The No Bullshit Warlock

Secular witchcraft, served without the candy-coating. Curmudgeonly musings. Also, the odd cat. 

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Witch Tip

(also doubles as an autistic witch tip)

You can charge a spell- or just about anything, really- by playing a song. The more times you play it, the more energy you put into it. 

So if you feel like listening to the same song over.... and over... and over again... Well, this is your chance to use it well. 

[spellscript]

Intent and Tech Magic

Alright, I’m gonna ramble for a little bit about techno witchcraft again. Let’s talk about intent and programmed spells.

We say that a person can charge singular items, such as such as amulets, crystals, sigils, with intent. These things can be made of various materials, from paper to quartz, and they often have their own energies to contribute. Outside of the physical realm, one can charge words, dancing, art, song, and any number of representative actions with intent, and shielding can be seen as general energy being charged with a purpose.

Here’s my argument: computers are already by definition energetic systems. They’re complex machines run by electricity and logic. If one can call upon the wild energies of a thunderstorm, why couldn’t one harness the controlled energies of a computer or smart phone (and if you really get into it, you can literally control the controlled energies of machines)?*

Furthermore, specific to programming: by planning and creating a program, you are investing your own energy in it – you are investing a great deal of very focused energy into it, often for hours at a time.** Your intent is by nature crammed into that program already.

As for automation, long-lasting magic is something that exists already. If you weave a wreath that you hang over your door to protect your house from negative energy, how do you keep it there, a day, a week, a season? When was the last time you gave that old spell jar a shake? How long do your protective amulets last? What about that sigil you drew under your desk to reduce work anxiety? Often you can answer that with the question, how long did you mean for it to work?

Why can’t a spell you throw up in the cloud last for a while? If it didn’t, why couldn’t you check its magical pulse, so to speak, and charge it again? Or, why not make it a part of the spell to harness the energy generated by the server it’s on (remember, “The Cloud” is actually just tons of servers in a warehouse holding data)?

I’m still experimenting with all this myself (currently and always running tests on this to see what I can do), and these are just my thoughts based on my experience thus far. There’s certainly a lot more topics you can tackle branching from this: what implications do bugs and errors have on spells, which logical structures are best suited for which types of spells, is a spell best charged on completion or just before runtime***…the list goes on, all the more to explore!

–

* I’ve already said my piece on the natural vs unnatural argument. They’re not the same, of course, but they’re both certainly valid in their own applications.

** Granted, inevitable things like troubleshooting divert your attention for some amount of that time, so I generally charge it afterwards to pull the focus back together – kind of like centering, but for the spell itself.

*** I’ll go ahead and say just before runtime so you don’t send out your intent with buggy code and cause yourself trouble and frustration of either the magical or non-magical variety. Testing is your friend.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Quick way to gather up energy

I’m autistic, as I might have mentioned, and I use a spinner ring.

^ It looks something like this. The ring in the middle spins when you flick it, while the rest of the ring stays still.

I’ve enchanted this ring so that when I spin it, I can gather up energy with it. I tend to spin it clockwise, because that’s how it’s meant to be spun, but it’s definitely possible to spin it widdershins. When I spin it, it gathers up energy. I can channel this into my body, or vent it out somewhere else. 

So if you were already looking into getting one of these (for anxiety, stimming, or what have you), this is another use for it.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

woo for thee, belief for me

So here’s an idea: instead of calling stuff ‘woo’, can we talk about why we actually disagree with it/think it’s harmful crap?

People outside the witch community can sometimes think just about everything we do is woo. Atheists in particular are big on dismissing everything we do as ‘woo’ without explaining why they think it’s bad. This rightfully makes most people upset. Our beliefs are not ~woo~, we have reasons for believing them and most of the time they’re at least a coherent belief system. If people want to disagree with us, we’d like it if they actually disagreed with the substance of our ideas, instead of just writing us off.

So why don’t we extend the same courtesy to people within the community?

If you think crystal healing or the Secret or essential oil pyramid scams are harmful bullshit- don’t just write them off as ~woo~ that stupid people believe. This is counterproductive. Plenty of ‘smart’ people believe these ideas, and ignoring them is not going to stop people from spreading around harmful BS.

Talk about why pyramid scams are bad, no matter what they’re selling, and how the health benefits of essential oils are overexaggerated, and how you can make your own essential oil. 

Talk about why the Secret can often be used as victim-blame-y bullshit and how sitting on your butt is a bad way to get things you want to happen. 

Talk about why intent and believing in the ~natural power of your body~ isn’t always enough to make yourself better, and how, if you can afford decent medical care, you’re obligated to society to get it. (And, while you’re at it, talk about reforming the healthcare system so that poor people don’t have to rely on crystal healing and OTC meds to survive.)

I think substantive disagreement is usually a better idea than mockery, unless the idea itself is so evil that you can’t substantively disagree. Most bad ideas that witch-y type people spread around are not evil. They’re just bullshit. 

So let’s try to do more arguing and less mocking. The community can only get better for it.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

tarot tip

Sometimes, when going through a deck, you’ll find a card that’s Your Card. 

I only work with one deck right now- that being the Homestuck deck because I’m a filthy meme- and My Card is the Chariot.

Sometimes, when I’m doing a reading, I’ll flip through my deck and find the Chariot. I’ll look at the cards on either side. 

I use this as an informal ‘how am I doing’ reading. Sometimes it’s just good to know where you stand. 

[thepaganstudygrouppage]

Is there a reason for magic being spelled with a 'K' sometimes? I'm very curious why some people do this

Some people use it differentiate between the magic of actual witchcraft and other traditions and the magic of someone like a stage magician or con artist.  Others think it’s unnecessary.  Whether or not someone uses it is a personal choice.

- mountain hound

before asking | faq+tags | resource blog

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

fear is *not* the beginning of wisdom: taking your power back

This post is mostly aimed at witches who come from Christian backgrounds and are no longer Christian/Abrahamic. If you’re a Christo-witch, a tradwitch that works with the Devil, or a Luciferian witch, this post is probably not for you, and I’m not trying to shout at you or say you’re WRONG. There is no wrong way to magic, and it’s not wrong to be Christian.  Also, this is a slightly less secular post than usual; if you’re an atheist you might not agree with everything in here. That’s okay, but please be respectful.

Second caveat here is that I’m not a great spirit worker; most of the information about non-corporeal entities is from people who work with them more often than I do. If a better spirit worker wants to chime in, please do.  

If you come from a certain kind of Christian background, you might have some hangups about doing magic. You might have been told that magic is satanic, fed horror stories about exorcisms because dumb kids were playing with ouija boards, or even threatened with hell for being a witch.

Some of us struggle with fear because of this. It can be hard to get even basic magic started when you’re dealing with this crap, much less harder stuff that involves your full concentration. You might be worried that you’re a bad person, or that magic is only going to have bad results for you. You might still be afraid of the god you grew up with - the angry god who holds sinners in his hands. 

I had some of the same worries. I figured out how to get over them and take my power back. Find out how under the cut. 

First off, most of the time, entities only have the amount of power over you that you let them have. 

An entity can nag at you, bang at your defenses, try to mess up your life in a million ways, but if you’ve got shields up and ignore the entity, it will usually stop and leave you alone. Sometimes, you need to confront the entity, but even then, you can usually make things you don’t want buzz off. And from what I’ve seen, this holds true for gods as well as spirits or humans.

You don’t have to put up with shit, no matter who’s throwing it at you. If you had an abusive boss, you can find a way to leave your job; after that, you can find another job in the same field, or a different field, or become self-employed, or reject work altogether and found a commune where you live off organically-grown vegetables and yoga. 

Gods are the same way: you don’t have to stay with a god that’s abusing you. You can find a different version of big-G God, or worship different gods, or refuse to worship any gods, or become an agnostic or atheist, and all of these things are okay. 

You control your reality. You can walk away from a god and nothing will happen to you, because they no longer have any power over you.  Even if you’ve been worshiping a god your entire life. Even if you made oaths or covenants. (Why do you think I call myself a warlock?)

That’s the first part, and the hardest: cutting ties with an abusive god and recognizing that you’re safe. Build up your shields, learn to combat the nagging thoughts that you’re doing something wrong. Get therapy if you need it; there’s no shame in that either. 

Once you’ve gotten away from that immediate fear, it can help to think intellectually about why people spread the idea that you can never get away from a god around. Many of the people spreading them- your mum, your gran, your sainted aunt- really believe them, and only have your best interests at heart. 

The people who originate these stories, though, whether they’re doing it consciously or not, want you to be afraid. They want you to not leave their group, whether it’s the local Mormon church or a tiny neopagan circle. They want you to depend on them. These people are the kind of people who start cults. 

There’s a reason I attached the picture of Jareth to this post- people who want you to stay with them when you want to go- whether they’re abusers, cult leaders, or just shitty people- work on Goblin King Logic. Love them, they say, fear them, do everything they say, and you will have the world. 

But that’s not how the world works. You can’t get it from someone else. Happiness, satisfaction, achievement- those things come from inside you. People who tell you they can give you those things at the expense of what’s inside you are lying. 

The second part of taking your power back is recognizing that you’ve been lied to, and acting accordingly: ie, giving no fucks. 

Lastly -  At some point, if you want to use magic- call yourself a witch, a wizard, a mage, a shaman, a warlock, a magical girl, what have you- you have to jump into the metaphorical pool feet-first, hold your nose, and take the plunge. There’s no getting around it. If you’re afraid of something, sometimes you need to run away- but sometimes you need to confront it, and for me, this was one of those times. 

The third part of taking your power back is to use it. Do magic. See what happens. You’re not gonna get struck by lightning or have a chasm of hellfire open under your feet, I promise. (Unless you’re doing weather magic on a high hill during a thunderstorm, but that’s just poor judgment.)

You can do this. You can become the witch you want to be. You don’t have to be afraid anymore. The inside of your head is yours to control, and you can kick the fear out. 

You’re gonna be okay.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Spell: For a no-good, terrible, rotten, bad day

I had a day like this yesterday, and so I had to think of a way to magic myself out. This is what came out. 

Step One: Make a brownie-inna-mug, or some other food item that is comforting and safe for you. 

I suggest brownie-inna-mug for a couple reasons: It takes a few steps to make, but not so many you get overwhelmed if you’re low-spoons. Even if you fuck it up, it’s still pretty edible. And, of course, you can stick a candle in it.

Step Two: Get a birthday cake candle. Stick it in your food of choice.

Step Three: Recite an incantation of your choosing. Mine goes something like this:

“I am a good person. I deserve to be okay. Just because today sucks ass doesn’t negate that. I am powerful and kickass and can get through this.” 

Step Four: Blow out the candle. Eat the brownie. Hopefully, feel a little better.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Reblogging for the day crowd.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Spell: For a no-good, terrible, rotten, bad day

I had a day like this yesterday, and so I had to think of a way to magic myself out. This is what came out. 

Step One: Make a brownie-inna-mug, or some other food item that is comforting and safe for you. 

I suggest brownie-inna-mug for a couple reasons: It takes a few steps to make, but not so many you get overwhelmed if you’re low-spoons. Even if you fuck it up, it’s still pretty edible. And, of course, you can stick a candle in it.

Step Two: Get a birthday cake candle. Stick it in your food of choice.

Step Three: Recite an incantation of your choosing. Mine goes something like this:

“I am a good person. I deserve to be okay. Just because today sucks ass doesn’t negate that. I am powerful and kickass and can get through this.” 

Step Four: Blow out the candle. Eat the brownie. Hopefully, feel a little better.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

Thinking is difficult. That’s why most people judge.

C.J. Jung (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

It’s a kind of magic

I’m always surprised by witch-y type people who don’t like technology that much. If you define magic as ‘will projected onto the universe to Do Stuff’... aren’t most products of technology exactly that? 

A lot of people, at one point or another, sat down and said, ‘I think people should be able to fly’. Eventually, the Wright brothers figured it out. They wanted a thing. They worked to make a thing that would do the thing. They put their hopes, their dreams, and their ideas into fabric and wood and a motor, put it together, and tested it.

And it worked. 

Magic isn’t just crystals or herbs or cauldrons or tarot or visualization. Magic is seeing what you want to do, getting the universe in the right shape to do it, and then doing it- whether or not it’s using the methods from the shiny new age book or the ways of our ancestors. It doesn’t matter what it looks like; it matters that it gets the job done.

(I mean, hell, have you looked at a Business Leadership Book lately? It’s indistinguishable from a new age book, they just use different jargon.)

Arthur C. Clarke once said that any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. I’m gonna take that one step further. 

Any technology can be magic. Art can be magic. Cooking and handicrafts and industrial design and music and makeup and programming can all be magic. 

As long as you are creating a new reality for yourself, you’re using magic. 

[niaskotl]

Where can i learn more about chaos magic? Anything i should study? Ive read the Kybalion which really resonated with me; so i have the key i need to open any door. This by law wasnt chance. Chaos to me is just order undefined. Im not sure what r T?

There are lots of places to start with chaos magick… I like the psychonaut field manual quite a bit as a starting point. I would also suggest the writings of Peter Carroll such as Liber Null and Psychonaut. Finally I’d recommend checking out the work of Genesis Breyer P-Orridge, Thee Psychick Bible for instance.

Now… I’ve started reading the Kybalion and it strikes me that there is a basic difference between what you’ll find there and what you find in chaos magick. The Kybalion seems to claim basically all knowledge of the occult stems back to one teacher, Hermes Trismegistus. So the study of the occult is a process of teaching of some divine knowledge down through the generations from teacher to student.

Chaos magick generally starts with a rejection of the sort of authority that the Kybalion venerates. According to chaos magick philosophy, any system can work if the student can believe it will work. There is no absolute truth to be handed down. Inventiveness and creativity are more highly regarded than tradition.

If the Kybalion provides the key to open any door, chaos magick teaches that you can swing it such that there was no door in the first place.

[wolfteacreations]

[littlefangtarot]

Spread inspired by Undertale by Toby Fox, created by Obsydian of Little Fang Tarot.

Purchase a reading using this spread at www.littlefangtarot.com For private use only.

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

...I probably shouldn’t be surprised that the (super short!) post containing a spell got more notes than all of my longform rambling put together, should I. 

So I’m opening it to the floor: what would you guys like to see more of? Is it just that my longposts are too long? 

[nobullshitwarlock-blog]

Spell for Focus

(Because that’s all I’ve got the spoons and time to post today.) 

All you need for this is a candle and something to light it with; maybe somewhere to hold it if it’s a taper.

Light the candle, and repeat some variation of this under your breath:

“I am focused. As long as this candle burns, I will not be distracted by irrelevant crap.”

(if you prefer rhyme, make a little jingle for yourself, if you prefer fancier language, pretty it up a bit. Me, I like ritual as much as the next guy, but I’m pretty plain-spoken.)

Put the candle somewhere safe, but where you can see it. Every time you feel yourself getting distracted by irrelevant crap, look over at the candle. Then, try to go back to whatever it is you were supposed to be focused on. 

[warlocksway]

Warlock Tip

Group dynamics lesson for the day - when facing an accusation, a person with nothing to hide will discuss the event. A person with a guilty conscience will attack the accuser or the accusation.