why won't you devour me?

you can 𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗲 as i am, but tell me i could have been 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘳.

[nectarot]

an independent and privately written multi-muse blog containing characters across different forms of media. in an exploration of themes including, loss, codependency, healing and survival. with acts of rebellion and unconditional devotion. these adaptions are my own. irregularly written yet loved by soy, 25+, her or they. guidelines, roster, prompts. intertwined with,

[notmorbid]

discontent.

dialogue prompts from discontent by beatriz serrano.

i only go to work to lower my air conditioning bill.

work is just a role, and i've mastered it perfectly.

the truth is, i don't know how to do anything.

i don't know how i got here.

my job is to be nice and sell snake oil.

i'm good at selling ideas.

i've mastered the art of working as little as possible.

offices are like hunting: the more you move, the less chance you have of being shot.

i'd give you the rest of my life, if you asked me to.

that's anxiety. you know that, right?

i think everyone deserves a patch of sky.

everything's easy with you.

i wish we could fall in love with each other.

are you feeling sick?

you look pretty, but your face is like death warmed over.

are you sleeping well? are you eating well?

i know you won't disappoint me.

you seem vexed.

i have complete faith in you.

everyone believes singers are singing about them.

when was the last time you really talked to ____?

you never know what's going on with people.

if you were a fabric, you'd be a _____.

i feel like you're going to psychoanalyze me.

would you like a tangerine?

age is a question of attitude.

whenever i talk to you, i feel like a contestant on a game show.

everything's going well here, you know.

i'm not sure how to talk to ____, or what about.

i really don't have anything to say about my life.

i just want you to be happy.

happiness? what does that even mean?

are you going to come up? soon?

i hate thinking about work outside of work.

i don't know where i'll go, but i won't be here.

i work all the fucking time.

step up, or step aside.

you were my friend. my best friend.

you're unreal. like someone on a magazine cover.

you made me remember who i used to be.

i thought about you a lot. i thought about calling you.

my whole life is a performance.

most of the time, i have no regrets.

the body is just a tool. like a painter's canvas, or a sculptor's block of marble.

we're all condemned to play the role we've been assigned.

if you won the lottery, would you be going to work the next day?

i'm afraid of everyone forgetting about me.

you get to an age where getting wasted isn't fun, it's an open portal to hell on earth.

the hangover's a problem for future me.

what happened? can i do anything?

maybe that's the secret to happiness: lowering your expectations. settling.

maybe i'm the problem.

nothing going on around me makes any sense.

i don't think i'm doing okay.

don't worry. i'm going to call for help.

you want a joint?

the world smiles on people like you.

do i seem fun? hip? cool?

fake it til you make it. or until people leave you alone.

you can't change the world. you can only try to keep the world from changing you.

you were always a bit odd.

we're a family. a strange family.

[nectarot]

fresh interaction call, specify muse or simply perish.

[nectarot]

i leave for vacation today! i won’t be back until the 29th, but my intention is to do a reset and return.

[nectarot]

vacation is over, i'm going to spend the night working a blog redo. i might bite the bullet and clear my inbox of a lot of old stuff, same with drafts.

[nectarot]

i leave for vacation today! i won’t be back until the 29th, but my intention is to do a reset and return.

[nectarot]

for the time being eddie will be moved back here!

[mcflymemes]

A WHOLE BUNCH OF QUESTIONS *  assorted questions i just came up with, adjust as necessary.

where did you find this?

you really thought this would work?

was it something i said?

have you been keeping this from me the whole time?

would you help me zip this in the back?

are you paying attention to me?

when were you going to tell me the truth?

who are you, really?

will you help me lift this?

where did this even come from?

who gave you this?

where did you learn to shoot like that?

did you ever think it would come to this?

when did you know?

do you believe in ghosts?

are you telling me the truth?

does it ever stop hurting?

would you pass that to me?

would you ever consider... us?

can you turn the lights off when you go?

maybe you could give me a massage?

was that a good idea?

do you think i was too harsh?

do you realize what you just did?

when's the last time you slept?

are you mocking me?

who taught you to use a sword?

was that fun? did you have a good time?

so when are we doing that again?

will you come upstairs?

what was that sound?

did anyone follow you?

do you think we're alone?

will you stay with me? keep me company for the night?

do you regret sleeping with me?

would you take that pot off the stove for me?

would you teach me how to fight?

will you promise to tell me the truth?

why did you lie?

where did these guys come from?

should we call for help?

was that someone upstairs?

when were you supposed to be back?

could you try harder next time?

where did you find this?

what is the meaning of this?

what does the map say?

can you find an answer?

what if we run out of time?

when's the next game?

did you mean it? when you said you loved me?

why don't i believe you?

why are you making excuses?

when's the next train?

we're shit out of luck, aren't we?

why is it so cold in here?

would you please get up off your ass and help me?

was that so hard?

were you in love with me back then?

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FOR ORDINARY THINGS THAT FEEL INTIMATE *  inspired by this post. these don't have to be romantic - you can specify romantic or not when you send them. in essence, these are simply intimate, affectionate moments to share with someone you love and care about. adjust as necessary, send 'reverse' for the reversal of the prompt

[ lean ] sender rests their head on receiver's shoulder

[ shop ] sender and receiver go to the grocery store together

[ brush ] sender brushes receiver's hair

[ tie ] sender helps receiver with their tie, either by putting it on or adjusting it

[ necklace ] sender helps receiver with the clasp of their necklace from behind

[ zip up ] sender assists receiver with zipping up a piece of clothing

[ unzip ] sender assists receiver with unzipping a piece of clothing

[ shoelaces ] sender bends down to tie receiver's shoelaces

[ swipe ] sender notices a smudge of something on receiver's face and gently wipes it off

[ braid ] sender braids receiver's hair

[ jacket ] sender takes their jacket off and hangs it on receiver's shoulders

[ puddle ] sender hurries to stop receiver from stepping into a puddle

[ drinks ] sender brings receiver a drink from a bar/their kitchen

[ feed ] sender feeds receiver's pet/s for them

[ cook ] sender and receiver cook a meal together

[ feed ] sender allows receiver to try a bite of their dish, holding their fork out for receiver to taste

[ teach ] sender, an expert at something, takes time to teach receiver how it works and how they can get better at it, too

[ readjust ] sender comes up behind receiver and readjusts their stance (maybe holding a gun, holding a golf club, aiming for something, etc.) to help them

[ makeup ] sender fixes receiver's makeup for them

[ bathroom ] sender and receiver go to a public restroom together and have a normal conversation in between the stalls

[ aloud ] sender reads aloud to receiver

[ refill ] sender refills receiver's glass without asking

[ massage ] sender notices receiver looks tense, steps up behind them, and massages their shoulders

[ listen ] sender listens to receiver explain something they're passionate about

[ silence ] sender and receiver comfortably exist in silence together, both of them working or reading or focusing on something different

[ food ] sender brings food over to receiver's house

[ hum ] sender hums along to a song receiver is singing

[ see ] sender sees something that reminds them of receiver and texts them a picture of it

[ admire ] sender stares at receiver across a room, silently admiring and appreciating them from afar

[ win ] sender lets receiver beat them in a game

[ puzzle ] sender helps receiver solve/put together a puzzle

[ carry ] after receiver falls asleep in an inconvenient place, sender carries them to a bed and tucks them in

[ kneel ] sender finds receiver sick in the bathroom ("tossing their cookies"), and kneels beside them, holding their hair back and cleaning their face

[ clean ] sender helps bathe receiver

[ wash ] sender helps receiver wash their hair

[ patch ] sender carefully patches one of receiver's wounds

[unchildhood]

ADRIENNE RICH x MOSS ANGEL THE UNDYING x ANA MENDIETA

‘The Burning of Paper Instead of Children’, Collected Poems: 1950 – 2012 (2016);

Sea-Witch Vol. 2: Girldirt Angelfog (2017);

Untitled: Silueta Series (1978), Super-8 film, colour, silent

[nectarot]

i can tell something's wrong. @ lucas!

the lightning strikes through grey blankets, hot and stark as it hits ash covered fields. it sits differently outside @paladinstales windows, but it caught them before they could bike to the hospital. mrs. wheeler always makes them wait, the unknown after effects from the break in the sky still to be yet discovered. “ it's cause everything is different. ” lucas doesn't look when he speaks, the words sit heavy with each syllable. fog catching on the window with the sudden temperature change. it was suppose to be summer. “ before we could always just fix things, all of us... now i don't know if we can. ” fingers toy alongside his book bag, the zipper that gets stuck with each drag. he's been meaning to fix it, to rub a little oil over the ends and then pull it smooth through it's track.

“ it sounds like... ” his voice drags and he readjusts himself on the couch, it gives him time to think of what to say, but then the bones still crack and reverberate against his skull. it makes the healing parts of his face and his left eye ache. the delicate skin there still swollen and bruised from the way that jason's knuckles had repetitively collided with his orbital bone. “ it sounds like i'm giving up, but i'm not. ” his tone strains like the fist his makes, the healing splits sting from the fight in the creel attic. it haunts him in the quiet or when the sky gets too dark, when he's away from max for too long and he's unable to play the tapes he spent hours recording. “ i think i'm just... scared, you know? ”

[notmorbid]

the americans: season 6 [2/2].

dialogue prompts from the sixth season of fx's the americans.

nothing new to report.

every time i go, someone winds up dead.

you got any more steam you want to blow off?

put them away. are you trying to give me cancer?

i smoke. i've always smoked. it relaxes me.

i guess i smoke more now than i used to.

did you eat? i'll make you something.

us film nerds need to stick together.

i know you. i see stress on your face all the time.

it's better to talk about bad shit than to let it fester.

just between us, what are the chances we'll pull this off?

i don't understand why you're so unhappy. you have a nice life, right?

i just wanted to see if everything's alright.

what's happening to you?

i'm still the same asshole as always. don't care about anybody but myself, right?

i can tell something's wrong.

i wasn't sure you'd really come.

i feel a lot better about our chances with you here.

you're always asking me to tell you things. so i told you.

i love you. i'm sorry i left like that. i thought of you every day.

i've never forgotten all you did for me.

i hope you die the miserable death you deserve.

i just wanted to check on you.

i don't really have any friends.

it's okay if this isn't what you want.

how long? how long has this been going on?

you love to talk. if you really wanted to tell me, you would've told me.

you don't think i'm a human being?

i would do anything for you. i did.

i'm always half living out of a suitcase.

do you drink? i don't want to corrupt you.

i never said anything to anyone. and i never will.

i was raised to be loyal.

you smoke too much.

any chance you've got ten minutes for a beer?

do you realize what you've done?

i had so much faith in you.

even when things were bad between us, i never lost faith in you.

if you knew me, you'd know never to lie to me.

what's left for you now?

quitting was never an option for me.

i didn't know you were coming over.

if you lie to me now, after everything, i will never forgive you.

do not lose who you are.

it's not something i want to do, but i'll do it if i have to.

let's not pussyfoot around.

we have to go, and we have to go now. come on.

why are you acting this way?

you were my only friend in my whole, shitty life.

i would have done anything for you.

you know how proud we are of you, right? and how much we love you?

i just want you to be yourself, okay? because you're great.

i don't want a kid, anyway.

we'll get used to it.

[nectarot]

having a bit of a hard time. my car died on me yesterday and i’m honestly fried! i’m going to take some time to uncook my brain and revisit.

[nectarot]

her boots are thrown out before them, old leather losing it shape. the red shoelaces sagging through holes that have been poked through with one of daryl's knife. she's leaning back on her palms, pressing to the floor board for some support. the sun sets different here, doesn't sit pretty on the fields her dad and her worked on. the next over by the hog pin was rick's work, than what was sowed with carl. she remembers seeing it's beginning bloom before the tank tore through the field and fence, before her father's blood had soiled the field.

“ it ain't.. like b'fore, you know? ” the sense of harmony they found behind mortar, in cell blocks and chow time. “ feels different this time, ” her tone pulls on hope strings, like notes her father sung, or maybe she's just being stupidly hopeful. her head lulls toward @intromusic, his nerves showing in how he rub callous to callous, dry skin dragging like sandpaper. “ don't you think so? ” her brown eyes drift, catch him and how he worries in stance. it's why they're still sleeping on the floor in one house, but as her stomach settles with regular meals once more, so does the rest of her.

[memetaped]

frightened rabbit taken from a bunch of their albums. content warning for suicide and violence.

we can be best friends with the people we hate.

i’m here. not heroic, but i try.

nothing’s worse than realizing who you’ve hurt.

and all those fuck-ups counted for nothing, ‘cause nothing makes sense.  

fall down, find god, just to lose it again.

don’t waste your time on me.

so i’ll stick to my guns, but from now on it’s war.

build a home.

and once you’re tucked in bed, you’ll hug onto the day for the last few seconds.

it’s been so long since i heard you speak.

when it’s all gone, something carries on.

in an otherwise disappointing life, made right.

and i’ll protect you. i promise i will.

what are you running from?

and build a house around you.

though the corners are lit, the dark can return with the flick of a switch.

wipe the smile from your face and sing the default blues.

go where the joyless bastard lives.

you’re the shit and i’m knee-deep in it.

leave the rest at arm’s length.

and realize it’s not the end, it’s an uncomfortable pause.  

being lonely, so leave me alone.

will you save me the fake benevolence?

i think i’ll save suicide for another day.

fell down, found love, but i can lose it again.

we’ll speak in our secret tongues.

i am armed with the past, and the will, and a brick.

and when i write them out, they don’t make sense. i need you to pencil in the rest.

daybreak comes with the devil’s hum.

well, i crippled your heart a hundred times and still can’t work out why.

you told all of your friends. and no one came.  

i feel better and better and worse and then better.

turn off the light bulb ache to a shrieking pain.

it passed me by, but it’s never gone.

like a blush of love, it hits me without warning.  

i’ll be shakespeare’s moonstruck king.

get out of my heart.

i’m just an architect. i have built nothing.

it’s been a while since i dreamed this.

there’s a broken jaw behind the dog-tooth smile.

and while i’m alive, i’ll make tiny changes to earth.

[triheirs]

❝ 𝓑ASTARD CHILD THAT I AM,

 ‍  ‍  ‍  ‍ YOU CAN SEE IT IN MY SWAGGER. IN THE PALMIST LINES OF MY HANDS ⅋ MY LIPS THAT BUD LIKE 𝕯AGGERS. ❞

ind. selective. canon divergent. highly priv & mutually exclusive portrayal of hope mikaelson, the original tribrid, from tvdu. sired by jacy.

[lukaskyle-moved]

MAGGIE RHEE 11x21 — “Outpost 22”

[nectarot]

his hands worry around an old silver chain, the feeling cool to callous. he feels weird and out of place, sitting in clean clothes and a well conditioned house. it's like something pulled straight from a decor magazine his mother would always look at while waiting a turn in the check out. she'd never actually buy them, but he sits with that picture of her, how nice she'd always dress just to go to the store or how she'd say buying a magazine is a waste of hard earned money ─ like the candy that was purposely displayed at his eye level that he only asked for once. when he can't sit with the ache of that picture for long, he watches through the blinds alongside @sedulae as if the quiet will get them, but the houses of alexandria sit quiet and magazine perfect.

the house floor is littered with make shift beds, fresh linens and couch pillows. not the old and torn up sleeping bags they've patched over with duct tape. this quiet is different, sitting peaceful and pretty like life once had. “ could be a nice place, you know? ” his voice is careful, a hum like the air kicking back on. he feels it at the back of his neckline, tickles him like bad feeling that he turns around again. he counts the bodies and recites their names like a prayer. the chain tightening around his forefingers, he unwraps it to repeat again just in the opposite direction. he pauses to linger at the familiar curve of her, how she's the closest to him at the end of the rug before it breaks to hardwood. beside that is judith, carl and michonne. rick's too worried to settle, checking in other houses just given to them as if they have teeth. even he half expects it too. “ don't think we would of made it much longer out there. ”