A little thing I headcannon is that Andrew never asks where Neil is. Neil is CONSTANTLY asking where Andrew is if he hasn’t seen him for approximately 0.5 seconds and even Jean notices how they give “lingering looks when one fell out of orbit for too long”, but Andrew never asks, wanting conceal to the others how much Neil is a weak spot for him. Instead, his eyes slide across the room, scanning, and if he can’t see Neil then Andrew simply gets up and goes in search of him, he knows all of his spots anyways. The foxes, initially just put Andrew’s abrupt leave up to his blatantly disrespectful self, deciding he wasn’t interested enough in the conversation, so they don’t really care. However, that isn’t until they notice the pattern. First, Renee, then Dan and Aaron, and soon the others catch on. They observe the way Andrew’s fingers start tapping at his sides when his head swivels round and cannot find his specific ginger. They observe the way he gets up immediately and strides towards the door. They also observe the way Andrew hands still slightly as Matt says, “he’s on a run” or Kevin tells him Neil’s just practicing on the court. Andrew doesn’t acknowledge it openly of course, he never asked and would’ve been able to find him himself easily, but they all don’t miss the way his head lowers for a second, giving a subtle nod, placated by the fact someone always knows where Neil is. I guess they all know the alternative, when his hands were shaking, wrapped round Kevin’s neck in Baltimore. He didn’t ask, “Where’s Neil?”, he screamed it. And the others didn’t know. And Andrew couldn’t find him.
A chapter teaser for the musically inclined. The soundtracks are really for my own amusement, but I love making them. They're the song version of the chapter arc with freer feelings than the characters allow themselves to say. Like a script within the script! Enjoy! <3
fics where andrew is clearly into neil and neil is insanely oblivious ?
THANK YOU
Y’all can’t get enough of this combo! Enjoy. -A
previous recs:
Oblivious Neil/Crushing Andrew here
Oblivious Neil here
‘Wanted: Random Guy’ here
‘Andrew’s Kill List’ here
‘I Hate Him’ and ‘Unexpected Findings’ here
‘All Of This Turbulence Wasn’t Forecasted’ here
‘Need You Now’ and ‘Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy’ here
‘I been here all along (so why can't you see?)’ here
‘The air gets thin on top of the mountain’ here
‘Witching You A Happy Holiday’ here
‘Hold each other’ ch 34 here
‘Lonely Hearts’ and ‘All For The Playlist’ here
‘A Splash of Color’ here
‘gardens /'gärd(ə)n/,’ ‘Free cigarettes,’ and ‘The New Normal’ (completed) here
‘fearing, doubting, dreaming’ here
‘Lost Cause’ and ‘Neil Josten Builds Himself a Life’ here
‘to know a man’ here
‘Can I finally stop running now?’ here
‘selbstzerstörend, nicht dumm’ and ‘"Vodka solves everything" - Kevin Day’ here
‘Pebble Brain’ here
‘Legally Yours’ series here
‘Neil Josten versus November 12th’ here (updated)
‘Lifeline’ here (updated)
‘Why do we feel alone?’ here (completed)
‘Kiss It Better?’ here (updated)
‘Insecure Neil’ series part 1 here
‘Rebel Rebel’ and ‘Disparity,’ plus ‘penchant’ and ‘There Was Only One Pumpkin’ (oblivious andrew) here
more gay disaster/piningandrew:
‘triptych’ here
‘always you’ here
‘Abram, My Dear (I’ll Find You)’ here
‘motion sickness’ here
‘I'm Addicted to the Dark’ here
‘to the moon and back’ series here
‘What's The Safest Way To Say 'I Love You'?’ and ‘We Never Go Out Of Style’ here
‘blue eyes and coffee grounds’ here
‘Do I want to know if this feeling goes both ways?’ here
‘a runaway walks into a bar’ series and ‘~Runaways and Travelers~’ series part 1 here
‘fragile’ here
‘Flavors of Fall,’ ‘swing me your bones,’ ‘Sugar & Spice (and everything... nice?),’ ‘do you like scary movies?’ and ‘Andrew Minyard Loves Fall…’ here
‘Festive FEELINGS! (Oh, and shopping)’ here
‘Okay, fine’ here
‘Your love is my drug’ here (completed)
‘System Error’ here
‘Follow You Through The Dark,’ ‘the hunger at the heart of me,’ and ‘quicksand’ here
you may also like:
Neil pines, Andrew is (varying degrees of) oblivious here
andreil roommates with mutual pining here
BFFs Andreil with pining here
Staff Recs Ace Spectrum fics here
‘Out Here in Plain Sight’ here
‘Surrounded By You: Andreil’ here
‘a whole 'nother high’ here
‘Broken promises’ here (kandreil)
‘cake and other postponed pleasures’ here
Lost in a Haze by shadowdreams [Rated G, 34277 Words, Complete, 2026]
“Hello boys.” Thea sat down beside Kevin, setting her tray on the table. “What’s up?”
Kevin didn’t miss a beat. “Andrew has lost his prowess and is asking me for advice.”
“I didn’t,” Andrew said. “And I haven’t.”
Thea blinked. “Prowess as in… performance issues?”
“Yes,” Kevin said at the same time as Andrew’s decisive “No.”
Or: Andrew hooks up with a hot guy. It doesn’t go to plan.
Tempt You (evocatio) by capoismail [Rated T, 6308 Words, Complete, Locked]
Andrew always picks Neil up in his car, because he's convinced it's the only way he's allowed to have time alone with him.
Loosely inspired by Tempt You (evocatio) by Nothing But Thieves
What A Way To Meet by P234age [Not Rated, 28083 Words, Incomplete, Updated Dec 2025]
Neil is an emergency physician and Andrew is a pro exy player who keeps finding himself in Neil's ER. Oblivious flirting ensues.
Kevin's there too. Just...being Kevin.
Nachtschwärmer by sun_litsoul [Rated T, 6928 Words, Complete, 2025]
Neil had obliviously tumbled around the topic of Andrew's attraction towards him, for quite a while, and Andrew knew that it was a matter of time that someone would point to it so bluntly that Neil would be unable to overlook it. Honestly, Andrew was surprised it had taken so long. Andrew knew Neil would demand answers eventually and judging by the tone of Neil's voice, that moment had apparently arrived.
It was no secret, and besides, it wouldn’t lead to anything anyway. Andrew decided he might as well get it over with, so he lifted his gaze up to meet Neil's glare.
or
Andrew’s POV of chapter 3 of The King’s Men
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: recreational drug use
across the sand by SaltedKetchup [Rated M, 6805 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2026]
“It’s just,” said Allison, the ghost of a giggle still haunting her words, “After a year of fucking him, it seems kind of late to develop a celebrity crush now.”
i could talk to you all night by pipedreamaddy [Rated T, 7310 Words, Complete, 2026, Locked]
The first time that Andrew saw Neil Josten, he knew that he had fallen head over heels. He wasn’t beautiful in the way that you would expect one to be. But he was beautiful. The way that the sun seemed to highlight the auburn of his hair, and the crystal blue of his eyes…
-
Or the Monsters are in high school, and Andrew is hopelessly in love with Neil.
Red by Ren4YourLives (TheRoadtoHell) [Rated M, 4280 Words, Incomplete, Updated July 2025]
When he turns around, Andrew makes and maintains eye contact with the pretty red-haired blue-eyed bastard who had the audacity to make Andrew do his job two fucking minutes before closing, like a goddamn psychopath.
Or
Andrew is a barista and Neil comes in two minutes before closing. Andrew is very pissed and very horny about it.
In Bloom by readingnook [Rated M, 12856 Words, Complete, 2025]
Tattoo artist Neil develops Hanahaki and is very confused because he doesn’t swing. He enlists the help of the florist next door to help.
vamp Neil series by Kingfluffkinss [Rated M/E, Collection, 2 complete works, Updated 2025]
Part 1: Hungry, but I've already eaten [M, 8257 Words]
Malnourished, runaway vampire Neil gets more than he bargained for when his latest meal offers him a deal- a steady supply of blood in exchange for the guy's life. Neil can't afford to leave behind human witnesses, and Andrew's blood was repulsively sweet. Nothing good will come out of this. Despite everything, he finds himself agreeing.
Part 2: Starving, yet I'm finally eating [E, 5342 Words]
“I was promised a meal,” he said, the double meaning woven into his words. They echoed in their shared space.
The tips of Andrew’s ears were inventing a new hue of red. His lips parted slightly, but the blase expression remained. Neil had the uncontrollable urge to wipe it off his face.
“And I’m offering myself on the platter. The sacrifices we must make.” Andrew’s voice didn’t waver, but it was a near thing. Neil tilted his head just slightly, his hunting instincts thrashing against the cages of his rational mind, begging him to move and feed. The fangs elongated on their own accord.
“Far be it from me to leave you unsatisfied.”
---
Aka, Andrew wears a skirt and Neil comes to a few realizations, then does something about them.
tw: blood, tw: explicit sexual content
The Art of Petty Revenge by foxinky [Rated G, 4607 Words, Incomplete, Updated Feb 2025]
Neil’s life was perfectly fine—until Aaron started dating Kevin and decided to move into their house. Kevin and Neil's house. Without asking Neil. Betrayed and slightly furious, Neil did what any sane person would do: he got himself a fake boyfriend to make Kevin suffer.
Aaron is disgusted by the idea of Andrew with Neil.
Kevin is disgusted by the idea of Neil with Andrew, his boyfriend’s twin.
The choice is perfect. And Andrew? Andrew is bored and completely in love with Neil. Living with him doesn’t sound so bad.
bunny wabbit by bees_in_eyeliner [Rated T, 2654 Words, Complete, 2025]
It’s the hoodie that Andrew notices first, bright white and loose with a fluffy hood pulled over auburn hair. The only spots of color being the pink pocket on the belly and the pink insides of the two floppy ears attached to the hood.
Next is the thighs, lean, honey brown and peppered with freckles. Andrew’s eyes catch on a thin white scar slicing through the soft skin of his left inner thigh. Andrew can’t see any pants. Is he not wearing pants?
or
What if Neil and Kevin were one year ahead of the Monsters at Palmetto and Neil had to protect Kevin for his first year?
or
Neil puts on a rabbit hoodie and ruins freshman Andrew's day
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction
See Me Bare My Teeth For You by weeping_over_books [Rated T, 2049 Words, Complete, 2024]
Andrew's confession to Neil at Eden's Twilight from Andrew's point of view.
tw: implied/referenced abuse
corndogs? sweet! by williams_strawberries [Rated G, 8933 Words, Complete, 2024]
Neil Josten hates his job. He doesn't like candy, or kids, or parties. But Candytown USA was the only job he's managed to maintain, and he has nothing better to do.
When his only regular, a man in strange, corndog themed attire, starts asking 'personal' questions, Neil has to contend with his worst enemy; feelings. Will he be able to solve the mystery of the corndog man's interest, before he's consumed by the ghosts of his past?
tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: anxiety
ink and thorn by l_mialamia_l [Rated T, 25018 Words, Complete, AFTG Fall Exchange 2024]
Neil Josten had known Andrew Minyard for approximately two minutes and thirty seven seconds, and he already knew he’d hate him for the rest of his life. Andrew, for his part, seemed to have hated Neil before they even met, so Neil felt he was justified. He gave a wistful goodbye to his resolution not to make any enemies in his new life. He’d lasted, what, five hours? Not bad, considering his track record.
. . .
A light fantasy flower shop x tattoo parlor au, with Andreil as rival business owners and neighbors who reluctantly fall in love.
they write books about this sort of thing by kieka [Rated T, 6433 Words, Complete, 2024]
Neil turns his attention back to Andrew, watching as he fixes a jammed printer by kicking the tray with full force. “What do you know about him?”
“He went to juvie for a few years,” Matt says. “There’s a rumor that he’s killed someone, or maybe it was two people. Anyways, people call him a psychopath. He always carries at least ten knives on him at all times.”
“Ten knives,” Neil repeats blandly.
“Just telling you what I’ve heard,” Matt says with a shrug.
-
The new librarian has a reputation. Neil doesn't believe any of it.
How to say 'fuck u' in flower languageby ellaizia [Rated G, 1558 Words, Complete, 2026]
“I’m gonna murder you, right now,” Neil hissed through his teeth. “Slowly and very, very painfully."
“How exactly? By talking me to death with your magnificent accent?” Andrew deadpanned out of the blue.
OR
Neil and Andrew pretended to "hate" each other for so long no one believes it anymore.
Lonely is the night by Mummadoof [Rated E, 35606 Words, Complete, 2025]
Andrew just wanted some ice-cream, instead he gets a beautiful, feral, dumpster fire of a man. And pot plants. And some cats.
The Trials and Tribulations of the Invisible Sexuality by areadingmetaphor [Rated M, 23629 Words, Incomplete, Updated Oct 2025]
Neil joins an a-spec group. As he attends more and more meetings he starts to realize exactly where on the ace spectrum he falls. This might or might not be directly related to Andrew Minyard.
tw: recreational drug use
Neil thinks he's good at reading people… meta by @the-gay-cousin-666 [Tumblr, 2023]
Art
That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you complete scene comic by @smokesontheroof
Andrew is oh so subtle art by @teomoy
That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you. art by @cowboymoonking
”Why am I so gay?” art by @danzeebee
what andrew has to deal with at practice art by @oyabun-draws
Happy Late Valentine’s Day yearners comic by @zaiciart
tiny gay disaster art by @/remuslupinsmoustache on instagram
We love to call Neil oblivious or dense for not noticing he was in a slowburn romance with Andrew but how many of us were smacked in the face with the “that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you”the first time you read it then of course you go back and reread and andreil was very obviously there the whole time you just get so caught up in thinking like Neil Josten that you also become oblivious so props to Nora for that
imagine a sweet but somewhat prudish 64 year old woman who worries about sexuality in media to the point that she once called her adult child for reassurance that they didn’t accidentally get exposed to pornography on the internet as a teen. now imagine that she studied english literature & shares this love with her husband of 40+ years to the point that they almost named their children after the brontë sisters. & now imagine the two of them taking a quiet valentine’s day excursion to see a matinee movie based off the book of their beloved emily brontë. & now imagine this woman, my mother, sitting through emerald fennell’s “wuthering heights”
Andrew’s hostility toward Neil is often misread as dislike, resentment, or territorial aggression. On the surface, it looks like contempt: the threats, the knives, the constant testing of boundaries. But canon makes something else painfully clear.
Andrew is not reacting to Neil as a person.
He is reacting to what Neil activates in him.
Andrew Minyard has spent his entire life surviving by emotional minimization. He learned early that feeling deeply is dangerous: not because emotions are bad, but because they are exploitable. Caring gives people leverage. Attachment gives them access. Wanting anything gives the world something to take away.
So Andrew learned to flatten himself.
He narrowed his emotional range down to what was necessary for survival. Control. Precision. Distance. He does not hope. He does not trust. He does not want. Those are not personality quirks: they are defensive structures built to keep him alive.
Then Neil Josten appears.
Neil is reckless in a way Andrew doesn’t understand at first. He violates Andrew’s expectations of fear. He does not respond correctly to threats. He doesn’t back down, but he doesn’t escalate either. He doesn’t try to dominate Andrew or soothe him or fix him. He just stays.
And worse: Neil mirrors Andrew.
Neil understands trauma without asking for explanations. He recognizes rules instinctively. He respects consent without being told why it matters. He meets Andrew’s violence with clarity instead of panic. For Andrew, this is destabilizing.
Because it means Andrew is seen.
Andrew doesn’t hate Neil because Neil is annoying or intrusive. He hates Neil because Neil bypasses his defenses without force. Because Neil proves that understanding is possible. Because Neil makes Andrew feel something dangerously close to recognition.
Andrew’s anger spikes not when Neil is loud, but when Neil is quiet. When Neil notices. When Neil refuses to be afraid. When Neil chooses Andrew even when walking away would be safer.
Feeling is the real threat here.
Andrew feels responsibility for Neil long before he admits it. He positions himself between Neil and danger instinctively. He tracks Neil’s presence. He reacts faster when Neil is threatened. These are not choices Andrew wants to be making.
They happen automatically.
And that terrifies him.
Because Andrew knows what happens when you care and the world finds out. He knows how people punish attachment. He knows how love can be weaponized. Drake didn’t hurt Andrew because Andrew was weak: he hurt him because Andrew existed in proximity to something someone else wanted.
Andrew refuses to let that happen again.
So he tells himself he hates Neil.
Hate is safe. Hate is manageable. Hate doesn’t demand vulnerability. Hate gives Andrew permission to push Neil away, to hurt him, to test whether Neil will leave.
But Neil doesn’t leave.
Neil stays with the same stubborn refusal Andrew himself once had to dying quietly.
And Andrew feels more.
He feels anger sharpen into fear.
Fear twist into protectiveness.
Protectiveness rot into attachment.
This is why Andrew’s rules become so important once Neil matters.
“Yes or no.”
“Do you want this?”
“Don’t touch me.”
These rules aren’t just about Andrew’s body; they’re about containing the damage of feeling. They are his attempt to create a world where closeness does not automatically equal harm. Where wanting someone doesn’t mean losing yourself.
Neil respects those rules without resentment.
And that is when Andrew’s hatred becomes impossible to maintain.
Andrew hates Neil for making him feel because feeling has done nothing but get him hurt.
He hates that feeling means risk.
He hates that risk means loss.
He hates that Neil is worth it anyway.
Andrew’s arc is not about learning to love. He already knows how.
It’s about learning that love does not always destroy the person who feels it.
And Neil Josten, persistent, infuriating, unkillable Neil, is living proof of that.
Andrew doesn’t hate Neil.
He hates that Neil makes him human in a world that taught him humanity was a liability.
"I like you" isn't just a stepping stone to "I love you" - it is a distinct narrative beat in its own right.
As the audience, we already know that Ilya loves Shane because we heard him say it in Russian. But we also know that love is not enough - Shane loves Rose but they weren't compatible. Sometimes love isn't enough, for a variety of reasons.
This is why Shane and Ilya are terrified of coming to the cottage. Because we still don't know if they're compatible beyond the incredibly hot sex and psychic level hockey passes. The tuna melt date was nice before Shane crashed out, but that was just one afternoon.
"I like you" is the missing piece in their relationship. I know that I love you and I desire you and we play good hockey together, but do I like you?
The cottage scenes answer: yes. I like playing with you and I like cooking with you and I like talking to you and I like sharing space with you and I like sleeping next to you and I like waking up with you. I like you.
I like you and I love you and I still have no idea how we can possibly make this work but I really want to figure it out.
Anyone who is mad at Kevin for being sad about Riko's death but ISN'T mad at Aaron or Neil for being sad about their mom's death is missing the point actually
Anyone who is mad at Kevin for his passivity and submission but ISN'T mad at Jean for his dismissal of his desires and worth or at Andrew for his repression of his desires and hope is missing the point actually
Anyone who is mad at Kevin for saying it's easier to be straight but ISN'T mad at Andrew for believing it's easier to not want things or at Jeremy for believing it's easier to pursue Law like his family wants is missing the point actually
