asshole extraordinaire @nolehcra - Tumblr Blog

what’s the most disturbing HP fanfiction you’ve ever read?

The cursed child

oh, to be a cartoon mafia boss with two dimwitted but loveable lackeys who, upon my cleverly insulting the protagonist, will say “nice one, boss,” and the second, in a slightly higher, more snivelly voice, will say “haha, yeeah, nice one boss!”

plantinghuman

Funny way to find out which plant you might like to buy.

Source: apartmenttherapy.com

herbwicc

FOR MY FOLLOWERS THAT HAVE DIFFICULTY CARING FOR PLANTS AND ASK WHAT THEY SHOULD BUY, THIS IS REALLY GREAT!!

eternal-abode

lumixercalderic-deactivated2016

spider-hands-mannos-deactivated

Apparently Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth just got hitched, and congratulations to them. But this is the first time I've seen Cyrus in a while and I'm shocked she looks human again. Whatever the hell she was doing these last few years is gone and she looks a lot more like she did when she was younger, but healthier. Good for her.

The demon jumped ship into Katy Perry.

Let me demonstrate

Era One: Miley is not possesed

Era Two: Miley is possessed by the Unknown Demon

Contact: Miley comes into close contact with Katy Perry

Transfer: Uknown Demon makes leap into Perry

Recovery: Miley recovers from possession

First Murder: Katy Perry, Possessed, proceeds to kill a Nun via stress in a legal battle over the purchase of a convent

This concludes my lecture on the rampant demon problem in Pop Music circles.

princessofbadvibes

This is…quite convincing…

gothhabiba

a woman: hi, how are you?

a man: hm. see I wouldn’t have phrased it exactly like that. I might have said “hello” or perhaps “salutations.” but the way you said it is cute though.

waluigi-whitman-deactivated2017

You are aware this is just as sexist as the things people say about women, correct?

inkskinned

a woman: you ever notice men speak to women like we are beneath them and constantly police our language and appearance?

a man: hm. i know you, poor thing, are blissfully unaware of the difficulty that text posts put us (men, or “males,” depending on the colloquial) through. let me explain in the follow paragraph how we can effectively ignore institutionalized and global sexism because this post personally called me, a man, out for my degrading behavior. see, this sort of witty and harmless observation is sexist,

snakebitcat

I’ll take “Things the women who abused me could have posted”, Alex.

gothhabiba

sgaggaghayahfafafafsfagaaasddgsh???

kawacy

She waited and listened.

addictedtothe-thrill

Flip your phone upside down

starwarsgraphictee

worth it

trestyoselfchris-deactivated201

I’m high rn and I just experienced pure joy

futubandera-cl

oddishtea

I’ve watched this like 30 times and I cant stop laughing aksjska

surprisebitch

the girl has big dick energy

sl33pyd3mon

she stole all of his dick energy and killed him

matydn

I’m the girl making sure everyone knows he lost

drishananicole

Homegirl did a whole dance right after.😂😂😭

alexander

if this isn’t me i swear

vividspark

ig:seohyeony_

captainlordauditor

some iconic dialogue that sounds like its from the great canon of literature but are actually from memes

I will face God and walk backwards into Hell

“I’ll do whatever you want” “then perish”

I have been through hell and come out singing

feel free to add more!

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

There are no gods here

Do I look like the kind of man who dies

God’s dead and soon we will be too

I thought there were no heroes left in this world

helloitstrash

• you kneel before my throne unaware that it was built on lies

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

Impudent of you to assume I will meet a mortal end

This is hell’s territory and I am beholden to no gods

Bury me shallow, I’ll be back

hubriscomplex

- take this gift, for the gods surely won’t

unheavenlycreatures

God wishes he were me

One day, you will be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe, and you will have to justify the space you’ve filled

tyrannosaurus-rex

Violence for Violence is the Rule of Beasts

spacehunter-m

Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! but it’s sung by the DK Rap

gamerphobic-deactivated20200727

this is next level

brangdangowitz-deactivated20201

did you go into this thinking “i’m gonna make this like this” or like were you listening to the DK rap and thought “i can make the scooby-dop thene out of this” or like vice-versa i need to know the thought process.

spacehunter-m