The Astrological Signs as Michael Jackson Songs
As of late, I’ve been immersing myself into the world of astrology (S/O to @itsjustdesire); I find myself being deeply fascinated by it. Not only has astrology helped me better grasp an understanding of my complex behavior and personality quirks, but it’s also given me more insight on why people do the things they do. And, if you couldn’t already tell from my previous posts, I’m a rabid Michael Jackson enthusiast. So I decided to take something I’ve seen on Twitter quite often and put my own nerdtastic spin on it—assign each zodiac sign an MJ song and explain why I feel the song is representative of the signs. Sonically, lyrically, thematically, or all of the above. Hope you enjoy! And if you don’t particularly care for the tune that your sign was assigned, my apologies in advance.
Aries - Now, for the Ram of the zodiac, I chose “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’.” Aries are known for their bold, assertive, energetic nature, and what better Mike Jack song encompasses those characteristics better than WBSS? Its fun, fiery, fast-paced feel pairs perfectly with the Ram. Also, the lyrics to “Startin’ Somethin’” have a defensiveness to them, which is also known as a common Aries trait.
Taurus - Finding the perfect mate for the Bull was a tad bit tough for me, but I think I found a suitor that I’m sure all you Taureans will appreciate—”Human Nature.” My reason for choosing “Human Nature” to rep for Taurus is because of the sign’s groundedness and placidity. There’s no tune in Mike’s catalog that’s as tranquil and soothing as “Human Nature.” And its chorus, “Why? Why? Tell ‘em that it’s human nature.” You can’t get any more down-to-earth, grounded, and realistic than that.
Gemini - Alright, Twins. So for you guys, I picked “History.” Geminis are known for duality and deep complexity; they oftentimes get a bad rap for being “two-faced.” But that’s not always a bad thing, and the title track of the “HIStory” album displays that. Alternating between a rough-edged, stabby, funky, motivational groove and a smooth, idealistic lilt, “History” is like two songs in one. Although “History” is one of Mike’s most slept on tracks, it’s also one of his most creative and engaging. While Geminis are anything but under-discussed, they’re definitely one of the most creative, brilliant, and magnetic signs of the zodiac.
Cancer - So I chose “Cry” for the Crabs. If you know a little something about Cancers, you’re well aware of their highly sensitive, touchy disposition. A lot of people would even call them crybabies. (Hence, my song choice for them.) But aside from their hypersensitivity, Cancers can be deeply compassionate and altruistic. “Cry” is all about what Cancers stand for—deep desire to make positive change, lending aid to good causes, and just plain ol’ benevolence.
Leo - And now we’ve arrived to the regal ones of the zodiac, les Leos. This sign is primarily known for being braggadocious, confident, and open, so selecting a song for the Lions (”Bad”) was an easy task. Leos are about rising up to the occasion, showing and proving to themselves and to the world around them just how capable and badass they are. “Bad” has a bouncy, upbeat, warm instrumental—all things stereotypically Lion(ness). You go, Leo.
Virgo - Ah, yes, the analytical, anal workaholics of the zodiac. Anyone wanna take a wild guess as to which song I picked for the Virgins? If your guess is “Workin’ Day and Night,” two ‘hee hees’ and an air kick for you. Virgos are extremely hard-working, almost to a fault. They’re very detail-oriented and appreciate tasks that require great intricacy, which is also why I feel WDAN best represents Virgos. “Workin’ Day and Night” does not receive enough love in the Mike fandom for how incredibly elaborate the instrumental is. And to me, the same can be said for Virgos—who I feel do not get their due props.
Libra - If you happen to be reading this post and you’re not a hardcore Michael Jackson fan, you might not be familiar with this jam. Libras, whose symbol is the Scales, are very elegant, smooth, refined individuals. The original demo for “P.Y.T.” encapsulates all those attributes. Libras are also known for their beauty, good taste, and affinity for the finer things in life. And despite its relaxed groove, the “P.Y.T.” demo has a subtly luxurious vibe.
Scorpio - As for our Scorpions, well, it was a toss up between two songs: “Dangerous” and “Who is It.” Now, both of these songs are well-representative of common Scorpio traits—dark, intense, and passionate. Buuuutttt, I’m leaning more towards “Who is it” because of the tune’s mysteriousness and its theme of betrayal and deception. Also, because people tend to berate Scorpios for their supposed “need for emotional drama.” So if you’re a Scorp and you wholeheartedly rebuke the stereotypes placed upon you, gon’ head and opt for “Dangerous.” It fits you just as well.
Sagittarius - Choosing a tune for the Archers of the crew was pretty tough as well. But after a bit of pondering, I’m going with “Off the Wall” as the Sag theme song. As we all know, “Off the Wall” is about letting your hair down and freeing your mind, body, and spirit from life’s daily stressors. Sagittarians are characteristically fun, optimistic, outgoing, and free-spirited. When down, they don’t stay down. They boogie!
Capricorn - Ok, to be perfectly honest, I’m still not certain of which song I feel best epitomizes the Goats. So I’m just gonna throw a dart at my MJ album collection. And whaddaya know? It landed on “Man in the Mirror.” Caps are, at most times, best described as grounded, ambitious, conservative, and wise creatures. “Man in the Mirror” relays the message that it takes self-awareness, work, and drive to make the world at large a better place. And I think the vast majorities of Capricorns would deeply identify with this philosophy.
Aquarius - “Stranger in Moscow” is the cut that I chose for our resident Water Bearers because of how deep, multi-faceted, and artistic they are. They also have a tendency to isolate themselves from others and are labelled as cold and distant. But that aloofness is not without rhyme or reason. Aquas are pretty eccentric and, though they take great pride in their individuality, can sometimes feel lonely and misunderstood. They seldom show it, but Aquarians are emotional people who have an immense need to make a difference. To me, Aquas are quiet storms—much like “Stranger in Moscow” is quietly intense.
Pisces - And last, but certainly not least, we have our Fish—the dreamy, creative, quiet, gentle souls of the zodiac. “Fly Away” is pretty much Pisces-in-a-jar. Listening to “Fly Away,” you can easy space out and get whisked away into a dreamland where you and the object of your desire leave the callous world behind and float to the cosmos together. Idealistic and romantic, Pisces would want nothing more than to just…fly away.
Alright, folks, so that’s it! What’d you think? Do you think my choices were pretty accurate? If not, which songs would you have chosen? Oh, and what’s your sign? I’d appreciate any feedback.
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