Hullo!

Hi

[haverdoodles]

Martyr

— (Varric & Hawke)

.

“Where’s Hawke?”

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I am not legally responsible for any emotional damage that these three panels may cause :)

[makingdonalddrumpfagain]

[girljeremystrong]

why is this so funny

[ladychlo]

@mattxiv

[naturalkillercyborg]

[donnamissal]

[parasect]

Thanks, tumblr mobile, for unintentionally making this even funnier

[po-acus]

Just as I said, “is this ever going to load?” One gif loaded and honestly it answered my question perfectly.

[sternenhimmel-mond]

Together they create the full set.

[bartziefluff]

saw this again on my dash after reblog and…

[tuntematonkorppi]

tumblr black out poetry

[tommysparker]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[posts-from-a-weirder-timeline]

Reblog this to make a transphobe instantly have a heart attack and die <3

[egalitarianchica]

It’s so rare seeing memes that praise men and boys so here are two nice ones.

[angel-eyes-2006]

Reblog if men are pretty and valid to you

[jasntodds]

I’m living

[magistrate-of-mediocrity]

It’s like the direct opposite of this

[xeduo]

[zachsilberberg]

enemies

[supersoftly]

he looks like he’s experiencing whip cream 

[titaniumlegman]

What?

[supersoftly]

[savannahfaerie]

here’s another

[tumblunni]

The most confusing group chat

[theroguetoast]

Cat and skeleton are the people in the gc watching a couple friends argue

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

tumblr is special because I can make someone unhappy just by writing down my thoughts & then they'll thank me and ask me for more

[sagetheunwise]

How dare you be right about this. Please continue

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

due to plaque buildup, human arteries are sometimes crunchy. also, the arteries themselves are made of a smooth, elastic (possibly gummy?) type of tissue.

therefore, I imagine that eating a diseased human artery would be a similar experience, texture-wise, to slurping one of THESE babies

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[lastedapple3]

I just want you to know, gaud, that the Tumblr notification that brought me to this post said, verbatim:

You won't know love until you see this biggest-gaudiest-patronuses post.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and I bet you now feel a deep yearning love for 60 seconds ago, back when you hadn't encountered this post ❤️

[melgillman]

Here’s HSTHETE, the 24 hour comic I drew this year!  Thanks to everybody who followed along on twitter this weekend as I posted these pages <3

[amingethia]

I only ever saw the first page and didn’t realize there was a whole story until today. This is my new favourite comic.

Its got everything, a Goddess legend, a goat Goddess, an escaped betrothal, a lesbian relationship, a higher being x mortal.

[niggazinmoscow]

Important

[onsighthoe]

“Not in courtroom 502”

[theliesofrello]

The equivalent of not in this damn house

[that-twink-over-there]

“Try it… Try it”

[theintrovertnation]

OUR INSTAGRAM

[love-is-pain-by-bri]

This ❤️

[nayal8tr]

FACTS ✨ daily poster right here

[corndog-patrol]

the whole fam as tiny animals <3

[transmechanicus]

A lab coat is a type of lingerie

[kittykat5090]

op what does this mean

[transmechanicus]

It means i’m breaching lab etiquette and OSHA regulations by the dozen by looking mad cute next to the chlorine laser.

[osha-official]

"Mad cute" you say? Okay, I'll allow it just this one time

[writing-prompt-s]

A dating service where matching is based on people’s search history exists. You’re a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer.

[endreams-s]

Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it?

Writer: Air shot between the toes, it’ll look like a heart attack.

Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok

[honeypressed]

Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts

Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes

Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks

[moonreflectioninthefragglepond]

A++ addition

[tetsuskitten]

Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they’re writing* babe, i’m not sure if this would actually work?

Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you’re doing great

[tigerliliesandcherryblossoms]

I LOVE THIS

[vmohlere]

Oh no, murder comedy is my jam

[laziestofthedreamers]

I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It’d be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gullible, and on top of it they’re a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it’s completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work.

Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it’s a big hit. Enough so that a detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there’s something to the theory, but it’s all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author’s home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don’t seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that’s it. Most they do is leave for groceries.

So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he’ll FINALLY have proof.

[pamgkrthwrites]

Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. 

“You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer.”

Serial killer breaths in. “Look-”

[ladyhavilliard]

…perfect

[outerspacekake]

I don’t like actual murder mysteries, but this is perfect

[yourpotatotwiceremooved]

THE ORIGINAL POST HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY

[hypochondriac-butters]

reblog this if you are gay, constantly tired, or a cryptic entity that merely inhabits a human form