[shitpostinguniverse]

[hypnoticwinter]

[slashercatz]

[lixiesbabyhands]

how does it feel to be the funniest person on earth

[chemicalheart-deactivated202009]

I am on the floor

[ottogatto]

WHAT

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

Absolutely fascinated by this stance of being committed enough to the tenets of Christianity that you believe the resurrection definitely happened, but explicitly ~not~committed enough to entirely close your mind off to the possibility of there being an entirely different messiah somewhere out there, just chilling in Texas on death row.

[darthflake]

That’s the plot of The Green Mile, no joke

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

It’s WHAT

[thegaymertrainer]

This exchange obliterated me

[thegaymertrainer]

“We don’t know what the sun is” I will never be over this

[thedogeveryonehates]

Morning talk show energy

[redfagdiver]

"things live on it"

[thegaymertrainer]

On my literal 20th time watching this I noticed the damn mannequin woman comes to life in the background to shout that the moon is a moon 🤦🏼‍♂️

[hannahxkeanu]

AU: International pop sensation Hannah Montana and critically acclaimed actor Keanu Reeves are Hollywood’s hottest couple. The two have recently become engaged and on the night of Keanu’s first Oscar win, Hannah suffers a terrible accident whilst performing at her sold out show at Madison Square Garden. Hannah is rushed to hospital but there is nothing the doctors can do to save her life. Keanu is devastated and left with no option other than to terminate her life support.

Made by @/johnswicks on Twitter

[bruceewayne-moved]

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

shes on life support for smashed ankles

[riessene]

You know that trope where two people in modern/ordinary world go to a museum and get mesmerized by a painting of some ancient heroes couple that look exactly like them and then meet each others eyes?

I yell every time

[riessene]

[unbotheredmuse]

[fabulouspegasus]

the three faces i pull in class: pretending to listen, not making eye contact so i don’t get called, and dissociative pout

[aureummel-deactivated20220916]

I fucking love celebrity drama

[arahir]

the chris pine thing is so funny

[arahir]

like here’s chris pine living his absolute best life reading books and loving film and definitely not writing erotica and he’s dropped into a movie that seems like it’s going to be fine like you’ve got florence pugh and former boy band superstar harry styles and nick kroll (??) and shia labeouf (?????) but whatever it’s fine olivia wilde is directing except whoops she falls in love with harry styles and pisses off her boyfriend (ex boyfriend) who’s been having his post-snl renaissance with an apple whatever tv show and so then olivia gets served custody papers while she’s on stage at a film convention and then it turns out florence pugh is actually friends with jason sudeikis and was going to cameo on ted lasso because florence’s ex (zac braff???) was directing some of it and here’s chris pine and living his best life but he’s in a movie where the director is dating the male lead and the female lead isn’t talking to the director because of the everything and then shia laboeouf leaves the film and it’s probably because he’s a pos and the director implies it’s because he’s a pos but then shia posts a vague video showing olivia wilde calling florence pugh miss flo and it’s from month’s ago over nothing but it’s chaos and it’s the venice film fest and you’re chris pine and you’re trapped in venice with these people and harry styles kisses nick kroll on the lips and harry styles is saying the movie is a movie that feels like a film like a real film and florence pugh is fucking gone and it’s just you and then harry styles spits on you (????) and it’s caught on film and you’re chris pine and all you wanted was to be in a movie and write some erotica on the side

[sparklingwaterbabie]

A collection of my favourite tweets, thus far, on #SpitGate that I’m putting here for ease for my friends seeing

[funnytwittertweets]

[odinsblog]

He dropped a dime on his boy!

[bearsbonesbows]

This is our cat Wangji and this is Niall from One Direction on this leg

[speedlimit15]

this is the kind of post that should be blazed. thanks. thank you. great work

[brbjellyfishing]

[mini-wrants]

Only good reason for TikTok.

[glitterweave]

[bakwaaas]

the feminine urge to buy an overpriced Drink every time it’s sunny outside