- have a huge, old house, which they divided equally between them
- dark and Author share the library (they rotate)
- google has the basement
- Wilford has the second half of the first floor (the other half is the kitchen and living room)
- Author also sorta has the attic and hordes books up there
- that makes Dark kind mad
- wilf grows fruit and pretty flowers in the garden
- the garden is something all of them except Google take care of
- wilf’s room his bubblegum pink and decorated like a stereotypical teenage girl’s
- we’re talking posters of bands, stuffed animals on a shelf, a writing desk that’s not in any way neat, big fluffy carpet, giant purple comforters for the bed
- probably snuck a cat or bunny in with him that the others don’t know about
- dark’s ‘room’ is a loft above the book shelves in the library
- he had a few fluffy pillows and blankets, but he’s the only one in the house that doesn’t need to sleep
- no one knows how he gets up into the loft because there’s no ladder or anything
- he also has laid claim to a big leather chair which “makes him feel powerful”
- he painted his loft a dark red and has a window that looks out over the garden which he has black curtains for
- google doesn’t decorate his room
- he has his charging station and the whole room is made of concrete
- author has the attic and it’s painted mint green
- it’s pretty empty besides his old and broken down writing desk, bookshelf of his novels, a few drawers of clothes, and a full sized bed with floral bedding
- the four of them have agreed to let wilf do the cooking because dark doesn’t know what an oven is, Google is too rough, and authors probably lit the kitchen on fire before
- they have also agreed that once a week they’ll all eat together (or at least sit down at the same table)
- if you’re in the mix things change a bit - they all fight for your attention by doing different things - google analyzes what gets your attention the most, author tries to court you, dark tries to impress you, Wilford tries to woo you - they all want your attention - you probably get the spare room next to the library, decorated how you please - you probably have a shelf dedicated to gifts they give you, notes from author, pictures and stuffed animals from wilf, and things tailored to your preferences from dark and Google - spending time in the garden is lots of fun, especially guessing who planted what - dinners are more often with everyone with you there, because none of them take the chance to leave - taco Tuesday - movie nights include you sitting in the middle of the couch being squished by the four of them - also you always get to choose the movie because they can never decide and they take your word as law - you get pampered - dark gives back massages and wilf gives foot massages - Author will write to calm you down and google plays music - not to mention, since wilf is a celebrity and Dark has an unknown source of income, also author is a world renounced author and google can print money, you don’t really even need to work - they probably have fights over you all the time - they also briefly got into a contest of who can get you the best outfit, which no one won because Author kept buying flannels, wilf was pink lingerie, and dark was fancy outfits, google could have won because he has your search history but he doesn’t know where to get any of it - also google has your search history so no more porn - this is an AU where wilf accidentally gave google admin permissions so he can do whatever the fuck he wants - also I should add, if google does find porn he will immediately tell the others what it is and when it was looked up - meaning all four of them will be aware when you do something like that - be prepared to get offered a friends with benefits relationship
