Pandora’s Chaotic Epiphany The Heart lost and Misguided Desires
it was never meant to be like this. Never would Pandora imagine that the chaos in her mind could manifest in her life that her worst fears were trivial compared to the reality.
It has been some time and the reality of the current situation has not fully sunk in but already the mind and the heart are in contention as to the proper manner to move forward. While the heart has already accepted the harsh reality and its own current selfishness the mind is still thinking how to save Pandora from imploding.
The pain of loss is difficult to lose its sting if there is no a proper protocol of the steps rather there is a limbo of inability to see the situation past the now moment.
The love that has blossomed neither flourishes nor dies but rather has slipped into a comatose and state never to be fulfilled or completed in its cycle ... like a toy which no longer is sure of its full potential but has already lost the interest of its owner to be placed away on the shelf to gather dust.
When the chaos was unrefined, Pandora slipped into the thrashing of the waves of non-deserving, not good enough, not pretty enough when the gift of love presented itself but never had she wanted to believe but alas this is making a pattern in her harsh reality.
The love she pulled away yet wouldn't leave to which she selfishly embraced has cast her by the wayside following its own exposure to the hurt that it played a part in, leaving Pandora to reflect as a denominator and cause of her current anguish.
A love which she ignored for the willful ignorance of shyness in her youth has presented before her. Her heart still hunger to grasp on to some moment of joy has already dived into it knowing there is still no future no hope as too many years have passed and this love has long begun another path which will never again cross with hers. Pandora’s heart desperate ignores all rational of the mind because while the mind clings to the hope of a turnaround in the story, the heart has already seen Pandora for what she has become the villain to her own future.
Her FAITH is put into question as to why the Definition of Love would speak to her on every other matter in Pandora’s life except the matter of the heart, why after shutting her heart away and then giving it over to be opened by the Father knowing that the hurt would come that the Father wouldn't take the hurt like he said he would?
She longs to feel deeply the love of the Father and would have hoped that it would also have manifested in another, but maybe the love is to be temporary and fleeting, to be a love for others to appreciate only for its time.
Misguided, as it is still the heart, presses forward hoping the happiness will not slip through like water into the dry desert of the future.
