unrepentant floppy q hater. #1 m stannie [all] theyve never done anything wrong ever [we dont recognise nttd in this house] lets all get weirder and more psychological. anyway love to chat lets go girls. this is a sideblog btw [follows from borutosdad]
PSA if you want to make something based on my posts/headcanons/fics:
feel free to do so, but please please please:
credit me & link back to my post, especially when you take jokes or specific details i've mentioned wholecloth or near enough
if you make podfic of my fic, don't host it on sites like youtube or spotify, where people pay money to not have ads and there's no native way for people to download the fic.
you don't need to ask permission to make something as long as you do that ^^
i'd love for you to share it with me as well <3
about me:
call me n, he/him. also happy w mm, milesmesservy, etc.
im a classic bond fan: brunet bond truther, menswear lover, scottish bond believer, silly bond stan (so roger moore haters dnf [/j])
i like writing fic at toadsage on ao3
talk to me about 00Q, M/Bond, M/Q, Felix/James, other permutations ok too
#1 messervy/bond fan. rotating them always.
big fan of dom!top!q, sub/switch!vers!bond
slowly rewatching all the bond films to tier rank them, and reading the novels for the first time in order.
sometimes will post about other spy novels/media
I AM NOT BRITISH I AM IRISH!!!!!!!!!!! however i *did* used to live in scotland so am happy to provide free britpicking services or help. wont be perfect but im tryin. australia based now tho
however do NOT call me british or lord forbid *english* i will phase through your walls while you are sleeping.
also despite me posting about royalist q or british patriotism when it comes to characters, i am a republican [irish sense americans dni] through and through. do not get it twisted.
to-do list:
last bond movie watched: quantum of solace / skyfall
currently reading: dr. no
currently writing: serial peripheral interface, a voyeur!q 00q fic, tagged under "master-slave relationship (technology)" (see below)
info on tags & verses etc below the cut!
basic character tags:
legend: name tag = images of the character/fanart/images of their actor(s) or other canon depictions of the character; "core" = things that remind me of them; "thoughts" = headcanons and other writings about them that document my takes on them as characters
james bond: bond core / bond thoughts
q: q core / q thoughts
m: (usually refers to messervy or mallory) m core / m thoughts
felix leiter: felix core / felix thoughts
bill tanner: tanner core / tanner thoughts
mi6: mi6 thoughts / mundane mi6
moneypenny: moneypenny core / moneypenny thoughts
relationship tags:
00Q: bond @ q / q @ bond
M07: m @ bond / bond @ m
MQ7
Q/M
felix/james
tracy/bond:
q/bond/tracy:
fics & fic tags:
these are tags with inspo and thoughts relevant to fics that i am writing or have written
master-slave relationship (technology): 00q, q/omc. this fic is a leviathan that started out being a voyeur!q pwp and ended up expanding to include a whole bunch of q worldbuilding (some kooky, some kinky, some sad); bond & q slowly entering a protocol D/s relationship with some... let's call them bumps... along the way; a villain who is both stupid and menacing; a hero who is worse; me trying my best to learn welsh english; and a fair bit of m&s food. takes its name from the engineering concept.
reblog the promo posts:
James v United Kingdom: m | miles messervy/james bond. novel!bond's sub awakening. cockwarming pwp
verse tags:
these may or not become anything more concrete, but i put posts that remind me of these verses as well as thoughts i have on them in one tag. some are fluffy, some are sexy, all have a bit of comedy bc i love 2 have fun
basement brainwashing verse: after getting brainwashed by a villain, bond develops a kink for it. ever the good friend and technologist, q invites bond into his basement to try out his new invention
brainwashing chip verse: bio bdsm au, silva puts a brainwashing chip in bond's head
codename machine verse: codename headcanon (where james bond is a codename), except that mi6 has the technology to "graft" the memories of the old bond onto the new bond. they may use this on more than just 00s...
exes verse: 00q dated and broke up between skyfall and spectre
foster verse: established couple q/m take in a puppy sub bond, because he looks very polite
hcd bond verse: established 00q, post-retirement, bond becomes a q-branch human-centred designer
hypno sound files verse: q posts hypno induction sound files on the internet. bond discovers them. they find out what has happened in an. inconvenient manner.
jeeves and wooster verse: a biological bdsm verse where bond become's q's mi6 assigned sub and experiences the Terrors(TM) of making q take care of himself properly
oc tags:
tags for ocs who appear in my fics
b: (q's brother from master/slave, may appear in other fics?? tbc) b core / b thoughts / b @ q / q @ b
q's family (other family members from master/slave, may appear in other fics? tbc)
“Because the truth is, tech doesn’t have an image problem. It doesn’t have a message problem. It has an intention problem. What’s wrong with the axe murderer who broke into my house is not that he hasn’t successfully persuaded me to buy into his narrative. What’s wrong is that he’s trying to kill me with an axe. Similarly, when you launch a product that’s designed to put millions of people out of work, block access to sources of verifiable truth, replace human creativity with slop, and lower the barriers to every sort of atrocity, the problem isn’t that you haven’t told the public a good story about those things. The problem is that you are trying to do them.”
I think it would be fun to write a 00q fic themed around crosswords where each chapter starts with a related cryptic
I think cryptic crossword enjoyer Q is not something I'm gonna have to work hard to sell: he's got the scrabble mug, his general nerdy boy vibes (tho I do think there is an argument for him having decided one day, randomly, to learn how to do them, spending three months locking in and spending like an hour toiling every day to learn the techniques then finally when he completes his first entire crossword him taking a step back and going. Wow! These are pointless! And horribly frustrating! I'm never doing one again!)
But Bond I can also see Bond being crossword pilled (I did sort of soft launch this headcanon in Rush Hour Crush (T, 1.3k)) At the start of the put your back into it sequence in Skyfall he's the one who gets the closed tube stations thing, that's the kind of lateral thinking and pop culture knowledge bullshit that is good for cryptics, also like generally posh poshboy school vibes, class markers ect. ect. (I'm still seething at a particular cryptic where you had to substitute "school" for "eton"! Dastardly!!)
If you get a bit liberal with it and start pulling from novel canon, Bond is on 1 - 3 missions a year (some discussion here and here, but the start of Moonraker anyway) and is mega depressed/ bored out his fucking mind / barely feeling alive when he's not on a mission (here, the start of Moonraker/ From Russia with Love) and he can only spend so long dicking about the office bothering people and shagging married women or whatever so I think he'd need some things to keep him occupied and while away the hours waiting until he feels alive is needed again.
Also even when he's on a mission man must spend a huge amount of time in airports/ on planes/ other kinds of transport, probably frequently with literally nothing on his person, having had his cover blown/ dropped everything to chase someone to the other side of the globe. But what is something, light, portable, and inconspicuous that you can reliably acquire in any whsmiths (RIP you were always terrible) or equivalent anywhere around the globe? A newspaper! Going back to the books it is implied in Moonraker that he reads a lot of papers: '“You can’t open a paper without reading something about [Hugo Drax]. Sunday Express is running his life. Extraordinary story.”' Though this is contradicted a bit in FRwL: 'The Times, the only paper Bond ever read.' Anyway despite it's terrible everything I do think the Times is sort of The cryptic crossword newspaper in the UK.
So he spends a lot of time with his nose in a paper skimming over the headlines (it's useful to have a lay of the general lay of the world political landscape, especially the experiences of the elites he will bump into) but he's not going to read all the celebrity gossip (I do love the idea of culturally out-of-touch Bond) or the home & garden section. He'll have a wee nosey at the men's fashion section then he'll flick to the puzzles. He'll do a Sudoku if he doesn't read the language (do all other languages do crosswords? I have no idea) but he finds them more mind numbing than stimulating. He's done so many now the quick is just a warm up then through he can distract himself from the coming Horrors by mulling over a clue that seems, on it's surface to, be nonsensical but eventually pulling some order out of the chaos. Something something a parallel for what always seems to happen on his missions.
God that was a lengthy diversion, ANYWAY I think maybe they could bond (pun intended) over this. Maybe Bond breaks into Q's flat one sunday morning and catches him rather domestically sitting in his PJs with his earl grey chipping away at one while a cat gets in the way. I can't decide what Q would hate more: Bond offering answers that he definitely could have got himself, or Bond refusing to give him answers he can't get and forcing him to figure it out for himself. Both? Both. Both is good. Another day he wanders down to Q branch and catches Q on his lunch break and Bond can't resist showing off to the Q-branchers a little bit which is enough to drive Q nearly potty bc he has a very busy day and just wanted half an hour of peace! (I think you could get a lot of #bickering (my favourite thing!) out of this setup ) Maybe over time it becomes a bit of a thing and they start to enjoy doing it together as a social thing, clues Bond struggles with Q gets easily and vice versa, the clues open up conversation in a more casual and personal way than they've had through just working together and they actually get along quite well, even with all the #bickering.
But then on some mission with Q on the comms Bond starts chirpsing some mark by seductively talking them through the crossword he's doing while sitting sluttily at the breakfast table in whatever fancy hotel and it makes Q want to bite his keyboard and he absolutely cannot understand why. He's seen Bond literally fuck women on every continent, this is nothing. But it's not nothing, it's their thing. He's jealous and he hates it. *crisis ensues*
Maybe you could spin it out into a whole tryhard metaphor about Bond trying to "decrypt" Q in some sense, but ends up uncovering something about himself along the way. (beyond just like, desire. for Q)
Anyway I think writing and/ or pilfering enough relevant cryptics would make this one a challenge, and it's another classically Palmer extremely high concept idea with absolutely no substance underneath it. But maybe it would be cute. And I would get to subject people to a bunch of cryptics for my enjoyment. But will I write it? Oh almost certainly not xoxo
(AFTER typing 90% of this out I have discovered that it is defo inspired by Sigh No More (T (poss. M?), 20k) by dhampir72. I remembered them playing scrabble but apparently they also do crosswords, though Quicks not cryptics. this is why reading too much fic in a short period of time is a problem bc things start smearing together in my brain!! And also me workshopping a cryptic with brevifolia for A Searing Line (E, 51k) )
♫ The coldest blood runs through my veins, you know my name ♫
One thing I’ve really enjoyed in the last year, is finally getting some real favourite films on 4K. Casino Royale is far and away my favourite modern Bond movie and it looks glorious in 4K.
hate it when you see something in media that has great kink potential so you skedoodle post-haste to ao3 only to discover there's none fic left beef and then you have to sit there going oh I see I'M the pervert weirdo I'M the problem with society and everyone else in the world is going to heaven with a hundred innocence dollars preloaded onto their ole fashioned wholesome funtimes themepark fast pass card like fuckin oath man
Just found out the guy I've been fighting with via email over whether a matter is legal or finance's responsibility is the SAME GUY I've been chatting with in the halls. Oh my fucking god. I'd literally send him an email basically being like, you are incompetent and you are actively trying to evade responsibility, and then FOUR MINUTES later see him in the halls and go "Heyyyy bitch omg how's your wife, how did the vet trip go, when are you going to come to lunch with us on Thursdays omg stop avoiding us" he must think I'm CRAZY
