arsonist's lullaby

Call me Nicky. Sinners member. They call me thrill seeker, high chaser, a burden on society. I'm just trying to live a life that ignites my bones and causes my soul to dance inside my body.

[deuvaodechinita]

Tommy Martinez

[writingdotcoffee]

Be the trouble you want to see in the world.

Jacob Appelbaum, WikiLeaks (via elfiesmusings)

[nickymendcza-blog]

fatimaalhadid‌:

“I’ll never pass up alcohol.” Technically she would, but that was besides the point right now. After her sister had gone through what she had gone through, Fatima was not about to suffer the same addiction problem except with alcohol. That was not the way she wanted her life to go. “Well, that’s just a lie. You would never ignore me. Look how adorable I am.” She even presented her face with a large smile gracing her lips. Her face was her money maker after all. “Can I get points for shopping at Old Navy? I think I deserve points. Give me some points.”

"Good, that’s what I like to hear. It’s no fun if I’m drunk and you’re sober anyway, you can’t carry me home.” Though the sight would certainly be comical to witness as a third party, he was sure. “Be adorable all you want. If I gotta hear about who likes it when you slather them in peanut butter, I’m tuning you out.” There were nightmares he was willing to endure and there were others which could be stopped before they began. She could guess which one her little anecdotes fell under. “Two points. I deducted the other seven because you refuse to acknowledge that it’s a normal people store.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

lukexcalloway‌:

“That seriously gets you laid?” Luke found that somewhat hard to believe, but he didn’t want to ruin anyone’s ego just of yet. He huffed out a laugh, shaking his head, “Yeah, yeah. You don’t gotta tell me that. But until you’ve been to prison, I’d watch what you say about it.”

"It does wonders. You should try getting one for yourself. Better than angry guy, ‘cause that’s not workin’ for me.” Both palms rose in feigned defense. “Not tryin’ to say I get it, obviously I don’t, but just be careful alright? I say that as a human being to another human being. Don’t let that temper get the best of ya.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

seangldin‌:

                       “Eh,” he shrugs. “Hardly any, really.” Sean was thankful that there were at least a few that still stuck by his side through all of this. Some knew the truth, which helped, but others were just good-natured enough to forget about ‘ex-communicating’ thing completely. If everyone followed those damn rules, he’d really be in hell. “Right,” he chuckles, reluctantly. Even though it was the plan, he couldn’t help but admit but hate that part of it. “That’s gonna fucking follow me forever,” he laughs, shaking his head. 

“Wish I could say that shocked me.” A lot of the Jesters took his near banishment at face value and maintained a sort of twisted loyalty to the decision despite how honestly, in Nicky’s opinion, ridiculous it might have been. Though he rarely voiced such a sentiment, especially not to the higher ups. “Like I said, legendarily stupid.” Quiet fell between the two men for the span of only two heartbeats before he finally addressed the elephant in the room. “What are you really doin’ back here, man?”

[nickymendcza-blog]

freyarvsso‌:

          “That’s most likely why I’m scared of it. But I prefer not to live on it anyway,” she admitted. Freya had never been one to enjoy dangerous risks – she took them, sometimes, but after spending an entire relationship on the edge, she had enough of it. “Depends. You might thing the other reasons are boring. But hey, if you ever need someone to stitch you back together, I’m your girl.” Leaning slightly over the bar, she waved for the bartender, ordering them two beers. “A beer is always a good start for the evening.”

"Suit yourself, probably the safer option.” Most people simply couldn’t handle the implications of the life he chose to lead, preferring a world in which risks weren’t the prime focus. “Try me.” He highly doubted that anything about Freya would resonate as boring regardless of what came out of her mouth. “I’ll keep that in mind for when I say the wrong thing to the wrong guy.” A lazy half-smirk began to curve at his lips. “Start? Glad to see you don’t intend to drink one and run.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

smile, blushing

smile: do you prefer soft kisses or making out?

Making out, always. If there’s no bruises then there’s no point.

blushing: are you good at making people flustered?

Depends. Come a little closer and we’ll find out.

[nickymendcza-blog]

bouquet, gifts, secret admirer, red, kisses <3

bouquet: have you ever dated someone twice?

Slept with, yes. Dated? No.

gifts: do you prefer flowers or chocolates?

Neither. But if I’m the one giving, you can’t go wrong with flowers.

secret admirer: do you usually admire someone from afar or ask them on a date upfront?

I wouldn’t say I admire from afar, but I do test the waters first. You’re a bit of a desperate creep if you just go around asking every woman you meet out on a date.

red: would you date your friend’s ex?

Nah, not unless there was some otherworldly connection and I had their blessing. But even then, it’s kinda tough waters to navigate.

kisses: where is your favourite place to be kissed? why?

My favorite place ain’t exactly public appropriate. Pretty obvious why.

[nickymendcza-blog]

love letters, teddy bears, heart eyes, crush

love letters: are you a cheesy lovey dovey person?

Depending on the right person, I’ve been known to step up to the plate.

teddy bears: are you clingy?

Not in the least. Everyone deserves their independence.

heart eyes: do you send good morning and good night messages? if so, what do they say?

Again, it depends on the person and even if I did, I wouldn’t share it with you. After all, why give away trade secrets?

crush: do you have a crush?

Not at this time, no.

[nickymendcza-blog]

whipped romance and confessions

whipped: have you ever embarrassed yourself in front of your s/o or crush? if yes, tell us about it

I’m sure I’ve said some not-so-great things in front of my crushes before, but I genuinely can’t remember. I try to repress that shit as often as possible, there’s no use dwelling on what you can’t change.

romance: how many times do you say ‘i love you’ a day

Not at all. Try closer to every couple of weeks when I check in with my folks.

confessions: if you could say anything to your crush right now, what would it be?

"Wish you actually existed.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[ddevills]

valentine asks

secret admirer: do you usually admire someone from afar or ask them on a date upfront?

red roses: what’s the last thing you gave someone for valentine’s day?

box of chocolates: are you single? if so, what would you say the best thing about being single is?

love letters: are you a cheesy lovey dovey person?

bouquet: have you ever dated someone twice?

red: would you date your friend’s ex?

date: have you ever stargazed with your s/o?

hearts: did/do you write your crushes name in the margins of your books?

love: have you ever fell in love at first sight?

girls: what’s your favourite thing about dating girls?

kisses: where is your favourite place to be kissed? why?

teddy bears: are you clingy?

heart eyes: do you send good morning and good night messages? if so, what do they say?

rose petals: what is your favourite thing to do with your partner?

crush: do you have a crush?

confessions: if you could say anything to your crush right now, what would it be?

gifts: do you prefer flowers or chocolates?

smile: do you prefer soft kisses or making out?

hand holding: would you date someone who wasn’t into physical affection?

boys: what’s your favourite thing about dating boys

pink: what are your opinions on valentine’s day?

blushing: are you good at making people flustered?

whipped: have you ever embarrassed yourself in front of your s/o or crush? if yes, tell us about it

romance: how many times do you say ‘i love you’ a day

mixtape: has anyone ever made you a mixtape? if yes, what was your favourite song on it?

[nickymendcza-blog]

                   Nicky Mendoza // Aesthetic Moodboard

“They call me thrill seeker, high chaser, a burden on society. I'm just trying to live a life that ignites my bones and causes my soul to dance inside my body.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

paigesjennings‌:

starter delivery for @nickymendcza

The sound of the loud boxing match echoed in Paige’s apartment and the brunette couldn’t help a smile as she heard Nicky’s loud cheering over the fighters. It had been so long since he’d been over she’d almost cried at the sight of him standing at her doorstep with a bottle of wine and chinese takeout and as she went back to the kitchen to grab them both glasses, she felt tears prickle her eyes and she allowed herself a small moment of weakness. 

Nick and Michael could have practically been twins if it hadn’t been for Nick’s wild hair and Michael’s fair complexion and other than for their physical appearance, it would have been impossible to distinguish the two. Inseparable since what seemed like forever, it was almost rare to find one without the other trailing along somewhere in the background. To see only one of them sitting on her couch now made her feel sick but she quickly got ahold of herself and walked back to the living room, a large smile plastered on her lips.

 “Is this seriously what we’re watching?” she asked with the rise of a brow, glancing at the flat screen where two very hairy and sweaty men threw each other from either end of the ring, much to the crowd’s pleasure. “Because this ought to be a long night.”

Despite his outward jovial nature and the patience he displayed during Fight Night whilst on neutral ground with the Jesters in close proximity, Nicky’s insides were tumultuous since the passing of Michael. The first person he’d encountered in Vegas, the first face to welcome him as a hang around for the Sinners. They made quick work of a friendship, piecing together their similarities and bonding over the dinner table at Paige’s house. In quite a number of ways, it felt as though Nicky wound up as a member of their family and it was precisely why the guilt of spending so long away from her had begun to claw its way up his spine until he simply couldn’t bear it any longer.

“---I have no idea, it was just here when I turned on the TV and I got into it.” He responded honestly, albeit with a bit of a fixation on the screen as he did so. Both orders of Chinese food were set out on the coffee table and his cut lounged by itself over the back of the couch. This place always felt just like home in more than one way. “We can watch somethin’ else if you want, like a movie or whatever. Your choice.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

justinvcntura‌:

           “That’s the perfect thing ‘bout fucking around with the Prospect. He can’t say shit.” It was a total abuse of power that Justin personally wasn’t afraid to exploit. A double standard he knew, but Justin was also the type that typically did it from a good heart —- most of the time, anyway. They were his brothers, after all. Brow arched, Justin couldn’t help but turn around and eye the fellow patched brother. “But now you’ve got me fuckin’ curious over what you can’t answer for. What, you got a worse kink or somethin’?” Even with his brows furrowed, Justin couldn’t help that obnoxious smirk that crossed his lips to showcase that this was yet another time Justin was messing around with the guy. However, the promise of getting his favorite booze in his system couldn’t even help the immediate flash of bitter distaste to cross over Justin’s features. “Nah, haven’t seen him. I’m surprised he’s even got the balls to come around, even on mutual territory. Not surprised he didn’t approach me though. What’s he sniffin’ around for?”

"That’s twisted, man. I’m down for it.” Every taunt was made in jest, none of the men holding enough venom in their systems to genuinely have it out for one of their brothers. They were bonded for life, which altered the very nature of every interaction. “You assumptions are appalling, but no. I’ve just woken up next to some questionable people like everyone has.” His own smirk curved along his lips before Nicky elaborated. “Remember that one Halloween party? The girl dressed like a Christmas tree to be ironic or whatever? Yeah, there was tinsel in my bed for about... two weeks.” The waitress set down their drinks and the younger of the pair could only nod in agreement with his VP. “You and me both, but he’s lurking somewhere. He mentioned somethin’ about habits bein’ hard to break, but I’m not buying it. I think he wants back--- lowkey, of course. He’d never just say it like a goddamn adult.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

fatimaalhadid‌:

“Okay, I will not deny two shots.” She gave the waitress a smile as she walked past to take their orders. Then Fatima had realized he didn’t say which shots to get. “Whiskey!” She wasn’t sure if the woman heard her, but she would probably be fine with whatever shot she was given. Unless it was cheap alcohol. She moved to sit down on one of his legs before turning to him. “How dare you. I’ll have you know that my graphic details are very entertaining and you should appreciate it very much. And that’s all I’ll say about that.” She paused not even for a minute. “Actually, no it isn’t. This outfit isn’t even that expensive. I got it from that weird Old Navy store.”

"That’s more like it.” At her attempts to call out to the waitress, the man shook dark locks. Did it honestly matter which liquor she brought back? Anything would be leagues better than continuing the evening sober. “Your graphic details are the bane of my existence and if I have to hear about someone in my club, I’ll genuinely ignore you.” A singular hand rose in exasperation, only to fall upon his free leg as hues lifted towards the ceiling. “For the last time, Old Navy is where normal people shop.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

farrahperetti‌:

              “Pretend, huh? And you’re so real?” Farrah asked as both hands dropped down to her side, before eventually taking up that place on her hip. “I would like to have all the faith in the world in you, but who knows? You haven’t put your money where your mouth is for me. For all I know, you could just be talking to talk.” A wide smile then began to approach her lips, facing the Sinner member. “For all I know, the boy with the sweetheart look and the leather cut would throw me in the ring with a scrapper.”

"I can be when I want to, it’s about motivation and the right cause.” After all, he didn’t exactly blow through cash without ample reason. Paradise simply happened to fit the standard. “There’s more to life than throwing bills around, chica. Thought I earned a little good will with how generous and downright saintly I’ve been.” Not that Nicky was terribly capable of being anything else, southern gentleman that he was. “You think I’m a sweetheart, huh? Careful, Farrah. You almost sound like you enjoy hanging out with me.” The bare bones of a boyish smile began to spread across his features. “I’d never. Can’t risk that face.”

[nickymendcza-blog]

freyarvsso‌:

       “The edge is a scary place.” Freya had been there once before, and she was happy that she walked away from it. But she wasn’t here to tell people how they should live their lives. Moving through the crowd, upstairs and towards the bar, she looked back over her shoulder with a grin stretching over her lips. “There’s more than one reason to like me, but a free drink is the start. What do you want?”

"Only for people who aren’t familiar with it.” After all, Nicky practically existed with a bungee cord tied around his waist, always prepared to traipse along the edge of oblivion without thought to consequence. “Do I get to know the others?” He canted curled locks to the side, as if studying her for said characteristics. “Just a beer. For now. What’re you having?”