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mileen

I carry my soul on the tip of my tongue

For everyone to taste

And my heart is made of glass

For everyone to break

nidhibhasin

Sometimes I ask myself what do I even want

What is it?

Is it love?

Intimacy?

Sex? Art? The ocean? The moon or the Sun?

there are so many things you can fill yourself with

why are you still so empty?

what is this void?

This void is not the absence of anything

it is the fear of too much,

aren’t you scared to go too far?

what is moderation?

either you stay dry or you completely drown

you desire what you fear

and you fear everything you desire

then you blame the stars, say you are deprived

you blame gods and men

but never yourself

You are a moth that loves the fire too much

So much that you strip yourself of any warmth it has to offer

(Oh moth remember, the cold kills and so does the flame, choose your death wisely)

-Nidhi Bhasin

mybeautifulbleedingpieces

as long as we do not die,

darling there'll be words

to stain blank sheets of paper

piled on your empty desk waiting

to be reunited with your pen,

there'll be stories about the night

we sat at the porch reminiscing

how we used to be good friends,

ah, cool, old days, we could not stop

talking as though the world is going

to end the next morning, you told me

how much you wished to wrap

your arms around me that afternoon I

was feeling under the weather,

there'll be tales to be told,

songs to be hummed,

poems to be recited,

darling, there'll be ample of words

to be written, so i'll let you fall

deeper into silence and revel

in the pangs if it soothes you

as long as we do not die,

there'll be stars twinkling

above us as we lean

for that last kiss.

-katie,

18th April 2021, 15:36

meanwhilepoetry

A reminder that healing is not linear, does not happen overnight and sometimes you discover wounds that you didn’t even know were there. Set backs are a part of your journey. Be easy on yourself.

ninasdrafts

“It’s been four months and ten days. Her picture’s still in your wallet. You see it every time you open it, but it hasn’t occurred to you to remove the photo, not really. There were more pressing matters to be taken care of. Like giving her hairbrush to her best friend because she doesn’t want to stop by herself, not even to gather her stuff, or to rearrange the collection of mugs she assembled over the years. Although she paid for them, she doesn’t want them back. She doesn’t want your shirts, either. The ones she always wore to sleep. The ones that - no matter how many times you wash them - still smell like her. You guess she only doesn’t want to be reminded of what these things once meant. Doesn’t want to be reminded of what you meant to her. It hurts, but you pretend to understand. Truth is you don’t. Because you are different. You are the exact opposite of her. You pretend you don’t care, but all these weeks, all these months you’ve been hoarding her stuff. Clinging to it. Looking for traces of her in the kitchen, in the bathroom, in that café you used to visit. A day after she left, you packed everything that belonged to her into a box and stored it in the basement. You told yourself you were fine. Five weeks later, you found her old scarf at the bottom of your closet. You may think it’s a shame that you broke down over a tattered piece of fabric, but it’s not. I can’t promise it’ll hurt less tomorrow. I can’t say it’ll be better in a week. But one day you’ll think of her and you won’t care about the questions you’ve been wondering about before. You won’t care that there's someone new at her side, you won’t care how or when they met or how they are just right in matters you thought you were not enough. You will think of her and wonder about just one thing. Is she happy? That’s all there is. That’s all there’ll ever be. That’s how you’ll know you found peace.”

— one day you’ll find peace / n.j.

petrow-deactivated20220923

lost and found

head in midnight’s box of lost and found, unsure of what i’m even looking for

i want to wear something old to return that lost feeling of youth

i want to read an old love letter to remember the force of blushing

i want to find something i’ve forgotten so this heart can again be surprised

my passwords have expired, my keys don’t fit the locks

“… anymore” is becoming too common a phrase

and this night just keeps getting darker

haleyincarnate

Quote by Jess Rachel Sharp

haikkun

akaiiros

my room smells like paint. purple. soft. warm. i think about how you would describe me if you had to write about me. i wonder if you’ve ever thought about how to capture me.

your room would have posters on the wall, maybe. i’ve never seen it. you won’t know i’ve painted mine, either. i won’t tell you. you won’t ask. i remember when i used to tell you, even if you didn’t.

i think about how to capture you all the time. i used to sneak pictures of you with your hair catching the light. i had a list of words to run through in my mind in case i ever got the courage to write about you.

teal blue. i almost painted my room teal. it would’ve reminded me too much of you. calm. steady. stubborn. clear. warm. i would have looked up at the ceiling and pictured your arms around me underneath your teal blanket.

it’s soft now, this ache. it feels like the ghost of a touch i can’t remember. your touch. i forgot the color of your eyes. i think that’s it, then.

nothingiwriteisforyou

There was this emptiness

Waking up this morning

Knowing that you were gone

Wondering what you’re doing

Are you listening to that song?

How you’re passing the time

Are you angry when you think of me

This love you’ve had for so long

Nothing to smile at anymore

When your phone lights up now

Nothing else lingers

But the dull acceptance of loneliness

Haunting to it’s core

Are you out there

Wondering about me too

If I still belong to you

If my heart is still so sore

Are you still around waiting for me

Wondering if I’m waiting for you too

//cutting things you say

haleyincarnate

I’M BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU.

shefancieshim

“1. My voice on the phone saying, “You’ll wait for me, right?” 2. Your voice on the phone saying, “It’s not a trick question! Me or him?” 3. My voice on the phone saying, “We’re destined to end up together, aren’t we?” 4. Your voice on the phone saying, “Jesus Christ, I don’t know how much longer I can do this.” 5. My voice on the phone saying, “I love you, my God, do I love you.” 6. Your voice on the phone saying, “Tell me you’re never coming back to me. If you want me to move on, tell me you’re never coming back to me.” 7.My voice on the phone saying, “I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to cause harm.” 8. Your voice on the phone saying, “I’ve never met someone as selfish and conceited as you!” 9. My voice on the phone saying, “I think you’re convincing yourself that it won’t work so that you don’t have to try. I think you’re a coward.” 10. Your voice on the phone saying, “You were the whole entire universe to me whilst I was merely a crack in the pavement.” 11. My voice on the phone saying, “You kissed her, didn’t you?” 12. Your voice on the phone saying, “You’re pushing me to the edge!“ 13. My voice on the phone saying, “This isn’t what I want anymore.” 14.Your voice on the phone saying, “Thanks for the memories.””

— different conversations about the same thing (after Trista Mateer)