[woodmeat]

Are you alive

Don’t ask me no personal shit like this

[unclefather]

[valtsv]

*on a date* so. um. i don't watch tv. seen anything weird in your dreams lately?

[sewerfight-deactivated20250114]

my friend was testing perfumes out at the store and she sniffed a bottle and anounced "ngl this bitch kind of sucks" The girl at the counter suddenly looked really sad, and my friend was like "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking about you." And the girl looked up and said "No don't worry, I didn't think that, but I just crushed a ladybug with my shoe" We both took a peak over the counter. she'd stepped on a red m&m

[thickness-protection-program]

Tumblr drama vs other social media drama is so funny

Facebook drama: I will not be going to Uncle Todd's dinner tonight because he keeps saying racist stuff ♥️

Twitter drama: I cannot BELIEVE she said a slur 7 years ago. #canceled

TikTok drama: Is Chad Chaddington III ch3ating on Ash-Lindseigh????

Tumblr drama: *unintelligible paragraphs between coochiemonsterfromsesassmestreet and destielsfavoritepony37 (who apparently owns an illegal baby racing company)*

[audhdspacewizard]

[valtsv]

thoughts on tiktok?

[valtsv]

my sincerest apologies to miss ke$ha i have nothing but respect for the party anthem of all time

[fulltimehabibti]

i wanna thank the onion

[vacuously-true]

Hey bro would you do me a platonic solid

[galois-groupie]

Sorry, best I can do is a great icosahedron.

[vacuously-true]

Bro. That's. That's a platonic solid, bro.

[ghastmaskzombie]

does this look platonic to you?

[vacuously-true]

Nah, that shape fucks.

[theinfiknight]

Find me any other website with interactions like these

[foreveriallyzombified]

i have never been more instantly influenced by media than when i was a kid in middle school or maybe freshman of hs and witnessed that scene in adventure time where finn eats a sandwich and drinks a whole glass of milk or orange juice i forget which and immediately takes a nap on the couch while smiling. i remember pausing the tv, going to the kitchen, fixing myself up with that exact setup and then falling asleep. completely drone-like in its execution. i’ve never been hypnotized like that by anything before or since

[foreveriallyzombified]

[moveslikekeithrichards]

its gettin warm in our room & this girl comes in sweatin & goes “im hot as a burger” like it was a saying

[fliesandlilypads]

do not separate the gays

[dal-selfships]

oh to be a bored prince who keeps rejecting marriage proposals due to being secretly in love with the cute gardener boy

[equalitymeanseveryonethesame-de]

oh to be a cute gardener boy who secretely places roses in the prince’s room because he is in love with him

[tiger-in-the-flightdeck]

Oh to be the palace guard who discreetly helps to boost the cute gardener boy up the wall for his secret deliveries in the middle of the night

[a-2-a]

Oh to be the prince’s best friend witnessing the two fools dance around each other while knowing damn well that the two like each other.

[misha-moose-dean-burger-lover]

Oh to be the noble suitor from another royal family who comes to know of their love instantly and plans an entire plan to get them their happy ending

[aliiiiiiice]

oh to be a medieval peasant who knows nothing about the prince’s personal life and who dies of dysentry at age 23

[officialbabymetal]

[sentada]

americans be eating cheesed burger

[belovedgoofball]

Oh boy can't wait to see that .gif of Phoebe from Friends saying "It's Christmas Eve Eve!" like 27 times today

[unfortunately-awake]

[thehottestdesignershades]