Iām never going to be able to look at this engagement in the same light, ever again.Ā
āIt still haunts me. Itās this photograph someone had sent me. We had to go to an official event at the Royal Albert Hall, and a friend said āI know you donāt look at pictures, but oh my god you guys look so greatā and sent it to me. I zoomed in, and what I saw was the truth of what that moment was, because right before we had to leave for that I had just had that conversation with Harry (asking for help/her suicidal thoughts) that morning. We had to go to this event and I remember him saying,Ā āI donāt think you can go,ā and I saidĀ āI canāt be left alone.ā We went, and that picture, if you zoom in, what I see is how tightly his knuckles are gripped around mine. You can see the whites of our knuckles because weāre smiling and doing our job, but weāre both just trying to hold on. And every time those lights went down in that Royal box I was just weeping, and he was just gripping my hand.ā - Meghan Markle
