Chronically Ill and Always Complaining

~~~~~~~~~anemia ~ anxiety ~ arthritis ~ depression ~ fibromyalgia ~ gastroparesis ~ gerd ~ ibd ~ ibs-d ~ insomnia ~ sleep apnea~~~~~~~~~ *all my symptoms are technically "mild" but I call bullshit.

[manly-misadventures]

I swear some mornings it feels like someone snuck into my room the night before and filled my body with cement while I slept.

[mildly-chronic]

Gods this was me this morning.

[mildly-chronic]

FUCKING ZOOM BITCHES

Took my modafinil 5 hours later than usual because I knew I’d be out late tonight at D&D. 

I have consumed a big ass thing of coffee, soda, and an energy drink. 

Y’ALL 

I can feel colors and see sound. 

D&D is real hard to pay attention to when your brain is going 2398r7q43907 miles an hour. 

[mildly-chronic]

It's been a weekish

So I've been on Modafinil for a week. The first two days I was SUPER AWAKE after taking it. Now I'm just awake. And dont feel the overwhelming need to continue sleeping when my alarm goes off. And I have been so tired that I'm nearly asleep between calls.

I miss the feeling of those first few days tho. Because omg that was amazing.

[that-depressed-puff]

Rejection sensitive dysphoria is a fancy word for “I don’t want to care what people think but if you give me the impression that you don’t like me then I will spiral into a depressive self-loathing for the rest of the day”

[mildly-chronic]

day 2

Took modafinil at 6, it's now 730. I dont feel like I'm going to have to drag my ass out of bed. But I could definitely go back to sleep.

I wonder if my crash will happen around 3 since I crashed yesterday at 2 after taking it at 5.

We shall see

[mildly-chronic]

Started fading around 2 full crash at 3. I am trying very very hard to not take a nap.

If this trend continues through the weekend I'm going to reach out to my neuro to see about going to 100mg in am and 100mg around noon. Because when I go back to full hours I'm not gonna last until 430

[mildly-chronic]

Work is really busy. Which is stressful. So of course I'm super nauseous.

[mildly-chronic]

day 2

Took modafinil at 6, it's now 730. I dont feel like I'm going to have to drag my ass out of bed. But I could definitely go back to sleep.

I wonder if my crash will happen around 3 since I crashed yesterday at 2 after taking it at 5.

We shall see

[mildly-chronic]

weeeeee

I took modafinil for the first time this morning. Tried to time it so it was kicking in when I actually had to be up. Because GP is a bitch and doesn't let me absorb things properly. (Sonata should be taken like 3 hours before bed for me)

Right now I'm super bored at work but I'm not fighting to stay awake. Which normally boredom = nap time because what's the point of being awake if nothing is interesting.

If this keeps up, maybe I'll do some chores after work instead of my usual much needed nap.

What is this magic? Do neurotypicals just feel this awake on the reg?

[howtobeapersonwithfibro]

Spoonie asks

Just thought I’d come up with some questions we could put in each other’s ask boxes that are more relevant to us as spoonies! Feel free to reblog, and I’d love to see some asks pop up in my inbox :)

Favorite soup?

What color is your bedding?

What color are your walls?

Do you have any pets?

Favorite activities to pass time when in bed?

Favorite activities to do on a “good” day?

Toughest chore?

Something you miss being able to do?

Phone apps you use a lot?

Favorite easy thing to cook?

Favorite disabled character from book/movie/tv?

Favorite “makes-me-happy” snack?

Who understands you the most?

Hobbies you don’t spend much time on anymore?

Short naps or long naps?

Quote that brings you comfort/peace?

Advice to new spoonies?

Advice to ableds on interacting with spoonies?

What’s been hardest for you lately? (physically or emotionally)

Something you appreciate more since becoming ill

Go-to outfit?

Favorite place to relax other than your room?

Favorite easy self-care things that help you feel fresh?

What’s on your To Do list for a Really Feeling Good day?

If you could have one “snap your fingers and ____ happens” ability, what would it be? (ex., snap your fingers and the dishes are clean)

What helps you feel better when you’re having a bad pain day?

What are you stressed about at the moment?

Any mental exercises you use to relax or help fall asleep?

Do you typically watch TV/movies on a TV, a computer, or your phone?

Name 3 good/productive things you did today (even if they’re small!)

[howtobeapersonwithfibro]

anyone want to send me some spoonie asks? :) I like interacting with my fellow spoonies.

[mildly-chronic]

med update

My sleep specialist wants me to take modafinil to help me stay awake during the day.

First my insurance denied it and then the approved it. Got both the denial and the approval letters on the same day. So that was fun.

I'm waiting to find out when I can pick the med up because my specialist wanted me on it for a bit before our next appt. And that appt is now just a month away.

I just want the wake up pilllllssssss

[littlestbabywitch]

Podcasts

Henlo friends. I am looking for a podcast to through myself into (since I'm completely caught up on my current one). My favorite is Lore!!! Stuff like that but also stuff you guys like

[adhdblackgirl]

I listen to most of the shows on the Parcast network. I love Lore!

[mildly-chronic]

I second the Parcast network recommendation. My faves are Cults and Serial Killers.

Other recommendations:

LeVar Burton Reads

Myths and Legends

Fictional

The Magnus Archives

My Favorite Murder

Welcome to Nightvale

Alice Isn't Dead

Aaron Mahnke's Cabinet of Curiosities

TMA, WTNV, and Alice are all continual storylines. The others are one topic per episode or season.

[vaguelyclevermatters]

Adhd is just a constant stream of thoughts being interrupted by new thoughts

[queer--punk-deactivated20190603]

Me: i have a chronic illness that makes me bed-bound, weak, and extremely sick if i overexert myself and i get extremely fatigued very easily no matter how much sleep i get.

Ableds: did you try uhhhhhhhh continuous physical activity where the main goal is to push yourself????????????????? also i think that actually this is anxiety lol????????????????????????????????????

[1dietcokeinacan]

“This Is Why You’re Always So Tired”

[bideogaymes]

god the last one is exactly me

[mildly-chronic]

1 and 3 are meeeeeeee.

I was actually just prescribed a wakefulness agent for mornings. So I'll take a medication to wake up and keep taking medication to fall asleep.

The only time I recognize is Pill Time

[ladyshinga]

“Yeah but am I hurting enough to take a painkiller?”

- everyone with chronic pain ever

[adhd-alien]

A very simplified overview over the 3 diagnosable types of ADHD. It’s highly likely that you have symptoms from across the spectrum and not exclusively “hyperactive” or “inattentive” - that’s why I see ADHD( and ADD) as one big family. Look up the DSM-V for the actual symptom list!

[bonethievery]

That adhd feel when being bored is actually mentally exhausting and nothing you do is stimulating at all or you dont have the energy to do anything that might help but being bored itself is whats making u not have energy but yeah boredom is hell and i want to die :-)