[text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you?
[To: Ryan] Excuse me? I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.

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hello vonnie
dirt enthusiast
almost home

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Today's Document
NASA
trying on a metaphor

Love Begins

izzy's playlists!
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Jules of Nature

@theartofmadeline

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Sade Olutola
KIROKAZE
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Xuebing Du

#extradirty
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@mjcnes-blog
[text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you?
[To: Ryan] Excuse me? I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.
more texts for you bitches
ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life. [text] I should have never let you back into my life. [text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that. [text] Please don’t walk away. [text] Please don’t do this. [text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you? [text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it. [text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again. [text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong. [text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me. [text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did [text] The truth is I’m not over you. [text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you. [text] I’m seeing someone else. [text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker? [text] You’re so selfish. [text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them]. [text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACE
LOVING TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah. [text] Be careful. [text] I’m only saying it because I love you. [text] I’m only saying it because I care about you. [text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee. [text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week? [text] Let me take you out, please? [text] Let me make you dinner tonight. [text] I want you to be happy. [text] You’re always safe with me. [text] I can’t stop thinking about you. [text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you. [text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that. [text] It was so good seeing you. [text] You don’t need this shit. [text] I’ll be there in five minutes. [text] Let me help, please? [text] You’re important to me. [text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that. [text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day. [text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love. [text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now. [text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut. [text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!? [text] Lose my number, asshole. [text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so. [text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf. [text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend. [text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is. [text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it? [text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole. [text] Go fuck yourself. [text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you? [text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first. [text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now [text] Bye and have a very fuck you day
SEXY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this. [text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair. [text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor. [text] Come over. With condoms. [text] You should come over, clothing optional. [text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT [text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life [text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous? [text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended. [text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together [text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis. [text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology. [text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH. [text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking? [text] I just need some of your time and all of your body. [text] I am available for nakedness [text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
DRUNK TEXTS, BITCH
[drunk text] So wat are you really over me no w [drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH [drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever [drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known [drunk text] I’m eating macaroni and cheese on a slice of pizza and autocorrect just wrote that text for me pretty much, what’s your night like [drunk text] Listen up slut, you’re one hot piece of ass and if [he/she/they] doesn’t realize it, it’s their loss [drunk text] but what’s the point of a Disney sing off party if you’re not here. You have to be be the Pumbaa to my Timon [drunk text] Can you pls remind me tomorrow of how much of a fool I made myself tonight [drunk text] FUCK YOU YOU’RE GORGEOUS [drunk text] I think maybe you and me should like go out and eat pizza or something check yes or no [drunk text] Please don’t hate me I’m too tired and too dizzy to be hated [drunk text] I hate (him/her) but less when I’m drinking. Thanks, alcohol. [drunk text] Omf g you need to get over here now I think I’m dyin [drunk text] SWEEEEEEEET CAROLINE
☄ ; ^ )
☄ Leaning your head on their shoulder while they talk
Michael wasn’t big on public displays of affection, even when they were supposedly platonic, but he was much more open about it behind closed doors. It was still something he tried to keep in check though; he swore almost everyone else he had a little crush going over Lindsay, but she apparently had no idea. They were such good friends that he didn’t really want to make her uncomfortable, though. He didn’t plan on putting his feelings out there
It was too easy, too comfortable being around her. Even while hanging out on the couch, watching crappy TV while chatting and laughing. It felt as easy as breathing to just relax like this late into the night. He was a little tired, but he didn’t want to go to bed.
Lindsay’s shoulder seemed like a good idea.
She was still talking when he shifted, head tilting to the side so he could rest it against her shoulder. Michael exhaled a soft little puff of breath, relaxing further. They were close enough that it wasn’t out of the ordinary to be physically affectionate, but this was just... really nice.
Acts of Affection
rockinrpmemes.
Send in a symbol from YOUR muse to see how MY muse will react to yours! For the ones where YOUR muse gives or says something to mine: WILD CARD! Your muse can pick the item, sings a specific song, or says a specific thing!
Family/Platonic:
✩ Grooming, brushing, or tending to their hair.
✪ Rubbing their back after a stressful day or disappointment.
★ Cooking them their favorite meal and feeding them.
✬ Making them their favorite hot beverage.
☼ Cuddling on the sofa next to each other.
☀ Singing them to sleep.
☆ Getting them something they need before they ask for it.
☄ Leaning your head on their shoulder while they talk.
✥ Play fighting!
❃ Mussing their hair or tugging at their clothes (a hat, sleeve, etc.)
Shipping/Romance:
♥ Laying by their side and watching them while they sleep with a fond smile.
♡ Kissing the corner of their eyes.
❥ Running your hand over their arm and gently pulling them close.
❤ Whispering sweet nothings in their ear.
❦ Holding hands and nuzzling somewhere ambient and low-lit.
❣ Staring deep into their eyes with adoration.
ღ Rubbing your leg against theirs under the table.
ℒ Pulling them into a hall/alley to kiss them passionately.
£ Brushing your hand over or gently squeezing their bum.
Ω Running a hand over their collar bone or décolleté.
Sexual/NSFW:
✖ Soft nips at the neck and shoulder line.
✗ Bathing, washing, or soaking together quietly after sex.
♦ Body worshipping their naked form, slowly.
✚ Painting honey dust, edible paint, or other soft brush strokes on their body.
✦ Giving a sensual massage.
♢ Straddling their lap and holding their face to yours for a deep kiss.
▲ Dressing them up in lingerie (or gear) with gentle attention.
▽ Running your hand between their thighs, and splitting their legs apart.
► Unzipping their clothes free and kissing their neck.
The signs after throwing shade
*Sips Tea* (indirect shade/sneak dissing): Virgo, Gemini, Capricorn, Aries
*Sips Vodka* (blunt shade/talking shit): Scorpio, Leo, Sagittarius, Libra
*Sips Capri Sun* (tries being rude but still cute): Pisces, Cancer, Aquarius, Taurus
first date starters
Send me one to see how my muse reacts. Feel free to alter to fit muses.
“Would you like to come in for a nightcap?”
“I don’t sleep with someone on the first date.”
“I promise, I have a better track record than this.”
“I don’t normally do blind dates, but [name] spoke very highly of you!”
“This is my favorite place for first dates.”
“So – do you want to get together again sometime soon?”
“I’m not looking for anything serious.”
“I don’t want the night to end.”
“I think it’s best if we’re upfront about what we want right now.”
“Wow, you don’t look anything like your picture online.”
“It’s so great to finally meet you in person!”
“I should probably tell you that I just got out of a long-term relationship.”
“Want to come upstairs?”
“I can walk you home, if you like.”
“Walk me home?”
“Let’s go dancing!”
“Yeah, I don’t think we should do this again.”
“This was fun and all, but I don’t see us working out.”
“That movie sucked!”
“I wasn’t sure you’d come.”
“I was starting to think you’d stood me up.”
“I’m done screwing around. I want a real relationship.”
“It’s too early to call, but I have a good feeling about this.”
“Let me get the check.”
“Want to split the check?”
“It’s nothing personal, I just don’t think we fit.”
“This was the worst date of my life.”
“Don’t call me again.”
“Oh, God, my ex is here.”
“That wasn’t exactly how I imagined our first date going.”
“This was nice. Just a simple, sweet first date.”
“What, no good night kiss?”
“Want to play a game? Twenty Questions, or something?”
“Trust me – don’t want to go there.”
“We probably shouldn’t go there. My ex hangs out there sometimes and I think seeing them would kind of kill the mood.”
“I don’t date much, to be honest.”
“I hate to come on too strong, but I really, really like you.”
“Can I kiss you?”
“Why do you even like me? Is it the money?”
“Look, I gotta be honest – you were rude to the waiter, and that’s a serious turn-off.”
“Whoa! That’s off-limits until, like, the tenth date.”
“Wow, you come on strong, don’t you?”
“I’m not making the greatest impression right now, am I?”
“Have you ever been here before?”
“I’ve never been here before!”
“I don’t normally meet up with people from Tinder/Grindr/OkCupid.”
“Where do you see yourself in five years?”
“That’s it! I’m leaving!”
“Hey! You’re on this date with me, remember?”
“I like you, but I think you’re hung up on your ex.”
“You haven’t let me get a word in edgewise all night!”
“Are you always this shy?”
“So, what do you do for a living?”
“Why did you even agree to go out with me?”
“I think I’m in love with you.”
and there is not a single place that i would rather be i’m fucked up just like you are and you’re fucked up just like me
alignment: chaotic bisexual
Reblog this if I have permission to come into your askbox IC at any point if my muse has a question for yours.
“No, no, no, not with the face. Stop.”
♥♥ @mjcnes ♥♥ Road to El Dorado ♥♥
She’s clutching the box for Mario Party, assorted Wii remotes dangling from her wrist by the straps– because Mica’s not a careless asshole like Michael –&& she’s definitely pulling a face that’s been known to bend people to her will before. She doesn’t feel a single bit guilty about using it on Michael if it means she gets to have her fun.
Brown eyes are shining with a desperate want && lips are curled into a barely discernible pout, her features working to make him feel guilty. ❝ I’m not pulling a face, I just really wanted to play Mario Party ❞ && if the eyes aren’t enough, the disappointment Mica mixes into her ‘whatever’ tone should really guilt him into playing.
Michael liked Mario Party as much as the next guy - in fact, he probably liked it much more than the next guy, given how much time he’d put into the damn game and how good he was at it. Playing it was a time investment though, one that needed some mental preparation, and Michael had certainly not prepared himself for it today.
“It’s great, but you’re definitely pulling a face.” His tone was no nonsense mixed with just a hint of a giggle he was clearly trying to hide. “Why d’you wanna play it so bad right now?”
stupxfied:
Gavin just went quiet for another few moments. He didn’t want him to leave, either– maybe he wouldn’t come back. Maybe he was lying just to make him feel better, he wasn’t actually going to come back. He’d not exactly welcomed him with open arms today, anyways. And this made him fear Mikey coming back in a hallucination again– he said he’d be back, so he came back.
He’d have to talk to his therapist later. Maybe up the dosage of his medication.
“ You promise? ” He said anyways. It was a bad idea– a promise. It’d only put him in deeper. He should have just left it alone– but he’s Gavin. He can’t. And he finally had some damn hope for the first time in god knows how long. “ I–It’ll be great. It’s supposed to be really pretty. ”
“I promise.”
It was easy to make the promise when Mikey didn’t know the significance of it to Gavin. Hell, Mikey probably would have made the promise anyway - after all, he 100% intended to come back tomorrow. He was determined that he wouldn’t vanish on Gavin again. If he had to go anywhere, he was going to give him some warning.
He offered Gavin his hand, ready to shake on that promise. Maybe some physical contact would help reassure Gavin that this was all real, all as it should be.
“I swear, Gav.”
stupxfied:
“ Yeah, that wouldn’t be good. Dogs get real fuckin’ sad when you leave. I’d– if I was still in the business, I’d have to train him and take him with me. Like– like if I was you, and I got to be in an office all the time– I’d put like. A pee pad in there, and lots of dog toys. I’d make him hide under the desk when people walked in. ”
He probably talked a little bit too much about this stuff– but maybe it was because he just thought about it all the time. Not much else to think about in here. He could read, maybe that’d help. But the last time he tried that he just got little flashbacks of things that he’d done– and he hated it. And he really just didn’t want to think about it.
“ Good. ” He lets out a soft breath– it was good to hear that. He didn’t want to be left again– the last time he left, he just wasn’t good. And he was afraid that if he left again, it’d just happen all over again. And he didn’t want that. “ I– Um– Visiting hours are almost over. But there’s more tomorrow. Maybe– maybe you coud take me outside. I’ve not been outside yet. ”
“Yeah. It’s why I've only thought about it.” Mikey wasn’t even sure what breed of dog he would get. Probably something big and mean looking, but it would actually be a sweetheart. It sounded like a good match for him. A bark louder than its bite.
Mikey didn’t want to leave either. Even though things were tense and uncertain, it was so damn good to see Gavin again. Yeah, it was kind of his fault that the radio silence had been going on for so long, but Mikey blamed MI6 more than himself. It was them who had pulled him away from his charge with no warning; Mikey hadn’t exactly volunteered himself.
He sighed, resting his chin in his hand with a distasteful little twist of his lips. “I don’t wanna go,” he admitted aloud. “But tomorrow, mate, if you wanna go outside, we can. We’ll go for a walk or something.”
6, 10, 21
Headcanon Questions // Accepting!
6. What holiday is their favourite? Which is their least favourite?
Okay to be honest, Michael loves a chance to gather with family and friends, so he’s big on Christmas. He doesn’t really have a least favourite. He might complain about them or the effort he needs to put in decorating for some of them, but he likes occasions.
10. Do they eat breakfast? What’s a typical breakfast look like for them?
He definitely makes it a point to eat breakfast every morning. You gotta when you’re trying to be healthy and work out, whatever the AU. Usually though, it’s like a bit of fruit if he’s feeling lazy or toast or something. He won’t make it a big deal to cook something.
21. What were they a part of in college/high school, if they went? Were they a part of any clubs, did they play any sports? What clique would they have been considered a part of?
He’s not a big sports fan and he didn’t like the idea of joining a club either. Mostly, he was just a loner with his small group of friends.
different headcanon questions!!
1. What are three Netflix shows that they’ve rated five stars? 2. Where do they prefer to read? On the sofa, in bed, at a table, on the porch, in a cafe? 3. Do they like to play games? What kind of games: video, card, board? What are some of their favorites? 4. What’s their food weakness? What food can they never turn down? 5. Do they prefer movies or TV shows? Why? 6. What holiday is their favorite? Which is their least favorite? 7. What’s their diet like? Are they vegetarian, vegan? Do they have any food allergies that make them have a special diet? 8. What sort of toys did they play with as a child? 9. How often do they go grocery shopping? Do they tend to do one large trip, or smaller ones throughout the week? 10. Do they eat breakfast? What’s a typical breakfast look like for them? 11. Do they like going to museums? What type of museums do they like to go to? Art, science, historical; interactive, quiet, a mix? 12. How do they organize their books? Alphabetical by author, by title? By size, color, date published? Is there any rhyme or reason? 13. Have they ever been do Disney World/Land, or any other amusement park? What do they prefer to do at them: go on the rides, play the games, eat the food? 14. How do they eat their popcorn? What do they put on it? 15. When do they pay their bills? As soon as the bill comes in? At the last moment? Or are most of their bills automatically taken out of their account? 16. What time do they normally go to bed? How many hours of sleep do they usually need to function in the morning? 17. Do they have cable, or do they rely mostly on Netflix, Hulu, and other streaming services? 18. What is their preferred weather? What would be a perfect weather day? 19. Are they more of a snacker throughout the day, or they eat three meals and call it a day? 20. Have they ever had an imaginary friend? 21. What were they a part of in high school/college, if they went? Were they a part of any clubs, did they play any sports? What clique would they have been considered a part of? 22. Do they have a favorite restaurant? How often do they go to it, and what’s their usual order? 23. How do they prefer to watch movies? In the theater, on a streaming site, from an owned DVD/digital download, rented from somewhere? 24. Do they watch any sports? What are they a fan of, and what teams do they root for? Do they watch the games/matches on TV or do they try to be there for some in person? Do they just catch the highlights on their phone later on? 25. What do they prefer to do in the summertime? Do they like going to the beach, do they prefer camping, staying in the city? Do they like to stay indoors and away from the heat?
stupxfied:
“ I wanna sleep in the grass, ” he told the other, closing his eyes and leaning his head back. It’s not like he wasn’t allowed to go outside. He just didn’t. It seemed forced– like it was all fake. He wanted real. He wanted nature at it’s finest– and a ranch seemed like a good place for that. “ God, it’s been awhile since I’ve even smelled grass. ”
He smiled then, before opening his eyes to look at Mikey again. This was good. He felt good, and he was pretty sure this was going to be a good thing for him. Both the ranch, and having Mikey back. “ You’d still come and visit me there, yeah? I dunno how long I’d stay– he’d probably kick me out eventually. And I wanna get back to work– any work. So it’d be okay. ”
“ I wanna get a cat. I think. Or a dog– like– one of those emotional support animals or whatever. Especially when I leave, because I probably won’t be able to take a cow with me. ”
It was such a soft, sweet want that it made Mikey’s heart ache a little bit. It was so good to finally just... talk to Gavin, even if things had changed so much. He almost offered to let Gavin stay with him if Ryan did ever kick him out, but he wasn’t sure how well that would go, considering the circumstances. For now, Mikey decided to hold onto that question, and maybe he’d ask a little later down the line of Gavin’s recovery.
“I’ve thought about getting a dog,” he admitted. “Kinda want to someday, when I’m not runnin’ around with spy shit, you know?” It wouldn’t be fair to it when he had so little time to spend with it. Mikey would wait until he was done with that life before he settled down with a pet.
He ducked his head, a softer smile tugging on his lips. “Of course I’d visit you, mate. Whole point of me comin’ here was to see my best mate again, I’m not gonna just run off after this.”
many of you probably don’t know this, but @pastelprinceling and i have been trying to move down to fresno for about a year now. the original plan was to go some time in the fall of this year but due to rapidly decreasing mental states and even worse living conditions, we’re trying to move as soon as possible. of course, that only means everything in the world is working against us but that figures. currently, we need to pay to fly prince and his things out to california[~200] and we need the deposit for the apartment[500] and the rather steep fee for animals[600] [i have two older cats and them coming with me is non negotiable] while we currently have enough saved up to pay for most of it, we also need a cushion so once we’re there we have time to find jobs [i have several offers for interviews that i currently can’t take due to it being a three hour trip and my grandmother now needs constant fucking attention]
prince and i are both trans people living in very poor situations [prince currently lives in texas and i, some fucking how, live in the reddest part of california in addition to both of us currently living with very abusive people] and diminishing mental wellness is an extreme concern so
if you’d like and are able, we’d really appreciate a few helping hands. even a little bit helps right now. you can donate to my paypal.me [please don’t use kofi] here which would be best for us at the moment. hopefully we can make it past this quick and get back to doing what you all love to see us do
im calling the police @gavinospoopy