Incorrect Team MEAN Quotes

An assassin's son, a wandering thief, a exiled beast, and a mute con artist. Together they are Team MEAN.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Can I write fanfiction based off of Team MEAN, please?

Of course you can! But for future reference, you don’t need to ask me if you want to write a fanfic based on this concept!

But now that you’re considering writing something about these guys I’m looking forward to it.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Mercury and Adam are waiting for Emerald and Neo to arrive. It was quiet until...

Adam unzips one of the zippers on his attire, reaches into the pocket, and takes out a plastic bag full of trail mix.

Mercury: What the?! You keep SNACKS in there?

Adam: Yes, and?

Mercury: Well... you know what they say, you learn something new....

[not-your-sacrifice]

Adam: You make me so angry so quickly. It's remarkable.

Blake: I literally only said 6 words.

Adam: Yet here I am, boiling with hate.

[not-your-sacrifice]

I’m not interested in being polite or heterosexual.

Neo Politan, probably

[not-your-sacrifice]

When have any of our plans ever actually worked? We plan, we get there, all hell breaks loose!

Emerald, probably.

[not-your-sacrifice]

*Emerald returns after completing the training exercise Adam gave her... Escort a living and breathing Tiger in a car around*

Emerald: A fucking tiger?!

Adam: If you're fighting Cinder, you need to be ready for anything.

Emerald, getting more frustrated: A FUCKING TIGER?!

Adam, deadpan: Don't lost the message in the method. You mastered your fear.

Emerald, stunned that he was right, but couldn't let it go: ....What the fuck is wrong with you?!

[not-your-sacrifice]

*Emerald sees a stranger doing something stupid*

Emerald: What an idiot.

Emerald: *Realizes it’s Mercury*

Emerald: Wait that’s MY idiot!

[not-your-sacrifice]

Emerald: Whose turn is it to give a pep talk?

Neo, holds up a sign: 'It’s Adam’s turn'.

Adam: Fuck shit up out there but don’t die.

Mercury, wiping away a tear: Inspirational.

[razorblade180]

Ruby:We must always stay vigilant. Our enemies can be preparing to kill us all right now!

xxxx

Mercury:Blood rushes to your head when you’re upside so why doesn’t it rush to your feet when standing upright?

Adam:I refuse to believe you’re real sometimes.

Emerald:I refuse to believe he’s real all the time.

Neo:*searching for the answer online*

xxxx

Ruby:Evil never rests....

[not-your-sacrifice]

Adam: Come on, let's continue the mission.

Emerald: Alright! How do you think Cinder takes her coffee?

Ruby: Wait... you guys are hunting down Cinder?

Adam: Cinder? Who's Cinder-- SCATTER!!

*Team MEAN start to scatter and run off*

Yang, annoyed: How are those guys always one step ahead of us?

Adam, from afar: Wrong way, Emerald!

Emerald: Went the wrong way!

[not-your-sacrifice]

Emerald: Do you think all my wanted posters are for petty theft?

Emerald: [several stolen items fall from her clothing]

Emerald:

Emerald: Well, that’s part of it…

[not-your-sacrifice]

Mercury: It’s Saturday, the day of rest.

Emerald: Sunday is the day of rest.

Mercury: No, Saturday is the day of pre-rest.

Emerald: Pre-rest?

Mercury: Yeah, so that way when you actually get to Sunday you’re rested enough to enjoy your rest.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Adam: Have to stop saying, "How am I going to kill my way out of this one?" every time there is trouble going on.

Adam: At least not out loud.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Neo, holds up whiteboard: 'Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?'

Emerald: I'm afraid to ask, but go on.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Mercury: I was thinking this yesterday too, but you're really creepy when you worry about others.

Adam: Well excuse me, I'll just let you die next time!

[not-your-sacrifice]

Mercury: My criminal record? The only illegal thing I've done is absolutely killing it on the dance floor!

Mercury: Ha! Just kidding, I've killed men.

[not-your-sacrifice]

Adam: House arrest is so funny to me. You committed crimes, stay home.

Neo, signs: 'Advanced grounding.'