✨ Suguru's Girl ✨ @oceanmoonwitch - Tumblr Blog

You, a fool, when characters state different or contradictory things about backstory events or how the world works: This is a plot hole!

Me, wise, enlightened: Not so, neophyte. Have you considered all the exhaustive possibilities in which one of these characters simply has no idea what they are talking about, or better yet, is a fucking liar?

andwewerebothgirls

ailendolin

Weta once again blessing us with more Prologue pics.

shamebats

There's some serious penis fuckery going on in the ski jumping world

shamebats

They're calling it penisgate/crotchgate...

shamebats

World sport's anti-doping body has vowed to look into the lurid claims that first surfaced in a German newspaper in January.

Archive link: https://archive.is/dwVgu

shamebats

moose-mousse

Fun, insane, sourced!

This is a fucking beautiful piece of internet right there!

miraculouspaon

GBBO: “A s’more is basically just an Italian merengue sandwiched between two ganache-covered digestives”

Americans:

flange5

in case anyone in wondering, this is Paul Hollywood's idea of a s'more

theequeerstrian

You know what, their absolute inability to grasp Mexican foods makes more sense every day

ennairea

starlightshadowsworld

Nodding my head in support of the Americans despite having no clue what a s’more is.

mankillercalledbunny

Okay, American immigrant to the UK here to explain all the mistakes from Paul Hollywood happening here: there is one fundamentally American ingredient required to make a s'more correctly but which is basically not available anywhere at all in the UK, and that is graham crackers. A plain digestive biscuit close-ish, but still a very different beast.

From Wikipedia: A graham cracker is a sweet flavored cracker made with graham flour.

The next ingredient (which is also extremely traditionally American but slightly more variable) is typically Hershey's chocolate, but you could probably swap this out in the UK with any plain chocolate bar.

Last ingredient is big marshmallows, the kind you do the chubby bunny challenge with, like the size of your thumb and twice as thick.

A proper s'more, the most traditional possible variety, involves to graham cracker squares, two slab segments of Hershey's chocolate, and one to two marshmallows depending on your preference for filling and gooeyness. You put a slab of chocolate on one of the graham cracker squares. Your marshmallows should be toasted, usually over a campfire but if you're doing them at home over a gas stove burner is fine, but the fire part is critical. You can toast them to whatever degree you like, some people like them nice and golden brown but still kind of firm in the middle, me personally? I want that bitch to CATCH ON FIRE, I want it gooey and sticky as hell in the middle, crispy and burnt on the outside. Slap that motherfucker on your graham cracker and chocolate square, top with the other one so your marshmallow and chocolate are sandwiched together by graham cracker on the outside. You do this with your freshly toasted marshmallow because ideally it will be hot enough to start to melt the chocolate so it sticks to the marshmallow and the graham cracker and, combined with the gooey marshmallow, it keeps the whole thing together, and for that reason some people will let them sit for a hot second to let the melting process happen (especially if like me you have chocolate on BOTH graham cracker squares, not just one, because you're a sugar fiend), but if you are a young child you do not have that degree of patience and you eat that shit immediately, unmelted chocolate and all. Consume your summer camp delight like a tiny club sandwich, get gooey sticky marshmallow and chocolate all over your hands, and enjoy.

Important note: this is a kids treat. It is a traditional summer camping trip dessert. It should be something any ten year old with adult supervision and access to the ingredients can make (and make a mess of). They're called s'mores because kids always "want s'more". If you are using a blowtorch, chocolate biscuits, and merengue, you are so far beyond the bounds of s'more-hood that you have thoroughly lost the plot. If you offered Paul Hollywood's concoction to an American child and called it a s'more, they'd tell you flat out that not only is it not a s'more, it looks dumb and you didn't do it right because it's not gooey.

roach-works

the point is the mess. the point is getting to make a food, at age seven, whose two basic food groups are 'sugar' and 'fire'. the other point is that this food item is so crumbly, chaotic, sticky, on fire, and prone to being dropped (outside, in the dark, while you are surrounded by other children who are also sticky and on fire) that your supervisors cannot accurately monitor how many smores you personally have consumed. the point is also that you may get away with a smore that is five blocks of chocolate and two marshmallows if you move fast and let nothing stop you.

if you haven't accidentally yet unrepentantly eaten a chunk of twigs or dirt or a bug that got enmeshed in the creative process around smore number 3st, you are too old to have any legitimate input into what makes a smore.

kedreeva

There's 2 other points that I think are important.

The first is that you don't pull the marshmallow off the roasting stick and somehow put it on the chocolate. Your staging area will look something like this, with the graham crackers and chocolate already set out (though not usually on the fire like this, for us it was always someone's lap or a picnic table or something)

And when your marshmallow has reached appropriate roasting perfection, you use the graham crackers to slide it off the stick.

and ideally, as a CHILD you are using a literal stick. Like you walked around and spent time looking for The Perfect Stick off the ground while the adults set up the fire. It has to be thin enough the marshmallow will fit, sturdy enough that it won't bow, long enough that you won't burn yourself roasting your marshmallow. And preferably doesn't have a lot of bark that's sloughing off, OR so much bar sloughing off you can peel it all back and get to the clean stick under it. If you're smart, you might stick the tip into the fire first to "wash" it/burn off anything that was still lingering, but. well, most kids don't.

When you bite in, the marshmallow and chocolate SHOULD ooze out all over you. If you don't kinda look like this eating it, you've probably done it wrong:

reignpage

In which you have bad luck and always break something around the house. Good thing, your husband, Toji, is skilled with his cock hands ;)

“I broke it again, Toji…I’m sorry, I don’t know what happened!”

“I’ll handle it, doll,” he says, rustling up your hair to show you he’s not mad. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.”

Toji hates when you even suggest calling someone in to fix anything in your home. He scoffs and says things like: “We don’t need a fucking plumber for the shower; I got it,” “their call-out fees are daylight robbery. What are we, some shmucks?”, and “If I see another man in our home, sniffing around, you’re gonna find yourself tied up and with a sore ass.”

So, it’s hardly a surprise to find him lying on his back in the kitchen, head stuffed under the sink you somehow broke that morning, as he fixes the leak himself. Afraid to get his clothes wet and dirty, he’s foregone a shirt — broad chest and shoulders begging to have your nails leaving a mark, rideable abs on display, and a happy trail disappearing under the band of his Calvin Klein boxers with his washed-out jeans riding low.

Just one glance and you’re positively soaked.

When he feels your hands running up and down his body as a greeting, he grunts in surprise. “How was brunch with the girls? Sharon leave her bum ass boyfriend yet?”

You hum, unzipping him to hurriedly free his semi out of the tight confines; he always reacts so quickly to you. “No, but she promises she will soon though.”

Toji snorts, still tinkering and doing absolutely nothing to stop you from rubbing his fat cock to full mast — he’s a firm believer in letting his gorgeous wife use him whenever she wants. A real man’s always ready, he says. Sinking down on his entire, jaw-dropping length is easy when you were sent off to brunch freshly fucked and hadn’t stopped thinking about having more since. “She’s hopeless —ngh fuck, doll, go slow, ‘m doing something here.”

“Sorry Toji…you just looked so good being so helpful. Couldn’t -hah- help myself.”

He bucks his hips up, bulbous cockhead pressing on your g-spot on its way to kiss your cervix. You nearly scream, having to steady yourself on his tense abdomen. “Don’t gotta -mm shit, always so fucking tight- a-apologise. Ever. D’ya hear me, woman? Love your needy fucking pussy. Go on, ride me. Show me how much you missed me.”

“Yes, yes, fuck! Oh god, I’m sorry Toji — ‘m always -hic- breaking things.” No cock has ever made you tear up and drool and cream so disgustingly. Only his. It's fucking magical.

Tools set down, he slides out, intent on watching that lewd expression overtake your face. Toji runs his tongue over his scar, staring right at where you’re obscenely connected to him, nothing short of obsessed with the way your pussy stretches to take him.

Chuckling, he grabs your hips and drags you up and down his cock like you’re nothing more than a squelching pocket pussy and says with a smirk,

“Go ahead and break the whole damn house, ma — your husband’s got it sorted.”

thefreakmeister

hes so hot i dont trust myself to write a caption for this

allthingswhumpyandangsty

owwllly

Gojo's misuse of power

owwllly

waist goats

alex-just-vibing

looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:

dont care

what the actual fuck

dont care

ooh that sounds- what the fuck

unfinished

don't care

the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again

dont care

alamogirl80

Reblogging for the absolute brutal accuracy of this comment

tonycries

Fucking nerdjo with a strap on

Babygirls how do I add this to my New Year's resolutions 🤩🤩

galsan12

animentality

reallyreallyreallytrying

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted