..--..__..--..__..--..__..--..__..--..__..--.. @my-amity-addiction - Tumblr Blog

So I have recently realized that I have been on tumblr for 5 years. It made me think about how dependant I really am on this site so I am going to be taking a break. Not that many of my followers would really care but I'm going to hopefully be inactive for a while.

unclefather

other people: *happily married, 4 degrees, 401k plan, good job*

me: *sits on the toilet drunk with my eyes closed*

twinkfl0yd

open rp

“4 chefs, 3 courses, only 1 chance to win. The challenge: create an unforgettable meal from the mystery items hidden in these baskets before time runs out. Our distinguished panel of chefs will critique their work, and one by one they must face the dreaded chopping block. Who will win the $10,000 prize? And who, will be chopped? 4 competitors think they have what it takes to be the Chopped Champion, let’s meet ‘em.”

forbiddenseason

Ted Cruz chuckled to himself, knowing nothing could defeat his secret weapon, the Cow Butter.

twinkfl0yd

“Interesting strategy with the cow butter coming from our contestant the Zodi- I mean Ted, wouldn’t you agree, judges?”

thetraveler132

“Haha, what a fool you are ted boy.”

Paula deen crawls out from the shadows. “A real amateur i tell ya.”

forbiddenseason

Ted gasps, and quickly becomes upset. “No one makes a fool out of me. This will be the last thing you ever do, Paula” The Zodiac Killer replied dangerously.

thedailyshow

@jordanklepper spent all night looking into Donald Trump’s business ventures. Spoiler alert: it’s all bullshit.

juax

75orchids

i would fight anyone who works at buzzfeed

sourcefieldmix-deactivated20161

My grandma works at Buzzfeed, you’d fight my grandma? you’re a fucking sicko

75orchids

sounds like your grandma’s the sicko, pal. tell her to square up.

sourcefieldmix-deactivated20161

10 Reasons My Grandmother Who Works At Buzzfeed Could Kick Your Ass

onceiwashere

i cant believe its daylight savings time and i havent seen the “hello its me your cousin oskaar from iceland” video on my dash yet you are all slackers

onceiwashere

i guess i have to do all the work around here dont i

clvbpenguin

iphONES NEED TO BE STOPPED

aleeyago-deactivated20160217

wtf-fun-factss

Chinese consumers say they will pay more for American made products - WTF fun facts

pettyrevenge

So I live in a low income housing area of the town I attend college in. I was initially drawn to the apartment I’m currently living in because it was extremely cheap and on the second floor (this is a house converted into two living units). I immediately signed the lease and everything was dandy for the first few weeks. However, I had taken notice of the neighborhood riff raff and was wary to keep my distance. I wasn’t exactly scared of a bunch of young teens, but after observing their absolutely appalling nature, I tried to give them no excuse to fuck with me through vandalizing my car or apartment.

Well, not so long ago, I was sitting on my second story porch, enjoying a cigarette after a long tedious shift, when the teens decided to fuck with me. At first, i didn’t realize they were speaking to me, until one of them called out “hey you indian fag!” Now even though I’m not indian, people often assume I am because of my skin tone, so I’m aware they’re attempting to heckle me. I look up and merely raise my eyebrows in acknowledgment, when one of them kicks over my (full) garbage cans and tells me to get on my knees and pick up my trash you (insert random racist slurs here). They laugh and leave. Knowing that I’ll be fined by the city if I don’t clean up the mess, I begrudgingly clean up the mess. It was while I was kneeling among the strewn garbage that my revenge came to fruition.

A few nights later, I was sitting on my porch again waiting for my targets to arrive. Sure enough, the pack of them comes strutting down the road talking shit and fucking things up. When they get to my house, I shout at them to keep it down and that they’re being obnoxious. Just as i had planned, they took my bait, and the one who had kicked over my trash cans a few days earlier told me that I was a fag and aimed a full forced kick at my trash cans. Little did he know that I had filled them to the bursting point with packed down rocks and dirt, making them extremely heavy and almost unmovable. I savored the moments leading up to contact and burst out laughing when the garbage can failed to move and the kid howled out in pain when his foot connected. Judging from the time he spent on the ground clutching his foot and the fact that he limped away on the verge of tears, I’m assuming he broke a toe or two. I slept like a fucking king that night.

monsterkissed

here is an idea: normalise the idea that adopting kids is a valid option even for parents who could conceive a child themselves, and not just an inferior backup option for parents who can’t

android1000

just because Caitlyn Jenner is a white republican who likes trump does NOT give ya’ll the right to misgender her or be transphobic towards her fucking grow up

#She is a shitty person #The point being SHE