the complex ritual of trying to put on ripped jeans without shoving your entire leg through the hole in the knee
will byers stan first human second
KIROKAZE
Claire Keane

#extradirty
Peter Solarz
No title available
cherry valley forever

No title available
tumblr dot com
dirt enthusiast

@theartofmadeline
sheepfilms

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
almost home
Cosimo Galluzzi
styofa doing anything
art blog(derogatory)
ojovivo
h
seen from Brazil
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Algeria
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Chile

seen from Canada
seen from United States
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seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
@ohthatgingerchick
the complex ritual of trying to put on ripped jeans without shoving your entire leg through the hole in the knee
Choose your path
my sister-in-law, who has no kids and does not spend time around children ever, decided she wanted to take my kids on an “outing” yesterday. (she sees them like 4 times a year usually). she took them to some weird historical u.s. military fort museum thing, it’s like a big compound with like 15 buildings enclosed by a fence. anyway my 5-yr-old saw one of those red metal fire alarm boxes on the wall and asked his aunt “what does that say?”
now the correct answer to this question, in my opinion, would be “that is a fire alarm. we only touch fire alarms if there is a fire. if there is a fire, you would pull the handle and it would make a very loud noise so that other people know to get out of the building.”
according to several reliable sources, my sister-in-law’s answer to the question was, “it says ‘pull.’”
so anyway that’s how they managed to evacuate all 15 buildings at the museum and why this is probably their last “outing” for a while.
Things my dentist has actually said to me:
“Well, either the x-rays lied to me or you are spontaneously creating teeth. I’m going with the second one because it’s way cooler.”
“When was the last time you flossed? Your gums aren’t bleeding which means I’m either not doing this hard enough or you actually floss your teeth regularly”
“You don’t need to do a fluoride treatment I just want to go check my facebook for a second and this is the best excuse I can come up with. Don’t worry your insurance will cover it.”
“Take a whole handful of toothbrushes, I can’t order new ones in less ugly colors until these ones are gone.”
“Remember not to eat or drink anything for a half hour…or actually you know forget that go eat lemons and drink coffee right now. I make money based on peoples bad decisions, you should probably stop brushing your teeth too.”
“I became a dentist because I like making children cry and they don’t let you do that as a regular doctor.”
Chaotic neutral dentist?
Adulthood™
New emoji combo:
😙👌
Its like a chef kissing their fingers after they make good spaghetti
BIG MOOD
oh my lord this pleases me
Incoming college freshmen: you might think u can do an 8am, you might even think u can do a 9am. But the truth is, u can’t even do an 11am.
lemonade is the best beverage in the world
🍋people from europe/australia who think sprite is lemonade DO NOT interact 🍋
spotted this graffiti in an outhouse in canada
The Evolution of Douchebag Style [full video]
Oh, he’s good.
I don’t know whether he deserves an Oscar or a restraining order.
I die laughing at this every god damn time. The prayer hands are so fucking funny
“does anyone else-” yes
“am i the only one who-” no
“is it weird that i-” probably not
My roommates cat was sleeping on my head.