Well this is a new one.

Andulka
KIROKAZE
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

No title available
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

⁂

Product Placement
Sade Olutola
NASA
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
hello vonnie
we're not kids anymore.
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Not today Justin
Three Goblin Art
occasionally subtle

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Kaledo Art
seen from United States
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seen from United States
seen from Singapore
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seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States
seen from Oman
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seen from United Kingdom
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seen from Singapore

seen from Türkiye
seen from Germany
seen from United States
@minestronesoprano
Well this is a new one.
I'm back, bitches
I wonder if, in superhero universes, the villains ever get contacted by those “Make a Wish Foundation” and similar people.
I mean, the heroes do, of course they do, kids who want to meet Spiderman or Superman or get to be carried by the Flash as he runs through Central City for just thirty seconds.
But surely there are also the kids, who - because they are kids and sometimes kids are just weird - decide that what they really, really want is to meet a supervillain. Because he’s scary or she’s awesome or that freeze ray is just really, really cool, you know?
Oh, man, that would absolutely be a thing. The heroes would be so weirded out by it. The villains with codes of ethics would totally band together to force the villains without one (should they be the one requested) to do their part for the cause.
But imagine the person who has to track down the villains and organise everything?
Like, the first time it happens, no one actually thinks it’s possible, but one of the newbies volunteers to at least try. They get lucky, the kid wants to meet one of the villains who is well known to have a personal code of ethics (eg one of the rogues), and it takes them weeks to track the villain down to this one bar they’ve been seen at a few times, plus a week of staking out said bar, but they finally find them.
So they approach the villain, very politely introduce themselves and explain the situation, finishing with an assurance that, should the villain agree, no law enforcement or heroes will be informed of the meeting.
The villain, assuming it’s a joke, laughs in their face.
At this point, the poor volunteer, who has giving up weeks of their time and no small amount of effort to track down this villain, all so a sweet little girl can meet the person who somehow inspired them, well, at this point the employee sees red.
They explode, yelling at this villain about the little girl who, for some unknown reason, absolutely loved them, had a hand-made stuffed toy of them and was inspired by their struggle to keeping fighting her own and wasn’t the villain supposed to have ethics? The entire bar is witness to this big bad villain getting scolded by some bookish nobody a foot shorter than them.
When the volunteer is done, the villain calmly knocks back their drink, grips the volunteers shoulder and drags them outside. The bar’s patrons assume that person will never be seen again, the volunteer included. But once they’re outside, the villain apologises for their assumption, asks for the kid’s details so they can drop by in the near future, not saying when for obvious reasons. They also give the very relieved volunteer a phone number to call if someone asks for them again.
A week later, the little girl’s room is covered in villain merchandise, several expensive and clearly stolen gifts and she is happily clutching a stack of signed polaroids of her and the villain.
The next time a kid asks to meet a villain, guess who gets that assignment?
Turns out, the first villain was quite touched by the experience of meeting their little fan, and word has gotten around. The second villain happily agrees when they realise it’s the same volunteer who asked the other guy. Unfortunately, one of the heroes sees the villain entering the kid’s hospital and obviously assumes the worst. They rush in, ready to drag the villain out, but the volunteer stands in their way. The hero spends five minutes getting scolded for trying to stop the villain from actually doing a good thing and almost ruining the kid’s wish. The volunteer gets a reputation among villains as someone who can not only be trusted with personal contact numbers but who will do everything they can to keep law enforcement away during their visits.
The volunteer has a phonebook written in cypher of all the villain’s phone numbers, with asterixes next to the ones to call if any other villains give them trouble.
Around the office, they gain the unofficial job title of The Villain Wrangler.
The heroes are genuinely flabbergasted by The Villain Wrangler. At first, some of the heroes try to reason with them.
Heroes: “Can’t you, just, give us their contact details? They’ll never even have to know it was you.”
The Villain Wrangler: “Yeah sure, <rollseyes> because all these evil geniuses could never possibly figure out that it’s me who happens to be the common thread in the sudden mass arrests. Look man, even if it wouldn’t get me killed, it would disappoint the kids. You wouldn’t want to disappoint the kids would you?”
Heroes: “… no~ but…”
The Villain Wrangler: “Exactly.”
Eventually, one of the anti-hero types gets frustrated, and decides to take a stand. They kidnap the Villain Wrangler and demand that they give up the contents of the little black book of Villains, or suffer the consequences. It’s For the Greater Good, the anti-hero insists as they tie the Villain Wrangler to a pillar.
The Villain Wrangler: “You complete idiot, put me back before someone figures out that I’m missing.”
Anti-hero: “…excuse me?”
The Villain Wrangler: “Ugh, do I have to spell this out for you? Do you actually want your secret base to be wiped off the map? With us in it? Sugarsticks, how long has it been? If they get suspicious, they check in, and then if I miss a check-in, they tend to come barging into wherever I am just to prove that they can, even if they figure out that they’re not being threatened by proxy. Suffice to say, Auntie Muriel really regretted throwing my phone into the pool when she strenuously objected to me answering it during family time. If they think for even one moment that I’ve given them up, they won’t hesitate to obliterate both of us from their potential misery. You do know some of the people in my book have like missiles and djinni and elemental forces at their disposal, right?”
Anti-hero: “Wait, what? I thought they trusted you?!”
The Villain Wrangler: “Trust is such a strong word!”
Villain: “Indeed.”
Anti-hero: “Wait, wha-” <slumps over, dart sticking out of neck>
The Villain Wrangler: “Thanks. I thought they were going to hurt me.”
Villain: “You did well. You kept them distracted, and gave us time to follow your signal.” <cuts Villain Wrangler free>
The Villain Wrangler: <rubbing circulation back into limbs> “Yeah well, you know me, I do whatever I have to. So I’ll see you Wednesday at four at St Martha’s? I’ve got an 8yo burns unit patient recovering from her latest batch of skin grafts who could really use a pep talk.”
Villain: “… of course. Yes… I… yes.”
The Villain Wrangler: “I just think you could really reach her, you know?”
Villain: <unconsciously runs fingers over mask> “I… yes, but, what should I say?”
The Villain Wrangler: “Whatever advice you think you could have used the most just after.”
Villain: <hoists Anti-hero over shoulder almost absently> “….yes.”
The Villain Wrangler wasn’t lying to the Anti-hero. They know that the more ruthless villains would not hesitate if they thought for one second that the Anti-hero would betray them.
But this is not the first time the Villain Wrangler has gone to extreme lengths to protect their identities.
Trust is a strong word. The Villain Wrangler earned it, and is terrified by what it could mean.
My first official deadpool headcanon is this. This this this.
Okay but this whole concept actually makes a lot of sense, because villains are a lot more likely to be disfigured/disabled/use adaptive devices (bc ableist tropes), so of course, say, a child amputee is going to be more interested in the villain with a robot arm who almost destroyed New York than the heroes that took him down.
Also, imagine one of the kids gets better, and a few years down the line becomes a villain themself, except their crimes are things like smuggling chemo drugs across the border for families that can’t afford treatment, or stealing from corrupt businessmen to make donations to underfunded hospitals (idk this turned into a Leverage AU or something) and every time the heroes encounter her, they’re like “oh no. she’s getting away. curses. welp, nothing we can do.” Though it isn’t that she can’t take them on; bc of course once the villain from way back when found out what she was up to, he started helping/training her.
“I thought they just hired someone to dress up and pretend to be you,” she says, amazed, when he reveals himself. “I didn’t think they actually got the real you!”
Every year the Villain Wrangler gets a very expensive gift basket from the pair.
and for the kids who don’t get better the villains are there too, they show up to every funeral, they bear too small coffins on their shoulders and the heroes stand aside
they are fierce with grieving families assuring them that their child will not be forgotten, and they don’t balk at negative emotions, they don’t tell people to be strong or “celebrate their child’s life,” because these parents have every right to their grief and anger
and the lost children are never forgotten. flowers appear on graves during birthdays and anniversaries, heroes find pictures of those kids and they carefully take them down and ensure they’re delivered to the villain’s cell, and a few villains can be seen with friendship bracelets wrapped around their wrists the cops have learned not to try and take them off
WRITE A BOOK
cute, gender neutral names to call your significant other:
heavenly superperson
dipshit
a s a m u r a i
the united states: with huge boats, with guns (gunboats)
choshu
satsuma
guy with a cool mustache who’s trying to take over the world
How about ☀️🌅sunrise land🌄🌞
why I use ‘y’all’
it’s fun to say
gender neutral
I like rubbing my gay little hands all over southern culture out of spite
fun to say
i know basically nothing about hieroglyphs but what i can tell all of you is that this particular glyph is shaped like a Friend. thank you for coming to my tedtalk
#i think this is an F-glyph? egyptologist friends let me know if im talking out my ass
Yes it’s the ‘horned viper’ sign (Gardiner sign I9) and most commonly used to write the masculine first person personal pronoun ‘he/him/his’ as =f
Here is a real one!
It’s venomous, and the venom can cause hemorrhaging, but still friend shaped if you’re into bitey friends
my pronouns are he/him/his (venomous)
So I looked this up and the whole story is wild.
Basically, market research for japanese bakeries determined that a) they sell more breads and pastries the more different varieties they have, and b) japanese bakery customers prefer items which are not wrapped, because individually wrapped things give the impression of being like, preserved or something instead of fresh and good I guess? So the obvious solution is to sell as many different kinds of unwrapped breads and pastries as you can.
But! In actual practice, that’s a nightmare. No packaging means no barcodes to scan, so the cashier needs to know all like 200 different (often very similar) items by heart and add them up manually, which means training new employees is a slow and painful process and customer service in general suffers badly. And having a person handle all those un-packaged foodstuffs to count them or examine them, in addition to being slow and clumsy, is unsanitary as fuck.
So one bakery chain owner approached this computer guy in 2007 asking for a system to automate the checkout process. It took five years and the company barely survived a financial crisis in the middle, but long story short they developed a highly specialized AI that will look at the pile of bread a customer picked out and automatically identify everything, tally it up, and charge them correctly, while the live cashier is free to make small talk or help people out or whatever. The whole process is simple, fast, sanitary, and pleasant for customers and employees alike, and to an outsider it looks like fucking magical bullshit.
But then in 2017 a doctor saw an ad for this bakery scanning system and it occurred to him that cells under a microscope don’t look all that different from weird loaves of bread. And it turns out that yeah, you can use almost all of the same code to analyze a tissue sample and pick out any potentially cancerous cells in it. Other people have started buying the same program for everything from analyzing the readout from big physics experiments to labeling charms and amulets for sale at shrines to detecting problems in the wiring on jet engines.
Well this is a new one.
iwas looking at reviews for the drug theyre consideirng perscribing for me and
Yes, I love fun Tumblr memes such as:
carcinization
Diogenes and Plato
copper fraud in ancient Babylon
The Cask of Amontillado
unionizing
color vision of shrimp
Kellogg, founder of Kellogg’s
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
the Ides of March
what does this say
Men want her. Women want to be her. Children befriend her but their parents fear her. Doctors hate her and police officers' heads explode in her presence.
Scientific consensus on her nature and origins has not been reached.
Authorities warn civilians to stay away from her and report any sightings immediately.
Jolene
ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ Don’t ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ Stop ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ Me ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ Now
٩( ᐛ )و cause ٩( ᐛ )و im ٩( ᐛ )و havin ٩( ᐛ )و a ٩( ᐛ )و good ٩( ᐛ )و time ٩( ᐛ )و havin ٩( ᐛ )و a ٩( ᐛ )و good ٩( ᐛ )و time
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ i’m ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡ a ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ shooting ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡ star ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ leaping ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡ through ᕦ( ᐛ )ᕗ the 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ٩( ᐛ )۶ skyy y y y y
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ like
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ a
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ tiger
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ defying
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ the
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ laws
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ of
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ G
。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗR
・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗA
☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗV
。・゚・*:・ ・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗI
:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗT
。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗYYYY
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I’M
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ A
==ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ RACING
====ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ CAR
======ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ PASSING
=========ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ BY
===========ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ LIKE
=============ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ LADY
===============ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ GODIVA
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ i’m gonna go
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ go
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ go
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ THERE’S NO STOPPING MEEEEEEEEEEE
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I’M BURNING THROUGH THE SKY YEAH
ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡ TWO HUNDRED DEGREES
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I GUESS THAT’S WHY THEY CALL ME
ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡ MISTER FAHRENHEIT
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗi’m
ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡtravelling
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗat
ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡthe
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗspeed
ᕦ( ᐕ )ᕡof
・゚✧*:・゚☆ 。・゚・*:・゚✧*:・゚☆ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗliiiiiiiiiiiiiight
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I WANNA MAKE A SUPER-SONIC MAN OUT OF YOU
Why are they kissing through plastic wrap? o:
oh my god you dont know what pushing daisies is!!!! people dont know what pushing daisies is!!!!! oh my GOD anon strap in
okay picture this
Brian Fuller’s original 2007 magical realism romantic comedy with a dash of morbidity (after all, this is Brian Fuller we’re talking abt) & fairytale elements
as this review describes: “Characters & plot like Lemony Snicket, sets like Tim Burton, shots like Wes Anderson, rapid witty dialogue like Gilmore Girls, and costumes like uh, frickin’ magic.”
everything is Super Saturated All The Time and the costume design is literally flawless
starring: asexual bakery man, very tall very kind and himbo-adjacent, has low-level necromantic powers named Ned
Ned is, for convoluted reasons, the accomplice of a film noir detective named after a fish (Emerson Cod) who looks like a hardass but secretly loves pop-up books and knitting
Ned the bakery man is a Piemaker and works in and owns a building that looks like this
(there are novelty cherry lighting fixtures)
he has a dog, who is undead, bc aforementioned necromantic bakery boy has the unique skill of being able to touch dead things and bring them back to life
he and Emerson Cod touch murder victims, ask them who killed them, and then collect the reward. easy get-money-quick-scheme, UNTIL
Ned’s childhood crush and my life’s icon, Charlotte “Chuck” Charles, gets murdered on a cruise
he touches her once (ONCE) and is never able to touch her again, lest his necromantic powers zap her back to death. hence:
contact-free romance ensues.
I highly recommend the show for: asexuals, demisexuals, dog people, people who like pie, fashion & costume design enthusiasts, anyone who’s a fan of film noir, people who like pie and dogs and mermaids
literally this show is my absolute all time favorite PLEASE watch it
you can watch both seasons for free here
literally if you’ve ever cared for my opinion at all please watch at least the first episode i beg of u
PEOPLE DONT KNOW WHAT PUSHING DAISIES IS? This statement still surprises and astounds me. Go watch it, it’s so amazing
Also, recommend for musical theater nerds due to: Ellen Greene, Kristen Chenoweth, Raúl Esparza (who all sing in the show).
uquiz options that should be mandatory
this is too much text i didn’t read any of these
i’m not american
i’ve never heard of any of these things
i don’t main anything in mario kart, i’ve played it maybe one time ever
i’m older than 16
i don’t recognise any of these people
i was with my mother’s family and they were talking to me about my religious studies major. my great aunt asked me what the definition of hell was, and i responded “well i suppose it depends on who you ask.” and nearly all the protestants in the group decided that hell was “the absence of god” which i suppose is a fair answer, albeit not a universal one. my cousin’s wife was playing with her 3-year-old daughter and she says “well mommy says that hell is a mcdonald’s playplace” asdfghjhgfd
this 3-year-old girl is so fucking hilarious. her mothers have signed her up for a toddler yoga class, and so she has adopted a very unique language. this child also has an imaginary friend named “mom” which is, in her mind, the boss of her two mothers. for example, my cousin’s wife explained to me how her daughter got mad at them one time. the little girl situated herself in the corner of her crib, pretended to type on a cell phone and said “im writing an email to mom right now and telling her how bad you two are. namaste.”
the family’s Big Theory about “Mom” is that both my cousin and her wife are referred to as “Mommy” and “Mama.” The nickname “Mom” is not used in the house because it would just be confusing. However, when interacting with the world, people tell their daughter that they will “tell her mom” if she is doing something wrong. so this child automatically assumes there is this greater “Mom” figure that is responsible for distributing universal justice.
To be fair to the toddler, that’s pretty much how religions get started.
Our Mom, who art gonna hear about this,
U know the moment we reblog this, three years from now a whole hoard of reblogs will crop up with ‘this aged poorly’ in the tags right