until I saw him. All of him. Then I simply removed everything that was not David.”

I do not know a single soul who would dare brand Michelangelo as a “planner”, but there he was, refusing to chip a single flake of stone before his vision, all of it, was fully and comprehensively imagined.

Stephen Covey and Michelangelo were cut from the same cloth. Their mutual preachings/practice of “beginning with the end in mind” stitches them together. A simple proposition right? But when launching into a project, how often do we really do this? How consistent are our actions with our belief that this is a practical approach?

...even I, the video editor, fall far short often…

I do consider myself lucky however. I may not learn from my own mistakes easily, but on a daily basis I stand face to face with sharp and clear examples of what not beginning with the end in mind looks like. I see the shots that should have been thought through, I see the logo that was designed without a brand strategy...I reflect in clear third-person hindsight on all the paralyzing problems that could've, nay SHOULD’VE, been prevented in pre-prod.

...and I heave a sigh as I fix them in post…

I propose a two-fold solution:

Begin with the End in Mind! Take that ounce of time to plan your project. It won't kill your creativity. The looming deadline may indeed require some corner somewhere to be cut, but trust me, the up front strategy stage is NOT where to trim the fat.

Perform a Post Mortem! Take another ounce of time and reflect on the process, if only to ask yourself, “Does this resemble the end I had in mind?” Download the details, scrutinize your weaknesses and shortcomings, and take pride in your triumphs. Most importantly, consider how to better your vision for the intention phase of that next project.

Masters are not born masterful. They are merely the disciplined few that take that vital time for intention and reflection. They hone their creative skills, yes, but their primary purpose is the perfection of their process. With this attitude you cannot fail, because failure begets insight...and insight is improvement.

Take the time.

[megafishbein]

"My neck" is two words

Mark Twain

[megafishbein]

My neck is a regular thing

Galaxy Saeed

[megafishbein]

Tools for Fools - Real Productivity Doesn't Live in an App

"If only there was a way to ensure with perfect certainty that I should never forget an important task..." I once wondered.

"Pick me!" - Asana, Trello, BaseCamp, Evernote, and all their cousins hollered back in harmony.

So I did. Sometimes individually, sometimes in combination, I sought and used their systems many times to great effect...but never to perfect certainty of non-forgettal.

I've known for quite some time that I am not alone in my hunger for productivity perfection. There are thousands of us out there, honing our processes, always on the look-out for the fabled productivity tool that ratchets tight the last bolt, finally locking our thrusters to the shuttle. 

But that day will never come.

"Even the best of tools are useless in unskilled hands"

There is no process of noting or compiling tasks that does not (or will ever find a way to not) account for the variable of human fallibility. Be it an app, a journal, a calendar, a to-do list, NOTHING will read your mind from surface to depth and include all action items of importance for you.

Not even A.I.

No doubt artificial intelligence will be a fantastic tool upon its commercial release, but it will still be a tool...and we will still be the fools operating it.

I will see your saying and raise you another:

"Even the simplest of tools are devastating in the hands of a master"

So, what really makes one a master of productivity? Well, quite simple they get shit done regardless of the caliber of tool they use. But we already knew that...The real question is how do they manage to accomplish so much?

I'm sorry for throwing so many quotes into this piece, but they seem to be stitching my thoughts together quite succinctly, so here's another:

"The best system is the one you USE!"

Blah blah blah, you already knew that too right? Then why are you still reading? This blog's sole purpose is to provide new insight into productivity, which is fancy-talk for ANOTHER GODDAMN PRODUCTIVITY TOOL!

Mmmm, but the plot thickens; I myself also know "the best system is the one I use". For me, writing about productivity is my way of deconstructing and debriefing on new tools, tactics and hacks that I'm always finding...because I'm still looking too...ugh.

So why am I still writing?

I write and you read because at some level we still think the magic hack is out there. Because we're all fools. But hang with me, there may be a silver-lining in our foolishness and insatiable curiosity after all.

A brief baby-book tangent:

Studies unanimously show that soon-to-be-parents who read pregnancy and early childhood development books prove to be better parents than those who don't. The authors and publishers eat these stats alive and cite them whenever possible, slapping quotes all over the dust-covers: "Pregnancy books make better parents." Period. Case closed.

...Not so fast.

At some point someone had the notion that this was not a causal relationship between reading and parenting, it was a correlational relationship. In other words, it wasn't that the books made the readers better parents, parenting was already of high importance to these people...and people who place importance on pregnancy are just the type to read books on it.

And so it is with us. Our mere curiosity towards productivity predisposes us for productivity masterhood. Our systems are our pregnancy books, and our crafts are our kids. The only difference is that we can delay the birth of our children if we don't put down the goddamn books and stop searching for app that hacks "to perfect certainty". Their deadline is firm; when the kid comes, they put their system into action.

And so it must be with us.

Or there will be no one to pay for our nursing homes ;-)

[megafishbein]

Tools for Fools - Real Productivity Doesn't Live in an App

"If only there was a way to ensure with perfect certainty that I should never forget an important task..." I once wondered.

"Pick me!" - Asana, Trello, BaseCamp, Evernote, and all their cousins hollered back in harmony.

So I did. Sometimes individually, sometimes in combination, I sought and used their systems many times to great effect...but never to perfect certainty of non-forgettal.

I've known for quite some time that I am not alone in my hunger for productivity perfection. There are thousands of us out there, honing our processes, always on the look-out for the fabled productivity tool that ratchets tight the last bolt, finally locking our thrusters to the shuttle. 

But that day will never come.

"Even the best of tools are useless in unskilled hands"

There is no process of noting or compiling tasks that does not (or will ever find a way to not) account for the variable of human fallibility. Be it an app, a journal, a calendar, a to-do list, NOTHING will read your mind from surface to depth and include all action items of importance for you.

Not even A.I.

No doubt artificial intelligence will be a fantastic tool upon its commercial release, but it will still be a tool...and we will still be the fools operating it.

I will see your saying and raise you another:

"Even the simplest of tools are devastating in the hands of a master"

So, what really makes one a master of productivity? Well, quite simple they get shit done. But we already knew that...The real question is how do they manage to accomplish so much?

I'm sorry for throwing so many quotes into this piece, but they seems to be stitching my thoughts together for me quite succinctly, so here's another:

"The best system is the one you USE!"

Blah blah blah, you already knew that too right? Then why are you still reading? This blog's sole purpose is to provide new insight into productivity, which is fancy-talk for ANOTHER GODDAMN PRODUCTIVITY TOOL!

Mmmm, but the plot thickens; I also know "the best system is the one I use". For me, writing about productivity is my way of deconstructing and debriefing on new tools and tactics and hacks that I'm always finding...because I'm still looking too...ugh.

So why am I still writing?

I write and you read because at some level we still think the magic hack is out there. Because we're all fools. But hang with me, there may be a silver-lining in our foolishness and insatiable curiosity after all.

Bear with me on a brief tangent:

Studies unanimously show that soon-to-be-parents who read pregnancy and early childhood development books prove to be better parents than those who don't. The authors and publishers eat these stats alive and cite them whenever possible, slapping quotes all over the dust-covers: "Pregnancy books make better parents." Period.

Case closed?

Not so fast.

At some point someone had the notion that this was not a causal relationship between reading and parenting, it was a correlational relationship. In other words, it wasn't that the books made the readers better parents, parenting was already of high importance to these people SO they read the books.

And so it is with us. Our mere curiosity towards productivity predisposes us for productivity masterhood. Our systems are our pregnancy books, and our crafts are our kids. The only difference is that we can delay the birth of our children if we don't put down the goddamn books and stop searching for app that hacks "to perfect certainty". Their deadline is firm, and when the kid comes, they put their system into action.

And so it must be with us.

Or there will be no one to pay for our nursing homes ;-)

[megafishbein]

The past happened recently

Shakespeare

[megafishbein]

An Influenced Existence: The Evolution of Self-Examination

Every once in awhile I am aware of reaching a milestone as it occurs rather than in hindsight. And during these happenstances, I tend to heavily reflect on my life and my evolution.

I realize that most often I write in a vague manner, even when telling personal anecdotes. Today I'll be a bit more specific. Today I celebrate 8 years off heroin.

And that's really all I'll say about that. This was the milestone, and this was the catalyst of my reflecting. And although I'm grateful beyond words to no longer suffer at the hands of the great beast, I couldn't help but be objective about what the drug had done for me; how every drop of experience had twisted my outlook just a scoach...and come to realize, many times for the better.

Sometimes I think I'm a mere composite of my experiences, a "passenger" of circumstance of sorts. I wonder, "How much of who I am has been formed without any discerning input on my part? How 'in control' of my personality am I?" Understand this is never a morbid or woe-is-me thought, just simply an observation which I find most fascinating.

I look to my childhood, and my parents, and early schooling and dissect the lessons I was taught, purposefully or otherwise. In the moment, I was almost never aware that I was learning and absorbing, but in recent years, having practiced and practiced self-examination, I can easily tease out the influences from my early life: study habits, morals, religious and political views.

Even as I got older, I was still heavily influenced by my environment. I didn't do a lot of picking and choosing of beliefs-that-fit-best, I would try all of them on for size...and rarely return the wardrobe. This was mainly due to my ignorance that I was even being influenced, but also because everything interested me! I just loved being exposed to new things, and my naivete kept me from understanding that beliefs could be harmful...and ignorance could be fatal.

So, on I trudged down the romantic road of reckless ritual.

I guess you could say drug culture excited me, and I was too young yet to truly grasp my mortality...so on I went with the dangerous experiment. I drew no lines in sand, I never said never, and before I knew it I had swallowed bait and tackle being quickly reeled in by the almighty fisherman.

If I could describe to you a default mechanism that I have identified in my own character, it would look very much like a nearsighted horse with blinders. I never knew to look back, examine and learn from past mistakes, and I could not exercise even the slightest degree of foresight to avoid even the most obvious of consequences.

"But what of the good influence? Didn't you say it was't all bad? "

Yes, dear reader, I did indeed make mention. Here are two axioms that should help illustrate:

"We do not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it"

"Discard promptly and without regret"

These thoughts describe the process in which I, today, reflect and analyze. They are my new default mechanisms. I am still, as I believe most humans are, a product of my environment and heavily influenced by others. But, I do not adopt and blindly march forth as I did in my early life. I analyze my character, even when staring really objectionable aspects dead in the face. I do not shy from discovering uncomfortable things about myself, and if I decide the belief or outlook or habit doesn't serve me any longer, I "discard promptly and without regret".

This is not nearly as easy as it sounds. Most of the really glaring stuff are life-skills I've had for many years, and I still enjoy using them. Things like sleaze, greed, selfishness, lies, lust, etc. These skills have served me. I have enjoyed them quite a bit. But once the veil is lifted I cannot go on pretending. Hard as it may be, I purge them.

Pain brought me here. That is the good. "They great motivator" they say it is, and I wholeheartedly agree. This discomfort pushes me to reflect and remove, continually chipping away at the negative and making room for more goodness.

Eight years of this practice has brought me to heights of ease and comfort I never thought possible. 

Here's to nine.

[megafishbein]

Gutting the Golden Goose: Lessons from the Backend of Burn-Out

In case you're not familiar, the story goes like this:

There was a farmer, had a goose.

One day the goose laid an egg of pure gold.

He sold it for many monies.

The same lay the next day, and many more monies.

The farmer became impatient and tried to inspire more frequent layings.

He was not successful.

So, he reasonably figured, he'd gutt the goose and get all the eggs at once.

He was not successful.

The goose was dead...

...and no more eggs.

The lesson?

Patience, and the necessity of nurturing that which winneth bread.

I'm sure this being as old an allegory as it is, I cannot give sole credit to Stephen Covey. However, I must tap him as the source of this lesson's weight for me. I can't tell you the first time I heard the story, but I can say I was blind to the message until only recently. And its weight was a direct result of my cyclical and painful experience behaving exactly like the farmer. I'm a professional goose-gutter, and I have suffered much.

Let me explain the lesson a bit clearer with some personal examples: 

Covey likes to use the terminology "P" and "PC", for "production" and "production capacity". As a freelancer working in a field that excites me, doing things I find fun, I find it incredibly easy to overwork myself. I will get wrapped up in a project and literally time-travel. One one hand I am bow-down-groveling-grateful to be blessing with such interest for my craft, but on the other I'm pimp-powder-slapped by the un-sustainability of this kind of work habit.

I would love nothing more than to work and work and work, but my body gives and my brain fries at a certain point...and beginning again after I have pushed into this realm is a nearly impossible task. During these marathon-sprints I frequently forget to eat, I do not exercise, I don't socialize and I get very little sleep. From the outside looking in it is quite obvious I'm headed for burn-out, but strangely I myself cannot see the edge of the cliff, and I'm free-falling before I know what happened.

I don't perform the oil change and the engine blows.

So, back to the moral:

I used the oxymoronic term "marathon-sprint" quite purposefully. One is not meant to sprint a marathon. Ironically, the first marathon ever, ran by Pheidippides during the battle of ...(wait for it)... "Marathon", was sprinted. But upon his arrival to Athens, Pheidippides had barely enough strength to deliver news of the Greek victory, "Joy! We win!", before dropping dead where he stood. 

We honor you Pheidippides, the original goose-gutter!

It took exactly one instance for the rest of us to decide sprinting marathons might not be the best course to take. Why on earth can we passionate freelancers not learn from our own suffering? Why must we repeat this process time and again, sprinting and dropping, killing our money making mallards?

I cannot answer the "why", nor do I find the "why" to be of much importance. What is important is that we take time to rest and rejuvenate; to perform the scheduled maintenance of our brains and bodies in order to preserve our capacity to produce.

We may be tempted to push and rush and drive our levels of production to new heights, but let us remember, the engine will explode. And when it does, the time taken to rebuild the engine and re-motivate is worlds greater than the effort to plug along "at a medium pace".

Your body, brain and business will thank you.

[megafishbein]

Gutting the Golden Goose: Lessons from the Backend of Burn-Out

In case you're not familiar, the story goes like this:

There was a farmer, had a goose.

One day the goose laid an egg of pure gold.

He sold it for many monies.

The same lay the next day, and many more monies.

The farmer became impatient and tried to inspire more frequent layings.

He was not successful.

So, he reasonably figured, he'd gutt the goose and get all the eggs at once.

He was not successful.

The goose was dead...

...and no more eggs.

The lesson?

Patience, and the necessity of nurturing that which winneth bread.

I'm sure this being as old an allegory as it is, I cannot give sole credit to Stephen Covey. However, I must tap him as the source of this lesson's weight for me. I can't tell you the first time I heard the story, but I can say I was blind to the message until only recently. And its weight was a direct result of my cyclical and painful experience behaving exactly like the farmer. I'm a professional goose-gutter, and I have suffered much.

Let me explain the lesson a bit clearer with some personal examples: 

Covey likes to use the terminology "P" and "PC", for "production" and "production capacity". As a freelancer working in a field that excites me, doing things I find fun, I find it incredibly easy to overwork myself. I will get wrapped up in a project and literally time-travel. One one hand I am bow-down-groveling-grateful to be blessing with such interest for my craft, but on the other I'm pimp-powder-slapped by the un-sustainability of this kind of work habit.

I would love nothing more than to work and work and work, but my body gives and my brain fries at a certain point...and beginning again after I have pushed into this realm is a nearly impossible task. During these marathon-sprints I frequently forget to eat, I do not exercise, I don't socialize and I get very little sleep. From the outside looking in it is quite obvious I'm headed for burn-out, but strangely I myself cannot see the edge of the cliff, and I'm free-falling before I know what happened.

I don't perform the oil change and the engine blows.

So, back to the moral:

I used the oxymoronic term "marathon-sprint" quite purposefully. One is not meant to sprint a marathon. Ironically, the first marathon ever, ran by Pheidippides during the battle of ...(wait for it)... "Marathon", was sprinted. But upon his arrival to Athens, Pheidippides had barely enough strength to deliver news of the Greek victory, "Joy! We win!", before dropping dead where he stood. 

We honor you Pheidippides, the original goose-gutter!

It took exactly one instance for the rest of us to decide sprinting marathons might not be the best course to take. Why on earth can we passionate freelancers not learn from our own suffering? Why must we repeat this process time and again, sprinting and dropping, killing our money making mallards?

I cannot answer the "why", nor do I find the "why" to be of much importance. What is important is that we take time to rest and rejuvenate; to perform the scheduled maintenance of our brains and bodies in order to preserve our capacity to produce.

We may be tempted to push and rush and drive our levels of production to new heights, but let us remember, the engine will explode. And when it does, the time taken to rebuild the engine and re-motivate is worlds greater than the effort to plug along "at a medium pace".

Your body, brain and business will thank you.

[megafishbein]

The Art of Shifting Gears

Rude Awakening noun Def: "A sudden and often unwelcome realization."

I can think of no better way to blanket my day-to-day experience: I am constantly riddled with rude awakenings.

I am the kind of person that frequently gets lost in work. Hours fly happily by without notice. I am also the kind of person that positively loathes distraction, but can't seems to be completely and consistently rid of it.

Being a freelance creative, the irony couldn't be thicker. This seems to be the employment type of choice for the pathologically workaholic and attention deficit. We are people famous for conceptualization and notorious for incompletion.

Hence the rudeness of my awakenings. I love my business, but my business needs more than just love to thrive; it needs order. For it to maintain order means that I frequently have to change direction at a moment's notice, which means I am pulled kicking and screaming out of my work and forced to switch gears. "Put on a different hat, and put out a different fire"...seems as good a mantra as any eh?

So, what have I learned from this sharp and recurring pain? Just with any other pain related problem, the quicker I stop whining and perform the shift the better. The truth is that this shift will probably always feel rude, but that's just it! It's the shifting itself that feels weird, I have no qualms with being businessy, or financial, or orderly. It's just the right-brain to left-brain jump itself that begets the strangeness and the discomfort.

So, my solution:

Bite the bullet. Decide to bite it quicker than yesterday. Strive that tomorrow you'll bite it even faster than today. Do not expect this shift to EVER feel normal, do not even hope for this. Instead realize this is a process to be streamlined, not a process to be enjoyed.

[megafishbein]

5 Reasons to FREAK OUT About Your Beliefs

It is no new truth that we are all easily caged by our belief systems. Our subconscious feeds us directives on a moment-to-moment basis and even the best of us find ourselves on the other end of a crisis with clear hindsight wondering "...what the fuck was I thinking?"

One of the wonderful things about having no employer is that there is one less influence tugging at my lower brain (another post on this later). However, one less influence means one less excuse: One less reason for not "choosing" your beliefs and cementing them into habit through repeated action. 

Just a bit of a disclaimer: I will never write on a topic that I do not have bitter experience with. Rest assured, I have FREAKED OUT about my belief systems on more occasions than I care to admit. Here are 5 reasons you should too if you happen to relate to a place in my life where I did.

1. Becoming self-aware...and realizing you haven't been your whole life.

It is an unfortunate but necessary first step to become aware that the beliefs you thought you had you whole life - decent and honorable beliefs mind you - are nothing but nice little sleep-aides. Beliefs are not BELIEFS if one's actions don't reflect the ideal. And a shock it is to realize that you've been acting contrary to closely held ideals for years. For instance, thinking of myself as an assertive and courageous person, but failing to stand up to a cutter-in-line and opting to silently boil with rage instead...

2. You don't actually like the beliefs you practice.

I moved to Portland, OR about 9 months back and was beyond thrilled to be in a city that was so eco friendly and outdoorsy. I thought to myself "How wonderful to be in a place where EVERYBODY LIKES WHAT I LIKE!!!" (I think in all caps from time to time). But check it out, if I'm totally and completely honest with myself, I'm a shitty Urbanite through and through. I'll go on hikes and take trips to the coast and whatnot...but (here goes it)....I don't actually like any of it.

3. All of your beliefs are someone else's.

Goodness gracious! I can't even fit that pill in my mouth let alone swallow! (insert joke) This ties back to the original self awareness, but the despair goes a bit deeper. Personally, the floor gave way for me on this one. And again, I couldn't tell you when I adopted them it had been so long. I feared for my individuality. "Who the hell am I then?!" If none of my beliefs are my own...doesn't that make me a mere composite of my environment? A walking mirror or sponge or parrot?

4. The epiphany after the wreckage of 1, 2, & 3 (first good reason to freak)

"NO! I'm not a walking mirror-parrot-sponge!"

It was only after the dust settled did I notice that I did indeed have some fundamental, un-influenced, non-composited ideals of my own. And thank Jeeves for the painful collapse, because otherwise it's very likely I would've lived my life according to someone else's "handbook on life". I hate to use the phoenix metaphor, but honestly I had to die a painful and embarrassing death to rise again. And with the settled dust came a nearly blank slate.

5. Realizing you can make 'em up as you go along!

Seriously, how programmed was I? Isn't this how beliefs are supposed to be formed? From one's own experience?! Alas, I was...but now I'm not, and I won't dwell on the past. The truth (and again, far from new) is that we as intelligent beings have much more choice in the matter than our environment would let on. The big choice, as Stephen Covey enjoys pointing out, is to be reactive or proactive. And it IS a choice! Comforting news indeed, but we don't get off the hook that easy. There's a lot of tear-down and re-build left for us all.

The big takeaway I want you all to...take away...is this:

One cannot be truly happy in ignorance. I know this from experience. One cannot be truly happy as a fraud. I know the from experience. One cannot be truly happy someone else's life. I know this from experience.

I don't claim to know what truly creates happiness, but I figure a process of elimination is as good a place to start as any. 

Let me know in the comments if YOU'VE figured it out ;-)

[megafishbein]

Bro, do you even utilize leverage?

Archimedes

[megafishbein]

Enslaved Under the Lash of Client Approval

The last video I produced blew my total view record out of the water.

I was particularly pleased when I submitted the final edit for approval, but my hope was equally matched with the doubt and fear that all we creative freelancers know too well.

"What if they don't like it..."

This short thought riddles our existence. If the hammer comes down with a "...this is not exactly what we had in mind..." a fog of apathy rolls in and settles down. It can corrode our confidence, it can cause the cutting of corners, and completely kill our creativity if we're not careful.

All alliteration aside, it's a tough thing to hear however nicely put, but let's not forget, it is the burden we agreed to bear. We signed up for this career knowing full well we're thin skinned and suffering from creator's bias. But self-knowledge avails us nothing. It doesn't make the pain any less sharp or enable us to deal with rejection any better.

At least in the beginning.

Before we start solving this problem, let's look at the flip side:

"OMG! They f***ing love my sh*t! I'm the sh*t at this sh*t!!!

What a high. My creation has excited and influenced and has been met with widespread appeal. As I mentioned at the start, I'm  coming at this post with my most recent experience being a mind-blowy super-success. And lord almighty does it feel good!

What's interesting to me is that I've chosen this occasion for the analysis of acceptance vs. rejection. It is typically during these emotional highs that I forget all the past pains. I see through the rose-colored-lens and I don't think about it again until the next rejection.

But here we are. 

I won't assume but I'll chance that if you've read this far, and are planning on reading further that you, like myself, still suffer from at least some of what I've described. The big question that we all hope to answer is this:

"Are these manic highs and crippling lows the way creative life is supposed to be? Will it be this way forever? Say it ain't so!"

It ain't

BUT! It requires a hefty load of self-searching and continued awareness to place ourselves in a position where our happiness and comfort isn't dictated by the praise and acceptance of others. I'm not just talking clients here either. This problem is prevalent in the personal lives of every single one of us. Perhaps the glare of our work dealings has kept us from noticing the personal leakage, but it is there all the same.

There are two schools of thought when it comes to overcoming rejection:

Toughen Your Hide: Try and experience as much rejection as possible and you will no doubt place less and less of your wellbeing on each outcome as time progresses.

Disassociate Action from Outcome: Focus your fulfillment on the process itself, the act of creating, rather than whether or not it is well received.

I propose a combination of the two.

As far as #1 goes, I've written plenty on the fruits that many rejections/failures bear. The is much to be said about the building of humility and the realization (upon rejection/failure) that "you are not made of glass". When I fail and the world doesn't end it becomes much easier to risk again, to love again, to create again.

And for #2, we pursued creative careers because we loved to create, not because needed acceptance. We love making so much that we put ourselves in harmful positions involving potential rejection. We believe so fiercely that we endure massive amounts of torture JUST SO WE CAN CONTINUE CREATING. So let us just be a smidge more aware why we're doing it. That alone can revolutionize our comfort and tolerance.

So, the solution combo cocktail:

Know there will be rejection. One each occurrence welcome it with open arms, and recognize your emotional durability. Know that you have control over only two things: your process and your outlook. You cannot control the outcome and the opinions of others, and investing in them is like placing your life savings on a coin toss. Remember why you do this, keeping this firmly in mind when nobody likes your product.

I'm not perfect at this myself, and this post is equally for me as much as it is for you. But I am absolutely convinced this is the answer. The answer not only to emotional durability and breaking the chains of this approval bondage, but to growth and success as well. I do my best work when I'm not burning up energy concerned with the outcome. It was in this way I approached the film that broke my record, and I am pleased with the results thus far.

I will continue experimenting.