you guys should see my chest hair @nhlbarrie - Tumblr Blog

slowwshoww

most hateable nhl team go!

toronto maple leafs

vegas golden nights

boston bruins

tampa bay lightning

philadelphia flyers

washington capitals

new york rangers

pittsburgh penguins

colorado avalanche

whichever team evander kane is on 🌈

Voting ended onJul 7, 2023

and no i did NOT forget the chicago professional ice hockey team! they would sweep!!! pick a different team!

#you're gonna put the avs on here but not the predators #disrespectful

gabriel-landeskog

this photo of jt and ej driving me nuts driving me insane. ej straight up gripping ass in front of all of denver

#finger right in the crack too this team was so horny

hannovers

Q: You and Sidney Crosby are forever linked because you’re both from Cole Harbour. He was at your party. True or false you shut it down, long since in bed, and Sid closed out your party?

A: That is true. Sid’s sneaky. He can go all night when he wants to. I was pretty tired from the day in my defence. I was going all day. Little sore too. So I just needed to go to bed. I’m glad he could finish it off for me.

Q: You have a great relationship and I’ve always wondered. Of all the things Sid has influenced you and taught you along the way, is there one that stands out that’s made you who you are today?

A: I just think that being around him. He really enjoys every day. He’s never in a bad mood. He’s always laughing and making jokes. People probably wouldn’t think that but it’s just fun being around him. He makes every day enjoyable in the summers especially. He’s just worried about his teammates, his day-to-day, and that’s really it. I don’t think he’s really worried about how people perceive him and his legacy. He is who he is. I think he’s one of the best ever. He just enjoys every day at the rink.

Q: Nine seasons into your career and with the Stanley Cup under your belt now, do you still measure yourself against him?

A: I never have. I’ll never be close to him. No, I don’t think. He’s my hero. (Q: You’re getting there!) No, I’ll never get there. That’s okay though.

nathan heart eyes mackinnon

#theres a lot to unpack here nathan

suiheisen

slut era… (© brian babineau)

#THIGHS #crush me like a watermelon sidney

tom-hodges

Pride Night with the New Jersey Devils

#these fuckin SLAP

tblueger

finding out that people DON'T know why it's called a dick trick is so funny to me bc. wdym you don't know the story about joe thornton deflecting a weird question about tomas hertl "showboating" by scoring four goals in one game by threatening to whip his dick out

freebooter4ever

i know i said i would draw sid in those powder blue 2008 jerseys next but i got distracted again

#oh this is a very fun style #suits him #evgeni malkin #fan art

zashamalkin

Alternate view

I die.

#this is so cute 😭😭😭#evgeni malkin

timbitshockey

does anyone know if picking the puck up with your teeth and fucking pegging it is illegal. obviously you can't throw it but is it in the rules that you can't chew the bitch down the ice. i really think we should try it. might solve our powerplay issues

so obviously you can’t just pick the puck up with your hands and put it IN your mouth because that’s handling the puck. which means the biggest problem i see is that if you’re our beautiful baby boy and test subject jake guentzel, you’ve got to get belly-to-the-ice, get the puck in your mouth hands-free like you’re bobbing for apples, and then get back up and start legging it without getting your teeth whacked out by someone else’s stick. but i think if you can do that it’s sort of an airbud situation where there’s nothing in the rules that say you CAN’T do it, technically.

now, the problem is, there’s nothing in the rules about it NOW, but i can imagine it’d be a sort of situation where they would add a rule about it quite quickly and name it “the guentzel rule” or whoever actually pulled it off. so the thing we have to know about the pelican puck manoeuvre (patent pending) is that it is a move we can only do ONCE so we need to save it for a dire situation. overtime game seven kind of situation, you feel me? anyway mike sullivan won’t answer my emails

timbitshockey

me as an nhl reporter in a post-game press interview: so do you agree that feeling the most secure touching each other while wearing literal armour is a metaphor for the human condition? your vulnerability in these goal celebrations is offset by the fact that you aren’t actually physically touching each other; you literally can’t touch each other, and this is the only time you try. does that fact ever make you reflect on your relationships with your teammates? would you so gleefully have held him if he’d achieved a victory in his personal life, off the ice? in his home? the padding protects you in more ways than one, does it not? isn’t this the nature of human connection, played out on television screens like a soap opera? don’t you think we all watch because we want to hold our friends after their successes and console them after our losses but feel blocked by their armour? by our own?

the nhl player who just physically exerted himself for a full hour who’s still out of breath and sweating and only picked up 1/5th of what i just said: uhhhh, wh— well, it’s a team effort out there, we, uhh, give it 110%—