Melon_414 @melon414 - Tumblr Blog

you are NOT immune to cunty little detective. at some point in your life your brain will be taken over by a fictional detective and there’s nothing you can do about it. it WILL happen to you. you might even end up transgender about it

kleefkruid

My dad was dealing with some mixed feelings so I told him "In therapy when something is too complicated to do a simple 'pro and contra list' we sometimes do an excercise where you imagine all these mixed feelings around a table in some kind of conference, letting each tell their bit and you leading the debate."

and my dad didn't really respond and just stared ahead so I kept preparing lunch. Until a few minutes later when he suddenly piped up: "I am having a bad time at the conference"

humandisastersquad

kinsey-the-saiyan-deactivated20

I too am having a bad time at the conference

sensiblereblogifposts

Reblog if you too are having a bad time at the conference

For anyone curious, the Sherlock / Hozier song lyric idea is still happening, I'm just a bit busy with life at the moment and I haven't had the motivation to do so.

#bbc sherlock #hozier

I'm thinking of making a series of BBC Sherlock posts but with Hozier song quotes. I saw one earlier and I now want to find at least one example for every song.

It will likely take me a while, but I'll likely do at least one to see how I feel about it before I get completely started.

I want to know if anyone else likes this idea and/or would be interested in sending me specific quotes from Hozier songs they'd like to see.

#sherlock holmes #bbc sherlock #john watson #hozier

applepixls

just had an absolutely brilliant idea.

imagine a trans woman (who doesn’t know shes a woman yet) goes to sherlock and is like “hey [insert crime stuff] i found this” and shows him a sticky note with like a grocery list or whatever on it and he goes “a woman’s hand writing” and she goes “no” and he goes on his schpeil about how womens’ handwriting is very distinctive and she’s like “no cause i wrote it” and he’s like “well of course you wrote it” and she’s like “but im not a woman” and he’s like “oh… sorry, spoiler alert. guess you havent gotten there yet…”

melon414

Can I steal this and write this but for a trans man as I have experience in that area?

sarasapen

guys serious debate over here

Who would win in a twerk-off, oiled up: BBC Sherlock or John

My boyfriend says Watson because

- he’s a military man

- he knows how to use his body

- he’s been trained

- his actor is caked up

- he’s got more to work with

I said Sherlock because no duh it’s Sherlock??

Who do you think would win? Give reasons!

melon414

Sherlock

1000% Sherlock

HAVE YOU SEEN HIS SLUTY ASS WAIST?

Just watch the 'Vatican Cameos' scene in A Scandal in Belgravia. You'll understand

That being said, I also think Sherlock because I don't believe John would be as comfortable twerking, he'd think too much and it wouldn't work. Sherlock doesn't really give a fuck what most people think and, if properly encouraged, would absolutely go all out. Remember how he said he loves dancing in The Sign of Three? That man can absolutely twerk and I will not believe what anyone else says.

#sherlock holmes #bbc sherlock #john watson

grim-reaper-offical

FUCK YOUR TUNNELS, FUCK YOUR CARS, FUCK YOUR ROCKETS, FUCK YOUR CARS AGAIN

milknbrookies

My current hyperfixation

melon414

OMG this is great

#sherlock holmes #bbc sherlock #jim moriarty #madagascar #Marty

the-blahaj

fun shark facts

jk rowling is a little crybaby bitch

safedistancefrombeingsmart

Aaaah, I missed making gifs. 😇

#john watson #sherlock holmes #bbc sherlock

illdiealonelyguy

I sure do love my genius drug addicts.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #sherlock holmes #bbc sherlock #dr house #house md

sidneypagget

I heard we were doing blorbos at pride so I had to sneak in with my offering at the last minute before we all turn straight again at midnight :(

#sherlock bbc #sherlock holmes #john watson

the protected species thing won’t work. ive seen that meme before. admittedly it was funny, actually top humour, but nothing can stop a search warrant. if you transplant grown protective species, therell be obvious signs of dirt disturbance; also adult plants don’t transplant well. if you use seeds or transplant seedlings, they wouldn’t be able to sufficiently cover the site for a looooooooog time.

That is a good point. I have definitely thought about that as well. I was thinking more along the lines of saplings for protected tree species as it is illegal to disturb or remove them where I live. Even for law enforcement, as certain trees are endangered and we want to protect them for the generations to come.

Another option would be to bury a body near kudzu, as it is insanely fast growing. It's called "The plant that ate the south" in the United States. However the issue with the dirt disturbance would still be there unless you went into a kudzu patch to bury a body, which wouldn't be very pleasant.

I wouldn't suggest burying a body as it is much more suspicious. It's much easier to feed a body to pigs, as they'll eat everything, bones included. However, if you want to bury a body, that's your choice.

artofdeductionbysholmes

what is the best place to stab someone without causing any ruptures in the organs if I want to sell those organs? And what should I do with the body(bodies)? I've heard 3 feet deep is adequate since there are oxygen there and bacteria can work on decomposing the corpse much faster than at 6 feet (correct me if I'm wrong)

Oh, I'd get into all sorts of trouble if I answered that. Mostly with John. And George. Maybe even Mycroft.

@johnhwatsonblog @cigarette-cases @atamh

johnhwatsonblog

I am proud of you.

Of course, they don’t know that you don’t have such a filter offline.

melon414

I fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you see it) know most of the answers to these questions.

1) It depends on if you know how to properly harvest those organs or have a organ harvest team on standby, as blood loss can be detrimental if you plan to sell them for use in another person. I'd recommend trying to stab the femoral artery as it's far enough away from any major organs. However I am not a doctor so please take that with a grain on salt.

2) 3 feet is generally ideal, you are correct. However it can also depend on the environment, you don't want a heavy rain to wash away the earth to reveal a body. As for how to cover any potential corpses I do know the answer for this quite well. Plant some sort of protected species over the body as it is illegal to remove protected species and they will likely help to decompose said body. If that doesn't work, you could always call in a tip about a body (not where one really is) so the police dig there first. Then go back and bury the body in the freshly dug soil. It will be less suspicious for the ground to be disturbed and the police are much less likely to search there again.

I don't condone killing anyone nor do I think it is wise to do so, I just know how to get away with it should I ever need to.

P.S. An air bubble injected into the bloodstream from under the tongue won't be caught on a tox screen, however it is not always fatal and if it is, it will cause cardiac arrest, making the heart unusable. Do with that as you will.