Catch Me, I'm Falling

Personal blog. 18+.

[monotonee-roses]

Previously monotone-roses, got shut down

They/them, 32, mentally ill

DNI: minors, endos, transphobes, maga, etc

[monotonee-roses]

All I do is need and want and take and take and take

I am a selfish creature

I am a broken vase begging for more water but it always spills right back out and I can't fix it I can't fix it

Please just let me die

[brian4rmthe6]

[monotonee-roses]

Trying not to bang my head against a wall because no one is replying !!!! Pay attention to me !!!!!!!

Wow I am insufferable

[monotonee-roses]

[grimreaperman]

[hannahinspace]

[monotonee-roses]

I am screaming and no one can hear me

I AM SCREAMING AND NO ONE CAN HEAR ME‼️❕

[monotonee-roses]

I feel like I'm kind of psychotic rn and I just want to push it further because I'm a masochist and at the end of the day I will always return to the familiarity of the void

[paper-wounds]

[hel7l7]

Guess this will hurt for a while

[elzuuur]

I need a bullet in my head right now

[monotonee-roses]

Sometimes I poke my bruises to feel the good ouchies

And sometimes it's because I deserve to fucking hurt

[monotonee-roses]

People I don't talk to anymore

C: you let me dream about a life with you where the stars led us back together. Then suddenly backed out and ran like a frightened rabbit. I was never a threat to you, and I don't understand why you didn't remember my scent and know you were safe

S and M: they were dating each other as well. It was the first time I was part of a polycule. I was so happy to find a family. one of them got the ick from a miscommunication and the other had to side with her and I still don't understand what I did wrong. it was so sudden and I thought they liked me and she told me not to reach out to her again and I don't know what I did wrong

D: suddenly deactivated her discord during a deep depression, I panicked and hunted her down via her known usernames and found her. She said she was okay and barely spoke to me. I tried many times to check in and offer support. She never replied. The next time I checked she deactivated that one too. I threw away all the things she mailed me, back when we were close. it feels like a lifetime ago.

ER: I took her on a personalized date that we both had a blast at, and she ghosted me. I gave up and blocked her. A little while later I caved and reached out, and she replied at first that she was still interested, and then ghosted again. I blocked her again. This is why I don't look back.

F: I've admired and looked up to you since we met years ago. I've been there for you as much as I can. I know you're focused on healing yourself right now, but I want to be here for you. And I want you to miss me too. I turn to you for advice because I wish I was as strong as you. I'm sorry I wasn't worth your time back.

ES: I don't understand how you fell out of love with me. It was so beautiful. It could have been so beautiful. I begged you not to let me be too much. I warned you and I begged you. And you let it happen until you resented me and now you are a stranger and I can't remember what it felt like in your arms anymore and I am too wounded to lay in anyone else's arms without it burning me alive

[braaainwaaash]

[orlandoinfarbe]

[monotonee-roses]