trying on a metaphor
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if i look back, i am lost
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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@nuke-k
Recently got this absolutely wonderful GoodCollins commission from Emily/@kasphacked over on twitter, and wanted to share it with the small group that still sails this ship.
I figure these two goobers go to the local aquarium So Much, that they have a few creatures there that they have named and visit each time they go. This one? Seally Dan.
On a wave of Terror camp (oh my god, it's so awesome ❤️) I'm suddenly having a lot of Goodsir-related feelings, and I remembered this painting I did several years ago. And now I can take a better photo of it
MERRY CRISIS EVERYONE
what a way to kick my art block lmao
when ur chugging wine of coca and he gives u this look
Still thinking about Collins and his relationship with identity and responsibility.
Like, it's so SO important to him right from the start.
That's not just any faceless seamen down in the water.
BILLY ORREN. THAT'S WHO IT IS.
A real human being. That's who it is.
A real human being whose safety I was responsible for and who I have now, through no fault of my own, failed in my duty towards. THAT'S WHO IT IS.
I think it comes out later in his conversation with Goodsir a bit too.
My nose and my stomach, they don't know horrible from supper... BUT I DO. I DO!
I'm still a real human being. That's who I am.
A real human being who knows right from wrong and is trying so very hard to do the former. That's who I am.
A real human being who is not only clinging white-knuckled to his sanity but to his humanity too. THAT'S WHO I AM.
from a DM request: Frankencollins!! Look inspired by De Ni/ro's Frankenstein from the 1994 film (my personal fave!), but where Dr. Goodsir actually nurtures (and falls for) his creation 😌❤️
thank you for such a fun request!! If anyone would like to request a drawing (or multiple) my asks and DMs are open :))
some polar research station lads
cozy goodcollins evening 😌 can you believe I used to hate drawing backgrounds?? This was so fun 🥰
Like a dream, Sir
Inktober day 1. Dream
Mr. Collins starting as he meant to go on - just having the absolute worst time, all the time
i promised you more collins content didn't i?
Rereading The Terror
Chapter Thirty-One: Goodsir
Big big action happening aboard Erebus in this chapter - Tuunbaq has made it inside and is wreaking bloody havoc on the lower decks. Lord knows the book isn't perfect but to give Simmons his dues, this chapter really is spectacular in descriptions not only of awe-inspiringly horrific violence but the utter hopelessness of the situation in general.
First, hopelessness. Before the main action begins, Goodsir awakes from a nightmare and reflects on his own inability to help his fellow men given his more limited anatomist's knowledge. But he also remembers something of a confession from the late Dr Peddie - that much of the medicines even the "proper" doctors dispensed were mainly purgative placebos - "the more powerful the purgative, the more effective the seamen thought the treatment was... In most cases not involving actual surgery, the body either healed itself or the patient died." Which is...less than reassuring!
Soon enough, Goodsir is summoned to the scene of action alongside Fitzjames, Des Voeux, and Le Vesconte. Fitzjames refers to Des Voeux by his first name (possibly incorrectly, I'm sure I've read something about the real Des Voeux going by 'Fred' rather than 'Charles' as he's referred to here but someone do correct me if I'm wrong). Le Vesconte gets no such familiarity.
Collins is there too and he's demonstrably unhappy about being sent below unarmed with the intention that Le Vesconte and the Marines will head to the weapons stores and arm everyone in due course once they're down there. I mean, fair enough mate!
Another very vivid and atmospheric detail that I think the show would've struggled to capture is just how dark everything is. They've not even really got enough fuel to heat the ship in any kind of meaningful way at this point, let alone to light it so much of this chapter plays out in terrifying darkness and tiny, inadequate circles of lamplight.
Once below, they discover the first casualties very quickly - Mr Gregory who's been disembowelled, and another seamen whose head's stuck in the furnace. This man's mouth catches on the door of the furnace as they pull him out and they inadvertently snap his fucking teeth off which is one of the worst things I've ever read...(but not for long!!)
They try to head above again only to find Tuunbaq's swiped the ladder to smithereens (something about entering a space you can't get back from, perhaps?) and it's then that fire starts to take hold. They've no water to fight it - even the piss buckets are frozen over - so Fitzjames orders a bucket brigade to dump as much snow as possible on the flames instead. Very resourceful, Jamie Fitzjamie!
Le Vesconte and the Marines are firing blindly into the smoke, just like at Carnivale and to equally little effect. Goodsir falls to his knees (he ran into a wooden post in the darkness so the poor bugger's head's already ringing) "remembering how he had told the crew of Terror that scurvy victims could die from the mere sound of a musket shot".
No sooner do the guns fall silent but a man staggers out from the flames and collapses into Goodsir's arms. It's Collins - who's missing half his face and his right arm. (I want Collins to swoon into Goodsir's arms just as much as the next gal but not like this! Not like this!). Extra shout-out to Mr Downing the Quartermaster who hustles an unconscious Collins singlehandedly up a whole goddamn ladder to the sick-bay.
The situation is no less dire once they make it there. Collins' wounds literally steam in the open air though at least they're clean enough that Goodsir's able to sew them up fairly quickly and worry slightly less than usual about the possibility of infection. The claw marks across Collins' chest though are deep enough to expose rib, and his eye cannot be saved or put back in place in his poor smashed-up face. Goodsir literally SNAPS OFF THE BONE SPLINTERS AROUND HIS FUCKING EYE SOCKET (WITH NO ANAESTHESIA WHATSOEVER!) but it's no use.
Eventually, Fitzjames appears again. They don't know if Tuunbaq is still there or not but the fire is contained and the worst appears to be over. It's then that Goodsir remembers seeing another person belowdecks - likely dead but possibly still alive - and he's duty-bound to check which it is. Fitzjames clearly feels duty-bound also and resolves to accompany Goodsir, specifically calling him 'Doctor' for the first time - it's a weary and bittersweet little moment but lovely nonetheless, especially after all the violence and misery. They're so so done in but by god they're still going to do their best! So fuck it, I'm going to quote it more or less in full: "Goodsir had heard the "doctor". Franklin and his commander has almost never called the surgeons that, not even Stanley and Peddie, the chief surgeons. They - and Goodsir - had almost always been the lower "Mister" to Sir John and the aristocratic Fitzjames." "But not this time." ""We have to go down and see," said Goodsir. "I have to go down and see. One or the other might still be alive" "The thing from the ice might be alive and waiting down there as well," Fitzjames said softly. "No one saw or heard it leave." "Goodsir nodded tiredly and lifted his medical bag..." [] ""I'll come with you, Dr Goodsir," said Captain Fitzjames. He held up an extra lamp that Downing had carried in. "Lead on, sir."
Some of my The Terror plushie fellas went to Beechey Island ☺️
Many thanks to Zoe & her mum for the photos
isn't it great they found the passage and made it through without any issues and they just found a mysterious chest full of flower print shirts? incredible
BLORBO TIME!!
i will singlehandedly fill up his tag until everyone realizes what a great character he is if i have to
shirt: [x]
