Go home go bed

Quietly moving blogs to start doing story centered stuff! Feel free to DM for details; I will leave all but a few particularly easy to link posts lmao. Thank you for the ride

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Okay I’m watching a ‘true-story’ ghost show and this lady is getting an exorcism and the dude performing it was like “but we had a very powerful relic to help us….The Actual Blood of Saint Agnes!” And like…she’s my confirmation patron so I can’t help but be a little defensively skeptical here?? She died, like, during the Roman empire? Like….14 AD? Who….thought to save her blood? How eas it preserved all these years? How did this random guy end up with it? I need answers

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Me, banging on this dude’s door at 3 in the morning: SHOW ME YOUR RECEIPTS

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Okay update: Her skull and bones are on display at a church named after her, but other than that I found no mention of any sacred relics. There WAS a brief mention that at her execution fellow Christians cleaned up her blood with cloth (but like….wouldnt that out them as Christians????) but there’s no mention of that still existing today as an actual relic. How do I get in touch with the ‘a haunting’ showrunners? I need to track down this exorcist and get him to show me a legit chain of custody dating back to 304 AD before I let this drop.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Woman on the show: This demon has been following me my whole life, was influencing my young son to have violent black outs and I was possessed so badly the Communion bread felt like hot lava scorching down my throat. I had to have a long and painful exorcism in which I spoke in tongues, floated off the floor and almost died.

Me: Wow! Yeah, that sounds super real and plausible, I’m very intrigued 

Woman on the show: Luckily, my exorcist had the actual blood of St. Agnes to help him-

Me: Now Hold On There Just One Dang Second 

[deafmic]

i hope this doesn’t sound really weird but i feel really bad for the lady who came up with gender reveal parties. she had a very legitimate reason for throwing herself one–she’d had a few miscarriages, all of them miscarrying before she was able to find out the sex of her baby and due to really wanting to have children she was distraught, so when her pregnancy made it to the milestone of being able to find out her baby’s sex, she was understandably incredibly excited and threw a party to celebrate it. honestly she had every right to do so and was more celebrating the fact that she’d carried her baby to that point rather than celebrating if it was a girl or a boy

and now she’s the inventor of this horrible thing that makes stupid people cause wildfires. all this lady wanted to do was have some cake and celebrate her pregnancy after a few miscarriages. i feel fucking terrible for her. 

[deafmic]

she’s slamming elaborate gender reveal parties with over the top shit like pyrotechnics on facebook which is good bc she obviously doesn’t support the crazy shit these parties have become but i kinda hate that she has to because this very calm party she threw for herself years ago to celebrate passing the points she’d miscarried before has obviously become tainted and a bad memory for her and now she’s labelled as the lady who “started” these parties even though hers was literally like. a cake that you cut into and the color tells you what the baby is. 

[littleleafsandlizards]

I saw an article saying that she has learned more about gender and her kid came out as nonbinary and she feels bad about how the whole thing hurts the trans communities and her official stance is “There are plenty of other reasons to eat cake” and that we should pick a different one Tbh she seems like a really nice person who is just sort of in the crosshairs of a really big thing she didn’t expect

[teslacoils-and-hubris]

Idk what mad scientist needs to hear this today but your googles and lab coat are incredibly flattering and all your expirments will blow away the scientific community who called you a fool

[sanduschism]

me, giggling and twirling my hair around my finger: OMG they shunned you? for like, your dangerous experiments, right? ahaha.... wait, but like, did you use any green potions? Oh, my God you did???? which ones???

[glumshoe]

hey do you guys know about the uncomfortably horny BDSM song cut from Disney’s Aladdin

[argumate]

no but I wanna

[glumshoe]

it’s called “Humiliate The Boy” and it’s just line after line of Jafar making it Weird™️

including the very real lyrics “oh, we’ll emasculate him slowly/all the better to enjoy/how delicious to humiliate the boy”

Disney why

Disney I can’t kinkshame fast enough to keep up with this shit

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

after learning Ursula’s character design was based on a (truly splendid) drag queen, I just sort of got lazy with assuming she would always be the most salacious disney villain. 

but apparently Jafar is a dom with a thing for twinks & humiliation play so what do i know

[glumshoe]

I don’t think I’d call Ursula especially salacious–she makes jokes implying that men only want sex, and she moves like a theatre major at the grocery store with their friends, but I wouldn’t describe her as horny.

I guess Frollo has a whole song about how horny he is, and both Gaston and Jafar also have “marry the heroine but in an evil way” as motives. 

[smokyquartz323]

Ursula is comfortable in her sexuality. Frollo is horny on main but trying to deny it. Gaston and, apparently, Jafar are horny period, with Gaston being mysoginistc and Jafar having a humiliation kink

[virgil-is-a-cutie]

Oh dear

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

ok someone do an alignment chart

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I made an alignment chart because I needed something to occupy my time. no one but frollo is on the “conflicted” bar because no other disney villain is anything but 100% comfortable with their sexuality and that’s that about that. gaston is evilly sexy, not evilly horny, because the only person gaston is horny for is gaston.

also, did we NOT already know jafar was kinky? was the slave girl outfit and hypnokink not a huge giveaway?

[crispydumbass]

I love tumblr coz where else would I read a serious analysis of Disney villains in terms of them being sexy/kinky/horny while listening to a very disturbing kinky Jafar song

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

someone replace “but conflicted” with “but a creep” and add scar and hades

[jerhomi8u]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Blessed be

[ohsalome]

Me, aged 14, reading Tolkien: Hobbits are considered chuldren until they are 30? How funky! Fantasy worldbuilding! This is so different from us humans!

Me, aged 25: Oh i get it now

[thebaconsandwichofregret]

JRR Tolkien looking upon a quad of Oxford post-graduate students: "Children, all of them children."

[neonprotagonist]

my favorite scp ever is scp 1171 and i just discovered them yesterday.

they live in a different dimension and can only communicate through writing on the constantly foggy windows of the house they inhabit. their name is beauremont. and they just. fucking hate humans. it’s so funny. and the best part is that they befriend someone in our dimension who works for the scp, not realizing that they’re human, and so that human is just sorta their roommate now because they’re the only one who doesn’t piss beauremont off. it’s so fucking funny.

[arctic-chameleonus]

My thembro Beauremont got fucking catfished

[neonprotagonist]

it’s been over a week and i still haven’t recovered from this absolutely fucking stellar addition to my post. this is literally so fucking funny.

[a-rich-friendship]

Y'all are sleeping on this one

A Nerf Maverick that was modified by some random dude to make anything it shoots instantly worse.

[neonprotagonist]

i thought it could get funnier than the coke turning into a pepsi but then he shot the fucking dvd of willy wonka and i lost my mind

[eikotheblue]

i love that it’s The Shittiest Nerf Gun, too

[guiildenstern]

unhappy reminder that amphibians are going through a pandemic right now and anything you can do to support conservation efforts would be greatly appreciated by literally everyone in the world

[guiildenstern]

and for those of you who don’t click links here’s a summary of the scale of the issue as of march 28 2019:

basically a pathogen is affecting and killing off amphibians at an alarming rate globally

it’s been spread through trade of frog meat and pets primarily

its already done more damage to biodiversity than cats and rats

the pathogen can affect at least 695 species to varying degrees

90 species either confirmed extinction or assumed extinct in the wild

124 species undergoing a decline of over 90%

501 species in decline which means about 1 in 16 of every species known to science is affected

it has “has damaged global biodiversity more than any other disease ever recorded.” which is fucking terrifying

efforts to curve the effects include urging governments to crack down on the trade of amphibians, protecting their natural habitats, combatting invasive species, and supporting breeding programs

[acavatica]

This is a great podcast episode about this horrific problem.

[the-ghost-of-jason-todd]

i’ve said it once and i’ll say it again.  queer people need to trust other queer people.  

don’t question someone else’s labels.  TRUST that they’ve done that already.  if they ask you for advice, fine, but DO NOT go in swinging.  don’t go up to a straight trans man and ask why he doesn’t identify as a lesbian.  don’t talk to non-binary people and tell them that their identity is a sham if they don’t transition.  don’t ask bi people when they’re going to pick a side.  don’t assume that someone who is ace is just repulsed by their own internalized homophobia.

like just… have respect for your fellow lgbtq+ folks because there are so few of us in an OCEAN of hetero-cisnormativity.  we don’t have to chip away at each other until only the Cardinal Few remain.  there is no reason that we can’t have space for the people who question, the people who change their minds, the people who dip a toe in and pull back out.  i am HERE for those people, just as much as i am HERE for the people who can write a dissertation on their attraction and knew from the moment they were born that they were Hella Gay.  

there is nothing simple about self-discovery and frankly, i’m not here on this earth long enough to scrutinize my fellow marginalized peoples.  there’s no reason to do that shit.  it does not, in fact, hurt queer people to be wholly accepting of any wayward identity.  non-dysphoric?  demi-gray-ace as hell?  don’t care, as long as you’re fighting on my side, because i’m fighting on yours.

inclusivity all the way, yo.

[xaj1]

People never realize the amount of damage they cause to others.

[everythingfox]

Perfect spot

(via)

[meanplastic]

[g8memes4-u]

[og-athrodite]

Me: when u do this it bothers me can you like fuckin stop already Them: Yeah imma take a rain check on that chief yknow some shit happened i just don’t feel like not being self serving atm k thx ( :

[tahthetrickster]

Attention non-artists who commission artists: don’t fuckin do this???

[cursedcharley]

Actually had someone do this to me too. Was doing a art stream, it took me over 2 hours to do his inked commission, he got a refund cause ‘it took too long’ that he figured I wasn’t going to do it after I gave him the file.

Don’t do this. Do not.

[littlegreendorito]

I’ve had this happen to me with a $350 comic :/ I had already finished it, it was full color, 6 panels and had a full bg in every panel. I was lucky in that I didn’t spend him money yet, but it left me without funds. I’ve also had the above happen to me as well.

Don’t do this shit to artists. We’re people too. Drawing for you is more than a hobby. It’s a job.

[aroyalmoon-deactivated20211014]

Use Paypal Invoices. 

I cannot stress this enough. That shit helps A LOT when it comes down to Paypal refunds/disputes. There’s a description box that let’s you put in what the product is/how long it’ll take/yadda yadda, and then there’s another little memo box that only you and paypal can see where you can say it’s a digital commission and doesn’t require shipping (So Donald Mcfuck can’t say that they never got their commission). And there’s also a box for your Terms & Conditions where you can say, if you have any conflicts/want a refund - email me, or you can actually tell the user that this is a digital commission and they won’t be getting a hard copy of it.

ARTISTS. PLEASE USE PAYPAL INVOICES. it will SAVE you. And to: the people who do this to artists – Fuck you. It’s okay if you change your mind and want a refund. But freaking TALK to us and let us know what’s going on. Let us WORK with you.

[thelilnan]

ALSO A HUGE TIP: Invoices paid will automatically set up a shipping notice which, if not fulfilled, can land you in SERIOUS hot water with PayPal. Since a lot of artists don’t print and ship the commissions, this is a huge problem.

However! Totally manageable. Just go to your PayPal, scroll down to find Seller Preferences

>> Shipping Preferences

>> Display Ship Button. Make sure all the boxes are unchecked. Then you’re all set!

[captain-spicypants-deactivated2]

As a big supporter of artists, don’t you ever fucking dare fuck over an artist like that. Like don’t. And if they take their time to do a good job, don’t shit all over them for it! Don’t be a fucking ass hole. Just don’t. These people put a  LOT of work and time and effort into their artwork. Just don’t be that guy. Often times these artists aren’t even getting what they deserve in compensation. 

[happykittyshop]

I am very grateful my customers have been good to me, but I’m spreading the word.

[guzma-reader-hell]

Very important!

[theakaning]

As a new artist, I’m very grateful for this post. Never knew this. Thank you.

[bisexuanal]

You can really tell who’s never experienced poverty and food insecurity when it comes to discussions around food costs and how unhealthy food is cheaper. Some fucker always comes in with the price of like… lettuce or… apples. And it’s like yeah bitch but can you work an 11 hour shift after eating some salad and an apple!?! Find me something cheaper, and more filling than the broke ass staples of boxed mac and cheese, hot dogs, noodles, bread, beans, and rice. I’ll wait.

It also ignores the mental toll that poverty takes like maybe your home made veggie filled recipe isn’t crazy expensive but it also involves prep time and cooking time and organization in terms of fresh food that a lotta poor people can’t manage.

Not to mention if you can only afford to get to the store once every couple weeks via bus or cab then you can’t keep fresh veg on deck.

But ya know.. poor people are just dumb and lazy.

[comicsareforkids]

Fourth in a series I of comics about protesting safety tips I made with @this.is.ysabel . This one is about the dangers of police surveillance and how to avoid it if possible. Keep being safe when you go out. Don’t get snatched!

[whatareyoureallyafraidof]

See a pattern?

[danielle-mertina]

This is really an issue of class. Public schools are reopening because the government wants the parents of low income kids to continue working and risking their lives doing “essential jobs.”

Meanwhile schools that primarily serve upper middle class and wealthy kids will not physically reopen. Plus, parents with the time, money and ability to homeschool their children or switch them to private will not be sending their kids to school in the fall.

Schools reopening is pretty much exclusively an attack on low income kids and their families. And the teachers and staff who serve them.