Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Sade Olutola
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
KIROKAZE
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d e v o n
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Jules of Nature
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pixel skylines
tannertan36
DEAR READER
Love Begins
wallacepolsom
Cosmic Funnies
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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@miniature-cowboy
remember all those internet safety classes we took as children and how we proceeded to disobey literally every single one of the safety rules
Drinking game: Take a shot for each one of these you’ve broken
I’d have alcohol poisoning.
soleily the don’t download without permission thing could get me wasted for two weeks
lovely
“Brother, please!”
—————- Check out Super Paper Mario, and buckle up for a surprisingly dark ride.
@doc-whal’s posting super paper mario and i got in the mood to draw thiis fucker
GOOD
I love them both. Haha ♥ (////v////)
Me: *sees a new post in the natm tag*
Me: My skin is clear, my hair is smooth, the crops are watered and god is real.
me n roxie ( @tabletguardian ) were getting emotional abt ahk wearing larrys jacket in the deleted scenes and i was like ‘IM GONNA DRAW THAT’ and here we are
:,)
Alt. AU: Oops
Jed let out a sob, squeezing Octavius’s hand tightly. The baby’s head was moving past the cervix, thank god, and it was moving down quickly. “I-I’m ok… I’m ok…” He grit his teeth, ready to give it all he had.
A few pushes later, Jed’s perineum began to bulge outward, and the baby’s dark hair was visible between Jed’s folds. Hand trembling, Jed reached down to feel what was happening, stroking the dark hair carefully.
“A-almost there,” Jed murmured, tears rolling down his cheeks as he felt the soft hair of the infant. “Hhh… O-Ockie, I can feel it’s hair…!”
“See? Your doing well!” Rubbing Jed’s lower back as he felt for the baby. Looking down he could see the dark hair peaking out. “Hold on Jed. I’m going to get some towels for baby.”
Hurrying he found some clean bath towels, placing one under Jed Octavius took his hand again, “For baby…”
With the next push, Jed felt the baby’s head slide out, his body burning with the effort. He let out a sob, supporting the infant’s head with the hand not holding Octavius’s.
“O-Ockie,” Jed wept, burying his head in Octavius’s chest. “I… I-I’m scared, I… I dunno if I’m ready ta be a dad, I…!” He was cut off by another contraction, crying out. He pushed as his body told him to, moving his hand from Octavius’s to hook both his thumbs under the baby’s arms as the shoulders emerged. Using his last bit of strength, he kept pushing as he gently pulled the infant, the little one’s body sliding out into his hands.
“Oh my god,” Jed sobbed. He sucked the amniotic fluid from the babe’s nose and mouth, then spat it into a washcloth. The babe began to wail, lungs taking their first breaths. Jed began to weep, holding the infant against his chest as he laid back against the futon, not caring that the little one was still covered in fluid and blood and still connected by the umbilical cord.
He couldn’t believe it. Octavius was a dad. The moment baby came out he became a dad. Picking up a clean hand towel he used it to gently wipe the blood from the baby’s face and hair, “My… Jed, you did it! My gods you did it. Our child…”
Jed sobbed, both in joy and nervousness. “I… I did it… I did it.. O-our baby…” He rubbed the baby’s back gently, hands shaking. “Oh my god…. H-hi, honey…! W-welcome to the world…!”
“Hey, uh, hi. I-” Sobbing into Jed’s shoulder, “Baby is beautiful, Jed.” Shaking with tears, joy and excitement he laid a finger on the dark hair. “Has my hair…”
Jed nodded, sniffling as he lifted the baby up to see the sex. “Oh, Ockie… It’s a boy…” Tears rolled down his cheeks, and he carefully wrapped the baby in a towel and handed him to Octavius.
Taking the baby boy Octavius cried, “Hello, son. Being born is tiring, uh?” Using the hand towel to wipe away more blood, counting his toes and fingers, “You are a healthy little boy.”
Jed wept joyfully, burying his face in Octavius’s neck. “I n-never thought this family’d be united…! O-oh, this is… This must be a dream, I…!” He laughed happily, unable to express just how joyful he was.
“A-a family? You want me back?” Eyes wide Octavius turned slightly to Jed to avoid disturbing him, “After I’ve been such an idiot?” His fingers gently stroking the infants dark hair.
“Yer such an ass,” Jed growled, pulling Octavius into a deep kiss. As their lips collided, Jed let out a sigh of content, feeling as if he was complete once again.
When he finally released Octavius, Jed murmured, “We’ve been together fer six years, not countin’ th’ time we were apart. Why would I ever wanna throw that all away…?” He caressed Octavius’s cheek gently. “We’ve both been through utter hell… I think we should help each other through that, yeah…?”
“Yes…” Feeling Jed’s lips against his own caused tears of joy to fall. “I want to be there for you and the baby. To stop being a idiot lush.” Swallowing as a lump form in his throat Octavius nuzzled Jed’s cheek.
He remained like that for some time until he remembered, “Once your recovered enough I should take you to a hospital.”
Jed sniffled, leaning against Octavius lovingly. “…mmm, I guess… It’d be best ta make sure I’m healthy, I guess…”
He paused in thought, carefully taking their son into his arms. “Let me see this li'l guy fer a moment.” He put the babe to his chest, and with a little coaxing, the little one latched on eagerly. “There we go… If we hafta go to the’ hospital, I wanna make sure he has a full tummy before he’s whisked away.”
“And doctors will want to check to make sure baby is healthy.” Grinning like s fool Octavius rested his head on Jed’s shoulder to watch their son nurse. “We really need to choose a name.”
There was a soft cry as a white kitten jumped onto the arm of a nearby chair to watch what was happening, “Trying ti figure out what is going on? This is Opal, Jed. I saw someone abandon her in a cardboard box in a parking lot so I adopted her.”
"Oh...! I guess she smelled milk jus' now, wanted ta come an' see what's up," Jed laughed, smiling at the kitten. "Hi, Opal! Sorry, babe, but this is fer baby. But you can come over here an' say hi if ya want!" He smiled, reaching out a hand for her to sniff.
Alt. AU: Oops
Jed let out a sob, squeezing Octavius’s hand tightly. The baby’s head was moving past the cervix, thank god, and it was moving down quickly. “I-I’m ok… I’m ok…” He grit his teeth, ready to give it all he had.
A few pushes later, Jed’s perineum began to bulge outward, and the baby’s dark hair was visible between Jed’s folds. Hand trembling, Jed reached down to feel what was happening, stroking the dark hair carefully.
“A-almost there,” Jed murmured, tears rolling down his cheeks as he felt the soft hair of the infant. “Hhh… O-Ockie, I can feel it’s hair…!”
“See? Your doing well!” Rubbing Jed’s lower back as he felt for the baby. Looking down he could see the dark hair peaking out. “Hold on Jed. I’m going to get some towels for baby.”
Hurrying he found some clean bath towels, placing one under Jed Octavius took his hand again, “For baby…”
With the next push, Jed felt the baby’s head slide out, his body burning with the effort. He let out a sob, supporting the infant’s head with the hand not holding Octavius’s.
“O-Ockie,” Jed wept, burying his head in Octavius’s chest. “I… I-I’m scared, I… I dunno if I’m ready ta be a dad, I…!” He was cut off by another contraction, crying out. He pushed as his body told him to, moving his hand from Octavius’s to hook both his thumbs under the baby’s arms as the shoulders emerged. Using his last bit of strength, he kept pushing as he gently pulled the infant, the little one’s body sliding out into his hands.
“Oh my god,” Jed sobbed. He sucked the amniotic fluid from the babe’s nose and mouth, then spat it into a washcloth. The babe began to wail, lungs taking their first breaths. Jed began to weep, holding the infant against his chest as he laid back against the futon, not caring that the little one was still covered in fluid and blood and still connected by the umbilical cord.
He couldn’t believe it. Octavius was a dad. The moment baby came out he became a dad. Picking up a clean hand towel he used it to gently wipe the blood from the baby’s face and hair, “My… Jed, you did it! My gods you did it. Our child…”
Jed sobbed, both in joy and nervousness. “I… I did it… I did it.. O-our baby…” He rubbed the baby’s back gently, hands shaking. “Oh my god…. H-hi, honey…! W-welcome to the world…!”
“Hey, uh, hi. I-” Sobbing into Jed’s shoulder, “Baby is beautiful, Jed.” Shaking with tears, joy and excitement he laid a finger on the dark hair. “Has my hair…”
Jed nodded, sniffling as he lifted the baby up to see the sex. “Oh, Ockie… It’s a boy…” Tears rolled down his cheeks, and he carefully wrapped the baby in a towel and handed him to Octavius.
Taking the baby boy Octavius cried, “Hello, son. Being born is tiring, uh?” Using the hand towel to wipe away more blood, counting his toes and fingers, “You are a healthy little boy.”
Jed wept joyfully, burying his face in Octavius’s neck. “I n-never thought this family’d be united…! O-oh, this is… This must be a dream, I…!” He laughed happily, unable to express just how joyful he was.
“A-a family? You want me back?” Eyes wide Octavius turned slightly to Jed to avoid disturbing him, “After I’ve been such an idiot?” His fingers gently stroking the infants dark hair.
“Yer such an ass,” Jed growled, pulling Octavius into a deep kiss. As their lips collided, Jed let out a sigh of content, feeling as if he was complete once again.
When he finally released Octavius, Jed murmured, “We’ve been together fer six years, not countin’ th’ time we were apart. Why would I ever wanna throw that all away…?” He caressed Octavius’s cheek gently. “We’ve both been through utter hell… I think we should help each other through that, yeah…?”
“Yes…” Feeling Jed’s lips against his own caused tears of joy to fall. “I want to be there for you and the baby. To stop being a idiot lush.” Swallowing as a lump form in his throat Octavius nuzzled Jed’s cheek.
He remained like that for some time until he remembered, “Once your recovered enough I should take you to a hospital.”
Jed sniffled, leaning against Octavius lovingly. "...mmm, I guess... It'd be best ta make sure I'm healthy, I guess..."
He paused in thought, carefully taking their son into his arms. "Let me see this li'l guy fer a moment." He put the babe to his chest, and with a little coaxing, the little one latched on eagerly. "There we go... If we hafta go to the' hospital, I wanna make sure he has a full tummy before he's whisked away."
Returns: Surprise!
Jed frowned, huffing. “Not being turned on by yer fiancé? That’d be a crime.” He gently squeezed Octavius’s crotch, smirking at the firmness he felt there. “Mmm, but I can see that clearly ain’t th’ case. Yer all nice an’ hard fer me…”
Touching Jed’s crotched rubbed the cloth gently, “Wet for me, my dear? Aw, I am greatly touched.” Pressing their lips together as he reached up to fondle Jed’s chest through his shirt.
Jed groaned softly, his nipples pebbling at the beautiful sensation of touch. He bit his lip, grinding against Octavius’s hand with a whine.
“Want to have some fun here or in the bedroom?” Pulling out a chuck of pork with his fingers and feeding it to Jed.
“Mm… Bedroom sounds nice,” Jed murmured, smiling at the tender gesture. “That way, we don’t hafta go anywhere afterwards.”
“Well, except the living room to eat the meal we bought.” Laughing Octavius stood, offering Jed his hand up.
“I already ate most of mine!” Jed laughed, accepting the offered hand and standing. “I eat pretty darn fast when I’m that hungry… Takes a lot'a energy ta make a baby!”
Shrugging he walked with Jed to the bed room, “Do you have anything in mind, love?”
“You an’ me, makin’ love,” Jed resounded with a soft chuckle. “It don’t matter th’ details, as long as our bodies are wound up as one.”
Walking Jed to the bed he kissed him, “You want to top or bottom?” Removing the pregnant man’s shirt, throwing it aside his own joined it shortly.
“I want to make ya feel good,” Jed responded honestly, shrugging. “Whichever you’d like best is what I want.”
“Whatever you want.” Finishing undressing Octavius sat beside Jed and pulled him into a kiss.
“That doesn’t help me any,” Jed whined, pouting. “I’ll bottom… It’d be hard fer me ta top with this big ol’ belly.”
“You could try to be an aggressive bottom. Or I could let you top me standing. Like in the shower or something.” He was trying to be diplomatic knowing that Jed just wanted sex to equal.
“Nngh, I don’t even fuckin’ care… I want ya, an’ I want ya now,” Jed growled, feeling quite sexually frustrated. “So fuck me, alright?”
“Alright…” Laying Jed back on the bed he nipped at Jed’s neck, “I will make love to you, dear.”
Jed smirked, arching his hips eagerly. “That’s more like it, babe.” He tilted his head to grant Octavius access to his neck. “Yeah…”
“If you insist…” Slowly inserted his manhood into Jed’s vag. Moaning into to Jed’s neck Octavius sucked at his neck.
Jed let out a soft cry of ecstasy as he was once again claimed, feeling Octavius’s member fill him up beautifully. “O-oh…!”
“Better?” Groaning as blood pumped through his member, hardening he closed his eyes as he enjoyed the sensation of Jedediah around him. Placing his mouth below Jed’s ear, sucking at the tender flesh.
"O-oh, yes... Much better," Jed gasped as his neck was suckled. "Nngh... Better mark me as yers again so no one thinks I'm single anymore, heh...!"
Weirdness & Parties
“Mm… Yer such a slut fer this stubble…. I bet I could make ya cum without usin’ anything but my stubble!” Jed teased, an evil glint in his eye. He stubble-rubbed along Octavius’s cock slowly, up to the head, the prickly bristles caressing Octavius’s sensitive skin.
He tried hard not to thrust his hips into Jed face. Instead Octavius’ hips rose but he fought, the sensation made him speechless as the haze of pleasure and he began to thrust upward. Climax was almost upon him as the the stubble rubbed against his member.
Jed couldn’t help but smirk as Octavius began to thrust against his cheek, so close to cumming just from the rubbing. “Come on, babe. Fuck my face. Cum on my stubble. Show me how much ya like this.” He stilled his motions, allowing Octavius to thrust wildly against his cheek.
Crying out he came as Jed requested, covering Jed’s stubble in cum. Hips slumping back onto the bed as Octavius came down from the high. Feeling limp qnd loose as jello he just laid there breathing heavily.
“Mm…” Jed smirked, winking up at Octavius. “How’s that look, babe? My face all covered in yer cum…” He smirked, kissing Octavius’s softening member. “Delicious…”
Octavius just chuckled until Jed kissed his member then he shivered. “You are…”
Jed silently stripped himself, then straddled Octavius’s hips. “Mmm… Ya came so soon, ya naughty boy… What if I jacked off all over yer naked body as punishment, hm?”
“I’m at your mercy, cowboy.” Placing hands on Jed’s hips, fingers massaging the skin there. “Do what you will.”
Jed smirked, beginning to stroke his own member slowly. “Nm… Make sure ya watch, Ockie… Every damn movement.” He slowly pumped his cock, almost lazily, a soft huff escaping his lips.
Watching Octavius smiled, his hands kneeding the skin on Jed’s hips as he watched, “Hmmm… I shall pay a great deal of attention.”
A smirk on his face, Jed continued to slowly stroke his eager member, making soft noises of pleasure. Before long, precum began to bead at the head, and there was a coiling feeling deep in his gut as his body prepared for release. "F-fuck..."
Alt. AU: Oops
Jed let out a sob, squeezing Octavius’s hand tightly. The baby’s head was moving past the cervix, thank god, and it was moving down quickly. “I-I’m ok… I’m ok…” He grit his teeth, ready to give it all he had.
A few pushes later, Jed’s perineum began to bulge outward, and the baby’s dark hair was visible between Jed’s folds. Hand trembling, Jed reached down to feel what was happening, stroking the dark hair carefully.
“A-almost there,” Jed murmured, tears rolling down his cheeks as he felt the soft hair of the infant. “Hhh… O-Ockie, I can feel it’s hair…!”
“See? Your doing well!” Rubbing Jed’s lower back as he felt for the baby. Looking down he could see the dark hair peaking out. “Hold on Jed. I’m going to get some towels for baby.”
Hurrying he found some clean bath towels, placing one under Jed Octavius took his hand again, “For baby…”
With the next push, Jed felt the baby’s head slide out, his body burning with the effort. He let out a sob, supporting the infant’s head with the hand not holding Octavius’s.
“O-Ockie,” Jed wept, burying his head in Octavius’s chest. “I… I-I’m scared, I… I dunno if I’m ready ta be a dad, I…!” He was cut off by another contraction, crying out. He pushed as his body told him to, moving his hand from Octavius’s to hook both his thumbs under the baby’s arms as the shoulders emerged. Using his last bit of strength, he kept pushing as he gently pulled the infant, the little one’s body sliding out into his hands.
“Oh my god,” Jed sobbed. He sucked the amniotic fluid from the babe’s nose and mouth, then spat it into a washcloth. The babe began to wail, lungs taking their first breaths. Jed began to weep, holding the infant against his chest as he laid back against the futon, not caring that the little one was still covered in fluid and blood and still connected by the umbilical cord.
He couldn’t believe it. Octavius was a dad. The moment baby came out he became a dad. Picking up a clean hand towel he used it to gently wipe the blood from the baby’s face and hair, “My… Jed, you did it! My gods you did it. Our child…”
Jed sobbed, both in joy and nervousness. “I… I did it… I did it.. O-our baby…” He rubbed the baby’s back gently, hands shaking. “Oh my god…. H-hi, honey…! W-welcome to the world…!”
“Hey, uh, hi. I-” Sobbing into Jed’s shoulder, “Baby is beautiful, Jed.” Shaking with tears, joy and excitement he laid a finger on the dark hair. “Has my hair…”
Jed nodded, sniffling as he lifted the baby up to see the sex. “Oh, Ockie… It’s a boy…” Tears rolled down his cheeks, and he carefully wrapped the baby in a towel and handed him to Octavius.
Taking the baby boy Octavius cried, “Hello, son. Being born is tiring, uh?” Using the hand towel to wipe away more blood, counting his toes and fingers, “You are a healthy little boy.”
Jed wept joyfully, burying his face in Octavius’s neck. “I n-never thought this family’d be united…! O-oh, this is… This must be a dream, I…!” He laughed happily, unable to express just how joyful he was.
“A-a family? You want me back?” Eyes wide Octavius turned slightly to Jed to avoid disturbing him, “After I’ve been such an idiot?” His fingers gently stroking the infants dark hair.
"Yer such an ass," Jed growled, pulling Octavius into a deep kiss. As their lips collided, Jed let out a sigh of content, feeling as if he was complete once again.
When he finally released Octavius, Jed murmured, "We've been together fer six years, not countin' th' time we were apart. Why would I ever wanna throw that all away...?" He caressed Octavius's cheek gently. "We've both been through utter hell... I think we should help each other through that, yeah...?"
Weirdness & Parties
“Mm… Yer such a slut fer this stubble…. I bet I could make ya cum without usin’ anything but my stubble!” Jed teased, an evil glint in his eye. He stubble-rubbed along Octavius’s cock slowly, up to the head, the prickly bristles caressing Octavius’s sensitive skin.
He tried hard not to thrust his hips into Jed face. Instead Octavius’ hips rose but he fought, the sensation made him speechless as the haze of pleasure and he began to thrust upward. Climax was almost upon him as the the stubble rubbed against his member.
Jed couldn’t help but smirk as Octavius began to thrust against his cheek, so close to cumming just from the rubbing. “Come on, babe. Fuck my face. Cum on my stubble. Show me how much ya like this.” He stilled his motions, allowing Octavius to thrust wildly against his cheek.
Crying out he came as Jed requested, covering Jed’s stubble in cum. Hips slumping back onto the bed as Octavius came down from the high. Feeling limp qnd loose as jello he just laid there breathing heavily.
“Mm…” Jed smirked, winking up at Octavius. “How’s that look, babe? My face all covered in yer cum…” He smirked, kissing Octavius’s softening member. “Delicious…”
Octavius just chuckled until Jed kissed his member then he shivered. “You are…”
Jed silently stripped himself, then straddled Octavius’s hips. “Mmm… Ya came so soon, ya naughty boy… What if I jacked off all over yer naked body as punishment, hm?”
“I’m at your mercy, cowboy.” Placing hands on Jed’s hips, fingers massaging the skin there. “Do what you will.”
Jed smirked, beginning to stroke his own member slowly. "Nm... Make sure ya watch, Ockie... Every damn movement." He slowly pumped his cock, almost lazily, a soft huff escaping his lips.
