Hi! This is my first fix in like ten years or so, but just thought Iād share :)
āāāāāāāā-
The smoke burns your throat as you inhale, the heat an all familiar feeling. Your lungs burn as the smoke engulfs you, body and soul.
āCare to share, sweetheart?ā The voice next to you is muffled. You glance at the paper rolled between your fingers before giving in to his request. Fingers brush, but the chills it gives you are chalked up to the breeze. A light flickers next to you, but you donāt dare look. It would be far too risky, too intimate.
āSo, as I was saying.ā He begins talking about his newest campaign again.
Itās easy to tune out, your focus on sweetheart, a nickname only reserved for his guitar. A nickname he had called you twice now. A nickname thatās making you weak at the knees.
You and Eddie started simply, a drug deal here or there. Pretty soon, you were allowed to pick up from his trailer instead of going all the way to the woods behind Hawkins High. Then there was the time you asked him to show you how to hit from a bong. Eventually the smoke sessions started, then you became the best of friends.
Friends. You shivered. Eddie must have noticed because he quieted.
āDo you wanna head back?ā He looks at you, finally making eye contact, and itās all a bit much.
āUm, yeah,ā you push the hair behind your ear. But you didnāt want to head back, not really. Not when heās looking at you with doe eyes and a bush across his face.
He suddenly stands up and offers you a hand. Cold fingers press against yours for a fleeting moment, just long enough for you to catch your balance.
The walk back to his van is quiet, nearly silent. Eddie has tried to say something three times now, but youāre too consumed by your thoughts to notice. He finally stops dead in his tracks, kicking up some dirt in the process. You jolt back to reality.
āDo you want to come back to mine, watch a movie? Unless I pissed you off somehow, which I definitely didnāt mean if I did, I just-ā
āIād like that,ā you say far quieter than you intended to. āLetās do that,ā more sure of yourself. You continue walking down the path praying that he canāt see right through you.
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
āWhich horror classic should we watch tonight?ā You plop onto his couch.
āIām thinking we watch Nightmare on Elm Street.ā
Fuck. The two of you have watched this movie so many times itād be impossible to distract you from the butterflies in your stomach. Eddie knew that, probably did it on purpose. He always had a way of knowing when there was something going on, even if he couldnāt guess what it was.
āWhatās on your mind?ā Gentle. Always so gentle.
āItās nothing, really,ā rushes out. Nothing at all, especially not that you have a crush on your best friend. That would be ridiculous.
āCome on, (y/n). I can tell when youāre upset, give me some credit,ā he pleads with you.
āReally, Iām just cold!ā
This wasnāt really a lie. Despite it being spring, there was still a chill in the air. Eddie didnāt hesitate, of course, running to his room to fetch his comforter. So the two of you sat there under the old blanket. You watched the movie youād seen a million times with the boy next to you almost falling asleep.
Itās not until he puts an arm around you that you finally calm down. Despite being the source of your turmoil, he always managed to ease your worry. Things used to be so simple between the two of you. Before you noticed how his eyes shined, before you noticed how he smiled around you, before sweetheart.
Itās nearly 3 AM by the time he moves.
āEds, I should go back to my apartment itās late.ā
āAlways have to cut the fun short,ā his smile is on full blast. āIāll drive you come on.ā
Youāre not sure what to do with his full attention. You ready to fold the blanket, but he tears it from your grip and lightly shoves you towards the door. He grabs your keys off the counter and dangles them just out of your reach.
āTell you what (y/n/n). If you can manage to get your keys Iāll let you leave,ā he shoots a wink at you and you flush.
One jump, two jumps, three jumps later youāre out of breath and unsuccessful. Heās cackling like an idiot, but you know how to push his buttons just like he can push yours.
āPlease Eds, I wanna go home,ā you push your bottom lip out and look at him through your lashes.
āGotta try harder than that,ā his rings glitter in the light as he shakes the keys for emphasis.
āEddie, come on, you know I have a shift tomorrow.ā
āFine letās go dork.ā He sighs. āBy the way, Iāve got a party to go to tomorrow night. Iāll pick you up at 8.ā
He sends another wink, and you canāt say no.
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
Your shift at the local coffee shop was uneventful. You saw the same regulars, brewed the same coffee, and chatted with the same coworkers. It isnāt that you donāt like them, itās just no one can compare to Eddie. He just has a way about him that makes your walls come crashing down. You know itās a problem, really you do, but there doesnāt seem to be a fix for it.
Once you got home, it was go time. You had your nerves about tonight. Nerves about seeing Eddie again, but this time with the threat of the public. Everyone knows the two of you hang out, but it never stopped the stares or the hushed comments. The word freak ringing in your ears.
But youāre not a freak, and neither is Eddie. Just two kids who have gotten the short end of the stick one too many times. Ones who didnāt have the money, the grades, or the sparkling reputation. But you have a party to get ready for, so no need to dwell on the faults of society.
The next few hours seem to fly by in a fit of clothes, accessories, and hairstyles. Youāve never been particular about the way you look, but something about tonight makes you want to try your best. Before you know it, you hear the tell tale blare of a horn outside your window. You make sure itās his van before running down the stairs.
The drive there is filled with content chit chat. Questions about how your day went, what he got up to, who is going to be at the party. Before long, youāre in a quiet corner of the hostās yard, sitting on a small swinging bench. The table in front of you is littered with beer cans and cigarette filters.
āThis is the worst one youāve rolled yet, (y/n),ā Eddie states, pulling some hair behind his ear. āJust let me teach you how to do it properly.ā
You roll your eyes. āI am doing it properly, thank you very much.ā
āDo you see how skinny this thing is?ā He holds the lopsided joint up to your eyes.
āFine.ā
You situate yourself on the ground between his legs. His arms come around you to pick up a fresh paper and filter. He gently places both in your hands before grabbing the grinder and dumping a considerable amount of green into the center of the paper.
āOkay, just like this,ā he moves your fingers under his, gently shifting the herb to the edge. āNow you want to roll it, make sure itās tight.ā
Youāre not listening any more. His voice is so low and so close to your ear, but you donāt catch a word of it. You relish the feeling of your hand in his, the cold of his rings against your fingers, and his breath hitting the side of your neck. Maybe itās the alcoholās fault, but you donāt move. You stay grounded where you are, barely even breathing.
āHello? Are you listening at all? I thought I was a bad studentā¦ā he chuckles quietly. Unbeknownst to you, he doesnāt want to move either. He could keep you wrapped in his arms all hours of the day.
āYeah, sorry. I got it, you move it and then roll it and then youāre good.ā
āOne more step princess,ā he brings the paper to your mouth. āGotta lick the edge so it stays.ā
Your heart drops into your stomach, but you do as he asks. Youād do anything he asked. You think you hear a faint good girl come from behind you, but you ignore. You have to, or you might lose all self control. Finally, you stand on wobbly legs and return to your seat, the close proximity starting to sober you up.
āYou know,ā he takes the joint between his teeth and plays with the lighter. āThere is one thing Iāve always wanted to try.ā
He inhales with a smirk and a glint in his eyes. He can see right through you, can see how you long for him written all over your face. He leans in close to you and you gasp parting your lips. He takes his chance and blows the smoke directly into your lungs. Your eyes close at the feeling, but you can still feel him grinning. Butterflies swirl with the smoke and you think youāre floating for a fraction of a second. You finally breathe out, not noticing you were holding it in the first place.
āThat wasnāt so bad, was it sweetheart?ā
