a shitty meme dealer

i am cringe but i am free

[isisisak]

so we all agree ilya puts his head under shanes shirt right? you know what else he does? he blows fucking raspberries on his stomach!

its rare enough that shane never fully expects it and he makes a sound thats somewhere between a gasp a shriek and a giggle and tries to push ilya out of his shirt and off of him

[dailyhollanov]

HEATED RIVALRY | 1.02

[thatonekimgirl]

Shane being so ecstatic to discover he and Ilya are exclusive is the JUST THE CUTEST.

bonus: the softest kiss

[samwwise]

[gaynehollander]

I feel like people tend to not fully recognise just how momentous a step the cottage truly is and I know that sounds categorically insane because of how obsessed we all are with the cottage but bear with me.

Prior to the cottage Shane and Ilya have literally only ever spent time together one-on-one when they happen to be in the same place and, even then, usually only for long enough to hook up. We can theorise about potential nights where they went multiple rounds and spent time together in between but there's not much evidence in canon for that. The only times they have ever really spent time together alone outside of meeting their immediate physical need for one another are 1) very briefly on the rooftop, 2) in Boston (and we all know how that ended) 3) in the hospital - and two of those instances can only really be counted in minutes.

Now they’re looking at a trip, booked in advance, with the express purpose of spending time together and not just a night or a day or two. Two whole weeks. If you’ve seen that post that calculates how often Shane and Ilya likely met up throughout the years you’ll know we’re looking at maybe 20 times total, throughout the years. If we assume they spent a total of two hours together each time (which I believe to be an overestimate, especially with the early years) that’s a total of 40 hours, spread out over 7 years of hooking up. And now they have two weeks. That’s over eight times the amount of hours they have spent together up until now, combined.

And, of course, as the viewer we already know they love each other. We’ve been screaming at our television screens for several episodes now, begging them to be open and honest with each other. Pleading with them to actually talk to one another. We are so beyond ready for the cottage by the time it arrives and, because we are aware of TV tropes, we are pretty sure the season will end with Shane and Ilya resolving their issues and coming together. It feels like a foregone conclusion to the viewer but to them, as people, it Absolutely Isn’t.

We, the audience, know that they are already in love by the time the cottage comes around. They know that they’re already in love by the time the cottage comes around (although they may not know that the other person is too). What they don’t know is whether they actually function together outside of their crazy sexual compatibility. They don’t know if they actually make sense in the quiet moments. Whether silences will be comfortable. Whether the air will feel heavy between them. They don’t know the shape of each other in everyday life and they don’t know how they fit around each other. This is also why the “I like you” scene is so important, because that truly was an unanswered question before the cottage. Yes, they love each other but do they actually enjoy each others' company?

In that context, Ilya coming to the cottage isn’t just a huge step, it’s a fucking leap into the abyss.

And I know that I'm preaching to the choir. I know we've seen the posts about how nervous they must have been, how brave they both were to follow through on that plan and finally give themselves room to figure themselves out, but it was literally an insane level of commitment from two people who have spent years running from their feelings. It bears repeating; the cottage was monumental and that cannot be overstated.

[softshane]

ilya is in one of his depressive episodes and shane tries to cheer him up by telling him about all the things shane loves about him. ilya is quiet for a moment and then mumbles, mainly to himself, "noo don’t kill yourself you’re so sexy aha" before bursting into laughter and shane has no idea what’s going on but it’s the first time he‘s seen ilya even so much as smile in days, so he‘ll take it

[kateantropova]

sometimes a baby can be a 5ft11 man i guess

[ilya-rozanova]

heated rivalry: endless gifs

[hr-rep]

Shane posts a selfie where he’s in his glasses and all the responses are just versions of this. He thinks he is being bullied. Ilya understands perfectly what is being conveyed.

[hutsonwoolyums]

Obviously Ilya is a chronic clothes thief, we see this at the cottage, but after they move in together he starts getting fuzzy on the details of what belongs to whom. One day he’s folding laundry, holds up a t-shirt, and genuinely has no idea whose it is. He just folds it and puts it in Shane’s drawer.

And then at some point it stops even being a question. There’s no “his” or “mine,” it’s all just theirs.

And one day Shane comes home and says, “I got us some new socks,” and Ilya tackles him to the floor.

[anonymoustigress]

Anytime Ilya wants a new jumper or smth he tries it on to see how it feels and if there’s any annoying tags or seams or it’s the wrong materials he won’t get it cause he knows Shane won’t wear it

[evyisaks]

- can't just stay here with you forever? can I? - you can.

[levok]

Part two: The SKAM blueprints of Heated Rivalry eps 4.

[laviejaguardia]

I love the everyone wants to fuck Shane Hollander agenda so picture like, Ilya at a team member's bachelor party and the whole Raiders team is there and everyone is drunk and they're playing games and just yelling out answers at the same time to questions like what's your favourite position and age you lost your virginity and giving each other shit for the answers but then there's what player you would go gay for and suddenly the whole team yells Shane Hollander at once to stunned silence afterwards and Ilya has the worst fucking night of his life

[tinylilemrys]

When Shane joins the centaurs, Ilya arranges it that he gets the locker next to his. He's not passing up the chance to flirt with his half-dressed husband before and after games. Being captain comes with perks.

"You're lucky to get this locker," he tells Shane before their first practice. "Everyone in this room is always fighting to get it."

"Why, because it's the one next to yours?" says Shane, tugging a curl at the back of Ilya's head just hard enough to pull his head back playfully.

"Well, yes," laughs Ilya. "But this is also the magic locker."

Shane has that look on his face that Ilya knows means he's not sure if he wants to laugh or roll his eyes.

"The magic locker?" he says with a skeptical eyebrow and a fond smile. "I'm scared to ask what that means."

"You'll see. Is very mysterious. Science cannot explain it. You will soon see its power for yourself."

And Shane's laughing now.

"How about you get dressed so that you're not late for practice, Cap? The only power I want to see right now is your ass on the ice."

And Ilya has this stupid grin the whole way through practice that only gets wider when Shane gets back to his locker to find his favourite post-practice protein bar and an ice-cold can of ginger ale. There's a small post-it stuck to the protein bar that says "Welcome to the team, Hollander. Love, the magic locker elves. xx" It's unmistakably Ilya's handwriting.

"See?" says Ilya, delighted at how much Shane is smiling. "Mysterious."

"Super mysterious," he says, pressing a small kiss to Ilya's cheek. "Tell the elves I say thank you."

And every practice or game after that, there's always something small waiting in the locker for Shane. Because his locker is magic.

[gloryhollanovjah]

Man I know Shane ruined Ilya's sleepover plans but he really made up for it in spades. I'm sorry I couldn't spend the night; please come to my house for two weeks. You bought me ginger ale; let me buy you Cokes and Doritos and water shoes. You made me a tuna melt; let me make you more burgers than we can eat. You asked me questions I didn't know how to answer; let me make sure you know I'm going to be as honest as I can. I'm sorry I got scared and ran away when you asked for more; let me stay up all night planning the rest of our lives.

[thisfeebleheart]

the way Shane looks at Ilya in Tampa insp. by @immovabletype's tags:

[the-silliest-lad]

Charles Rowland

[the-silliest-lad]

Reblog with the more finished sketch