ỌŁẒ̌ƁƐƘ @olysr - Tumblr Blog

Funny Idea

The boys getting baby fever and since Yuu is a monster the chances of conception have increased significantly..

Now she gotta hide, along with Jester..

(No nsfw just funny hide n seek)

OOOOOHHHH!!! Me likey this idea.>:) Warnings for lots of innuendos, spicy times implied, rampid baby fever, Harlequin IS his own warning, cannibalism, murder, yandere/obsessive vibes from the boys towards Columbina and Yuu, etc.

Alternate Title: Many mistakes were made-

Monster Yuu Concept Here: (This is only MY take on monster reader, please don't throw hands over this.)

💬 0 🔁 2 ❤️ 27 · Monster Yuu/Y/n Au Facts · A non-cannon side au to OUAW I thought of! EDIT: This is only MY interpretation of Monster Yuu/

It was already weird enough.

It all started that one night. She had been with Harlequin one minute crossing the dark street, talking about whatever her bashed brain had long since forgotten about. She only remember looking up with a squeal of tires, her vision went white as headlights loomed over her, and then everything went black.

From what she was told when she woke up, both herself and Harlequin had been hit by a drunk driver. However other than a few permanent scars, the monster had managed to practically walk away from the hit and run fully healed after a moment. A human with a squishy body though? It was absolute chaos when Harlequin had shown up limping badly and gushing enough blood to be a fire hydrante clutching a battered barely living human. She wasn't even awake anymore. According to Doctor, it was practically hopeless and they should probably start preparing a special box for her bones when he got the idea.

Monsters healed up generally quick. Yuu was one third monster. If he could tap into that, then theoretically she should live. It's not like they had many options anyways. So he injected her with who knows what to-

"Just give anything dormant a wake up call. It shouldn't harm her, it's the same has drinking an energy drink or getting a punch of caffiene."

Well THAT was a lie! Because when Yuu woke up she was NOT the same anymore. It was a surprise to everyone really. It was just supposed to heal her! Not turn her into a voluptuous Jessica Rabbit monster knock off with a rat tail!! Pierrot had to hold Yuu back from lunging at Doctor when he called it the greatest achievement he's accomplished!

"A human into a monster! This could solve the global issue at hand-" He ducked when a glass bottle was launched at him with great speeds.

"CHANGE ME BACK, BIRDBRAIN!!"

"Of course! All I have to do is reverse the process."

"Then do it!"

He paused awkwardly. "....I do not know how to do that yet."

"You mean...I'm stuck like this forever!?" She clutched her cute tiny horns.

"Not necessarily. The dose I gave you was supposed to only be temporary. So theoretically it should wear off after some time."

"How long will it take?" He didn't know. "What am I supposed to do? I can't go out like this."

"I agree you can't." Jester lit up in unsuspecting glee as if long last something he wanted was coming true. "It looks like those discussions of you joining us are finally settled now."

"What!?"

"Just temporary!," Columbina clarified to get her to not freak out again. "It's just until it wears off or Doctor fixes everything. There's nothing to worry about. I promise."

Tell that to future her! Because suddenly she was constantly having to practice walking on hooves instead of normal feet like a baby again, Jester was helping her with her flexibility so she at least could still do gymnastics and ballet, and they had her bunked with Columbina out of sight. She waited. And waited. And waited more. One day turned into a week. Week into month and one day she woke up only to have Jester pull her aside for a 'serious talk'.

"You're coming with us for the forseeable future."

"What? You can't be serious."

"We can't leave you behind like this. So with us it is. Don't worry. There's plenty of things to keep you busy."

Easy for him to say! This new body was so difficult to manage. Her appetite got bigger, it took forever to walk properly again let alone dance, and she hated the stares she got now. The others weren't too happy about it either and Jester decided she should follow Columbina's example. Stay hidden from the public unless she was with one of the others. Sigh. On the bright side, the outfits and clothes they helped to custom built her were beautiful. The long veil and mask needed some getting used to but it was nice to at least still have her most beloved hobbies.

"We can't call you Yuu in public anymore. No doubt they're considering you a missing person by now and might look for you here. From now on in public refer to yourself as 'Ballerina'. It's just for safety."

"*sigh* I know."

It's been months now. Maybe a year since last end of Spring and now she was mostly used to things around here.

Or she THOUGHT she did.

It started out small, and it wasn't even towards her. It was between Pierrot and Columbina. The three of them were exploring the new town, after all it was still winter and there was LOTS of discounted delicious christmas candy and hot chocolate to be had which Yuu had bugged Bil for a small allowance for-

"Hot chocolate and candy? Ridiculous-"

"I'll cuddle with you tonight. You can even sleep on top of me again.~"

".....You may have thirty dollars but no more than that."

So there she was, checking out some discounted candy canes when Pierrot looked up in his disguise towards some high pitched squealing, and found a gay couple with their loudly squealing baby cutely wrapped up for the cold. He pointed towards them suddenly and looked at Columbina.

"Wouldn't it be nice to have that?," he whispered, "A tiny you and me. If they had your pink eyes, we could nickname them 'strawberry'."

Yuu rose a brow as Columbina only smiled and patted his arm. "Yes. It would be. Now come on. Let's finish purchasing your flour and new mixer. Alright?"

Yuu didn't pay much attention to it at the time. Probably just a one off comment about Pierrot wishfully daydreaming a what if scenario. However as winter started coming to an end and slowly Spring approached, more and more things started happening. Cuddling with Harlequin one night. Shocker that the biggest pervert loved to cuddle with her and use her now small sized watermelon chest as a pillow. However he was acting rather unusual tonight. Usually the green goblin was making innuendo jokes or just burying his face into her chest without a second thought (probably dreaming h0rny dreams about her new HOPEFULLY temporary body). But that night he was oddly silent. Just laying there silently with his arms around her and his multiple tentacles wrapped around her arms gently. Usually he never acted this way unless he was either 1. Really upset about something or 2. just really tired.

"You alright? You haven't made one joke about my chest or hips all night."

"...Have you ever wondered?"

Her head looked up to look down at him. He was just laying there looking up at her. "Wondered...what?"

"What it would be like to leave a piece of you behind?"

A piece of him? What was he talking about? "You mean like-...bones? Or the impression you leave on people?" She wracked her brain for any logical explanation. "I didn't think monsters did graves."

".....Nevermind." He turned and faceplanted into her chest without a second word.

That was weird but by the next morning he was back to his cheerful self. Ok. Last night was probably just him tiredly thinking about some important scenarios for the future. Everyone thought about what would happen once they passed away at least once in their lives. Although he did make ONE joke that seemed to stick to everyone around them once he made it in front of everyone-

"How do I look in the new romantic tutu?" (A romantic tutu is a soft, flowing, bell-shaped ballet skirt made from multiple layers of tulle or tarlatan. They typically fall anywhere between the knee and the ankle.) It was a longer tutu custom made by Columbina with some help from Jester so it'd be easier to hide her long tail wrapped around her waist.

"You look so pretty, Yuu! It fits your figure perfectly."

"Yeah. It shows off your perfect child bearing hips and your chest that can feed an army.~"

She frowned at him. "Would it kill you to give one normal compliment for once?"

His look was so..strange. She couldn't put her finger on it. "I'm not wrong."

Whatever it was, that stupid joke seemed to flip a switch for everyone. Suddenly Doctor wanted to give her a physical a couple days later. Great! Maybe he was finally making some progress. But it was extremely weird. Well..Weirder than what Doc usually did. This time there was no blood samples taken or checking for any signs of regressing back to human. Instead he used measuring tape to measure around her chest, and then her hips. Humming and then asking some really weird questions.

"Have you been having a normal menstral cycle?"

"...Yes?"

"Still right on scheduale every month?"

"....Yes."

"Are you still being intamately active with any males?"

"You know dam well the answer to that." She crossed her arms. "What's with all the weird questions?"

"I am a doctor. When taking someone's health into account, it also includes intimate health." Alright. She guessed that was fair, and a normal topic a doctor would ask. "...Did you know it's rare for a human and monster to have children as it is?"

"I've been told. I'm 'a rare case' in your words who could probably never have children because I'm an unnatural mix of monster and human. Remember?"

He nodded but held up a finger. "Yes! However since awakening your monster DNA strands and changing your body, there's a greater chance you may actually conceive!"

She stared at him. "...Are you saying I could get pregnant now?"

He shrugged. "I'm not sure, but I believe so! However you still have human blood so there's a chance not."

"Oh...Well thanks for the heads up."

His hands held up the measuring tape again. "Can you perform a split? I wish to measure how far your legs spread in case of a bir-"

"NO."

THAT was weird! No way she could brush that off as normal, but maybe Doctor was just actually giving her a heads up in his own way and exploring a different curiosity about her body again. She just took it that she had better be more careful from now on. The 'child bearing hips' and 'chest could feed an army' jokes from Harlequin still continued though much to her annoyance. She suddenly found Pierrot reading a book titled 'How To Make Home Made Baby Food For Beginners' one day while walking into the kitchen for a snack. He stared at her in an intense pupil dilated look the entire time she made a sandwich before leaving. Doctor hadn't asked her anymore weird questions since that physical going back to acting normal, but found out later he did the same thing to Columbina whom looked unbothered by the boys' weird behavior.

"Don't you think that's weird?"

"For Doctor?" She shook her head putting a flier under someone's windshield wiper. "Nope. He does this every time around this time of year."

"Oh. So this is like a yearly physical thing?"

"In a way."

Ticket Taker and Jester were more subtle about it but they too were NOT immune to this weird ass behavior. They were just more reserved about it. However she caught the blue top hat wearing man staring at her hips every so often. Not too strange, until she realized wasn't her hips he was staring at but her stomach.

"Is there something on my dress, Honey?" He hummed seeming to snap out of his stupor with a blink. She pointed at her dress. "You keep staring at my waistline. Is there something wrong with the dress?"

"Ah!" He held up a hand. "No. No. Nothing like that. I was just thinking perhaps..We may need to one day adjust it is all."

"Why? What's wrong with it?"

"Nothing. But one day we may have to...let it out more in the middle, to allow room for a bigger stomach."

"....Did you just call me fat?"

That was a very awkward two minutes to stand through as he stuttered and attempted to save face because that's not what he meant.

"Then what DID you mean?"

He paused red faced under that mask before tilting his hat over his face mumbling about suddenly needing to collect inventory as he quickly walked away. What the hell was that about!? She wasn't free from Jester either. Unlike the others he didn't say anything weird but he had gotten WAY closer lately. Standing a few more feet closer than normal, intensely leering in those eyes, lingering more as she walked past him or spoke, a brush of a hand more a few times during performances. Until about a month of this he finally opened his mouth while she was doing stretches particularly an arabesque also known as a leg hold with one leg completely stretched up into the air as she balanced on her other leg.

"You seem to be doing that quite well."

She turned her head finding him literally a foot away behind her. The hell? She didn't even hear those bells. "I should hope so. Spent years with aching muscles just to be able to do it." After two minutes, her leg was put down only to lift the other one up in a leg hold. "Come to do stretches too?"

He didn't say anything for a moment just tilting his head at her in that new intense way he had been doing for the past month ever since Harlequin first made that stupid joke at her expense. "...Are you familiar with Commedia Dell'Arte?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah. Bil told me a lot about them. It's a theater play from sixteenth century Italy if I remember right."

"It's a highly physical, improvisational style of theater actually. But you were correct about everything else." His head tilted with a loud jingling from those bells. "Do you remember the names of the characters?"

"A few. Brigehella. Pantalone. Zanni I think?" Her leg was put down so she could look at him easier. "Why? Are you or Harlequin thinking about doing some of that theater? I think that'd be a really neat new act to try ou-" She paused when he held up a piece of paper between them.

He just smiled calmly and ran his eyes over the list. "Isabella, Pierrette, La Ruffiana, La Signora, Columbine- Slightly different from Columbina. Rosaura, Moretta, Innamorata- I personally enjoy that one the most. Flaminia, Silvia, and many more." He held out the paper to her and she slowly took it. "Pick any one you wish. I highlighted my favorites names if it's mine."

She took it and felt her eyes pop out at the long list of girl names from the play. A couple of them were crossed over in yellow sharpy like Innamorata. Her brows rose as she glanced down the list before turning to Jester. These were the parts he wanted her to play??

"Columbina already has a copy of it. Everyone approved about ten names of their own chosen. A separate one for the males will be decided shortly."

"Names?" Not 'parts'?

"You know I always prefer to plan ahead. Allow me to help you stretch out for tonight's performance. Wouldn't want you to strain yourself during this time."

Ok. Something weird was DEFINITELY going on. So she went to the one monster who'd probably give her a straight answer.

"Why is everyone acting so weird around here?" Columbina paused in sewing up a hole in the side of Pierrot's red tent. Apparently another fight between the two broke out when Harlequin got bored and just tripped Pierrot up sending him face planting into the ground, this time the two had torn a large hole in the tent Jester wasn't happy about. "They've all been acting really weird, well weirder than usual. And you act like it's no big deal!"

She shrugged. "It's really not. Spring is almost here. They always act like this during Spring." She went back to the needle. "Don't worry about it. They get baby fever a few months until Summer hits, Doctor gives me some contraceptive, and then once Summer rolls around they've already got it out of their systems-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hang on a minute there!" She grabbed the girl's arm making her stop again and look at a paling Yuu. "Did you just say they have 'baby fever'!?"

She nodded raising a brow confused. "Yes. Male monsters usually have their mating seasons during Spring. It's perfectly normal. They just got the instinct to-..." She slowly stopped taking in Yuu's pale face. "Wait. You didn't know?"

"NO ONE'S TOLD ME MONSTERS HAVE A MATING SEASON!! I THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST AN ANIMAL THING!!"

"I thought someone already told you..You know what? It's fine." She reassured her. "It's fine. You'll be fine. They'll just be extra clingy and possessive and uh-....'excited' during this time. You just gotta go with the flow and play along with their instincts for a few weeks. They're always really embarrassed and shy when they can think clearly again. You'll see."

"You mean to tell me I'm going to have FIVE h0rny monsters at my heels because they want to make babies?? For a few WEEKS!?"

"It's just until around the end of March."

"THAT'S THREE WHOLE MONTHS, COLUMBINA!!"

"I've had to do it for over a century by myself. You can survive three little months. I'll even help you. Everything will be fine. You'll see."

It. Was. NOT. Fine!!

Now that Yuu knew exactly WHAT was causing their weird behaviors, she was highly aware of just how much leering both herself and Columbina were getting. How much they seemed to be getting closer and closer every day. How closely they seemed to be sitting down during dinner now. The sudden increase in meal sizes the girls were getting-

"Wow. Uh-...A whole rotisserie chicken." She won't lie. The rotisserie chicken DID look and smell so GOOD with lemon and potatoes and carrots on the sides. But a glance around showed her (other than Columbina the other female-) no one else had this big of a meal to themselves. "Thanks, Pierrot. But wouldn't it be a lot more polite to share this with everyone else?"

He shook his head sliding the whole pan towards her. "I made it especially for you, My Lady.~ Your body needs nutrients."

"Pierrot, I know I'm a lot bigger with a bigger appetite now but this chicken can feed both me and Bil if you cut it in half."

"Maybe you will eat enough for two soon! Or three! Maybe more!" He looked at her stomach in a way that made her nervous.

It didn't stop there. One time she was bringing Harlequin some specific props he wanted to use for a play, but when she arrived there Harlequin was. Top completely off and large green tentacles spread out like an octopus.

"Well, Hello.~"

"Here's your props." She bluntly put them down before rushing out of there quickly before he could try and grab her with those things. Another time Ticket Taker asked her to take Jester some tea as he was busy counting up the money from that night. "Jester?" She pushed the door open with her free hand, teacup in the other. "I got you something to drink-..." She paused.

The man was sitting down at his desk as usual, humming a tune, and reading through a local newspaper. A raspberry tart scented candle was lit on the desk beside him. Perfectly normal....So why tf was his hat missing? His hat with those bells were gone reveal four very large horns from his head.

"Oh, Yuu. There you are. I can smell the rose tea." He beckoned her forth. "Do come in." She slowly approached minding her steps. "I heard you were helping Bil with the boring paperwork today. Now was it?"

You mean other than the smaller monster oogling her chest half the time? "It's ok. I severely under estimated how much you guys organize everyday." The tea cup was set in front of him. "He asked me to bring this to you."

He only still stared at her that that large grin.

"Soo...Where's your hat?"

"Being cleaned. We do need to clean our uniforms every so often you know."

"...But you're wearing the rest of your costume."

"Oh this is next. I'm just keeping track of the missing persons reports first." He tiled his head down an angle to almost point the horns at her but looked like he was looking at the newspaper again. Ok. Weird.

"Ok. I better go back and help Bil before he complains about me taking too long-"

It wasn't just those two whom acted weird too. Other than Pierrot's insistence on making bigger meals for the two women, Ticket Taker was acting oddly...Nicer. More lenient. And gentlemanly. Insisting he take her out and offering an arm, tipping his hat to her (he hadn't done that since she was just a visitor to the circus-), opening up tent flaps for her, The compliments-

"You both look extremely radiant today.~"

Columbina had giggled him off. "Aw. Thank you, Bil."

He stared at Yuu. "Are you using a new perfume?"

"Yes. It's the one you gave me."

That was apparently the WRONG thing to say before he only smiled intensely. "An excellent choice.~ It makes you smell-...perfect."

Not to mention Doctor. He actually didn't act any differently except for the occasional weird question, except for one thing. Whenever Columbina or Yuu was in close proximity, he always made in a point to be suddenly carrying something heavy, sticking his chest out, and one time he 'flexed' an arm while pretending to just lift something to his face.

"Why are they all acting so weird all of a sudden?"

"They're trying to impress us. Like I said, it's all perfectly natural and they'll be super embarrassed about it once it's all over." She hummed in the middle of taping up a flier in a dark alley one night. Yuu made the choice of tagging along not wanting to be alone with 5 monster men who suddenly decided they wanted baby monsters. "Let me guess. Jester showed you his horns?"

"Yeah actually. It's super weird to just see him without his hat when he's not taking a bath or changing."

"Mm hm. Thought so. He's very proud because his horns are the biggest. And Harlequin displayed his tentacles I bet."

"He did. So they're like-....h0rny peacocks?"

A loud snort of laughter left her and she had to cover her mouth before someone heard them. "I swear you say the funniest things sometimes. But yes. In a way. Like I said, they're just trying to impress us. Just go with the flow and everything should be fine. All you have to do is NOT show interest and they usually don't push."

Considering the monsters' way of consent and courting were different than humans, then it was probably best to follow Columbina'a advice since she's had to deal with this nonsense for literally more than a hundred years by this point. Well...Maybe she should've been more careful but she didn't think just doing every day things would get her to this point! How was she supposed to know that Pierrot and Harlequin was watching her eat a popcicle until she turned around and found them staring at her popcicle still in her mouth!?

"What? I danced for five hours straight today. I'm hot."

"Yes, you are.~"

"Can it, Green Apple!"

How the hell was she supposed to know just doing a good deed would activate some kind of deep rooted instinct in them? She had heard random sniffling from behind a tent and lot and behold had found two largely bundled up children. Monster children.

"Oh. Hi, Sweeties. Did you get lost?" Being a (still hopefully temporary-) monster herself made them both trust her enough to nod. They were pretty small even by monster standards so they must've been pretty young still. "Are you hungry? How about we get you a snack?"

"I don't understand! They were right next to me and then when I turned around- I only had my back to them for three seconds!"

"Not to worry. We already have all the exits blocked." Jester assured the crying bundled up young couple in front of him. They probably just started their family less than a decade ago. Still inexperienced. A pity. "If they're still here, they'll be found."

"That's right. They probably just got distracted by the games or rides as children do. We'll find them."

"Excuse me." Four heads perked up. "Are these your kids?"

There she was. Masked and veiled ballerina, with two itty bitty kids in her arms. One on her hip drinking a cup of hot chocolate and a second one just laid back in her arms perfectly cradled, red candy apple clutched in one hand and a bunny plush with Xs for eyes in the other. Instantly the couple was on her grabbing at the children and pulling them into their arms.

"Be sure to keep a better eye on them, and you two don't wonder away from Mommy and Daddy again. Ok?" She turned waving off the couple before finding both men staring at her. "...What?"

"...You seemed to handle them down well."

"It's not hard. Give them a little snack and a toy, be gentle when you talk to them- Just gotta make them feel safe. I used to babysit kids a lot for money back in highschool."

"So you're experienced with children?"

She gave them a look. Uh oh- "No. Not really. I only watched them occasionally for a few hours at a time every once and a while."

"Interesting."

How was she supposed to know going to Doctor after eating a bad hot hamburger from a small burger place would get him all giddy when she walked in holding her stomach and groaning?

"Doctor, do you have any pain relievers or something for stomach aches? I feel like I'm gonna be sick."

"Ah! Excellent!" He was on her immediately grabbing her face and pulling her eyelids up to examine her pupils. "You came just at the right time! How long has the pain been happening?"

"Since last night."

"Tell me who you've been with! It's Harlequin's isn't it?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Your pregnancy of course."

A glass breaking sound went off in her head. "IM NOT PREGNANT!!" He stopped looking at her. "I ate a bad burger last night and I'm having stomach cramps. I just wanted a pain killer!"

He stared a long five seconds. "Oh." He sounded genuinely sad as he slowly let go. "I see. I have something for that for whenever Harlequin cooks food for someone. But I still want to give you an examination for the off chance it's not a burger."

"...You'll not going to let me have the medicine unless I let you aren't you?" He silently stared as she sighed. "Fine. But please don't make it weird."

It seemed their behaviors were getting a whole lot worse no matter what mundane thing she did! It was getting worse anyways!

"Columbina! Pierrot is reading how to make baby food and Bil's 'hypothetically' looking over the budget in case of any 'new surprise residents'!"

"It's not that bad-"

"Doctor wouldn't give me Pepto unless I let him see if I was pregnant or not yesterday!" Yuu cut her off. "I don't know how much more of this I can take!"

She hummed. "...I know what you need!" She lit up brighter than a Christmas tree. "You need a night to yourself. I've been saving up all my money for the last seven months! Let's both go out shopping tonight and we can have a girls night in my tent!"

"...I don't know."

"What you need is to distress. It'll be fun. We can get snacks, and do each other's nails and try on some new clothes!"

It sounded more like a middle schooler's slumber party, but she had a point. Maybe what she needed was some time away from the guys. So they left that night to 'go put up night fliers' but secretly disguised themselves up and went shopping. Honestly it was fun late night shopping with Columbina oogling at some cute jewelry and pretty clothes neither could probably fit into, and stopping by a cute bakery and trying some cute looking cakes. She was right. A day out without five monsters leering over either of them was JUST what she needed. No one seemed to even notice them both sneaking back into the circus and towards the pink tent to unbox all their new goodies.

"Look what I got you.~" She smirked evilly and slid over a box. "It's what you humans call a gag gift."

She opened it...and found #1 Mom mug. "....The fuck, Columbina?"

She snorted. "Oh come on. It's just a joke."

"A mean gift." She pushed the box back towards her. "You've hung around Harlequin too much."

"Fair enough. Oh! We should play truth or dare now! That's how these things go right?"

Not usually but she wasn't going to ruin probably her first sleep over with another woman before. So she nodded. "Sure. I'll go first. Truth or dare?"

"Truth!"

She smirked. "Is it true you accidentally called Jester Mommy in front of guests before?"

Instantly the female monster paused...before her grey skin lit up a bright pink and she pouted. "Hey! That's not fair! Harlequin promised not to tell anyone that!"

"C'mon. Ya gotta say yes. That's the rules of the game."

"....Fine. But it only happened ONCE." She crossed her arms. "Hmph. Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

The two went back and forth with 'truth' for at least ten rounds before Columbina stopped them. "Ok. We both can't keep picking truth. One of us has to do a dare."

"Ok. But I'm only doing one if YOU agree to do one too! And neither of us backs down."

"Agreed. Let's raise the stakes up since it's the last round." She pointed at Yuu with a smirk. "We have to pick something extreme and we can't back down no matter what it is!"

"Oh it's on!" She glanced back to the mug with a smirk. Time to get revenge. "Columbina, I dare YOU to walk up to Harlequin's tent and yell 'Harlequin, I want to be the world's 'number one mom'!' like the mug you gave me. In Portuguese. And you have to sound like you're flirting with him."

Her jaw dropped shocked. "What!? You do realize what that'll do to him after-"

"Are you chicken?" She crossed her arms smugly. "I thought you said we couldn't back down, unless you want to call it quits."

She scowled. "Fine. I'll go do it." She pointed at her with narrowed eyes. "But I dare YOU to let me dress you up in whatever I want and however I want tomorrow!" She smiled evilly. "And then you have to yell, 'I'm ready to start a family with whoever catches me first!' in the middle of the circus!"

"What!? Why that? I'll be chased by all five!"

"Oh. Are you chicken? Unless you want to call it quits, Yuu."

"MMMM!! Fine. But you're doing yours first! Right now."

She stood right up. "Fine! I'll be getting my revenge very soon anyways."

With that she marched right out of her pink tent and Yuu followed her but stopped, hiding behind one of the other tents to watch. Columbina slowed down her walking until she was in front of the green tent and stared up at it. She looked back at Yuu who gave a shoo motion. Was she going to chicken out? Slowly the monster in pink sucked in a breath turned around to face her demise. The green tent was completely silent, the lights were off, and not a sound came from inside. With any luck Harlequin was out somewhere or so deep asleep he wouldn't hear her.

She cleared her throat before she giggled that cute giggle of hers. "Hehehehe. Oh.~.. Arlequim.~" She sweetly beckoned just loud enough for Yuu to hear, in a sultry voice. To prove she wasn't backing down. Clasping her hands against her head cutely. "Quero ser a mãe número um do mundo!~"

Then they waited in the silence. No one moved. Not a sound was heard except a piece of paper the wind blew past her. Nothing happened...Columbina released a sigh of relief before turning around-

FWAP!!

Curtains opened.

She froze. Yuu DUCKED. As a tall figure suddenly stood there, multiple limbs whipping around him as a long shadow fell over Columbina. A cross between a deep growl and purr sound went off behind the sweating monster. There was a loud squeal from Columbina, Yuu slowly peeked back around Bil's tent, and only saw the movement of the green and black stripped curtain swaying back into place. Then nothing. Everything went silent once again as the night went on. The only trace Columbina had been there at all was the now still curtain that was swaying-....Yuu slowly turned and began walking back to the pink tent before Harlequin could come sniffing after her next.

Columbina did not come back that night. Harlequin's act was closed all day yesterday. Columbina still hadn't come back all day and she was starting to get worried so she asked Bil about it.

"Hey. I had to take care of the pink tent by myself today. Is Columbina ok?"

He sighed annoyed. "She's with Doctor getting some pain reliever and an ice pack or two. She'll be fine. She just needs some rest."

She did come back that night. Looking like she hadn't slept in a week, looking like a tornado just hit her, and with a couple patches here and there over her skin that looked like bite marks or scratches. She glared at Yuu.

"What the fuck did he do to you?"

"Tried to get me pregnant! That's what!" She walked with a slight limp over to her vanity, grabbing the chair and yanking it out before staring at her and pointing at the chair. "You! Sit. It's YOUR turn!"

Columbina was NOT joking. She was dead serious the entire time she styled up her hair and did her make up making her look 'enticing' in her words. That was until she wobble limped to her wardrobe and pulled out something red and pretty and lacy and with cute ribbons in just the right places, and stockings, and-

"....I am NOT putting on that nightgown! Or the stockings!"

"I spent nineteen hours with Harlequin during mating season because I wasn't a coward." She thrusted the pretty red nightgown at her. "You are putting it on!"

"Why do you even have this?...In my size?"

"It was for a rainy day or special occasion. Like tonight."

A few minutes later Yuu gently poked her head out of the tent in worry. The entire circus was quiet and dark and silent...

"I look like I'm being paid to do a lingerie photoshoot instead of doing a dare! Was the red lipstick necessary?"

"It matches the outfit. Now get out there!"

"Do I have to?" She shut up when the monster glared at her with enough venom to make a diamond combust.

"I can't feel my hips! Still! Because you decided that was a reasonable punishment. For. A. Joke cup!"

Yuu opened her mouth...before shutting up. Yeah. She had no excuse for that one. She still fiddled with the edge of the tent until Columbina shoved her out the door with a glare and a firm hand pointing! Yuu felt her ears go back before gulping thickly and slowly stepping further. One. Then another. And another. It must've taken her at least twenty minutes to even reach the middle of the circus. Silent. Alone. Dark. She gave one last glance to the glaring monster as if she would magically have a change of heart. Nope! She still scowled deeply and pointed!

So there Yuu was. Standing there in a sexy red nightgown. Custom stockings Columbina must've custom sewn to fit her hooves. A red ribbon tied in a pretty bow around her neck.

And questioning every life decision that lead to this!!

"I am never playing truth or dare again!" She glanced back once at the glaring limping woman before sucking in a breath and PRAYING to whatever gods monsters worshipped everyone was either out or asleep to not hear her yelling. "I-I'm ready to start a fa-family with whoever catches me first!"

Then her eyes slammed shut wincing as her voice seemed to echo out beyond the tent and probably into the random town they were in. She stood there wincing for a few seconds...Before slowly opening her eyes, and looking around. No one. Nothing. Nothing changed. After a few more seconds she released a sigh of relief.

"Uh...Yuu!"

She turned to the other woman. Columbina pointed. Yuu turned. Yuu froze when a large shadow of glowing green eyes stood there, dark octopus like limbs twisting around.

"Well...Look at you." The sounds of footsteps approached. "I knew you both would come around sooner or later.~ You even got all dolled up. Just for me.~"

OOOOOHHHH NO.

Harlequin was already a h0rndog outside of this mating season bullshit. A Harlequin who was in a 'need to start a family' mode and had already spent the day prior spending NINETEEN HOURS already trying to make that dream a reality with Columbina!?...This was not good.

She gulped holding up her hands. "Harlequin! I-...Uh-....This is all a BIG misunderstanding-"

"Come here, Darling.~" A clawed finger made a come here motion. "I'm going to show you worlds beyond your wildest-"

SLAM!!

Something BIG and RED slammed into Harlequin and the two began to tear into each other sounding like giant rabbid dogs fighting over meat.

"Well now." She jumped and whirled around to Bil calmly standing there watching the two fighting a few yards away. "Now what has gotten into them?" She couldn't answer. He looked at her. "Now why would a respectable young lady be dressed like that out here?" Slowly he reached out to unbotton his blue overcoat and took it off, holding it up to her. "Here...This should help."

"Oh thank you-..." She paused in taking it. "Wait."

"YUU!!" Again Columbina pointed behind her. "RUN!!"

She snapped around. Found red and purple eyes staring at her from the dark. Harlequin and Pierrot separated, hissed at each other one more time, before also staring at her-

F U C K ! ! !

She turned, lept OVER Bil, and RAN faster than a paper doll with their ass lit on fire. Behind her not one, not two, but FIVE large figures gave chase as she screamed. Columbina lost sight of her when she ran threw Bil's tent. She didn't return that night. And since Columbina was forbidden to go out in crowds during the day, she couldn't go and check around for her. She had to wait until it was night time again. However it was strange, during the day Bil had come to check on her bringing her a slice of strawberry shortcake and tea.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. I'm used to Harlequin's claws by now."

"Doctor will be by later to check over your wounds," He still had that intense gaze hesitating before asking. "Have you seen Yuu anywhere per chance?"

She paused mid bite. Blinked. "No? I thought she was with one of you."

"No one's seen her since she managed to toss Jester off her. ...If you should see her please let ME know before anyone else."

"Oh. Alright then....Why?"

"Volto."

"Huh?"

"Oh nothing. I've just been thinking...How nice would it be if there was another one with truly remarkable and gentlemanly genetics.~ Volto is a fine name. Nicolina is a refined name for a young lady of the arts like her mother."

Oh. He still had baby fever. "Oh. Those are...lovely names, Bil."

She still couldn't understand it. Doctor checked up on her a few hours later asking the same thing, but she had no idea where the woman went. Maybe she decided to just leave them and go all the way back to her home town. She hoped not. Finally once the crowds left she stepped out in search of the missing woman.And she wasn't the only one. They were all out scoping for the missing monster. She checked the first few places, all the tents, under the food vendors, inside game booths, hiding inside any of the vehicles or giant prop crates calling her name but everything turned up empty-

Someone's hand slying gliding on her shoulder. "Later Pierrot. We should focus on finding Yuu first."

The white haired man whined like a kicked puppy denied but nodded. It got to the point a few of them had left to look in the town for the night. She resigned herself to the pink tent for the night. That was until she smelt a familiar scent. Yuu? She exited the bedroom and went into the larger area of the pink tent. Looking around the darkened empty area not seeing anyone.

"...Yuu?"

"SHUSH!!"

She instantly looked up and found a certain woman clinging to the long main pole holding up the tent and long wire leading from one place to another. Dangling partially like a sock monkey. "Yuu! What are you doing up there?"

"Be quiet before one of them hears you!" She hissed back. "I am staying up here until this build-a-bear family fantasy nightmare is over with!"

Columbina sighed in relief. "I'm just glad you're alright."

"Alright!? I was chased by five monsters who want to make me a mother and nearly cornered me and I'm hanging off this like a spider monkey! I. Am. NOT. Coming. Down."

"It's not that-....*sigh* We'll find a way around this. Doctor usually gives me contraceptives-"

"He didn't give me any contraceptives whenever he examined me! He kept saying how 'pretty any chicks we had would be' and how Jester already has a nursery planned for his tent since it's the safest place-"

Columbina blinked. "Wait. What?....Actually, he never gave me any this year either."

A tense silence followed as the two women stood there in the silence.

"Di-Did you say Jester has a nursery in his tent?"

Yuu was silent for a moment. "Is that bad?"

".....Yuu. Move over." She slowly grabbed onto the beam about to climb up. "I think I'll hide with you for a while."

"Ugh. Fuck. Me."

"What do you think we've been trying to do all this time!?"

Both looked over horrified and found FIVE figures standing there. All with strained smiles and ..other things. Jester's eye twitched.

"A little game of truth and dare? Hm?"

Columbina and Yuu didn't say anything, but the pink monster DID try to rapidly climb before she was snatched off the pole with a squeal by Pierrot.

"PIERROT!?"

"I-I'm sorry....You said later. P-Please!"

Yuu gripped that trapeze rope for dear life..However Doctor only walked over calmly, lifted one arm, and gave the pole the rope was attached too a good WACK. The vibrations traveled up, he held out his arms, a loud squeal came from above, and a second later Yuu crash landed into said Doctor's arms.

"....Uuuuh. Hiya, Doc."

"Greetings! I believe it is time for recreational activities now."

Slowly both girls looked at one another.

"...This is the LAST time we EVER play truth or dare!"

"Agreed."

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