Zylith

Purple House System | body is 21 | white | chronically ill | transmasculine

[nothingseriousjustbored]

Hi

We are the Purple House System, you can call us Purple. We label us as genderfluid and aceflux. Our body is 21, white, transmasculine, chronically ill and we have autism.

We are from Germany, so english isn't our first language and sadly we still live with our mother.

We are not comfortable to disclose who is fronting (most of the time we can't tell anyway) or our names and stuff.

I don't know what else to say, maybe we will add something later.

[debarked]

trauma so bad my coping mechanisms have names and pronouns

[miinobobeano]

It bothers me so much that the healthcare system relies so much on the patient's ability to advocate for themselves, organize their history, and be so persistent against every medical “professional” who says there’s nothing wrong/they can do. But so many struggle with fatigue, brain fog, and face such ingrained systemic barriers, that the people who need and deserve help and support can’t access it.

I saw something recently that resonated with me: “Access shouldn't depend on who has the energy to fight for it.” And I’ve never agreed with anything more.

[minimallycreative]

me: *hasnt had water or salt all day, running on maybe 4 hours of sleep*

me: why do i feel like shit

[adhd-alien]

Why is there such a big gap between wanting to and actually doing something? Explained with SQUIRRELS!

[adhd-alien]

Remember when I came up with "buttons" to explain executive dysfunction just because I had an argument with my partner about getting things done?

I made an entirely new series for ADHD Awareness Month explaining motivation & ADHD. Coming next week 👀✨

[cowsabungus]

Frames for a wheelchair push cycle if it's a helpful reference for anyone

(Please note, a wheelchair push cycle is trickier to have as a single cycle, compared to a walk cycle, as there are at least 4 ways I know of for the propel segment, that being different ways to contact-release when pushing. Also, there's different levels of core strength, some people may not move their torso forward at all when propelling, some have stronger pushes so speed is different dependent on the power in their push, many people have one stronger arm that may take up more of the load, some people start further back or forward on the wheel in the beginning of the cycle, there is so much to consider but this is at lease A roll cycle. I deadass couldn't find any anywhere)

[oursystemblog]

Genuinely curious are there any foods that any of you vehemently disagree on re: if they’re good or bad, and if so has it led to any Unfortunate Situations

caretaker likes peanut butter host Does Not it's VERY funny

[hazedxg0]

Reminder that while severity of trauma is subjective, you still need severe trauma in order to develop DID. Your brain is not going to employ the most complex trauma response it has unless it has exhausted all other options, and it will only reach that point in response to severe trauma. Even if your definition of "severe" is different to other's, you still need to reach your brain's own standard for "severe".

[fairycosmos]

i really wish we could all just stop this weird facade that mental health is taken seriously just because there might be more conversation about depression than there was 20 years ago. as soon as you’re unable to work or maintain relationships or mask effectively enough you might as well be a joke. even to people who say they understand it

[hazedxg0]

Been seeing too many pop-psychology attachment theory posts that demonize avoidant attachment lately, so for the record:

You are not entitled to anyone else's time or affection.

People are allowed to leave you if they do not want a relationship with you.

People do not have to give you a reason that you approve of, or even a reason at all, to leave you if they do not want a relationship with you.

Your own co-dependency issues and attachment to someone else does not trump that person's ability to deny consent.

No-one is obligated to give you attention just because you want them to.

No-one is obligated to stay in a relationship they don't want to be in, even if the other person hasn't done anything wrong.

No-one is obligated to stay in a relationship they don't want to be in, even if the other person is mentally ill.

Attempting to force someone to stay through coercion, guilt tripping, or threats of suicide/self-harm is abusive.

[hazedxg0]

I think the current discourse around "saying alters are parts and not separate people is offensive!" is very similar to the "calling it a 'personality disorder' is offensive!" discourse, as they both can be explained by the fact that people moralize the idea of "personhood" or "personality" way too much.

They think we should lie about the reality of these conditions instead of changing the belief that having identity or personality problems means you don't deserve respect. Because they are so overly attached to the idea that "personality = morality" and therefore "personality problem = bad person" or "unintegrated personality = not a person".

it is literally not possible to be more than one person, having DID means that the parts that make up your personality couldn't integrate properly due to trauma and became extremely dissociated from each other. Even people without DID are made up of parts. If you think saying alters are parts means that people with DID aren't human, then I guess people without DID aren't either.

With the other discourse, people with PDs do genuinely have a disordered personality. The term "personality" in psychology refers to a person's long-term pattern of thought, emotion and behaviour. It refers to both their internal experience and the way they navigate interpersonal relationships and other external situations. Which is exactly what is disordered in people with PDs.

Acknowledging that alters are not entirely separate people and that people with PDs have disordered personalities isn't a bad thing. It doesn't mean these people aren't human or don't deserve respect or autonomy. It doesn't make you bad or less worthy. Because having a normal "personhood" isn't the thing that makes you worthy of human decency.

Because again, objectively speaking, these things are factually true. If society doesn't dismantle the belief that having problems with your identity or personality makes you deserving of demonization, then people with DID and PDs will continue to be demonized. It doesn't matter what flowery language you choose to dress it up in, people with DID do not function as a whole integrated person and people with PDs do not have a healthy personality. Whether or not they are deserving of human decency shouldn't depend on whether you can erase their conditions so that they align with the mentally healthy majority.

On a bigger scale, if finding out that there's something "wrong" or "different" with someone's personhood is all it takes for you to believe that they doesn't deserve respect, autonomy or individuality, then it will be extremely easy for you to be brainwashed into bigotry. Because all it takes is for a group to be even slightly dehumanized in your mind, and boom, they're not people to you anymore. And what do you know, that's an incredibly common tactic of extremists and bigots.

It should not matter if something has gone "wrong" with someone's identity or personality, everyone deserves respect and autonomy just for being alive. Whole integrated person or no, healthy personality or no, it doesn't matter. Erasing the true struggles of people with DID and PDs won't stop their oppression. Actually dismantling societal ableism will.

[hazedxg0]

I think one of the reasons why schizoid personality disorder has such a poor prognosis even when we do get treatment is because therapy is really hard when your brain is hardwired towards isolation and not letting people in.

For schizoids (especially those for whom trauma was a factor in developing SzPD), having even small amounts of emotional intimacy in a regular friendship or acquaintanceship can feel extremely overwhelming and unsafe. Another person finding things out about you can make all future interactions with them feel suffocating.

With how most people struggle with opening up in therapy, combined with how difficult any kind of openness can be for schizoids, you can probably see why this would be an issue for us. But one thing I think many MH professionals I've seen haven't understood is that sharing literally anything, even things that seem "small", can be very difficult for schizoids. It's not just the big vulnerable things, it's anything that's perceived as "personal".

Sure, I have trouble sharing the deep rooted personal issues that are at the heart of all my problems. But I also have trouble sharing relatively simple things, and it can cause major problems in therapy.

For example: the first time I did EMDR, I could not for the life of me give my therapist an answer when she asked what "safe space" or "safe image" I had picked to think about after the processing, or during if I got triggered too badly.

She assumed that I just couldn't think of anything (and I guess that was partially true because there isn't really anything that makes me feel a strong sense of comfort, since I don't really have that kind of emotional range), but no, I just couldn't voice anything I was thinking of because just telling another person about the kind of imagery I find calming was too much.

She ended up picking something for me I didn't even really find calming, so you can imagine how well that session went. But I can't even fully blame her, because she had no idea what the actual reason for why I wasn't telling her anything was.

But in so many other contexts as well, I've had therapists do that thing where they try to tell you their analysis of you and they've just been completely fucking wrong. And it's not necessarily because they're bad at their jobs, it's just because I didn't tell them anything, and I've mastered the art of saying just enough that the other person is satisfied without giving anything away.

It makes the whole process very frustrating, because on one hand I know I have significant mental health issues that are making my life miserable, but at the same time I am viscerally uncomfortable with someone else knowing what goes on in my head.

Just another reason why psychology courses basically ignoring "rarer" conditions (that aren't even that rare to begin with) is unacceptable. These things would be much easier to navigate if the professionals I see knew what my diagnosis actually meant.

[hazedxg0]

It's been said before but the online DID community really needs a crash course on internet safety. I understand documenting things about your system can be helpful, but for the love of god you should not be publicly posting intimate details about your system structure, splitting pattern or specific alters' triggers. Especially if you are a minor. Especially if you have a history of traumatic conditioning or coercive persuasion.

[hazedxg0]

It's funny when DID denialists pull the "well if it develops in childhood, why don't more children get diagnosed with DID?" thing. Because if you think about it for literally two seconds you'll come up with plenty of reasons.

In like 95% of cases, DID forms from abuse in the household. Parents who are abusing their child (or are complacent in the abuse of their child) are not going to take their kid to a therapist for the trauma they caused them.

Dissociation solidifies and alters develop complexity over time. Adolescents are known to have a more fluid and subtle presentation of DID, and that's the case even more so for children because their disorder has only just formed or is still forming.

The whole point of DID is to be covert, especially when you are still experiencing trauma (as is almost always the case with children with DID)

Children have been known to perceive their alters as imaginary friends or personified mood states. How often do you suspect a serious mental disorder when a child has imaginary friends or emotions?

Children in general have trouble properly reporting their symptoms, which is a known challenge in pediatric psychiatry.

Professionals don't really tend to diagnose anything beyond autism, ADHD, learning disorders, depression and anxiety in children below a certain age.

It takes adults around seven years of psychiatric treatment to be diagnosed with DID. In what world would it be faster for children?

The legal and psychiatric systems constantly fail the traumatized children they are supposed to protect. Why would this area be any different?

[this-is-ableism]

After 7 years of dating, I made a mistake and confided in my girlfriend that I have ASPD. The fact that I acquired it via unrelenting abuse as a result of being a victim of human trafficking did not save me. She dumped me. She's posted a bunch of stuff about how to spot a "sociopath" (a diagnosis that doesn't exist anymore) on social media.

this is ableism.

[theconcealedweapon]

I saw a video of a 13 year old girl damaging her parents' truck with a pickaxe, supposedly because they took her phone away. The comments were full of "this is what gentle parenting leads to".

Why does everyone think children like that received "gentle parenting"? Children don't learn violence and rage out of nowhere. And I highly doubt it was only in response to her phone being taken away. When children are abused constantly and reminded that everyone sides with their abusers and they have zero proper channels for holding their abusers accountable, they have to pick something to do about it. They're going to get a beating anyway just for using the wrong tone, so they might as well do something to deserve it.

Also, remember when that piece of shit Tommy Jordan shot his daughter's laptop with a gun because he was angry about a Facebook post she made? He was met with praise. Everyone wonders where children learn their violent outbursts from, while adults are praised for theirs.

Maybe if children were treated like people, this wouldn't happen.