👑Allie👑 @mijolouis - Tumblr Blog

it's so small but this has always been one of my favorite liam moments. they start getting off tempo near the end of viva la vida so he just

and that one little moment got everyone back in time for the final chorus. and they nailed it.

#rip liam payne

userautumn

liam. oh liam. god. he was the one i worried so much about ever since the band. like, it used to be zayn but when zayn left and grew i thought "ok, he's going to be ok" because you could see after a while that the band was not good for zayn. you could see it. but liam, god. he carried so much weight, all the time. from the band all the way to the present, he was the guy who was supposed to be put together. he was "daddy direction" he was. yeah. he was that guy. and i know it weighed on him. i KNOW it did. the drinking and the fucking spiraling he went through after the band, it was all connected. and i'm not. defending his choices, i'm not. but i'm grieving him and i'm aching for him, and. i just wanted him to be okay. i really really thought that he would be okay. and he's not. and i'm. fucking heartbroken about it.

didhewinkback

one direction will always be so so so bittersweet to me like they were such a foundation of my teenage years while at the same time those boys were spending most of their days trapped in hotel rooms or waking up at 2 am to record an album and non stop touring and working so much more than anyone let alone a bunch of teenage boys should work and its always been hard to reconcile those two realities especially on a day like today because god when they were good together, they were so good together.

and i just don't think anything like them will ever happen again. 5 boys from basically working class backgrounds thrust into a level of fame the height of which hadn't been seen for decades, all of them becoming the breadwinners of their families before the age of 18. the immense pressure but also the amount of fun they were. the tragedy and joy of it all intertwined. really impossible to put into words

userautumn

some of 1D's best songs exist because of liam payne, by the way. liam and louis were the dream team. they all wrote some good songs, but man. every time liam and louis joined up together, it ended up being a fucking banger. better than words. end of the day. fireproof. there are so many, so many strong songs that took 1D from being just a silly little "girl band" (which is what they always were and always will be to us, to me) to being something special, something that pierced through the industry whether people liked it or not. that was my band. they were my boys. i will miss liam for the rest of my life, and i'm not exaggerating that. not only because of who he was in the band, not only because of who he could have been once he held himself accountable enough to grow. i will miss his music, his talent. his voice. god. his voice. i'll just miss him. i miss him already.

tommosloueh

fuchsiasea

i'm experiencing so many emotions. i'm still in shock, i'm still waiting for someone to come out and say it's all a lie. i also feel bad, and i feel guilty because i lost hope in liam a while ago, i discussed his behavior with my friends and i pitied him... i never wrote anything online bc even for the worst people, i will never write a tweet wishing for them to kill themselves. but i still feel guilty bc i doubted he could get better.

then i think about 1d and how much they mean to me, how big of an impact they had in my life... they saved me. then i think about how all of liam's addictions and mental problems started while in the band. then i feel even more guilty.

i said to a friend "i don't know how the boys survived 1d", and now that statement is not true anymore. i wish he could have gotten better and deal with all the damage he did to others.

i feel angry too... bc people will reduce everything to "he was good" or "he was bad", but it's way more complex than that. i once said people didn't want him to get better, it was way more entertaining for the outsiders to see him fall and break.

amidst all these mixed emotions is despair, i doubt people will learn from this, i know the press will have a feast, i know people will reduce liam to his dead and his wrongdoings.

i know that a lot of people won't understand how we feel, they will even call us names for hurting at the news... but i know there are some of us who just get it, because we feel it.

aliensingucci

it's crazy to think that memories you've had for years will just never look or feel the same again. all those memories from 2012 when i first got into 1D, all the concerts, all the songs and the first time hearing those songs, the first time watching music videos, the posts and memes here on tumblr... like none of it will ever feel the same. it'll always be tinged by loss and a degree of emptiness from here on out.

i literally haven't even thought of tumblr in the better part of a decade but i needed my people. i'm not even sure if anyone is still here.

meyhew

i have no idea how to process this. it’s not unfathomable and it’s something i’ve thought about many times but i don’t actually know how to process it. what do you mean he was such an integral part of me growing up and he did some fucked up things in part bc of the fucked up environment he grew up in and now he’s DEAD and can’t do anything to try and make amends. what do u mean the boys now means harry louis liam niall zayn. what do you mean he left behind a child less than 10 years old. what the fuck do you mean

discooccasionally

I feel so fucking lucky to have been shaped into the person I am today by One Direction. 2024 me does not exist as I am today, without them. How lucky am I to have be changed by them. I’m here today on this tumblr, with all of you- friends, mutuals, strangers- because of them. One Direction will always be woven into the fabric of my memories, experiences and dreams. That is a truth that cannot change. I am so so lucky to have loved them and be loved by so many of you because of them. Wow.

#one direction got me interested in the entertainment industry #which led me to my current field #i would've gone to a totally different college #never met my boyfriend #wouldn't be living in my current city #maybe wouldn't be alive because high school was ROUGH #i owe so much to liam and one direction #and i'm heartbroken i couldn't give it back

holyshit

the finality of death will never stop feeling like the most unnatural thing in the world despite technically being one of the most natural things in the world... it's such a weird internal battle trying to conceptualize how this can possibly be real. it makes no sense that someone could be here only a handful of hours ago and now isn't. someone around my age gone in an instant. someone i watched grow up. it's too final and i hate that i have to come to terms with this

kindofsharethat

and i guess i had this whimsical idea of all the boys sitting on a porch as old men reminiscing about the good old days in the biggest boy band in the world as five terrible dancers with a whole lot of heart, but life is cruel and just doesn’t work out that way sometimes, and it fucking hurts

mutualslovelouis

i did not once ever have a full night’s sleep from 2013-2015. nothing new to say that hasn’t already been said but it was so fucking fun being a one direction fan while they were still releasing albums/touring. can’t even put it into words or describe it. u were constantly terrorized while also having the best time of ur life.