i tried to explain what generational trauma is to someone recently and they were like “oh so because something happened historically, you get to have issues about it now?” and no.... that’s not what that is.
when i was in 8th grade, on my class trip to washington dc, we visited the holocaust museum. it’s a wonderful, extensive, informative place, and it’s a beautiful tribute to the victims. as a jewish kid, i knew what the holocaust was. i’d faced antisemetism every day of my life, and will continue to do so. i knew what had happened to my ancestors not too long ago.
but when i stood in that museum. in the recreation of the cattle trains used to move us to the camps. in the recreation of an auschwitz cabin, staring at the map of the camp. when i saw the pile of shoes and jewelry taken from the victims. when i learned how their hair, so very much like mine, was cut for having texture. and how their teeth were pulled for the gold fillings. i had a panic attack.
it was embarrassing, but i was a shitty little 8th grader, and i tried to hide it. but I couldn’t breathe. it was like there was a band around my chest the entire time i was in the museum. i was surrounded by ghosts, by the whispers of emaciated men and trapped women and crying children.
what is generational trauma?
it’s the psychological idea that trauma can be passed down through multiple different ways. trauma can change you significantly, even rewrite neural pathways and physically change how you think. that, paired with the cycle of subconsciously sharing our trauma with our children, as well as mixing with the trauma we learn as we grow, leads to some really rough patches in our relationships with our identites.
this is a really great 4 minute video from the healing foundation about the trauma carried by aboriginal people in Australia. tw for some really heavy topics, but all presented in a relaxed and serious environment.
what do we do?
well, honestly, i don’t know. it’s not like we’re gonna stop sharing our stories with our descendants, nor our histories. we can’t get rid of things related to our identities that give us our own trauma, the bigotry we face unfortunately isn’t going anywhere.
but being aware of your generational trauma is a good step. it’s not just being “sad” or “sensitive” to history. it’s our history still affecting us today. when your indigenous friends are made upset by discussions of colonization, when your black friends feel the weight of a millenia of racism placed on their shoulders, when your gay friends ask you to please stop using that word, when your trans friends see another historical figure deadnamed and misgendered, when your jewish friends can’t talk about the Shoah without their voices breaking.
so why the fuck are you lecturing us?
our murdered ancestors live on in us, in our eyes, our hearts. we are reminded of them constantly, made painfully aware of who we are and how many people hate us.
we were not supposed to survive, and if most of the world had their way, we wouldn’t have. (no, the allies were not heroes of wwii, you turned us away at your borders and continue to let us die from nazis today. if america had had the option, they wouldn’t have given a shit about jewish victims, but that’s a whole other essay i could write)
it’s time to start acknowledging the past, acknowledging your generational trauma and the trauma of those around you. i’m not making up an excuse to “have issues”. at the time i’m writing this, october 2020, i’m 17. i have felt this weight my entire life, and i will continue to shoulder it, as will everyone else.
my point is, maybe we can shoulder that weight together. maybe then it won’t weigh us down as badly. we have solidarity, and we are tough, and resilient, and strong, and beautiful. your generational trauma is something to be aware of, but not ashamed of. we can do this—change the world for the better. we can break the cycle so our descendants don’t feel as we do.
you should reblog this even if you’re not affected by it. goy do not care about jewish people at all and that is so fucking clear
reblogging again for thanksgiving. reach out to your native friends today. listen to them. show them kindness and respect and solidarity.
Generational trauma is why i started crying and threw a marker at my second grade teacher when she read the scene in Little House On The Prairie where Laura wants her father to abduct a native american baby for her to play with to the class.
Generational trauma is why my Native Youth program getting evicted from the building that we had been promised use of triggered a depressive episode.
Generational trauma is why I wake up sad and angry and mentally absent every columbus day and thanksgiving.
I don't have specific memories attached to those triggers that would warrant responses like that. I can't give you a thought progression of why I'm upset. But I've been feeling this shit since before I was old enough to even fully comprehend what happened/is still happening to us.
OP phrased it well when they said that our murdered ancestors live inside us. In my culture, we literally do carry the spirits of our ancestors. They see things happening that echo the trauma that they went though, and their pain is potent enough that we feel it.
An EXTREMELY good resource to get context and perspective for what generational trauma is like is the Dakota 38 documentary. It follows a group of young Dakota people who ride horseback to bring home the spirits of 38 dakota men that were hanged for trying to drive out colonists after repeated treaty violations. It was the largest mass execution in US history.
It's a really, really good movie, although I would like to content warn for brief footage of the men being executed and for themes of genocide and murder. It's extremely moving, at least to me and the other Natives who I watched it with. Watching it was probably one of the hardest times I've cried in my life.
I would strongly urge people without generational trauma to put in work to understand what it's like for us. You may not be able to empathize, but you can at least make an effort to ally yourselves with us.
