Completely different from everything Ive ever posted but I have no one to talk about this with.
Rant/vent warning‼️
So me and my bestfriend have been flirting for like the past 5 months or so and its been like pretty serious sounding flirting and Ive been into her for FOREVER but was trying to get over it cause I thought she was straight. I come to find out one random day she really REALLY likes me but she has a boyfriend and hes like the stereotypical affliction male manipulator douchebag type and has cheated on her and continues to lie to her which shes aware of but wont leave him. I thought now that our feelings were out in the open maybe she’d idk fucking dump the guy??? But she hasnt? And its been around a month that we’ve established that we like each other. And I wanna wait and the way we act is like were already in a relationship except to everyone she knows I’m her bestfriend and this absolute jackass is the love of her life. I’ve asked why I’m still waiting if she “loves” me so much and why Im the one being hidden if in her words I mean way more to her than he ever has. At first it was whatever like annoying but I could wait but now its just like?? Why??? If I mean so much why the hell am I sitting here waiting for her to dump this douchebag? The worst part is Id still wait either way I just feel impatient and annoyed. Hes at her house right now and Im stuck sitting here hoping nothings getting physical at the very least. The way she acts with me can 100% be classified as cheating and I know if he saw our texts he would be pissed so I just feel like some dirty little secret shes keeping on the side. She cant even tell me why shes still with him anytime I ask its just “I dont know” or “I cant answer that” like give me something to keep me hopeful at least. Its actually driving me insane and part of me wants to move on and keep myself open to other options cause why should I wait and shut down any flirting with other girls if shes over here having sex with a guy she “doesnt love.” She only ever complains about him but god forbid she dump him.
Okay rant over thanks for reading I might delete this in the morning🥹 happy pride chat
