My Mormonism

[sufferingfrommoodpoisoning]

Why is The Series of Bullshit Events getting a second season this fall?

[myownlittlelamp]

What?

[myownlittlelamp]

The other day it was raining and I felt happy. It struck me as a rare feeling, and I thought maybe now would be a good time to take out my patriarchal blessing and read it again and see if this time, because I'm happy, maybe I could glean something better from it and strengthen my testimony of it. It didn't work.

I hate my patriarchal blessing. It feels like it's about someone else, not me. In particular, there is a specific caution I'm given to stay true to a principle that I have NEVER struggled with. I have other struggles and shortcomings, just not THAT one. It has always struck me as odd that it was even brought up in my very own, super special, all about me, once in a lifetime blessing.

Interestingly, I kind of look like someone who might not follow this commandment, and I definitely had friends who didn't follow it at the time I received my blessing. I'm sure there were adults in my life who either thought I was participating, or at least that I was tempted to do so. Birds of a feather. However, the Lord and I have always known otherwise.

I met the stake patriarch exactly one time, the day of my blessing. I've wondered if he wasn't a particularly inspired man, or if he was having an off day, or if he made a snap judgement about me like other adults in my life at the time. Lately I've even been wondering, and I don't know if this is possible or common or what, but what if a youth leader or my bishop spoke to the stake patriarch about me ahead of time and influenced him with gossip? Has anyone heard of that happening or experienced it? It REALLY bothers me and I'm wondering if I'm the only one.

[mormonvulture]

bro i wish YOU had a better understanding of god’s love

[magnetocerebro]

“Peacemakers are not passive.” -Neil L Anderson

[nerdygaymormon]

[nerdygaymormon]

[nerdygaymormon]

[im-mormon-and-not-straight]

Wow Nelson prepared a talk about queer mormon harrassment in just 30 minutes good on him

[bimormondisaster]

He hoped on Tumblr and rewrote his talk

[im-mormon-and-not-straight]

Which one of you is pres nelson

[j-the-latter-gay-saint]

me when a prayer lasts longer than 15-20 seconds

[myownlittlelamp]

I always think, "Alright, nobody asked you to give a talk today."

[mrsmarlasinger]

It shouldn't be so ground-breaking to hear mental health issues addressed head-on in Conference, but as queer members and members of color know too well, there is absolutely a taboo in the Church around not fitting The Mold™, struggling despite faith, being visibly "imperfect," suffering present-tense—no tidy happily-ever-after to serve as an uplifting conclusion to a sacrament talk about coming unto Christ.

Utah has one of the top ten rates of plastic surgery in the nation. Mormon mommy bloggers are blonde and white and lovely. General Authorities play chicken with controversial topics like vaccination and gay rights, saying "we encourage all members of the Church to get vaccinated" and "some members are supporting ideas that are contradictory to gospel principles." The General Conference pulpit bursts with flowers while little micro-aggressions are launched like tiny barbs at anyone who knows that they are the unspoken assailant in "Satan's attack on the family."

Mormon teens kill themselves in droves. I have Band-Aids on my wrist.

No one ever mentions it.

And I want so badly for someone to finally—no bullshit—address how the Church's actions, teachings, and sociocultural norms can damage minority members. BYU student Harry Fisher took his life two months after coming out as gay. DezNat extremists dream of a conservative white utopia. Talk about it. Talk about it. Talk about it.

But a Conference talk about mental health is a start.

[latter-day-saint-nick]

This seems like a good time to make a post I've been sitting on for a while.

A couple of weeks ago a member of the bishopric asked me why Emilly hasn't been coming to church lately. I explained that she doesn't really feel welcome at church. Without going into details that would out her, I furthermore said that although we like to say that the Church is for everyone, regardless of circumstances, there is still an idealised version of who we want people to be that we put on a pedestal. This is especially true when it comes to ideas of what a proper LDS family is supposed to look like. Those of us who will never reach that ideal can easily feel alienated and unwanted.

The man I talked to was kind, acknowledged that nobody is perfect, and that Emilly is definitely wanted and needed at Church. Which was nice of him, but these things are also easy to say when a Church leader has never called your mere existence part of Satan's plan to destroy the family.

As I pondered this conversation, I thought about how just saying that everyone is welcome isn't really enough. There are things that we can actively do to make everyone feel welcome. So I've decided to write an e-mail to the bishopric explaining some reasons why people might feel unwelcome at Church and what can be done to fix it. While I will use examples from my own life, I don't want to make this specifically about me or Emilly or any other one person. So I'm hoping to collect experiences and suggestions from other Church members. This isn't going to be limited to LGBT issues either, so feel free to talk about race, class, disability and anything else you feel needs addressing. Just remember that the suggestions need to be something that a local bishopric can reasonably implement, so don't ask for changes in doctrine and policy.

So please share your thoughts with me, either publicly or anonymously. It's all good. And maybe I can make a difference, at least in one ward.

[relatablemormonmoments]

I really like that the church has said not only the vaccine and masks are good, but that opening our communities to refugees is a good thing to do. I hope that it opens the hearts of those who do not believe in the humanity of others than themselves and their circles. IT feels like the church is healing and becoming more progressive. The church is no longer 50 years behind. Maybe 10, but it is growing stronger.

I actually enjoy the church these days... (maybe not the thought of going to in person church at my ward, but it feels tolerable to proudly call myself a member)

[mysharona1987]

[actualmermaid]

Pretty much everyone knows that Mormons don't drink alcohol, use tobacco, or drink coffee/tea

But most people DON'T know that the Word of Wisdom (Mormon health code) actually has a bunch of other stuff in it, including "eat mostly grain and in-season fruit and vegetables" and "try not to eat meat unless it's winter or otherwise a time of scarcity" and "mild grain-based drinks are fine" and "consume all things with prudence and thanksgiving"

I once read a blog post speculating that if it hadn't been for Prohibition, Mormons today would be vegetarians who drank beer, and I think there is something to that. The whole history of Mormonism after Utah statehood and the end of polygamy is a narrative of "please love us, we'll be just like you, we love following your rules in addition to some of our own, we are Perfect Clean-Cut Americans™️ who are not counterculture in any way"

So copious meat consumption, along with sugar (Our Favorite Vice), became ways that Mormons show(ed) that they were Good Americans Who Consumed Things Just Like Other Good Americans, whether they realized it or not

Vegetarianism exists within Mormonism (one of my uncles is a vegetarian for religious reasons), but it's pretty rare and viewed with suspicion. And people come up with their own non-textual rules about soft drinks and herbal tea to show their Personal Holiness

So the ways that contemporary Mormons treat the Word of Wisdom is kind of a microcosm of my issues with the way Mormons often trade their "wholesome weirdness" for societal acceptance. Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[oodlenoodleroodle]

There is a genuine honest-to-goodness old-time Hollywood movie called Brigham Young (Vincent Price plays Joseph Smith!) where the Mormons are - genuinely very accurately! - depicted as "some sort of suspicious weird communists lurking in our midst."

But then came Correlation in the 60s and the Church took on this "annoying tagalong little sibling" -attitude towards other right wing Christian groups, like, copying the bigger guys in hopes of acceptance.

[actualmermaid]

Vincent Price as Joseph Smith???????? Omg I need to find this

[godisloveislove]

[shutyourmoustache]

As a speech therapist/educator, I’m always trying to find simple techniques/explanations to help little kids process and understand their emotions and then teach them healthy ways to express themselves when they’re angry, frustrated, etc. I notice that telling them I deal with the same difficulties, like wanting to yell when I’m angry, goes a long way. Then they know what they feel isn’t weird BUT there are ways to handle their emotions that don’t hurt themselves or others.