Freecucumber67✌️

Lera|20|♍|She/her I write posts and comments with a translator, sorry for possible mistakes. С вилкой в глазу и шилом в жопе

[bitter---wing]

i was born weird and i will die fucking weird

[teapatime]

Hi again !

[rinpin]

Modern AU Bagginshield

Figured I might actually put up the rough story idea for this one:

Bilbo and Thorin got together at a local bar. Bilbo was in grad school and Thorin just a struggling musician who’s family fell from fame after his father’s wasted all the money on drugs and booze. Over the course of their relationship, Thorin puts together a band with his closest family members and soon they begin to skyrocket to stardom. But as the fame comes rolling in for Thorin, so does the pressure to party, and the booze and drugs follow. One night, before a big show, Thorin is drunk and drugged up, falling into a heavy argument with Bilbo. It leads to Thorin physically assaulting Bilbo, and Bilbo leaves, leaving the Durin to wallow in his drunken misery.

Fastforward five years later, Thorin is sober thanks to his family stepping in. He’s still a famous musician, but that fame means nothing when his heart is hollow. Bilbo is now a college professor teaching writing and poetry, but is struggling to get over an abusive relationship. A chance meeting at the same local bar brings the two back together, and Thorin is determined to make up for his past mistakes to his hobbit, no matter the obstacles.

Might consider writing this, might not— depends if I have the time. We’ll see. ;)

[ogurch66]

When Thorin saw another dwarf making advances toward Bilbo:

— ...And so, that’s why he’s completely unsuitable as a partner for you—do you understand, Bilbo?!

— Oh really? And who *is* suitable? You?

— Yes! I mean. No. I mean—

[shannon1517]

Fili faun(?)

[sobtymurr]

got it

[ogurch66]

Thorin and Bofur approached Bilbo and asked him to decide whom he wanted to date. Bilbo, thoroughly annoyed since he had other things to attend to, yk, said he would date both of them if they just left him alone right now, as he had a lot of work to do. The next day, the two of them approached Bilbo again and announced that they had agreed to date him together.

[thememedaddy]

[endlace]

You if bugs didn't exist

[m0nk3y-bl0g]

[ogurch66]

Who will win:

Bilbo, who no longer believes in love after a few failed relationships, or Thorin, who fell in love with Bilbo at first sight?

[raventhrush]

While I'm still working on the next chapter of FJL I had some days off and my brain came up with a silly servant AU where Bilbo enters the mountain looking for work only to be forced to wear the smallest size women's uniform as there was nothing else in his size. He got the job because he proved he could be very silent, and the Crown Prince doesn't like getting disturbed while he's writing his emo cringe harp music. The crown prince is known for going through servant after servant, but maybe Bilbo will do better.

Thorin is a bit of a nerdy shut-in in this AU and Bilbo is not at all impressed at his terrible attempts to make conversation. Thorin not realizing he's actually a man (because no beard and he hasn't met Hobbit's before) treats him like he would treat a lady that he would like to impress, while both in the bg experiencing a internal crisis as he was sure he only exclusively was into 1) men and only Dwarrow before. Yet now there is this cute Hobbit lass walking around in his quarters and he really doesn't know what to do with himself.

Bilbo tried to tell him he was not actually a lass, but no one listened and now he just runs for it as it's really not at all that bad to be a women inside a Dwarven Mountain. It's fun actually to see the grass from the other side. And over time Bilbo gets more confident in both his masculine self and the fact that he now for a while wears dresses.

Also Thorin keeps calling him my fair lady and that's just very amusing to Bilbo. Thorin is a terrible flirt and despite Bilbo not minding the attention. They're both really really aware of their difference in class and that's the real problem here.

T: *Attempts to make conversation*👉👈 B: oh man, this guy really needs to TOUCH SOME GRASS, he has like NO game.😆

so Bilbo takes him out of the mountain. And Thorin having never met Hobbits before is like just like. Ah this must be what Hobbit ladies are like. Meanwhile Bilbo is still very much displaying masculine behavior. even tho he's a lad. 😜

Anyway it's all just an excuse to draw bilbo in a bunch of different cute servant-esque dresses. Let this bird self indulge once in a while, ok?

[toki-like-eat-kfc]

A Short Story of Racial Courtship Differences.

Since English is not my first language, I used an AI translation tool. Please let me know if there’s anything that needs correcting.

[ogurch66]

We all love AUs where Bilbo owns a café, a flower shop, or a bookstore, but what if we imagine him working... as an accountant? Just a regular, goddamn accountant who hates everyone around him for coming up with questions like "Why is my paycheck smaller than last month's?", is chronically sleep-deprived, and gets home at 8 PM? Imagine Thorin’s horror when Bilbo comes home late at night with red, puffy eyes and goes straight to bed, and Thorin thinks, "I’d almost prefer it if it were drugs".

[toki-like-eat-kfc]

"This stupid dwarf! Every day he makes me put on different jewelry and wear all kinds of outfits—I'm not his doll!"

Bilbo got so upset that he stormed off by himself.

[ogurch66]

Modern au where Thorin is supposed to inherit a criminal gang, but he falls madly in love with Bilbo, and Bilbo does not want to be with him while he is connected with crime, and no persuasion from Thorin can change Bilbo's mind (Thorin even cried). Therefore, after very long and difficult reflections, he decided to get rid of his criminal past and start a new life with Bilbo

[plantitart972]

Bilbo sat on a newly built balcony in Erebor, fiddling with the chainmail Thorin had given him, thinking about the tasks he would be helping with that day.

Balin entered, intending to ask Bilbo something, until he noticed what he was wearing.

"What are you wearing, Bilbo?" Balin asked, his face showing surprise.

"This? No, no, it's nothing. It's just the chainmail Thorin gave me," Bilbo replied, confused as to what Balin found so odd.

"Oh no, Bilbo, you shouldn't be wearing that."

"What? Why not? Is there a problem?"

"I wouldn't call it a problem. It might lead some people to get the wrong idea about your relationship."

"What are you talking about, Balin?" “Well, it’s pretty obvious you don’t know about this, so I’ll explain. In dwarven culture, it’s traditional to propose by giving a piece of fine armor.”

“Marriage??” Bilbo thought, his ears turning red. “Thorin proposed to me??”

“And normally, the most polite way to refuse is to not accept the gift or not wear the armor. I’m not saying you have to give it back—that could be even worse—I’m just asking that you don’t wear it for a long time. Although, the best thing to do if you don’t want to keep it is to sell it for parts, though that would be a real shame,” Balin concluded.

“Marriage?” Bilbo repeated.

“Huh?” Balin raised an eyebrow at the question.

“Thorin, me, marriage?!” Bilbo started to get a little flustered.

“Are you trying to ask if Thorin proposed to you?” Balin made a small grimace.

"Thorin proposed to me during the dragon sickness?"

Balin looked down and sighed. They were silent for a few moments, then he continued, "Yes, I suppose so." Balin grimaced and put his hand to his face before going on, "I should make him apologize. Just because you didn't know what it meant doesn't excuse him putting that pressure on you. Don't worry, it was probably just the dragon sickness."

Bilbo blinked twice and then looked down. Of course, Thorin would never want to be with him if he were in his right mind. Why would he? Bilbo was just a hobbit from the Shire who had the misfortune/good fortune of meeting Gandalf. Bilbo wasn't anyone extraordinary. "Oh, yes, yes, I understand what you're saying."

"What's wrong, lad? Why so down all of a sudden?" “—” said Balin, confused.

“—No, no, it’s nothing, I just—” Bilbo didn’t know what else to say as he clutched the clothes at his sides.

“—Bilbo?” Balin approached and patted Bilbo on the shoulder.

“—It’s just that, knowing that the only way he’ll want to be with me is because of an illness and not because he chooses to…” He looked away, his voice trailing off.

“—You’re saying… It doesn’t bother you that Thorin tried to propose to you?” Balin asked incredulously.

Bilbo stared intently into Balin’s eyes; a small glimmer of determination flickered in them.

“—Why would he?” The truth is, I would accept if he really wanted to. Don't look at me like that. I know it's a silly idea and that he would never be with just anyone...

"Bilbo," said Balin, placing both hands on Bilbo's shoulders, "if Thorin asked you that in the next few days, would you accept? Despite everything?" he asked incredulously.

Bilbo swallowed hard and stared into his eyes, a small glimmer of hope flickering in them. "Yes, the truth is, yes," Bilbo said, a slight blush rising to his cheeks.

"By Mahal," he murmured softly as he stepped back.

"Bali?" I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't complain about these things and— Bilbo looked down again—it's just that I…

“Bilbo, please, don't worry, go to your room and rest and take a bath.” Balin started to leave the room, stopped in the doorway, and turned to look at Bilbo with a chuckle. “And wear your coat, and please, when you go out…” Balin quickly left the room, leaving Bilbo stunned.

——————

Writing things again when I'm two minutes from falling asleep; at least this time it wasn't in the middle of the night. I hope whoever reads this enjoyed it. English isn't my first language, so I wrote this in Spanish and put it through a translator to convert it to English. And honestly, I didn't proofread it, so if there are any nonsensical sentences, I don't plan on correcting them anytime soon sooo...

I promise to continue this

[ibupro-atyappin]

Thorin trusting Bilbo before his own kin, confiding in him, reserving a soft smile only for Bilbo, giving him the mithril..

oh my man was in LOVE.

[mvinsworld]

If I see one more person drawing/writing Baggienshield with Bilbo looking like a 20yo twink and Thorin like a 60yo bear, I'm actually going to lose it. Bilbo is the complete opposite of a twink he's a grumpy middle-aged man, while Thorin is one of those golden retriever boyfriend and he 100% obeys Bilbo's every whim.