no offense but i kinda hate the narrative that mike was being controlling...almost for the sake of being controlling i guess? like i don’t really think he’s a controlling person, or that he was being controlling in season three. i think he understands in a way that no one else there can, that el is a sacrificial person. she believes that everything that happened (will’s abduction, the mind flayer, etc etc) is her fault, and she wants to make it right. she believes she’s the monster. so she will do anything to put a stop to it all -- whether that means disappearing into oblivion, closing the gate, or searching for and fighting billy.
and don’t get me wrong! she has every right to make sacrifices. it’s her body, her powers, her life at stake. but she shouldn’t be the only one making sacrifices and solving problems, and other characters shouldn’t be solely relying on her to fix everything! she talked down billy with nothing but her words, something max probably could’ve done (and tried to do!) if she knew what to say like el did.
but the thing is -- mike was right. it’s not like he doesn’t trust her powers, like i’ve seen people say (he came up with the sauna test, a plan that relied on el’s powers!), but there is a limit. and yes, el understands her limits, no one said she didn’t! but i think she just doesn’t care. she is such a loving, sacrificial, selfless person that she’ll do whatever she can to save everyone, no matter the cost. mike understands that in a way that max and nancy can’t, simply because they don’t know her like he does! he knew her in season one, was there at the quarry and the school, and has spent every day for six months with her. his priority, at the end of the day, is keeping el safe. he can’t lose her. he never says she can’t use her powers -- he has no problem with it when she’s slamming doors, making toys move, even using them to stop billy in the sauna. but it gets to be a problem when it starts to look like 1983 again -- everyone is just sitting and watching her fix everything, and that ends with him losing her.
and also? even if we ignore the whole argument about her powers, mike proves over and over again that he wants to keep el safe. that’s it. he saves her in the sauna, in the cabin, holds her hand and holds her up throughout the mall, lunges at billy to protect her, you can even hear him saying “i’m just trying to protect el” while nancy is calling around asking about rats in 3x06! his issue isn’t with the use of her powers, or the fact that he doesn’t trust them -- no, it’s with the fact that everyone else is abusing her selfless nature and her powers. you know who else abused her powers with no regard for her safety or her limits, power-wise or principle-wise? brenner and kali.
and i’m not comparing max and nancy to brenner and kali -- not at all. max is a victim of abuse and would never treat someone like that. i understand. but at the same time, el’s leg was torn open with blood gushing down, and she still got up and subdued the mind flayer at the cabin! and not twenty minutes later, max and nancy are once again saying that they have to depend on her for help. lucas couldn’t have distracted the russians by - i dunno - making a balloon pop with his slingshot, providing an escape route for the scoops troop? that could’ve worked! but who did they go right to -- el. and later, when they’re trying to move the car, el volunteers to move it (though she just had a makeshift surgery preformed on her maybe a half hour earlier), and who’s the only one to protest? mike! and when el can’t do it, they’re forced to come up with another solution, proving they didn’t even need to try to use el’s powers in the first place!
and i don’t even get why there’s an argument, because at the end of the day, he was literally right. you can argue about his principle, or you can disagree about how he talked to max, or whatever, but el lost her powers from using them too much. he lost her. he told everyone that she was going to get hurt, and no one listened! and it frustrates me that he’s being played off as some kind of bad, controlling boyfriend when he was just simply worried about her. he was worried for her safety, just like he was in season one, and two, and now three. i don’t understand why, after the season came out, there was all of a sudden this narrative and opinion that mike was controlling, when that’s just always how he’s been. he’s always out for everyone’s safety, whether it’s el’s, or dustin’s, or will’s. mike is a selfless person who cares about his friends, but when el is the one he cares about, it seems like that’s the issue with a lot of fans.
tl;dr: mike wasn’t controlling, he was just right. he trusts el’s powers, and he trusts and cares about el, but she shouldn’t be the only one who has to carry the burden of the upside down and all of its consequences, and to me it seems like he’s the only one that understands that.
