Slave to One

[not--waving--drowning]

bite it back

and the words aren't easy they get stuck in my throat like briars or stickers that cling to your pants leg

anything beyond i miss you feels like commitment like a trap where forever is the key to a door eternally locked

loose lips sink ships but i know how to swing watching the water slowly rise and calculating how long my air will last

keeping quiet a lesson on the history of my life biting back the words until my mouth fills with blood

i hear the words echo in my mind gaining momentum like a train hurtling down the tracks toward what may be calamity

i clear my throat and swallow choking back the words but not the feelings i'll keep them both for another day and secretly hope that you know how i truly feel

[not--waving--drowning]

knives

and i have a fondness for sharp things broken glass, broken trust, shiny blades they have found me over and over under my feet, hitting my heart, piercing my back

i keep it all inside, bottled up, contained waiting for the pain to show itself trust isn't something i'm cognizant of the pieces of past destruction linger

blood let by so many so many stained hands left behind and still my heart beats although differently still i struggle to see the silver lining

you make me forget in moments moments that stretch to minutes and then longer periods where i find myself smiling and looking at clouds

i said i'd never let anyone close again i'd never say those words i'd never trust again i swore and yet here you are, and I love you.

[not--waving--drowning]

and it hurts watching you struggle we try to get it right but cannot align the stars to be in our favor

and no matter how hard we try it's never fixed just patched, waiting for someone to rip it off

and they will do that they have shown their true colors a leopard doesn't change its spots and liars know the lies they've told yet continue to spew them like truths

if it doesn't fit their narrative or it benefits you, it is muted and still we try, we fight breathe as deeply as possible and hope that someday the air

will finally smell like freedom.

[not--waving--drowning]

and there is a language. to being wanted. that i don't speak

a rhythm that I cannot. dance to with these. two left feet

a flow and edge. an invisible thread. but no one knotted the end.

desire like a needle. run through flesh. I'd bleed for you if you'd notice

but before I can learn. to say hello. goodbye has already been said

[crmsnmth]

Dad

The house is quieter now Not silent, but changed As though the walls learned To breathe more softly After you left

Your boots still remember The very shape of your steps Their leather leans inward As if listening For the weight they once carried

I speak to you In the small hours When the world folds itself Into the size of memory I tell you things I never said aloud That your laughter was a lighthouse And your anger too Was only another form Of love trying to find its way out

Grief sits beside me Like an old friend Who takes up too much space But refuses to leave Some days we argue Some days we share tea And on the worst days We simply breathe In the same fragile rhythm

But I have learned That death is not the opposite of living Only the opposite of staying And though you are gone From the rooms you once warmed You remain In the way I tie my shoes In the way I face the wind In the way I rise After every hard fall

I carry you Not as a wound But as a compass And somewhere Beyond the reach of clocks I hope you know That nothing you taught me Has forgotten how to shine

[purplemonkeysexgod69]

[not--waving--drowning]

[not--waving--drowning]

and you know I didn't forget

Just saved my sorrow for the dark

There is only so much pain

One can carry in their heart

I shared mine with the moon

And he seemed to understand

He tried to share my sorrow

But like most he didn't understand

Then I whispered to the darkness lease take this pain away

The answer was just silence

And the pain didn't go away

Some say time heals all wounds

Most know that is a lie

Told by those who haven't felt this grief

I cant find words to explain why

But this I know through all these years

My sorrow has not lifted

But I've always been thankful

For the time that we were gifted

So to those who do not understand

You live inside my heart

Your pacing is its beating

And that is why we will never part.

RIP DMP

ATTENTION

If you see this you are OBLIGATED to reblog w/ the song currently stuck in your head :)

[s0lace-1n-s0l1tude]

DARE by Gorillaz

@suicideenthusiast @zestylemonsz @bananaede @swimminginyokohamasrivers @bananaede @cherubsaliaa @windyskiez @sky-the-weirdo-ace @p1xel-1mp @kaiserkisser @jordan-mother-fucking-tuck @dietc0kevanilla @xt0t4llys4n300x @sparky4577

[onyx44413]

Partners in crime by Set It Off!!!!

@jamespotterandcharliespringkin @lucasthedoofus-iamgod @s1l4s-1ng3sts-t0m4t03s @apostolicalcoholicc

@sun13koi @star-dust-shark @justagremlinoncaffeine @four-leafed-queer-gal @someone-kill-the-ej

[flaming-cactus]

Wasn’t tagged but idc

@thecrazyalchemist @violet-hady @the-stars-ar3-with-us @annotated-catastrophe

[a-fishy-fish]

Thanks for the tag!!

Over the creek by George Ezra

npt: @noob-master69 @sketchy-potato @sleepyy-27 @doodlebugdrawz 

@amayis-bigtower @i-eat-so-much-grass @four-leafed-queer-gal @brobiwan-kenobi-412 @w-h06 

@poems-of-the-anentomologist and anyone who wants to join!!

[sketchy-potato]

Thanks for the tag :]

Whenever I get something talking about a song, I’m always gonna say Never Gonna Give you Up, cause that’s just what my brain goes to 😭

Never Gonna Give you Up by Rick Astley

Ummm, @urlocaldisaster and anyone else (I don’t want to have to think rn)

[crixaflamma-the-second-deactiva]

thank you for the tag! :D

never gonna give you up being stuck in your head is so real

but for me its gotta be…

Bones by Imagine Dragons

npt - @123letsgobestie @glassesgirlies @woooaaah-buddy @justalunaticfangirl @rosy-cozy-radio

[glassesghosties]

ty for the tag :)

don’t rly have anything stuck in my head, probs cause im currently listening to music.

story - against the machine by noga erez

umm no pressure tagsss

@lusxnei6 @atac-agent @marielaure

[lusxnei6]

Someone To You by BANNERS

Npts: @lizzzzzzzzzzzzzz—lol @legobouquet @jkriordanverse @maidenofcrows @the-7-thcrow

[shimmerytimbers]

@clarissaweasley-10 @isthataraccoon @randomfandom-3 @reyreadersblog @lost-my-head-in-the-clouds

@s-rosie @mrs-jameson-hawthorne @pockyyasii @mt-jupiter @inmyheaddd

@finnslay @his-littlefox @x-liv25-jamieswife @lyrakanefanatic @f4iry-bell

@never-enough-novels @myfairkatiecat @wraith–2 @aliciaverse @phuongwn2711

@harukanaaaa @starrynightsxo @mariamluv @kit4strophe @mariamluv

[feellikeasadsong]

THANK YOUUUU FOR TAGGING ME….(to everyone who tagged me cz i remember being tagged in this before)

for me the song is

TAGGING @catapparently @tunguszka20 @shattermelyhfmlblog @mujhekyamaitosojaaungi @rizzgoddessans

[rizzgoddessans-deactivated20251]

thanks for the tag, Aarohi<3

It’s exam season so I have one song stuck in my mind

@hisreveriee @tiredpapergirl @his-littlefox @sitting-in-a-library @bingazer @highladyofterrasen7 @thegangbcsiamtoolazytotag @anyoneelsewhowantstojoinbecauseiamtoolazytotag

[tiredpapergirl]

Head empty.

@illarian-rambling @informedimagining @naharie @thecomfywriter

@meangirlsbway @beabeebeee @cptnbandana @everfall24

@foyle-writes-things @gallowayisacow @his-littlefox @i-am-phroggie

@thehighladyreads @wastehound-voof @yakultstan

[yakoncewas]

@thepaladinstrait @hersurvival @jason-hates-grass @cantexistloudenoughforyou @canibereborn @luvnotpercival @evaaraaa @fall-asleep-7 @miniaturereblogbottles

[http-terr0r]

i meant to do this so much sooner but

@ivaspinoza @lar0sita @faunem @postictarus (if u want ofc)

[stolenhead]

Thanks for the mention. Took my elderly ass a hundred years to figure out what to do. :b

@merakiione @mrpicasso-face @offstage-euthymia @lead-to-code (no pressure)

[not--waving--drowning]

[not--waving--drowning]

with me

the devil rolled the dice and then asked me to play i've never fallen with grace the ground rushes to meet my bruising face

this was no exception falling hard and fast being the rule i'm sure i'm not the prize he imagined i can almost imagine his bestial roar

when he stops dancing suddenly perhaps thinking that i had changed of course that's what he was expecting but to me, like him, this is just a game

you see ours was not a binding transaction it was not legal in any sense and if i break it what court would hear it twas all in fun, it was just a jest

and then he stops and slowly turns seeing that he has been bested keep the things i've given he whispers in your future i'm now invested

i see him now, always on the periphery he doesn't approach and no one else sees but i know that I'm never alone it's always us two the devil and me.

[not--waving--drowning]

speeches

and i'm searching for that place where all of time stands still there i'll gaze upon your face i'll stare until i get my fill

that moment will be frozen forever etched in stone finally beholding the place that i call home

I'll want to stay there with you but we both know i can't i know that this is true but the reasons do seem scant

let me say in that moment so clearly you will understand let my words be truly potent this little speech was never planned

please know that in all time and space across this whole life and the next it is you that i cannot replace and my soul will never truly rest

until you believe my love is true and that i'll stay with you forever my heart is loyal to only you and my promise is to leave you never.

[not--waving--drowning]

sign posts

you called me a beautiful disaster but you knew i was a demon in disguise you reveled with me in my depravity but never understood my sighs

you need to realize that when i sigh it's sometimes because i forgot to breathe it's not always a commentary on a situation that you perceive

in my little band of outcasts love is generally shown and rarely said but you have to know i love you i hope the signs I've posted you've read

i try to show you in so many ways the love for you that fills my heart that i would follow you absolutely anywhere surely you and I will never part.

but in case you need for me to say it i'll do my best to make you hear you need to know I truly love you i love you my darling I hope that's clear.

[not--waving--drowning]

the path

and i heard a story about 12 feet

that a captive bear would walk

12 steps forward the 12 steps back

was all of the room that he'd got

in his sleep he saw wide vistas

and rivers and trails and streams

wide open spaces and freedom

haunted all of his dreams

people came from far and wide

to try to draw his wrath

but still that bear continued

to walk his well worn path

till one day he got a new owner

who felt he had done his time

and found a place where he could free him

it was all the bear had in his mind

and when his captors had left him

he could roam in the world of his dreams

the bear was overwhelmed by his choices

still stuck in that 12 feet scheme

i see you pacing your boundaries

ones that you never even set

arbitrarily delineated by someone else

you are held captive and yet

you also dream of wide open spaces

of concepts you thought were long lost

i could restore your faith if you'd let me

share with you all that i've got

but you'd have to open more than your eyes

it's your heart you have to set free

i can offer you all of life's freedoms

just take my hand and come with me

i wont even ask you to love me

i've enough of that for the both of us

i'm offering all that you have wanted

you only have to dare to trust

i promise to show you the truth

when i say forever that's what i mean

i dare you to take my outstretched hand

let's walk together into our dreams.

[not--waving--drowning]

catharsis

and I will give you everything that has consumed me the passions and the past that have controlled me the wants and desires that have compelled me and the lines drawn in the sand that have corralled me

will you accept all the emotions that have choked me the rules and regulations that have curbed me the griefs and all the losses that have contained me

your loyalty and dedication shown have calmed me the encouragement and support you give has charmed me the desire and the craving for me has conquered me the love and care you've given me has changed me.

[not--waving--drowning]

if my love

and if my love were the ocean would you borrow a boat or throw on a life jacket and see how far you can float

would you dare the large waves and the creatures within would you say a true prayer and then confess all your sins

if my love were the world would you roam the far lands would you dig in my dirt and drag your feet in the sands

would you trek through the jungles a tiger to find would you stare up at the canopy and let my love blow your mind

if my love were the sky would you fly into space fueled by emotion at a gargantuan pace

would you fly past the moon and wave at the sun would you smile in the stratosphere at the heart that you've won

and if my love were infinite would you accept it on faith would you hold my heart gently and adjust to its pace

would you welcome my promise and know that it's true i will love you forever it is all i can do.

[not--waving--drowning]

dark love

and you've heard all the frilly ways

that love can be declared

the soft emotional cries of love

that in the sunlight blazed

i refuse to talk that way

that 's not my kind of love

it's not the one that's heaven sent

didn't come down from above

my love is dark and hard it's tough

like flames reaching up from hell

ask me what i know of fire

i've learned those lessons well

i don't want your sunny days

it's the thunder and lightening i'm after

the waves that threaten to capsize the boat

not the dove my dear but the raptor

my love has fangs and claws

it doesn't whisper it growls and snarls

it tears and rips into your heart

it's guaranteed to give you scars

but in place of all the flowery thoughts

in my love there is a stark truth

i won't speak of loyalty and honor

our lives together will be the proof

you can yell and i can scream

we can fight if the words won't come

but at the end of all the strife

we both will be at home

i don't want to watch the world burn

or maybe, secretly, it's a dream

if you and I can dance together

just outside the flames

so while the declarations you've heard

may be fundamentally true

i'd rather share this dark love and ensure

you'll know it will see you through

so please don't hold the words unsaid

against me because i don't say them

see the way i love and protect, if

anyone hurts you i will slay them

you are my world, it's you and me

hurtling forward in the dark

because despite what poets say

love is never just a walk in the park.

[not--waving--drowning]

horses

and if hope was a horse i could ride on suddenly he's come up lame

joined the others in the paddock after all they are the same

there's hope and trust happiness and truth also set my heart aflame

all of them running in circles and i'll never ride again

there's comfort and joy delight and elation do their names all sound the same

watch and you'll see treasured and respected and adored in all his acclaim

and to think that i'll never ride any of them again is sad and fills me with a certain shame

you see i'm getting off this crazy merry-go -round and i don't plan to ride again

i've given up on horses and love and it's you that i should blame

for the horse, you went and sold me was love and now he's gone down in flames.