halima (AKA siblaime)

digital artist, conlanger, writer cosplaying a productive citizen. conlanging blog: @siblaime

[mwahahalima]

Important: do NOT repost my art outside Tumblr (e.g. on Telegram, Pinterest, etc.) without my knowledge and permission.

Just don’t. It’s great that you had the decency to credit me as the author, I really appreciate that, but still, DON’T. And may you sit on a wet toilet seat after every time you act against this request.

Please shoot me a direct message here or on Discord first, it’s very possible I will agree when asked, but I am not giving an umbrella permission to circulate everything I post. Fanart, not fanart, this fandom, that fandom, doesn’t matter.

intro post

Just call me Halima. I create digital art (occasionally some traditional sketches as well), write original works and fanfiction, and do other things that are impossible to make a living from. That’s what you can expect here. I tag my art as #creative cubbyhole. I am also a bit of a linguistic nerd, but my conlanging/worldbuilding stuff is kept separate on my side blog @siblaime for the sake of order.

Sometimes I write posts in Polish instead of English when I feel like it.

Usually I don’t need tone tags myself but I can use them if they’re a necessity for someone. My message writing “style” is quite flexible.

You can find me as mwahahalima on AO3, there’s a link to my profile below. I am often wandering around various corners of the fandom world, but my current main fandom is Beholder (especially the second game). I’m very much canon-brained, but I like to put the canon in a microwave oven to make it warm and rotated. From time to time I translate other authors’ fics from English or Russian into Polish.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Side note: I am mostly a gen writer and I do not write nor translate graphic smut. If you see anything M-rated among my works/translations, you can blindly assume it must have deserved that for something else even if there are some relationships tagged.

I do NOT do art commissions.

Posting comments is currently restricted because I’m tired of scammers targeting every single drawing I share.

Please no NSFW questions/requests in the question box.

[mwahahalima]

Today I’d like to share something special to me: a binder of collectible cards, mini-posters and stickers I’ve kept under my bookshelf for years.

My Little Pony (G3, I think?), W.I.T.C.H., Winx, Barbie, Disney princesses, Winnie the Pooh, vintage Polish cartoons like “Bolek i Lolek” and “Reksio”. Quite an adorable potpourri.

Some cards and stickers have their date of release printed in the margin — the oldest are from 1998 (older than me and the friends I got them from. They must have passed through many hands before they got into mine :D), the newest are from 2006. Many are undated, though, and all are equally worn-out (as expected from something handled by young kids lol), so it’s hard to guess when exactly I stopped supplying the collection. I think it must’ve happened sometime in the first years of primary school.

I have only vague memories regarding this binder. I would carry it around in my backpack, sit among other girls from my group in preschool during playtime, and we’d chat, exchange the pictures and brag about our coolest findings. Two “normal” cards were equal to one fancy shiny card, from what I remember. “TAK” (yes) or “NIE” (no) was handwritten by me on the back of each sheet to mark whether it was up for exchange or not.

I have no idea what is going on with Hay Lin’s giant ear. It doesn’t look good lmao

Fun fact: I loved MLP as a little girl, but I’ve never been into W.I.T.C.H. and Winx Club lore. Like, not at all. I knew the main characters, knew the general premise of “a team of girls with magical abilities fights some evil powers”, nothing else. I simply liked the aesthetics of these cards and stickers. Shiiiny! hehe

Another fun fact: I’d started this entire collection with a single set of identical sheets. All the cool girls in my preschool had these binders full of pretty pictures, so I wanted one too, but I had no idea where to start — so I convinced my dad to buy me a random W.I.T.C.H.-themed notebook, and I removed the sheets to use them as cards for exchange. As you can see, it worked very well. :P

“I have too many of these. CARD SALE”. My handwriting before I learnt the standard cursive at primary school. Yet another useless fun fact: twenty years later, I still write my Ż’s (or rather Ƶ’s lol) the same way, either with a stroke instead of a dot, or — redundantly — both a stroke and a dot.

Are such collections still a thing? Please let me know. And feel free to share similar stuff in reblogs. x))

[kaflov]

I think Hemnitz may have suffered from misanthropy hating not only the citizens of the Great State but also his fellow South Boreans. His long observation of events had an impact on his attitude even toward his own people. For Hemnitz South Borea was merely a means to an end not something for which he felt any genuine affection.

Ps: My personal take on the character

[mwahahalima]

Given how he wanted to just exterminate everyone around and didn’t give a damn about saving his countryfellows who lived in the Great State, even those who had been brought there by force (like Maria), yeahhh

[catchymemes]

[mwahahalima]

Liczba obserwujących właśnie zrównała mi się z liczbą obserwowanych (przynajmniej tak twierdzi licznik, a liczniki na Tumblrze czasem mają gorsze dni). Cierpliwie blokuję ewidentne spamboty, więc mam nadzieję, że przynajmniej 90% to żywi ludzie. W porównaniu do ruchu na innych blogach to nie jest wcale duża liczba, ale i tak podziwiam, że tyle osób jest w stanie co najmniej tolerować to, co tu wrzucam, bo przecież to jest w koło pierdoło to samo. XD

A w ogóle a propos przełomowych momentów to ostatnio wypatrzyłam sobie na głowie pojedynczy siwy włos, jeszcze nie nadałam mu imienia

[mwahahalima]

“I set fire again To the bridges behind me As they burn, they illuminate The road ahead of me”

a few weeks ago, @thecouncilreturns and I had a DM yap about how James most likely cannot sleep sometimes and he goes for nighttime walks around the neighborhood to calm down and make dark thoughts related to his job go away. If there is any kind of curfew in Helmer... well, he’s able to get out of trouble easily, for obvious reasons. There are a few other layers and elements to this headcanon, but my interpretation of James’s character is already quite counter-fanon to say the least, so I’ll spare you the details lol

[mwahahalima]

Are requests okay? There is an exquisite absence of Hank and Rabindranath fan pieces I do say

🎩

🧐

(Only if you’re up for it thank you :3)

how do I make them not look like De Salvo has been cloned

[giuleye-art]

Goodbye Marjane Satrapi (1969-2026)

[mwahahalima]

No, no, no. Don’t tell me this is how I find out.

I read “Persepolis” in 2016 or so, quite soon after the new Polish translation was published. I think I got it as a Christmas gift from my parents. Fun fact: the simplistic black-and-white graphic style of the comic influenced my own art style for a few years. It was the first graphic novel I’ve read in my life, I enjoyed it a lot, and the movie adaptation made me shed a tear or five. Even though it wasn’t some mystical breakthrough experience for me, it was definitely one of THE experiences for me as a person interested in the history and culture of Iran.

The fact that Mrs. Satrapi didn’t live to see her homeland free and prosperous is heartbreaking.

روانشان شاد و یادشان گرامی

[thecouncilreturns]

while trying to figure out a style for mewgenics stuff i kinda ended up drawing faves of our partner's and oc/canon ship for a friend!

Horatio and Weinberg (for @burnthesuckerup - NOT a ship!)

James and Aliya (for @mwahahalima)

and a surprise under the cut for a steven lover friend on discord lol

[mwahahalima]

the delighted squeak I made when I saw this (I don’t know shit about Mewgenics, but it’s T̴͍̲͚͍̯̫̼͎̟̾̄̀͛̂̿̕͜H̵̹̱͎̺́̈́͛̇̽́̾Ę̴̪̫̲̖͇̓́͐̋̏̇̾̚M̸̡̩̬̂́͑͋͑̓͝)

[wiki-but-made-them-up]

this one isnt even really edited idk

Wow

[mwahahalima]

Today I learnt that “Backstroke of the West” had a Wikipedia article

[mwahahalima]

got feedback from my thesis advisor. Scrolled through the comments. In one of them, he told me not to use em dashes in my work because someone might accuse me of using AI.

I think this is even worse given how I’ve developed my writing skills mostly by writing artistic prose, not scientific works. I am genuinely afraid that people may think I asked a bot to generate my damn MA thesis not only because of the punctuation, but also the style being a bit more “flowery” than in many other articles.

by the way, every work uploaded into the archive is checked with an anti-plagiarism tool. It’s been so for years. A normal thing. However, I am afraid that nowadays that tool might as well check the “AI-ness” of the text while being AI itself— which effectively means somebody might be feeding other people’s works to a bot. If this is true... well, I have considered becoming a lecturer my plan C or D for a future career path, but that would make me abandon this idea altogether. Mind you that my field of study is a niche one (which baffles me, but that’s a separate story).

Technological progress is just eating its own tail. I feel like in a few years they’ll have students write everything on physical paper, with pencils/pens, under constant supervision of another human... because even now someone might accuse me of using AI and changing all the em dashes into shorter ones to make the text look less AI-like, right?

[sugar-petals]

modern media in a nutshell

[mwahahalima]

bad cop, good cop

I usually don’t like crossovers and fandom fusions, but I like these two guys

I am surprised that no one has tried to write a full-blown Papers Please + Beholder universe fusion yet, actually. One has a chunk of good wide-scale worldbuilding (more countries and cities mentioned, more consistent information about historical events like wars, pandemics, economical hardships etc.), while the other goes in depth with internal affairs of a totalitarian country, like bureaucracy and propaganda. Sounds like a good complement.

hear me out:

The Great State ↔ Arstotzka, obviously. The Great State of Arstotzka lol

Helmer ↔ Grestin, but the West/East Grestin division would need some more worldbuilding

Valverde ↔ Kolechia (as the main long-time enemy of the country which the story is set in)

South Borea ↔ Obristan (yeah, I know that TGS wages war against South Borea and Arstotzka doesn’t have any animosity towards Obristan, but... close enough, both South Borea and Obristan are depicted as well-developed countries, good places to live. Not everything would be a 1:1 equivalent, obviously)

New Tomorrow ↔ EZIC (their “work methods” are very similar anyway)

the ministries and other state institutions could be easily “imported” and merged if needed, no collision here

Beholder technologies like cloning and brainwashing/mind control could also exist as they are

same with little flavorful details like the directives, TGS salute, propaganda slogans and other dictatorship-typical crap.

I hope I haven’t forgotten anything.

now to my blorbo fixation i.e. James Cunningham & M. Vonel (btw I headcanon his first name to be Mortimer or something like that). Aghhh I could draw a bunch of parallels between them. They work in the same “industry”, they’re made to seem suspicious and intimidating to the player, we know virtually nothing about their private lives and their past (“More space for headcanons that don’t collide with canon!” my inner fic writer squeals), both are very loyal to the state they serve, both are dutiful and composed. Both would make interesting unreliable narrators in a story. They seem similar attitude-wise and personality-wise, imho, judging by the few dialogues from their respective source media. Vonel feels like the type who would consciously build his authority on fear and intimidation, though— Cunningham is more kind-hearted, but still strict. They would get along. Don’t change my mind, you can’t. :D

[louisegluckpdf]

they won't tell you this in therapy but sometimes the best way to stop catastrophizing/anxiety is to interrupt your spiraling with "girl what the hell are you talking about"

[ytpreviews]

It's not a cure but you have no idea how many times this image has helped me with my OCD

[notgreatthanks]

This tag has been more effective than any meds I’ve ever taken

[the-haiku-bot]

This tag has been more

effective than any meds

I’ve ever taken

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[mwahahalima]

kaningam

mnie też ostatnio o mało co nie rozpłaszczyło na podłodze, gdy sobie podliczyłam, ile razy go jak dotąd narysowałam xd

[mwahahalima]

all I remember from this cartoon, besides the general premise and the names of a few characters, is a scene where an angel and a devil kissed and some ancient civilization got destroyed because of that. I think I should rewatch it (I’ll be disappointed if I find out that I’ve been misremembering something lmao)

for now, here’s Urie

[mwahahalima]

uh-oh, looks like someone didn’t like my stance on the topic of the “rated for ages 12-21” fic and I’ve gotten a few bans. You know what? If you, the person reading this post, think that marking an explicit fetishistic pedo fic as something meant to be read by 12-year-olds is fine, and any expression of disgust towards such behavior bothers you, block me too. And go eat a bowl of raw cockroaches.

EDIT: Apparently the author wrote that A/N as a joke. Still gross and unfunny. And the people who were upset about condemning it didn’t seem to know it was a joke either, so… they’re still okay with someone going “here’s a sexually explicit story featuring minors, and it should be read by minors”.

I believe you can— and should— fight censorship without supporting predatory behavior, total anarchy and lack of responsibility.

[mwahahalima]

a few additional thoughts, because I’ve recently witnessed someone going through a similar situation on the internet and it reminded me of that topic. Putting this stuff under the cut so that it doesn’t jumpscare anyone:

First of all, I am NOT talking about depicting pedophilia (or any other types of perversion, abuse, etc.) in fiction in general. I think it can and should be done— responsibly. There is a huge difference between analyzing disturbing topics or creating vent art vs. acting on perverse urges for the sake of one’s own pleasure. Yes, it technically doesn’t harm any real children directly, but I will never fucking accept it as a normal, sane thing to do. I have explained my stance here already.

Second, I hate the “does it mean that people who enjoy horror movies/books or play violent video games want to actually kill someone?” argument. Well. Here are some reasons why a person might enjoy this type of media (for the record, I’m not one of them):

they consider their real life boring or want to release some tension, so they seek thrills in fiction. Watching fictional people die is like beating a training bag for them. There must be some studies on this topic already, aren’t there?

they want to explore how humans might behave in dangerous situations (especially when it’s a book, where you get the inner monologues and stuff).

they want to laugh, because some horror movies and books are ridiculously cliche, unrealistic and illogical.

consciously consuming fictional violent visuals (or even better— writing them themselves) is cathartic to them because of some trauma they endured.

they are, indeed, psychopaths who want to see other people suffer and die, but are afraid of being punished for harming somebody irl.

Now, the potential reasons why someone might write a story/draw a picture featuring a child in a fetishized NSFW context:

…they want to look at a child in a fetishized NSFW context?