deductions, smiley faces, string @mrshudsonswall - Tumblr Blog

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Fandom: Sherlock (TV), Life on Mars (UK)

This is not his London. Of course it’s not. In his London, the air smells of the underground, fast food, and damp air. Here the upper strata of the air he breathes are filled with wisps of industrial coal smoke and pungent hits of heady, leaded fuel.

#bbc sherlock #sherlock #life on mars #sherlock holmes #john watson #gene hunt #sam tyler

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Sherlock (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Sherlock Holmes & John Watson Characters: Sherlock Holmes, John Watson, Mrs. Hudson (Sherlock Holmes) Additional Tags: Sleep, 221B Baker Street, Domestic Fluff Summary:

He’s right. Bloody sleep. If I slept more, I’d know precisely how long it takes for body to resume fully functional state after dormancy, but I do so little of it there’s not enough data... (Must not voice such thoughts to John.)

#fanfic from my baby mind #started in 2012 #edited in between #posted now #who knows when I'll write another chapter but I had fun #sherlock fanfiction #my first fanfic

thebootydiaries

me: hello darkness my old friend

darkness: new phone who dis

vitruvianwatson

I’m just imagining a quiet Christmas day at the Holmes residence, Mummy in the kitchen, stirring the punch, and Papa Holmes sitting at the table reading the paper, making a comment every now and then about something or the other.

Suddenly, there’s a burst of laughter, deep and resonant, from the sitting room, and Mummy nearly drops the spoon because she hasn’t heard her son laugh that way in years, not since he was just a boy. She looks at Mr. Holmes, and he’s looking right back at her, just as perplexed.

“Was that–?” he begins, but Mummy cuts him off with a hasty “Shhhhh!” and tip toes over to the door to investigate. She cracks it open just enough to see through to the next room, and she goes utterly still at the sight before her.

Dr. Watson is seated on the sofa before the crackling fire, a book in one hand while he reads aloud, quietly, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth and a warmth in his eyes she’s never seen before. But that’s not what has her attention; that’s not what’s made her heart stutter in her chest.

Sherlock–her beautiful, reserved boy who for twenty years has not allowed himself to be seen as anything other than hard and unapproachable–is laying sprawled along the length of the sofa, his feet propped up on the worn arm and his head nestled quite comfortably in Dr. Watson’s lap. He’s still smiling, a remnant of his laughter from a moment ago, and his eyes are full of a mischievous twinkle as he looks up into Dr. Watson’s face. Dr. Watson turns a page of the book, and then his free hand returns to where it’s been carding gently through Sherlock’s tangle of curls, his voice soft as he continues to read.

“What is it? What’s going on?”

Mummy starts and turns around to find her husband right behind her, trying to peer into the room as well. At first she isn’t sure why he suddenly looks so blurry until his expression turns to one of concern and he asks, “What’s the matter?”

She shakes her head and takes a deep, steadying breath. “Nothing’s the matter,” she says, and it’s true. “It’s Christmas, and our son is happy.”

#to be fair this is lovely 💕

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys

I'm an American reading your Boris Johnson posts which I think are so interesting and hilarious. I don't know a lot about UK politics and was wondering if you wouldn't mind doing a quick rundown of the Torys and labour parties (mostly bc I want to read your version) but if you don't have the time or inclination I will do my own research! Thank you!

Sure! Okay this is SUPER BRIEF, like I cannot stress enough how brief this is but:

Labour

The red ones. So Labour began in the early 1900s at the point when a lot of workers rights and voting reforms and all that stuff was gathering steam as we moved out of the Industrial Revolution. It was basically a bunch of socialists, trade unionists and others. Then after the last Liberal government in 1923 which was a bit of a disaster, they took over as the main alternative party to the Tories, and have held that position ever since.

Their most notable era was after WW2, where they created a metric fuckton of nationalised infrastructure - the NHS, rail, water, national parks and countryside access rights, etc. At that point there were two generations massively scarred and traumatised by war who had fought for the country, and now wanted the country to take care of them in return. That was the prevailing attitude of the working class of the day, and Labour (PM was Clement Atlee, but the NHS was the brainchild of Welsh boy Aneirin Bevan, he's a good boy is our Nye) cashed in.

Second most notable era, though, was the late 90s - Tony Blair. Our Tony was of Tory stock but changed his mind because he loves Poors. He decided that, to get a Labour government again, the party needed to be more moderate to convince voters, so he should create the more right-leaning New Labour. This has dramatically shrunk the Overton window and moved Labour to the centre-right. It worked - he was the one who took us to war in Iraq, supposedly for those pesky WMD that never seemed to materialise, but like, a few years ago he went on a bland daytime TV chat show and Fern Britton asked him if he'd have done it anyway even without the rumour of WMDs and he said yes. So, uh. There's that. It was all very dramatic, and journalists started demanding to know how this TV presenter had wrung such a confession out of him, and she was like "Well... I don't think anyone had actually asked him before." He’s a full on war criminal, anyway.

And then, recently, we had Jeremy Corbyn in charge. He was remarkable because he's actually a left-of-centre politician, though fairly unremarkable by those standards, but the Overton window is such that everyone promptly accused him of being a communist for saying we should have free internet. In the 2019 General Election he produced a fully-costed manifesto for new public services, and the Tories just said the words "We don't have a magic money tree to pay for all of this, guys, look at our manifesto in which we promise stuff without explaining where the money will come from," and that actually worked because British people are criminally fucking stupid. Meanwhile the Labour party itself hated Corbyn so much it kept trying to ban new members who wanted to vote for him in a really quite dazzling display of corruption. The BBC let a Tory donor publicly announce that Corbyn was an antisemite because he was pro-Palestine, and then that fell into hysteria and became a whole thing on all sides, and then after the General Election he stood down as party leader and Labour promptly kicked him out of the whole party. The whole thing was honestly an absolute fucking shitshow.

Now we have Keir Starmer, ex-lawyer. Sometimes he does okay, but mostly he has all the oppositional abilities of an ice cream wafer.

The Tories

The blue ones. So the Tories are older than Labour by a considerable margin. The original party to have the name (it's Irish and means "outlaw/robber") were a bunch of tedious royalist dickhead Jacobites who wanted to stick with the system of Let The King Rule in the late 1600s, at the point when Let The King Just Be a Figurehead was now the system. In the 1800s they became the Conservatives and Unionists, and then the modern Conservatives around WW1, but oddly and appropriately the Tory nickname has still stuck.

Anyway they are very right-wing, and really rose to power during both world wars. Churchill was a Tory, and he did such wonderful things as sending in the British army against striking Welsh coal miners, and intentionally causing a famine in India during WW2 so the supplies would come to Britain instead. Classy lads. In the 70s/80s Margaret Thatcher took over, and spent her time aggressively undoing all the socialist stuff that Labour did by privatising water, rail, etc, and beginning the sell-off of the NHS. She also decided she hated British working class industry, including the coal mines, and so shut them all down without remotely trying to replace them. This has done untold damage to the working class and poor areas of the UK, chief among them Wales, where two thirds of the working population worked in the mines. We now have areas where unemployment is in the fourth generation, and entire ghost towns in the countryside. Plus, she was BFFs with Reagan, which should tell you all you need to know about the rest of her tenure.

In the modern day, they took over just after the recession under David Cameron, who promptly instigated austerity measures that have dramatically widened the gap between rich and poor and crippled the economy. David Cameron was also revealed to have fucked a pig once while in uni. He held the Brexit referendum to try and convince people to keep him in charge because he thought we’d vote remain, and then when we didn’t, he promptly quit so he wouldn’t be held accountable for the fall out. Theresa May took over and tried to produce a Brexit deal, but couldn’t, because it was literally impossible to get the deal that Brexiteers had promised, so no one liked her offerings. She was voted out via vote of no confidence. Boris Johnson took over and legit tried to force through a No Deal Brexit, which would have destroyed the country but made him a billionaire, and he even tried to shut down Parliament to stop people from blocking him. Fortunately, that was considered illegal, so he had to back down and get a deal.

And he did! It’s way worse than Tessie May’s, but it was, by then, the best option available. Now Brexiteers think he’s a hero who can do no wrong.

And then the pandemic happened, in which he mis-managed it so badly Britain has the second worst death/infection rate in the world, and then... Partygate. And we’re caught up!

Others:

The Liberal Democrats. The yellow ones. The third choice. In theory socially left-wing, financially right-wing, but in practice they’ve been a bunch of tedious power-grabbing turds. Under the leadership of Nick Clegg they entered into a coalition with the Tories and David Cameron a few years back and basically sold out every principle they had, and therefore kind of... provided a buffer against the worst Tory excesses while also enabling other worst Tory excesses, to be honest. No one trusts them anymore, but they are suddenly stealing Tory seats in by-elections throughout the land, because hardcore Tory voters would never go Labour but they MIGHT vote yellow.

Greens. About the only true left wing party available in England specifically, because an English nationalist party (right-wing) is a very different thing to a Celtic nationalist party (left-wing). They have a single MP, I believe, but in areas with a strong following they do have good sway. Primarily environmental, very socialist.

UKIP. Nazis. Only cared about Brexit. Then Brexit happened and it turned out they didn’t actually have a plan for it. They have since lost all their voters, pretty much, it’s very funny. Their leader has never actually managed to get elected to MP.

SNP. The Scottish National Party, and I believe the ruling party in Scotland. They seem tidy enough. Generally left-wing, though not so much about the military, weirdly. Led by Nicola Sturgeon overall (who seems pretty cool, although with the usual politician caveats and also the addendum that I know little about Scottish politics in detail), but their leader in Westminster is Ian Blackford, who has been yelling at Boris Johnson about parties a lot.

Plaid Cymru. The Welsh nationalists! Easily the most left-wing party in Wales - only the Greens really give them any trouble there, and Plaid are actually a little further left. Very socially progressive. They have a fair bit of influence in the Senedd (Welsh Parliament) but are not actually the ruling party. Used to be led by Leanne Woods, who is fab, and was the only person before the last election to tell Nigel Farage on TV that he should be ashamed of himself during a leaders’ debate. Now led by Adam Price, the Westminster leader is Liz Saville Roberts.

DUP. Democratic Unionist Party. A Northern Irish party which, as the name suggests, is pro-Britain and pro-union, very socially conservative. I will not go further into detail here because we really aren’t far from the Troubles (I’m old enough to have grown up with car bombings being a not-uncommon news item) and it’s very, very complicated and I am not Northern Irish, so I’ll leave it there. Currently led by Jeffrey Donaldson.

Sinn Féin. Irish Republican and democratic socialist party, in both Ireland and Northern Ireland, and the opposite number of the DUP; and again, I will leave it there, as I am very much the wrong person to go into those details. In fact they only had one seat fewer than the DUP in the 2017 election, so it’s hotly contested. Generally left leaning I believe, but with some big exceptions like the topic of abortion. Led by Mary Lou McDonald.

There are also a shit ton of others, like, but those are probably the main ones to be honest. But, like America, it’s really a two-horse race in Westminster.

(I should also add that the Celtic nations are all partially devolved to a greater or lesser extent, which adds quite a bit of complexity.)

lunius-art

I understand that there is no audience for bibisi sherlock content in 2022, but this is the egg my mind-chicken pushed out today, so... I fried it up and here it is

fluffbyday-smutbynight

what do you mean there's no audience. this is pure gold

sherlocksmindpalace

I live for this post 😂😂😂

sherlockwatsons

This is- thank you OP. Just… thank you

hidingoutbackstage

i'm curious so tag this with your age and whether you're a person who constantly changes their custom discord status, has it be the same for long stretches of time, or doesn't do a custom discord status

#27 #what the f is a custom discord status #is that like an msn status

bbcsherlock

who are good bbc sherlock bloggers . i’ve caught the sickness again it has been five years and i only know you and tumblr user witch-lock. on my hands and knees crying

#sherlock #bbc sherlock

mickedy

i think everyone should be at least a little bit fixated on a niche video game that came out like 10 years ago and has never been relevant enough to discuss with people you know in real life. for your health

#downhill domination #the adrenaline

darcylindbergh

honestly tjlc ASIDE this show is just such a master class in subtlety and misdirection…sherlock is undeniably soft from the beginning, physically affectionate with hudders, taking care to make sure john eats, giving john money outright, leaves john out or removes john from the flat when there is a potential danger, he’s so gentle with sarah during the rescue, actually he’s pretty nice to sarah overall, his whole job is about helping people, and yet with a dramatic silhouette, a few fast-paced deductions, and a line about a high-functioning sociopath, hundreds of thousands of viewers, even people who consider themselves fans, fall for this ridiculous persona, for the mask sherlock wears to hide his vulnerability, even though we are shown what’s underneath it. people’s eyes just skim right over him, or over john, or over irene adler, or over mary, it’s just. the ability of the show to misdirect the vast majority of its audience and allow the characters to maintain their vulnerability even while showing them the cracks is absolutely stunning.

#depth of characters is all I ever ask for in a show #and that’s why I love sherlock

karolinsstuff

Sometimes I wish I was a part of Sherlock fandom and Tumblr at its peak. Then I remember some of the drama that happened and I am not so sure about that. Then I remember all the hype and the good things that came out of it and for fucks sake, why didn’t I have Tumblr years earlier.

#I liked the time pre-drama #pre-series 3 was amazing #thinking up reichenbach theories and reading all the fic variations #it was incredible to be a part of #so much creativity and cameraderie in the fandom

arkarti

It didn’t take long until the police arrived, and the usual procedure occurred. Back at 221B, Sherlock rubs his hands and starts gathering all the facts they have so far. Meanwhile John had finally time to examine the laptop himself. He didn’t expect that it would be so easy - the laptop wasn’t even password protected and contained some really interesting files. Practically gift wrapped. “So… James Swandale..?” John started. “Oh, I’ve heard of him - skilled jewel thief. Apparently shorter then others, which gives him a huge advantage for breaking into places.” Sherlock finished. John nodded, but was still quiet confused. How did they get into this situation in the first place? Coincidence or a big game for someone? Well, for Sherlock it was a big game that he had to win. John sighed and smirked of the thought. Soon after, the detective had a clue where to start. Swandale had got hold of some plans of a house belonging to some ‘Giles Conover’… < previous | part 4 of my tpg AU | ToBeContinued? click for full view

arkarti

“You coming?” the detective held out a hand. John sighed and looked at the now open door. “Yeah .. well, it’s not the first time we*re breaking in somewhere.” The warehouse was really big and empty - except for the body of the mysterious messenger, which was later identified as Daniel Brennan. Sherlock rushed to the body and quickly deduced some facts about Mr. Brennan but was quiet more occupied with the laptop. Meanwhile the doctor noticed the poisoned dart which the man was shot with. “Sherlock did you see t - ” “Yes, obviously. Busy John - we should take the laptop back to Baker street before Lestrade and his minions arrive. Finally something interesting this week”, he exclaimed. “Right..” John nodded and thought this may become some kind of treasure hunt. …

< previous | part 3 of my tpg AU | next > click for full view of pics

arkarti

After sulking for a while that the “really interesting clients” didn’t choose him in the first place, Sherlock took John’s laptop and tried to trace the emails back. It took him a bit longer - not that he would admit it - but he was eventually able to extract the location. “So Wapping it is?”, John said and pointed at the screen. Sherlock was already excited for the thrill and leaped towards the door. “Come on, grab your coat! We take the tube this time” … < previous | part 2 of my tpg AU | next > click for full view of pics

arkarti

S: Anything interesting in the newspapers yet, John? I’m bored.. J: …*sighs* no, Sherlock. You know, there hasn’t always to be a case or murder to keep you entertained! S: But John.. there hasn’t been an interesting client for an eternity! The last e-mails have just been tiresome attempts of some people to get my attention - dull. J: *mumbles* well, at least you don’t get those odd e-mails..

My next project/ AU series (click for full view) All pages | next ►

fanficmemes

Anybody else got that Evergiven sized writers block

fanficmemes

“Where’s the next chapter?!” Well buddy you’re never gonna guess

fanficmemes

callmebliss

What’s the comic sans trick?

cargopantsman

spellbookbitch

In late high school I started writing all my draft essays in comic sans and it SERIOUSLY DOES HELP. My guess is it's somehow related to the fact that it's a dyslexia friendly font, or it's just Changing How You're Looking At It. Also, sometimes writers block(whether that be for fiction or for academic writing) is just Anxiety(it won't be good enough, you'll get a bad grade, etc) and it's really hard to feel nervous when looking at comic sans. But yes, my friends hate beta-ing my wips bc they're always in comic sans.

purpleplusher

what if after sherlock had bared the whole lifestory of john and asked him to move in with him, instead of being impressed, john actually gets offended af and lashes out on sherlock in full force. like how dare you treat an ex military doctor like that you arrogant sod. but later goes home and finds out that mr. perfect-cheekbones is actually a bloody genius detective which thrills him a bit. so the next day he goes to meet sherlock again who is mad at him too for the recent event but is secretly intrigued with this fine looking army doctor. hence they agree to live together at 221b with a set of thirty nine ground rules to stay out of each other’s business, each of them getting difficult to manage everytime the other breathes around their space like damn

enemies to lovers trope at its best.

kitten-kin

1. Sherlock cannot deduce John unless John asks or gives permission. (Modification: Sherlock can deduce all he wants; just don’t deduce John aloud.) (Clarification: John snapping “what?!” if Sherlock stares too long apparently does not qualify as asking to be deduced.)

2. Sherlock is allowed to play his violin whenever he wishes. (Modification: PLAY, not torture, Sherlock.) Never mind. Make whatever noise you need to. (Addendum: On the VIOLIN, you little shit!)

3. Sherlock’s experiments are not to be touched. (There were maggots, Sherlock!) (They were part of the experiment!)

4. Sherlock’s experiments are not to be spread out all over the god damned flat to be contained to his half of the kitchen, the (SURFACE OF THE, fuck’s sake Sherlock) coffee table, and his bedroom.

5. John’s gun is not to be touched by anyone other than John. (Modification: except in the case of life-saving need.) (Clarification: definition of “touch” to include but not limited to moving by means of another object, grasping while wearing oven mitts, directing another party to touch it, just fucking leave it alone, Sherlock!) (Addendum: Boredom is not life-threatening, Sherlock.) (Addendum: Accuracy of “life-saving need” to be judged by John.)

6. If Sherlock fails to clean up after his experiments are concluded, he must also take on the washing-up after John cooks for one week. seven days, not necessarily consecutive if there is a case on. the next seven instances that John cooks. (There, let’s see you weasel out of that!)

7. John’s clothing items are off-limits when it comes to Sherlock’s experiments. (But the science, John!) (NO EXCEPTIONS, SHERLOCK.)

8. Sherlock’s sock index is to be treated with respect. (Oh that’s rich! You still owe me three jumpers.)

9. Sherlock is not to run off after serial killers without letting John know. (I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WRITE SHIT LIKE THIS DOWN SHERLOCK)

10. John will do the laundry, but Sherlock must separate his clothes into the proper piles if he wants the sanctity of his dry-clean-only garments to be respected.

11. The top shelf of the refrigerator is for food only. (Clarification: “Food” means food we intend to consume ourselves, Sherlock.) (Clarification #2: “Food” meaning food I, John Watson, intend to consume willingly.)

12. Whoever drinks the last of the milk must buy a fresh carton. (Leaving one teaspoon of milk in the carton does not count, you tit!)

13. No smoking in the flat, and no more than two nicotine patches at a time. Doctor’s orders.

14. Sherlock is not to pester John to bring home biohazardous materials, medical supplies, confidential patient history, or anything else from the office. (What is the point of you working at that place then, John?)

15. Sherlock is not to show up unannounced at John’s office. (Addendum: Even with an appointment because you CLEARLY didn’t need medical attention.) (Addendum: Sherlock is not to purposely injure himself so as to require medical attention!)

16. John is not to date boring women. (Oi.) (The definition of “boring” to be determined by Sherlock.) (NO!)

17. Sherlock is not to interrupt John’s dates. (Modification: Unless they’re with boring women.) (NO!) (Modification: Unless it’s for a case.) (Modification #2: An IMPORTANT case, Sherlock!) (Clarification: An important ACTIVE case, not a interesting cold one! And urgently needed, not just you wanting me to hand you a pen from the other side of the room!)

18. Sherlock is not to set his text alert notification sounds to anything publicly indecent. (You’re the only one who hears them. What does it matter whether they’re fit for the public or not?) (Just change it, Sherlock.) (I would have thought you’d enjoy the noise, judging from the videos you’ve got saved on your laptop.) (SEE #19.)

19. SHERLOCK IS NOT TO HACK INTO JOHN’S LAPTOP.

20. Sherlock is not to use John’s laptop, even when it’s unlocked and left lying about. (Modification: It maybe used with permission.) (Addendum: For case-related purposes only; no snooping.) (Addendum: It’s still snooping even if it doesn’t take much effort, you wanker!)

21. John is not to offer up his life in exchange for Sherlock’s. (Try and stop me.) (I had a plan, John, and your ill-timed and poorly thought through heroics could have very well ruined them!) (Yeah well see rule #22 then!)

22. Sherlock is not to make and implement plans which carry significant risk to himself and/or John Watson without letting John in on them. (You wear your emotions on your face, John; you’ll give the game away.) (Deal with it or deal with ME.)

23. John Watson is never to buy herbal tea again no matter how passionately a deep discount calls out to his frugal soul. (Yeah, fine, this one’s on me.)

24. John Watson is not to go running off after criminals by himself. (He was getting away and you’d twisted your ankle!) (You give me this or you forfeit #22.) (Fine.)

25. NO SHOOTING THE WALLS.

26. Sherlock is not to invade John’s privacy by digging into such items as John chooses not to share, regardless of whether or not it’s a matter of public record. (What if I don’t tell you that I’ve found out? Like the deduction modification?) (NO, you nosy parker.)

27. If you ever drug me again you twat I’ll leave. (More a threat than a rule, isn’t it John?) (Get bent.)

28. Don’t die. (I’m sorry.) I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO RE-EMPHASIZE THIS! DON’T. DIE.

29. Don’t you ever leave me out of something like that again, and I don’t care if it’s to mitigate risk to me; rule #22 is to be respected. - J

30. Never grow a moustache again. - SH (I didn’t shave it for you.)

31. John Watson is not to move out of 221b ever again. (Modification: Unless we both move.)

32. We both agree to work on expressing our thoughts and feelings a bit more clearly to each other, in the interest of less wasted time. (Agreed.)

33. No public snogging. groping. sex. (This isn’t a challenge list!) penetrative sex. flagrant nudity. (There, I’m sticking by this one.) You win.

34. You will marry me on the 29th of January. (I was the one who proposed. I’m hardly likely to need this posted up as a rule to abide by, am I?) (I’m not taking any chances.)

35. You will love me until death. (See rule 34, darling.) (Having it posted up reassures me.)

36. Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. (Stop crossing it out, Sherlock.) Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. (Make me.) Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. Mycroft will be invited to our ceremony. Mycroft has been invited to our ceremony and there’s nothing you can do about it now.

37. John must be very patient with me. (And what have I been doing all these years?) (A very good job.)

38. Neither of us will ever bring up the topics of divorce or separation ever again, even in jest or during a heated argument. (I’m sorry.) (I am too.)

39. Don’t ever leave me. (I promise.)

fluffbyday-smutbynight

so uhm @kitten-kin - i loved this so much that i made… a thing.

(open in a new tab for high res)