The Hot Sheets

oy, it's me, frank! the mib never made me a full agent, but bein' an informant still has its perks. if you need some dirt, or you wanna sniff the dirty laundry, i'm your remoolian.

[mibgossip]

You can take me out any day, Frank. Time and place.

how’s about the stardust diner friday night? the dumpster in the alley behind it is choice.

[mibgossip]

Rumor is, Agent Z can't tie his left shoe. No problem with his right, but the left one always trips him up...

was that a friggin’ pun ?? is that you, a, ya weirdo. if yer gonna give me tips like these you gotta at least tell me if it’s limited to shoes or if he can’t tie anything on his left side.

@agentzee

[mibgossip]

Agent V could legit do me anytime.

you and me both, eh ?? think she’d go out with me if i asked ?? i saw that catsuit on halloween maybe she’d be into me.

@agentvee

[mibgossip]

I hear Agent D wears pink underwear... like exclusively pink underwear.

so yer saying he left a red sock in his whites load and it turned all his underwear pink, or he only buys pink underwear ?? y’know it’s funny, either he doesn’t know how to do his laundry or he’s got this quirk that’s a li’l kinky

@agcntd

[mibgossip]

boy am i glad halloween is over. y’know you humans are so weird. you spend all year denying that monsters and aliens ‘n shit don’t exist, and then you go all out pretendin’ to be one. you don’t see me runnin’ around in a stupid costume, and no it’s not cuz i’m always wearing one. 

anyway, i got hearing that’s like a billion times better than you humans, so ya got some tips or gos on yer agents ?? i’m all ears.