Untitled

[edinburgh-by-the-sea]

as above, so below

[ndx94]

they're basically all like those asian schookids after exam day throwing out reams and reams of books out the window huh

the worst human is the one who ever steps foot in their school again

im just gonna be a youtuber im taking public speaking classes to modulate my voice tone

[glowing-disciple]

You hate sin?

Great!

Now show me you’re capable of loving the sinner.

[ndx94]

everyone says this but in practice they use it as an excuse for missionary dating and sending kids to public school etc.

i'm honestly starting to feel like it is rhetorically valid to say love is not love in this age cuz most people's love is [sarx]

because their parents are also terrible

the only answer vision and dreams, determination, the theology of the cross. however, it might have a different connotation to gen z or maybe i myself am dumb

[ndx94]

It's like they are saying

give me today

soldiers in somebody else's plan

at the medical center

saying

tomorrow, tomorrow, today

under a golden sky

throwing frisbees

At this point it's either God

or the right hand of Metal Gear Rex

that we walk forward

even conscious or unconscious

like the girl with charm,

the guy with rizz

who turned out to be not such a great

manager of human beings

with no idea who

wants to know or doesn't want to know

what's on your heart or in your soul

playing videogames in the living room

like a variation on "Konstantine"

so soon we express ourselves

I feel like no one really want to be known anymore

and in the battle of life maybe

some have decided it's better to lose

pawing, plodding, molto moderato

by the duckpond as the summer rabbits

as though to say, Dust and dreams

not understanding

as though to say, If I had a farm to call my own

I too might encourage college students to resist the government

to hitch a bright-winged back-beaten ride

on "the rude bird of hate"

Kairos time outside the library

in the days when I thought language is everything

though already I was someone else's image,

a character in their computer vision

as though to say, If I love you enough I will get love eventually

purposefulness, worth-it-ness,

even a sense of losing time

No one ever told you you were carrying a treasure

Turns out they love themselves, like the others

going through life saying that it is no one's responsibility

free to love in retirement

living a meaningful sorrowful life

I wonder if I have anything to say

executing a wise plan although

there seemed to be no just cause

like trying to love people I hate

in a realm of abolished common sense

knowing or not knowing if it is wrong

and everyone's looking for a liberation

like the face of the Beloved

As if we did not depart

and as if we truly lived the life of trust

as if it all came in time, predestined,

like a machine that works out right

like at this point no one knows,

just a dream, an internet relationship

on the day of falling rain

and I don't know what I would tell someone

about holding on, or fighting,

no sense of a tangible reward and nowhere to go home to

a dehumanized society,

just someone else's purpose-driven life

[snakeplisskenseyepatch]

Jesus. What's up with all these Left leaning feminists who suddenly call women awful shit when their opinions differ. Damn.

[torix-gaming]

Suddenly?

[ndx94]

It is the entire "muh Western civilization"

I'm not blaming Martin Luther but

it is some people

White conservative men also liek taking potshots at the mythic or real college-educated white women

IT's a sign of a degenerate people - or simply demoralized, exhausted - discouraged to the point where they think the one answer is to get rid of anything that faintly offends them - with no sense of shared purpose nor any ability to persuade. And every rifleman wants to be general (and political commissar) -

in "workplace psychology terms" everyone is a plant or ideas-man, a legislative type coming up with new frameworks that they assume are the beginnings of a benevolent new civitas (in the Bible the first builder of a city is Vain)

Happens in the Church too - instead of solving the real problems people purity spiral and say impossible stuff.

Just go to JApan and Korea which are basically the only countries where talking objectively about someone's error or problem is seen as caring for them by establishing a framework for diagnosing and providing a solution, instead of seen as undermining their mojo of self-persuasion

WE must learn to live together with love and patience, we dying ones

[loonavrsl]

Yves says a quick comeback for her is being prepared 🍎

source

[ndx94]

I want her to come to my planet again

Eebu..

[ndx94]

It's really messed up, everything is really stressful

and still we are groaning under people that exalt uselessness and playing around

Pope Leo says "Peace is no longer sought" and this is true

like no one has been seeking peace since 1871, just more and more ludicrous balloon-trips

This is the kind of recreation that leaves a hangover if not leading to outright catastrophe

We must become like monks who sleep and hear angels in their sleep

or engineers who dream up new algorithms (in the Holy Ghost)

You think you are doing a chemical unwind, solving a problem

You are doing violence to yourself and harming yourself

Maybe someone once told you you're a soldier, war-trash, that you should treat yourself like a machine ~

You must find the presence of God (I'm not good at this honestly; I just feel the presence of my own mind and find it hard to let go)

Go home and kiss your spouse, yes,

Just read the Bible, you need to learn how to read

You need to learn how to listen to God and seek wisdom

all the way

[feminismisstillahatemovement]

Feminism is a propaganda-driven mental disorder that removes women's ability to love, reason or maintain anything objectively good in the world.

[ndx94]

I can actually understand this mind and it is not just women but men as well because everything about Charlie Kirk types of pro-natalism really is a little offensive. Deeper Christians like Solzhenitsyn pointed out that you can't make Man the end of Man - including even the love between mother and child (sorry, China) or a husband and wife.

Many children come into the world with no purpose - born of "accidental parents" - and stumble around in the darkness looking for God, often finding something much worse.

Other children come into the world "born of a husband's will" (as Jesus says) but are not really wanted past a point. It is dispiriting to me to see the Church double down on Genesis rather than Acts in this day; it seems a symptom of demoralization and neglect of the Holy Spirit that so many Christians, as well as secular conservatives, no longer want to strengthen people's souls but just generate more of "that which is born of flesh" (for a vacation to Iraq, Ukraine, the mental ward etc.)

In terms of my future wife, the archetype I really look for is Hannah in the Bible - someone who prayed not just for a child to justify her before her husband (like Leah) or before society (again, sorry China) but for a child she could give as a gift back to God, who ended up becoming the perfect prophet whose words never fell to the ground. So if you want a family I think you should pray the whole way through, even draw up a wish-list of prayers you hope will fructify 150 years from now.

[ndx94]

*I will say this, it is my strong conviction that part of why I'm not dead, regardless what you think of politics or culture, is the outright prayer of Koreans (and others). There are probably people in prison in different places in the world today, they could be complaining to God or even eating, or maybe they're mining coal in a gulag but they really are praying and they know that even if they die God is pleased with their prayer, and whatever is meant to happen by way of salvation or strife in this world will be coefficient with their asking God.

Even the theologically wishy-washy Pope Francis was of the opinion that Christians today don't pray enough - maybe especially Romanist types who really do have a vast corporate institution they can look to and a trillion magazines to read and conversations to have. In my own life I have noticed that sometimes it seems like church is 10 minutes of songs and 10 minutes of creed and prayer and then like 50 minutes of warmed-over literary criticism followed by hours of snacking and chaffering. That's good for diagnosing metamodern cybernetics at the Sorbonne or sth but past a point if you want a hand to hold you have to see about God Himself (as it talks about in The Knowledge of the Holy).

[feminismisstillahatemovement]

Feminism is a propaganda-driven mental disorder that removes women's ability to love, reason or maintain anything objectively good in the world.

[ndx94]

I can actually understand this mind and it is not just women but men as well because everything about Charlie Kirk types of pro-natalism really is a little offensive. Deeper Christians like Solzhenitsyn pointed out that you can't make Man the end of Man - including even the love between mother and child (sorry, China) or a husband and wife.

Many children come into the world with no purpose - born of "accidental parents" - and stumble around in the darkness looking for God, often finding something much worse.

Other children come into the world "born of a husband's will" (as Jesus says) but are not really wanted past a point. It is dispiriting to me to see the Church double down on Genesis rather than Acts in this day; it seems a symptom of demoralization and neglect of the Holy Spirit that so many Christians, as well as secular conservatives, no longer want to strengthen people's souls but just generate more of "that which is born of flesh" (for a vacation to Iraq, Ukraine, the mental ward etc.)

In terms of my future wife, the archetype I really look for is Hannah in the Bible - someone who prayed not just for a child to justify her before her husband (like Leah) or before society (again, sorry China) but for a child she could give as a gift back to God, who ended up becoming the perfect prophet whose words never fell to the ground. So if you want a family I think you should pray the whole way through, even draw up a wish-list of prayers you hope will fructify 150 years from now.

[wizardelf]

[ndx94]

In my 20s when I saw stuff like this I thought life is great because life is cringe like an amazing (French) novel; now i'm not sure what to think

God is the ultimate poet and artist and we are all inevitable people, there are no accidental children

[ndx94]

red and orange prayer,

everyone's supposed to be happy

free to believe, free even

to experience the day as a gift

an 18 year mistake quite honestly

it is hard to take some people seriously

never learning - never even dreaming

with heavy steps into the futureless bedrooms

it's not a bad thing to love life i guess

not a bad thing to love love

nor pass by in silence, smiling at satan's frown

God's spies drawing lines

pretty lines amongst the constellations of decision points

diving into the mystic past

at the coffeeshop so proper

for our little life

[ndx94]

as before the winter fire and saying i am sorry

in your perhaps hand a perhaps soft

or hardback book,

don't really care since the letter kills and yet

here they come,

both those who believe in their own

daughters and sons

and those who don't

and it seems like either way humans can tend to get it wrong

like no one's really looking around,

it's a cool story

for generals and geniuses and their camp-followers

[ndx94]

really happy in a way ever since college

when i was tutoring this kid

at the center and my girlfriend met me

feeling special, my first business card,

grad school exams

in any case just looking for a wall to lean on

respectable university

this year the musical is the little mermaid

i feel like God wants to say

look around but not too much

as the latinX bakery named

for the holy trinity

i feel like all these people are terrible and i am just going to start my own church

with a radio station, a school

and a robot army (nukes included)

i do not trust any of these pranksters with my family

twilight of the gooners and boomers

can't get away from the shame just wanna drive

in the deer it is like germany

the escarpment, the trees

and the boats by the lakehouse

you think it would make you happy

till you realize the moss your soul is gathering

then it's like, why should i trust anybody (even myself)

we're all just processing our feelings about being bad and evil

if that's what it takes for the Spirit to empty our "selves"

[ndx94]

people really don't care

if there was a shooting and their kids died

if they themselves got cancer

running up the credit card

just want rizz and to like

oneself, one's one, and the shuffle and slide

if you ever find something better than yourself

you seem to be at risk for s**cide

feeling like this blonde girl i saw once

like, are you from russia cuz

I remember the familiar architecture,

the book that I read at Barnes and Noble

and in retrospect how unprepared i was

though people think that things are certain

"You do not have because you do not ask"

I feel like at this point, if I gave you everything the universe owed you

there would be no difference between me

and your Amazon DSP

cuz in fact no one wants anybody

the experience of the hospital room

the sense of all that is holy

i felt like i don't have the right to my own personality

in a way it's really dumb

to love someone just cuz you think you need love

[ndx94]

everyone's offended not really thinking

speaking the language of cheeseburgers(?)

my friend and i used to read that website

as love grew or died

river so green and the dream

of meeting minds, not growing old

everyone acts like their love is a cope

years pass in which we decide nothing

and then decide everything

people's destinies are dark to us

a bit obsessed with high-flown

quixotic intentions

like to say, is this the life i can save

i feel like i should move to california

[ndx94]

already too late by the time you say

with a problem it is

supposed to be somebody's job to fix

we get tired,

flouncing about the orchard

remembering, thinking

everyone else felt to have this nous

while the sad young men grew imperious

victims of our bodies, people in denial

i just feel like a dead man

i feel like what most people say is just not true

as if i took my watch off

and put it on again

in the other days i always assumed

that i was more or less right

not even propelled by love

as the marigold sun

thinking on the bus

of "muh nobility of soul"

past a point it's easy to call

easy to say who the bad guys are

grace by faith or lukewalker

a very different song

as from a different mom

[ndx94]

red and orange prayer,

everyone's supposed to be happy

free to believe, free even

to experience the day as a gift

an 18 year mistake quite honestly

it is hard to take some people seriously

never learning - never even dreaming

with heavy steps into the futureless bedrooms

it's not a bad thing to love life i guess

not a bad thing to love love

nor pass by in silence, smiling at satan's frown

God's spies drawing lines

pretty lines amongst the constellations of decision points

diving into the mystic past

at the coffeeshop so proper

for our little life

[ndx94]

as before the winter fire and saying i am sorry

in your perhaps hand a perhaps soft

or hardback book,

don't really care since the letter kills and yet

here they come,

both those who believe in their own

daughters and sons

and those who don't

and it seems like either way humans can tend to get it wrong

like no one's really looking around,

it's a cool story

for generals and geniuses and their camp-followers

[ndx94]

really happy in a way ever since college

when i was tutoring this kid

at the center and my girlfriend met me

feeling special, my first business card,

grad school exams

in any case just looking for a wall to lean on

respectable university

this year the musical is the little mermaid

i feel like God wants to say

look around but not too much

as the latinX bakery named

for the holy trinity

i feel like all these people are terrible and i am just going to start my own church

with a radio station, a school

and a robot army (nukes included)

i do not trust any of these pranksters with my family

twilight of the gooners and boomers

can't get away from the shame just wanna drive

in the deer it is like germany

the escarpment, the trees

and the boats by the lakehouse

you think it would make you happy

till you realize the moss your soul is gathering

then it's like, why should i trust anybody (even myself)

we're all just processing our feelings about being bad and evil

if that's what it takes for the Spirit to empty our "selves"

[ndx94]

people really don't care

if there was a shooting and their kids died

if they themselves got cancer

running up the credit card

just want rizz and to like

oneself, one's one, and the shuffle and slide

if you ever find something better than yourself

you seem to be at risk for s**cide

feeling like this blonde girl i saw once

like, are you from russia cuz

I remember the familiar architecture,

the book that I read at Barnes and Noble

and in retrospect how unprepared i was

though people think that things are certain

"You do not have because you do not ask"

I feel like at this point, if I gave you everything the universe owed you

there would be no difference between me

and your Amazon DSP

cuz in fact no one wants anybody

the experience of the hospital room

the sense of all that is holy

i felt like i don't have the right to my own personality

in a way it's really dumb

to love someone just cuz you think you need love

[ndx94]

everyone's offended not really thinking

speaking the language of cheeseburgers(?)

my friend and i used to read that website

as love grew or died

river so green and the dream

of meeting minds, not growing old

everyone acts like their love is a cope

years pass in which we decide nothing

and then decide everything

people's destinies are dark to us

a bit obsessed with high-flown

quixotic intentions

like to say, is this the life i can save

i feel like i should move to california

[ndx94]

i dunno if it's really true or not but i feel like there are at least two intellectual styles which are the person that seeks the truth, and the person that mistakes an opus of opinions for some kind of balanced perspective. an intrinsic weakness of checks-and-balances "muh constitution" type republicanism is that everyone starts to hear one-hand-other-hand but when it comes to making a decision or taking a side sometimes it doesn't work.

watching this youtube video of this guy woh is like, a young adult author and youtuber who writes young adult novels about youtubers and he is saying no one should have a dream or fixed goal, just pick up tricks as you go along. this is the thing about the gamification of technological society where it's not that hard for a lot of people to achieve modest success and, because it seems to come easy, a fair number of card-carrying ultra-orthodox midwits think that their own experience applies to everyone.

i'm not condemning internet randos but honestly thinking about my life i feel as though only love-experiences, not sex or infatuation but a real sense of connection to the mind and soul of another and the mind of God, shape a person. past a point with people in my life now reaching their middle age i even see how those who didn't have a powerful impression of love in an age of innocence, to one extent or another lose their memories. they like telling little stories but they don't hold anything in their heart; though, saying this, i realize that i too am no mary treasuring up the angels' things in my heart...

dead hearts...

honestly when you reach a certain age - it seemed to hit way earlier for some millennials - you just start letting it rain in one way or another cutting people off. you realize that this person is never going to work or that friendship doesn't really serve you. without a basis in doctrine that talks about the value of someone you might even commit a serious crime or cruelty or neglect someone to whom you have a formal, covenantal obligation. even without crossing over the line there is a way in which the conscience weakens. in some sense God seems to set up the world this way though, there, to assert that people's carelessness is the Father's will flies in the face of not only biblical theology but observed realities like mother-love or the perduration of friendship, if not also soldiers' selflessness. the real problem in the West seems to be creative incompetence - not just in the sense of bad art but for instance in being unable to create revitalizations for cities or any kind of reasonable, prudent legislation surrounding technology. it's interesting that the UK wants to get rid of all social media for udner-16's which - to put it in a slightly fundamentalist way - to my sense violates children's human rights by cutting them off from potential sources of communication; something even south korea with a serious internet-overuse or -addiction problem isn't doing. a number of my good friends had really valuable formative experiences with online friends from all over the world, in tender and sometimes very vulnerable high school years. cutting them off from that in some sense is like turning the lights off and it appeals to a kind of anti-real sentimentalism.

[ndx94]

i feel very european and sort of anatal

it is bad

some of my old friends and had babies and i wasn't that happy

what is with me

cannot be happy for anyone

i feel likke theyre just gonna go around fetishizing their own experience for 13 years then act like their kids never existed

[ndx94]

i feel like it is all engineered and even the people that claim to be living by faith ..

[ndx94]

i feel very european and sort of anatal

it is bad

some of my old friends and had babies and i wasn't that happy

what is with me

cannot be happy for anyone

i feel likke theyre just gonna go around fetishizing their own experience for 13 years then act like their kids never existed

[ndx94]

Law school mothers left barred from the bar by pregnancy — and Korea's top court is split

Law school graduates have five attempts in five years to pass the exam. And under the current law, military service is the only exemption.

i hate myself for not being in korea ~

it's not even because i want to get married to a good person

other countries are just gonna be like, oh you want a law degree and a child better lean in and nothing is anyone's problem the rules are there to punish anyone who doesn't make themselves an exception, and the only evil in life is to give someone more than they gave you

i should just pray for all these people, i know there are some good gen z kids (both sexes). i don't know how to build a world for them. just baptize inna river inna wood and get beheaded by herod i guess

[ndx94]

on a more positive note if you are like 15-30 years old reading this and you think you might want to move to korea

like you watched some film (not bts but films that have that subtle vibe, like take care of my cat) and thought what an interesting place

just do it but make sure you learn the language

they're all praying, they are intense but committed to non-violence

trying to build a new global family

don't even listen to trump, putin, don't listen to bernie either. don't listen to anyone who's not inviting you to join a war of love (love is not love)

[ndx94]

Law school mothers left barred from the bar by pregnancy — and Korea's top court is split

Law school graduates have five attempts in five years to pass the exam. And under the current law, military service is the only exemption.

i hate myself for not being in korea ~

it's not even because i want to get married to a good person

other countries are just gonna be like, oh you want a law career and a child better lean in and nothing is anyone's problem the rules are there to punish anyone who doesn't make themselves an exception, and the only evil in life is to give someone more than they gave you

i should just pray for all these people, i know there are some good gen z kids (both sexes). i don't know how to build a world for them. just baptize inna river inna wood and get beheaded by herod i guess