Missing you
Eddie Munson x fem reader x slight Steve Harrington x reader
Trigger warning: angst, hurt. Slight allusions to smut. Slight cheating. Minors DNI !!
My first time posting here. So here goes đ„
ă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïžă°ïž
18 + below the cut
âIâm going to clear up and then get your meds baby ok, you want water or juice ?â You say quietly as everyone talks and laughs around you. He had been smiling and laughing with them all and it was like music to your ears. Seeing a little of the old Eddie had a huge smile on your own face.
âWaterâs fineâ he mumbles now like a sullen child as he looks away from you and you get up, kissing his cheek and start clearing away when you see Eddie wince as he moves and you are by his side checking him, fussing with his side and he glares at you
âfucks sake Iâm fine.â He growls and you step back slowly, your best fake smile on as you head away pretending you donât see the awkward looks your group of friends share.
Carrying plates into the kitchen the silence that had followed his outburst sounded loud in your ears before conversations started up again.
You stopped as you heard him laugh at some thing stupid one of the guys said and placing the used china on the counter and wept, head rested against the refrigerator and sobbed silently, a fist in your mouth to stop the noise of your heartache.
You had cried plenty when it happened and you thought he was going to die, wept openly as he laid unconscious for weeks as his body recovered and the doctors healed him. Sobbed tears of joy when he woke up and looked at you, grasping your hand like you were his lifeline.
Every tear has been for him. But these ones are for you, for your loneliness, your exhaustion, your inability to understand why he seems to hate you now.
You donât hear someone come in until they already have their arms wrapped around you and for a second your heart sparks with hope that he is going to show you even a smidge of the affection he used to lavish you with but as you open your eyes and are met with a different set of brown eyes your heart breaks a little again.
âOh hi Steve, sorry iâm sorry just having a little pity party for one in hereâ you joke but it is flat and unbelievable and and he doesnât say anything just pulls you in holds you close. Strokes your back and makes soothing shushing noises in your ear until you can feel yourself calming down.
If someone had told you six months ago you would be stood in Steve Harringtonâs arms you would have laughed in their face.
Even though he had graduated he would always be King Steve and as much as you were not unpopular you had always flown below the radar, a small group of unassuming friends, not part of any group or clique and he had no idea who you were before you had all been dragged into hell together.
Now, now you were friends, had got close in the upside down and closer still as he was the one to carry your broken boy out of that godforsaken place and visited him religiously at the hospital. He and Eddie had bonded and were close now and to you both, Steve was a good friend.
âYou wanna talk about it ?â He asks as you pull away from his warmth and comfort and shake your head
âis he always like that, with you ?â
Wanting to protect his character and yourself from scrutiny but being too tired to hide the facade anymore you shrug then nod.
âI think he hates meâ it comes out as a whisper, the singular thought you have been too terrified to voice and Steve sighs heavily
âhoney, no he loves you.â
He had loved you.
You had met freshman year at Hawkins High, a mop of messy curls a little too long on his head, looking at anyone who came near him like he couldnât care less but you saw something in his eyes that showed a desperation for acceptance of who he was.
You didnât become friends straight away, classmates and you would occasionally talk but it was in sophomore year when your friend Laney developed an unhealthy obsession with Jeff, band member, fellow hellfire member and friend to Eddie that the two of you started hanging out.
When they started dating you found yourself in Eddieâs orbit. With his teasing and his dramatics and his devil may care attitude about everything, you fell hard and so did he.
The first day you sat at the hellfire table with Laney, he had grinned at you and you had rolled your eyes at your friends being gushy with each other.
âCome sit with me sweetheart, i canât subject you to them when we can have fun.â
There was no big dramatic story of how you got together it was a natural progression from a solid, flirty friendship to the night on 4th July, watching the fireworks with the gang at lovers lake and he had looked at you as he passed you the joint and as you glanced up at him he had nervously leant down and kissed you. A soft lingering closed mouth kiss that had you blushing and your stomach swarming with butterflies.
You giggled as he pulled away and he snorted a soft laugh âoh baby you have no idea how long I have been wanting to do that.â
âBeen wanting you to.â you answered and his eyebrows shot up under his bangs as he broke out into the widest smile, showing his dimple âyeah ?â
and you couldnât stop yourself as you kissed that beautiful dimple nodding in earnest before leaning your head-on his shoulder and he put his arm around you.
His touch very rarely left you after that, walking the school halls his arm was slung casually over your shoulder, watching a movie, it was tightly around you as he stroked your side or trailed his fingers up and down the back of your arm. In the van he had one hand on your leg while he drove.
Hellfire that arm was around your middle where he had made you sit on his lap, small pecks on your shoulder or neck as he got animated during his DM duties. After a gig both arms would be used to pick you up, sway with you to a song playing only in his head. Fingers would hold your hand.
The boys in hellfire would groan. Complaining of how Eddie was obsessed and how they didnât need to see him slobbering on you every second. Your friends after getting over the shock of you together would giggle and comment on how smitten you both were. Made for each other, they all said.
It was a night after a drive In movie with Laney and Jeff, a double date when you had plucked up the courage after weeks of heavy make out sessions that had been stopped before they went too far.
âEddie ?â You whispered and he turned to you, still drumming his fingers to the music playing quieter than usual
âYes baby ?â
âCan I come back to yours ?â He nearly swerved into the other lane, not that there was much traffic at this time of night but he corrected and stared back at you as you giggled âum yeah of course.â
As you had pulled up to the trailer and he had led you inside holding your hand he had held you close, breathing deep as he kissed your head.
âIâm not expecting anything you know that right ?â He asks and you nod looking up at him, chin on his chest as you smile at him.
âI know baby, and I love you for it . But I really, really need you to touch me, want you to make me feel good . If thatâs ok ?â
He groaned as he leant down and kissed you, hot and desperate until you were both panting into each otherâs mouths and he kissed along your jaw and to your neck. âYou are so perfect, I love you, you know that donât you ? Youâre my whole world.â
He worshipped your body, his mouth would kiss every inch of you, pulling soft and dirty noises from you as he showed you over and over how much he loved you.
And he would tell you all the time
âFucking hell I love you babyâ
âHow did I get so lucky to get the best girl in the worldâ
âHow is the love of my life this fine day ?â
The day you graduated and he didnât he had been so proud of you even though he was frustrated and embarrassed at failing for a second time but he had stood up whistling obnoxiously as you walked the stage
âthatâs my fucking girlâ which had resulted In you giggling with embarrassment, your parents tutting and him being escorted from the school gymnasium but hadnât stopped him waiting with your parents afterwards and kissing you over and over again âI am so proud of you baby. I love you so much.â
Over and over he showered you with love and affection. In his unique over the top wonderful way.
When Chrissy had died and you had found him hiding in the boat shed, there wasnât a moment that you believed that he had done anything to her. Not your sweet man. You both sat dumbstruck and terrified while the strange group of friends explained the dark history of your small town. There was no question that you would fight side by side with the love of your life.
When he cut the rope, staring up at your terrified and confused face he had looked at you with all the love in the world and you could see how scared he was as he spoke softly to you âI love you. I will always love you but I need you safe. I need to give them more time. So leave now ok ?â
âNo Eddie please, not without you, please baby please come back.â
âIâm sorry sweetheart please forgive me. I love you, I love you so much. God Dustin get her out of hereâ
By the time you managed to get back through, injured and terrified you found him bleeding out on the ground.
He had died in your arms, your hero. But you wouldnât give up, wouldnât stop trying to bring him back, then his heart started beating again, erratic and weak but there and you screamed at Dustin to get Steve to carry him out.
But he wasnât your Eddie anymore, it seemed the part of him that loved you had died in the upside down.
Even after getting his name cleared when the presumed dead chief of police came back and sorted it all. The hugs money from the government helped get you a new home together and all his medical bills paid for but nothing helped.
Steve is still looking at you, it feels like the first time someone has really seen you in months âhe has PT tomorrow right ? Meet me for coffee , take a break for a bit.â You sniff and nod âyeah ok thanks.â
When everyone had left Eddie had made his way to the chair he slept in, after changing in the bathroom with you stood nervously outside the door in case he needed you.
âI need to put the cream on Edsâ you said quietly, nervously as he pulled the blanket over his legs and he sighed heavily
âFineâ. Moving onto his side he lifted his shirt up, staring at the wall behind you as you massaged the awful smelling cream into his scars, when you got to the deepest one you heard his sharp intake of breath âSorryâ you mumbled and he shook his head a little eyes pinched tight âYou want me to lay with you ? I can read orâ
âmâtiredâ he cuts you off and you nod âyeah of course, it was good having everyone here though right ? All together, maybe we can make it a more regular thing.â
he shrugged already flipping through the channels on the remote and you leant down, praying that he would turn his head towards you tonight, capture your lips with his but his gaze stayed firmly on the TV
âGoodnight Eds, i love youâ you kissed his cheek and walked away you thought you heard him say something but when you turned back he had his eyes closed.
Over coffee and a plate of fries, Steve has managed to talk your ear off, telling you about applying for a new job and funny things Robin had done or said.
âSo are you heading back to classes soon ?â Avoiding his eye you shake your head.
Your parents had been disappointed you hadnât gone out of state to college, when you graduated opting to stay close to Eddie while he stayed behind in school and if they hadnât already moved out of town, begging you to go with them they would be even more so that you were dropping out of community college too.
âTaking a year out until Ed is back on his feet, payout we got will see us through until he graduates or i get a job.â
âHeâs going back to school ?â He asks cautiously and you sigh ânot physically, they told him he can still get his diploma if he does the work at home, Dustin brings it every week.â
Steve smiles at the waitress who refills your cups before leaning back in. âAnd is he doing the work ?â
Blinking away tears you shake your head âhe is just so tired and PT takes it out of him. I am helpingâ
âYouâre doing the work for him arenât you ?â
Your guilty silence gives him his answer.
âOk I get it, you doing the work, you taking time out of college and taking care of him. But the way he talked to you, is that a common thing ?â
You shrug âitâs fine Steveâ
âNo, itâs notâ
Throwing a five dollar bill down you stand up grabbing your purse and he holds your wrist
âI need to go and get him.â He nods âIâll come too.â
When you arrive he is waiting outside smoking as you pull up in Steveâs BMW
âHi Eds sorry I am late, how was it ?â You kiss his cheek and he nods to Steve âHarrington. You bumped into each other ?â
âNo Steve asked yesterday of I wanted to get coffee while you were here. Eds you shouldnât be smokingâ
He narrows his eyes âwell that sadistic prick worked me too hard and I need something. â he snaps and you shake your head as Steve steps forward.
âEddie take it easy man she is looking our for you.â The air is thick with tension but he persevered clearing his throat as he runs his hands through that infamous hair.
âso I thought we could hang out tomorrow, everyone is coming to mine, swim, few beers ?â He asks with a grin and Eddie stares between us âyou asking me or her ?â He frowns and laughs âboth, you two are a package deal right ?â
He blows the smoke out of his mouth with a bitter laugh and stomps the butt on the floor.
âyep, thatâs right. Sure will see you tomorrow.â Then he is walking to his van not even bothering to say goodbye or wait for you.
âHoney ?â
âSo midday ? Can we bring anything ?â You ask blinking back tears and he gives you a pitying look âno just yourselves. Take care.â Then he kisses your cheek and squeezes your arm before you make your way to the van and sit in an uncomfortable silence back to the trailer.
You have cleaned the bathroom, got his meds and are now cooking dinner and he still hasnât spoken a word to you. âSo um Steve mentioned this um oil stuff he had got that is really helping with his scars form the uh you know bites he got. He gave me the name and I was thinking I would get some next time I am in town ?â
âSteveâs scars arenât as deep as mine.â He says not even looking at you as he turns the page of his book.
âI know but canât hurt to try right ? Steve swears by it.â
He looks at you then and you see the sheen of tears in his eyes âoh baby what is it ?â
You say going over to him and cupping his cheeks, he leans into your touch and your needy heart craves him. Leaning your forehead against his âI hate this â he says thickly and you kiss him, his cheeks, his nose, his forehead, his chin, tiny butterfly kisses all over him overwhelmed by your need for his touch as you tentatively kiss his lips he pushes forwards, putting his hand on the back of your head and pulling you into a searing kiss, his tongue against your top lip begging for more and you give it to him. You will give him everything. He tugs you into his lap and you lie next to him on his good side still kissing him as he trails his fingers down your side and you are euphoric, your brain shuts off to everything but the feel of his hands on you and then you screw up. You put your hand under his shirt, greedily wanting more of him and he freezes and you panic âoh god Eddie I am sorry, did I hurt you, what can I do ?â
He pushes your hand away. Panting still, lips swollen and pink but his eyes are dead again.
âNothing. Iâm tiredâ he says and turns his head away from you.
You didnât sleep a wink, had got used to sleeping by yourself finally but now after last night and that kiss, having that small moment where everything in your world felt right before having it snatched away, the bed had felt too big and your arms had felt too empty.
Maybe thatâs why you let yourself relax a little with your friends, why you drank more than you had since before Chrissy had died, and why you avoided Eddie.
He was with the boys and he had barely said two words to yiu all day. He would be relieved to not having you breathing down his neck.
âAnother beer ladies ?â Steve said to you and Robin as you sat on the sun loungers soaking up the rays in your little bikini, Eddie used to be obsessed with it and you had hoped wearing it would bring back some of those feelings for him but so far he has barely glanced at you, when Steveâs eyes trailed your legs you felt instantly guilty at the frisson of pleasure it gave you. Especially as you looked up and met Eddieâs eyes who quickly looked away.
âSure thanks Steve I am going to take a quick dip, Rob ?â She shakes her head âno Iâm goodâ
Getting up you walk towards Eddie to check on him but stop at the last minute and get in the pool.
The water feels amazing, the slight buzz from the beer and the sun has you relaxing for the first time in months.
It continued too, as the afternoon turned to evening and you were all sat around, you now wearing a dress and sat next to Robin. The conversation was light and teasing at first but soon the conversation changed to what you had been though, but humour was used to help with the trauma. âLook Iâm sorry Mike but you have no idea. Your sister using a. Shotgun to take him out is the hottest thing I have ever seen, closely followed by these two badasses as they took down those bats.of courseâ He nods to you and Robin and you shake your head as Eddie excuses himself. You know he doesnât want to talk about this
âNope, sorry. Sexiest thing was the most metal concert in the world. I forgot several times that he was doing it for our lives and just had very dirty thoughts. Of course when he cut the rope.â
Robin squeezes your arm as you are overcome with emotion and love for this little group you share your trauma with.
âI owe you big time forever. No way were Dustin with his busted ankle and me and my dislocated shoulder getting him out of thereâ
âYou donât owe me shitâ he says shaking his head looking proud. You are so focussed on the group you donât hear Eddie come back out.
âAll I know is you, Steven Harrington will forever hold a special place in my heartâ
He squeezes your knee as you hear Dustin ask âyou ok ?â
Looking up and Eddie is stood looking angry but beyond that you see the pain and in a panic check your watch âoh shit. Your meds, baby I am so sorry I didnât realise the time. I will get them.â
Jumping up you walk inside to where you have left your purse and grab his pulls and a bottle of water, rushing out you hand them to him and he takes them without a word ad you stand wringing your hands together. âIâm so sorry Ed, are you ok ? I guess I drank too much and I got distracted.â
His eyes flit to you and he mumbles âitâs fine.â
âCome on man give her a hug or something she feels awfulâ Steve says laughing and you want to cry as he freezes. Not noticeable to everyone else but to you it is.
âOh god donât encourage them Steve, we have seen enough of Eddie slobbering on her to last us a lifetime.â Mike shakes his head as Steve laughs again âyeah I remember, they have always been like thatâ
You and Eddie are staring at each other. Your chest hurts with unshed tears as he just stands there.
âIâm fine. Donât be silly and donât worry kids we wonât subject you to it tonight.â You laugh but it sounds strangled to your ears. âBathroomâ you say and turn on your heel. Making your way into the house and out the front door, sitting on the porch as you will yourself not to cry again.
When the front door opens not ten minutes later you donât even bother to turn around âwhy is it always you coming to check on me ?â
He sighs and sits next to you âbecause I care about you.â
A sob comes out âat least someone doesâ
âHe does, but he is so angry.â
âHe wonât touch me. Wonât kiss me, doesnât even hold my hand. He sleeps on that fucking chair in the living room and I lay every night in a double bed, missing someone i donât think even exists anymore. â
Holding your hand while you cry he strokes your knuckles with his thumb.
âI didnât realise how bad it was, we can help more. Give you a break or just leave him by himself sometimes and come and hang out with us . Look maybe I am overstepping but this is the first time I have seen you genuinely smile since he came round in the hospital.â
So you did, you started seeing them all more. As a group or sometimes individually, Steve was a huge support, he would come and take Eddie out too to try and get him back into things. He started doing hellfire on a Friday again and he always seemed so animated when he came back.
Tonight Steve and Robin came over and you were going to hang out, watch a movie and drink.
Eddie definitely drank, you hadnât noticed though but after they left he was sat staring into space and when you touched his arm he flinched.
âWhy did you bring me back ?â He says almost a whisper full of anger.â
And you feel your heart speed up âbecause I love you Eddie.â
âI have nothing to live forâ
âYou have everything to live for, Wayne your friends, me. â
He scoffs nastily. Oh yeah I have you ? What as my nurse, my carer. Out of some kind of guilt or dutyâŠ.â
âEddie, no. Thatâs notâ he cuts you off by throwing his beer bottle across the room.
âFuck donât you get it ? I canât go to school, I canât work, canât play with the band. The whole town sees me as a murderer . I am in pain all the time and I I look like this. All because you couldnât just let me fucking go. Why didnât you just let me die ?â
You are sobbing and shaking, and you can feel the bile rise in your throat and the way your gut twists
âBecause I love you. We can be ok babyâ
He looks so tormented, the pain in his gestures nearly knocks the wind out of you as he looks away. .
âI have nothing here. Nothing is worth shit in my life anymore.â.
After another sleepless night, the two of you donât speak all day. You make his meals and get his meds as the tension between the two of you grows so thick you are choking on it. You have got to get out of there.
Grabbing your purse you turn to him
âI am going out for a while. Movie night. Do you need anything before I go ?â
He frowns looking like he wants to say something before shaking his head and turning away from you.
Youâre not even sure where you are going until your car turns into the familiar long driveway.
After holding your for nearly an hour trying to calm you down after explaining everything to him. Steve was now on a mission to make you smile..
âI still remember that day Jimmy Smith was being a total douche after your book report, you had looked so nervous and he juts kept making little satanic digs, I thought Eddie was gonna kill him and then what did you say ?â
âI said careful Jimmy, your crush on my boyfriend is showing and he really likes to sacrifice virgins.â
âYouâre tipsy, not drunk. Not yet but you almost crack a smile at that memory, you remembered that day so well. Eddie had been in awe of you, you remember how you didnât even make it out of the parking lot after school before he had dragged you in the back of his van and showed you his appreciation.
That twist of heartbreak is felt again.
âYou know you always tell me these stories of back when we were at school together but how do you remember ?â
He frowns in puzzlement as he sips his rum and coke. âWhat do you mean ?â
âYou were the king and I was nobody, pretty much invisible until I became the freaks sacrifice.â
You say in air quotes while rolling your eyes. laughing bitterly at the memories of how awful they all were to him back then but you see Steve is looking down brow furrowed looking serious.
âYouâre kidding right ? You were not nobody. You were not invisible until Eddie. Just you two were so different and nobody understood so you got more attention then. But you were not invisible, definitely not to me anyway.â
The way he looks at you had you taking a sharp breath âwhat are you saying ?â
âI had such a crush on you. I was convinced that you couldnât really want him but then I saw the two of you together, it was kind of unbelievable how much you loved each other. When we got thrown together in all this shit i liked Eddie after hating him for years but you. God you are like no one I have ever met but i resigned myself, it wasnât a thing because you twowere obviously meant to be together.â
This was a shocking revelation to you, and it made you heart speed up in a way you have not felt for so long.
âI have watched him push you away and steal that spark and it is torture and I am so mad at him because all i want to do is show you how you should be treated, how you deserve to be fucking worshipped. I would give anything to be who he used to be to you.â
You are blinking at him in shock as he swallows hard âshit I shouldnât haveâŠâ you put your hand on his arm to stop him, heady with need and he sees it. Runs his hand through your hair before gripping your neck and pulling you to him, kissing you and you let yourself melt into him, you feel like you are on fire. It is needy and wanton, breathing into each others mouths panting and moaning already and he pulls you into to his lap where you roll your hips against him feeling his hard length against you, making you gasp at the long forgotten feeling.
âoh baby you have no idea how long I have been wanting this.â
It is like someone has doused you in freezing cold water. Your mind is back at the lake a different set of lips on yours. The memory had you Pulling back and you wipe your mouth, guilt drowning you
âoh god Steve, i canât.. what are we doing ? I have to leave I am so sorry.â Then you run out as he calls your name as you get in your car screeching away from the kerb.
Letting yourself in quietly, you are hoping he is asleep but as the small lamp is switched on and you see him, in that fucking recliner you are starting to hate you jump slightly. Nerves already jangled
âoh hi, sorry if I woke youâ
His face is hard, lips set in a thin line.
âYou didnât. Where were you ?â
âMovie night remember ? I told you before I left â
He scoffs bitterly then
âI didnât ask what you were doing I asked where you wereâ you stop, stomach dropping as he stares at you jaw set.
âSteveâsâ
He laughs nastily then âand who was at Harringtonâs?â
âWhy are you asking me that ?â
âBecause I talked to Dustin earlier and he knew nothing about it, neither did Mike or Lucas. So I called Robin and guess what, not a fucking clue what I was talking about. So who else other than my girlfriend and Harrington were at this so called movie night ?â
You are wringing your hands together, guilt is slowly being pushed out by your anger
âYour girlfriend ? Is that what I am ?â
He stared you down and you throw your arms up
âme and Steve, just me and Steve ok. I needed to talk to someone. A friend, he is my friend Eddie and yours and he has been worried about meâ
Pulling himself up with difficulty, pain evident on his face but you force yourself to let him do it by himself.
âWorried about you ? Iâm the one who got eaten alive, Iâm the one left like a fucking cripple.â
âAnd I am the one having to deal with it all while you treat me like you hate me. So yeah he is worried about me. At least someone isâ you shout back and he looks like you slapped him .
âdid you fuck him ?â
âWhat ?â You sputter as your cheeks flame and his eyes harden
âDid. You. Fuck. Him ?â
âNoâ
âBut you wanted to right ? King Steve giving you all the attention that the freak wonât. Telling you what an asshole I am, whispering sweet nothings to you. Telling you how wonderful you are, how he could treat you right. How you were always too good for me.â
âStop it Eddie, stop feeling so fucking sorry for yourself. Everyone got hurt, everyone was traumatised. You are the only one that wonât try and move on. Steve has the same fucking injuries as you and heâŠâ
âHe what ? Tell me, tell me how much better he is than me. Admit you wanted to fuck himâ
He screams in your face
âYes, i wanted to fuck him.â You scream just as loud, louder than you have ever been in your life, scream so hard your throat hurts. then silence. the only sounds are your breathing hard and ragged and the deafening of your heartbeat in your ears.
You are staring at him expecting to be met with anger and hatred, asking how could you but instead you are looking at your boy, all soft edges, the bitterness he has held in his features since he came home is gone. He looks bewildered and frightened. Shoulders slumped as he stares around blindly like he will find the words to say written on the walls.
âDo you love him ?â
You sob then, falling to the floor as your legs canât hold the weight of your grief and your guilt anymore.
âNo. I love you. All i have wanted since i was seventeen years old is you. I didnât sleep with him because of you, but you donât want me Eddie, you donât love me. I keep waiting for you to love me again like you did. It is all I want in the world.
He looks at you and the hope you see there almost makes you cave but you donât.
âI love you Eddie, more than i have ever loved anything or anyone, more than i ever will again. But i canât do this anymore, we are making each other miserable. I know you blame me and I am sorry it has made you hate me and I am sorry I have lost you because of it, but I am not sorry I made them bring you back. I wonât ever apologise for not letting you dieâ
Turning away you walk into your bedroom, it was never your shared bedroom because he hadnât slept in here once since you moved in. That chair was his bed, away from you. You packed your small case, not having many possessions here anymore. Most of your stuff was in storage after your parents left town.
To the untrained eye it looked lived in, framed photos of you and Eddie from before ,you took your favourite one, slipping it into the case next to your makeup bag before zipping it up.
he was still sat in the same position when you walked out. He was staring at the stain on the carpet , from where he had thrown the soup you had made him early on in a fit of rage and you had desperately tried to clean it while silent tears fell down your nose.
âWhere are you going ?â
You shake your head âi donât know I need space and so do you. I will let Robin know where I am if there is an emergency.â
Steve hasnât slept a wink. He had fucked up he knew it. Eddie was his friend and you were so screwed up right now. He never should have put you in this situation.
His spiral is interrupted by a banging on his front door. When he looks at the clock to see it is only six am he jumps up, what if it is you and you need him.
Hurriedly making his way downstairs he realises he is wrong when the heavy pounding continues and he hears a deep voice shouting âHarrington open up now.â
Sighing resignedly he pulls the door open and Eddie storms past him a scowl on his face.
âYou son of a bitch I should have known.â
âEddie waitâ
âNo Steve you donât get to talk right now. I knew it, when I gave you the speech in the upside down and told you you needed to get Nancy back, told her she was still in love with you. I saw how uncomfortable you got and where your eyes went, who you looked at but I let it go. Because I honestly thought you were a good guy and you respected the fact that she is my girlfriend you asshole.â
Steve scoffed and paced away hands on his hips before he walks back to him.
âAt the time I did respect that. Because at that time you deserved her. But you donât anymore, now you are the asshole Eddie. She is miserable and hurt and it is all because of you. So yeah I kissed her and I want her because right now. I am the better man for her.â
Crack
Steve stumbles back after Eddie punches him, he is stood over him fists clenched tightly by his sides, breathing hard but as Steve sits up he watches Eddieâs shoulder sag in defeat until he is sat on the floor next to him and he starts to cry
âI know I donât deserve her. I am so angry at what my life is and it is easy to blame her. I donât-I donât know how to be with her anymore, I canât let her love me.â
You had spent three days in a motel while you worked out what to do. Had called Robin to tell her you were alive but needed space.
The morning you had decided on your next step and there was a knock at the door. Steve stood on the other side looking sad and uncomfortable
âHiâ
âHiâyou say fidgeting with your sleeves and he strokes your cheek as a tear falls down. When you look up you see the bruise under his eye and frown
âI deserved itâ
You shake your head in shock âEddie ?â
He nods âI told him a few home truths, I also told him how I felt about you and that as much as I loved him. He doesnât deserve you.â
Your eyes flick in panic and he laughs softly âI know you donât feel the same way. Pretty hung up on him huh ?â
You nod sadly âcome in Steve. We should talk
After Steve leaves you shower and pack your bag and take the six mile drive back to the trailer and knock on the door.
Your heart aches at how bad he looks, his hair is even wilder than usual, dark circles under his eyes and a down turned mouth.
âWhere were you ?â
âMotel just outside of town off the freeway.â
âThought Harrington could splurge for better than thatâ
âI wasnât with him, you know that. You hit himâ
He shrugs sheepishly âhe deserved it â
âHe agreesâ
âSo youâre not with him then ? He made it pretty clear thatâs what he wanted. Not many girls turn him down.â
You shake your head sadly.
âNo. It was never about him. He just made me feel wanted and i donât know like I was a person worth having around. But I knew how he made me feel is what I want, it was just the wrong boy making me feel like that.â
Reaching forward he tentatively takes your hand in his.
âSo now what ?â
âI am leaving Hawkins. There is nothing here for me now. There was only one reason I stayed when I graduated.
I have set up that nurse the government guys said they would pay for and you have Wayne and the kids and Steve, he is your friend and he cares about you. They all do. Let them. Let them love you Eddie.â
âWhen are you coming home ?â He asks through his tears and you shake your head smiling at him sadly as your own tears are flowing now and realisation hits him like a ton of bricks.
âYouâre not coming backâ
It is a statement not a question and it breaks your heart how devastated he sounds. Why now does he show that he cares, all you want is to tell him you will stay but it is too late.
âNo. I hopeâŠ.â
What did you hope ?
ââŠ..I hope you can be happy again, find you again. Because Eddie Munson is too special to be lost to all this grief.
My Eddie.â your voice broke on that line a sad smile through the tears and his eyes met yours tears streaming down his own face. .
âHe is the best boy i know.â














