you want to be mommyâs adjective noun, donât you, pet name? you want to verb and verb for mommy like a good gender
you want to be mommy's weird potato, don't you, Brian? you want to skip and somersault like a good jester
occasionally subtle
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
$LAYYYTER
noise dept.

Origami Around
Sweet Seals For You, Always
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Aqua Utopiaď˝ćľˇăŽĺşă§č¨ćśăç´Ąă

Kiana Khansmith
Jules of Nature
Xuebing Du
Monterey Bay Aquarium

if i look back, i am lost
Today's Document
Three Goblin Art
AnasAbdin

#extradirty
DEAR READER
cherry valley forever
sheepfilms

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@nightmurk
you want to be mommyâs adjective noun, donât you, pet name? you want to verb and verb for mommy like a good gender
you want to be mommy's weird potato, don't you, Brian? you want to skip and somersault like a good jester
https://twitter.com/birdtickler/status/1552657242909904897?s=21&t=q4JEDIALmV-cAjcoEOypdw
ok so I looked it up, and it turns out they made a track out of PVC pipes, down a hill. The owner didn't realise PVC expanded in the heat, so on a turn the track just fell apart and the dude inside went over a fucking free way and into a swamp.
The funniest part is that the inspector was watching the whole time, and once the ball stopped he left without saying anything. Park management just shut it down then and there.
"The ball cleared a small hill, briefly going airborne, then zipped right across Route 94, the two-lane road splitting the park. Cars honked and slammed on their brakes. If there had been opposing traffic, Frank would have become part of a real-life game of Pong, volleying from one bumper to another.
Still in pursuit, we followed the ball toward a small lake in Motor World that had been earmarked for a fleet of tiny bumper boats for children. The area wasnât open yet, but the empty boats were being tested and floated on the surface. The ball soared over the grass and smashed into several of them, scattering the others with rippling waves from the impact, which launched some of the boats several feet in the air.
Charlie and Ken waded into the water looking for the hatch. After some difficulty, they got it open. Charlie pulled Frank out by grabbing him under his armpits like a baby. Frank crawled up the bank, coughing and sputtering. He splayed across the grass as we all stared at the ball, which bobbed in the water like it was attached to a fishing lure.
We did not ask for the inspectorâs report, nor did we ever hear of one being filed. Ken Bailey returned to Canada. The snow-makers cleared away the PVC. Told to dispose of the Bailey Ball, they rolled it into the woods, where it remained for many years."
I don't know that this beats the teeth story, but it's pretty great.
KICK THE CAN!
Letâs play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.
To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.
the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now
And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!
great job everyone lets hit the showers
Not again
gentle reminder that you canât get this kind of nonsense from any other site
This thread is almost eight years old and it has damn well earned its place among the Tumblr pantheon as a Heritage Postâ˘ď¸
>First, weâve discovered that about a quarter of all the internet connection in or out of the house were ad related. In a few hours, thatâs about 10,000 out of 40,000 processed.
>We also discovered that every link on Twitter was blocked. This was solved by whitelisting the https://t.co domain.
>Once out browsing the Web, everything is loading pretty much instantly. It turns out most of that Page Loading malarkey weâve been accustomed to is related to sites running auctions to sell Ad space to show you before the page loads. All gone now.
>We then found that the Samsung TV (which I really like) is very fond of yapping all about itself to Samsung HQ. All stopped now. No sign of any breakages in its function, so Iâm happy enough with that.
>The primary source of distress came from the habitual Lemmings player in the house, who found they could no longer watch ads to build up their in-app gold. A workaround is being considered for this.
>The next ambition is to advance the Ad blocking so that it seamlessly removed YouTube Ads. This is the subject of ongoing research, and tinkering continues. All in all, a very successful experiment.
>Certainly this exceeds my equivalent childhood project of disassembling and assembling our rotary dial telephone. A project whose only utility was finding out how to make the phone ring when nobody was calling.
>Update: All4 on the telly appears not to have any ads any more. Goodbye Arnold Clarke!
>Lemmings problem now solved.
>Can confirm, after small tests, that RTĂ Player ads are now gone and the player on the phone is now just delivering swift, ad free streams at first click.
>Some queries along the lines of âAre you not stealing the internet?â Firstly, this is my network, so I may set it up as I please (or, you know, my son can do it and I can give him a stupid thumbs up in response). But there is a wider question, based on the ads=internet model.
>Iâm afraid I passed the You Wouldnât Download A Car point back when I first installed ad-blocking plug-ins on a browser. But consider my chatty TV. Individual consumer choice is not the method of addressing pervasive commercial surveillance.
>Should I feel morally obliged not to mute the TV when the ads come on? No, this is a standing tension- a clash of interests. But I think my interest in my family not being under intrusive or covert surveillance at home is superior to the ad companyâs wish to profile them.
>Aside: 24 hours of Pi Hole stats suggests that Samsung TVs are very chatty. 14,170 chats a day.
>YouTube blocking seems difficult, as the ads usually come from the same domain as the videos. Havenât tried it, but all of the content can also be delivered from a no-cookies version of the YouTube domain, which doesnât have the ads. I have asked my son to poke at that idea.
fastest reblog in the west
Yeppers. :)
reblogging for study later AND to spread the info.
Seriously, get and run PiHole if you can. It changes your internet experience so much for the better. I get shocked when I visit a website when I'm someone else's network, by just how many ads the internet is flooded with now. Take back control.
so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god
okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now iâm thinkingâŚ.maybe this is the good luck post
âŚ..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment
likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post
i need all the help i can get for finals
Hey so
the last time I reblogged this post right before I got a great job, in a permanent work-from-home position, with benefits, retirement, and a salary literally 3x what I was making before, doing something I really like.Â
So you know.Â
This might be the real one, yâall.
I could use some luck
Goodbye white people no more cheeseboard
What have white people ever done to deserve this?
History - Wikipedia
idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????
'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa
THIRTY TWO??????
Listen that doesnât even account for all the weird shit local farmers are getting up to.
May I present the best apple:
the world is so big and beautiful
can grief stop hiding in the half smoked cigarettes my impoverished father would've farmed from the cracks in the sidewalk outside of a convenience store? the same half smoked cigarettes that eventually killed him of lung cancer? that he insisted on taking secret puffs of until he literally couldn't breathe anymore? it's an ironically cruel place for a fond memory to be
my dad would've smoked that
this made me howl with laughter so thank you
So can non-disabled people stop doing that thing where they act like itâs morally righteous to force yourself to work while youâre sick and assume taking sick days automatically equates to laziness. Any time now. Thatâd be great
The leader of the scout group I help out at approached me out of hours while I was walking to work to tell me that people have been talking behind my back because I missed more sessions than I attended this term (on account of having Covid twice) and was like âWe all show up when weâre sick because we take responsibilityâ and I felt really shitty and guilty and cried the whole workday then I got home and told my mum and she was like âSo they want you to throw up on the kids? Thatâs dodgy. They donât even pay you. Stop goingâ and a wave of serenity hit me like a bus
>listen to pirated album
>it's good
thank you piracy
>listen to pirated album
>it's bad
thank you piracy (for saving me from spending money on that)
This will never NOT be funny
Iâm so glad this is on tumblr
My favourite thing about this is, he didnât even have to call him âCaptainâ he could have used the screen-name but he was SO MARRIED TO THE IMMERSION that he DID.
Passenger: CAPTAIIIIN!!!
Captain: y-yeah?
Passenger: LOOOOOOOK!
(FULL BLAST PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN MUSIC)
my fav.
ânever kill yourselfâ is such a funny phrase to me that i think itâs accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ânever kill yourselfâ enough times as a joke and maybe you wonât try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore
i made this image for the express purpose of this
breakfast from when before i eated it
okay. here is my breakfast from before time began
ok this looks ultra mega based, are you kidding me? can you imagine the bullshit i could get up to with this bad boy? fuck yes i want ten
Wait are iPhone bros coping because Apple has to be more universal? Lol.
Boo hoo i'll be able to add more physical storage to my phone and be able to change out batteries if they degrade as well as all these other optional features I won't have to touch
Continuing in the trend of political cartoons depicting milquetoast moderate positions seem so much cooler and more badass than they are
I love how they add totally absurd things no one is asking for to make the idea look crazy. And still, I must emphasize, failing to make this look like a bad idea.
"Is this what you want? Is this ugly stupid bullcrap what you want??" the biggest loudest idiot in the room asks, holding up a picture of the hottest looking shit I've ever seen