The Great Secret

Boobies. I'm John O'Mallen, party hardy, follow for psychedelic bullshit and psychic phone sex because I'll blow your mind. Jk. That entire statement is misogynist and ridiculous and you're all my friends. Love, me.

[omallen-blog]

Parents kicked me out in the middle of spring break and haven't spoken to me since.

[guy]

yeah baby i am an ANIMAL in bed. more specifically a koala. i can sleep for 22 hours a day

[discolor3d]

The person I reblogged this from deserves to be happy.

[klefable]

[manual]

Your body is 65% water and I’m thirsty

[manual]

Your body is 65% water and I’m thirsty

[mollythemachine]

My two friends are watching an episode of Supernatural. One friend asked: “Why is it so dark in this episode? It’s daytime” and my other friend said “Maybe it’s from Dean’s point of view. There’s no light in the closet.”

[omallen-blog]

It's my birthday motherfucker I'm a grown ass man

[pruningthisbranch-deactivated20]

how does one’s eyebrows and eyeliner slay so hard

AT THE SAME TIME

[omallen-blog]

I've been violently ill for three days now and after passing out and busting my chin open finally made it to th hospital. To stop the dizziness they gave me valium and some meds to get from the pharmacy. While on Valium my blood work came back with weed in my system, much to the distaste of my parents, and I proceed to slam them with the knowledge that if they feel weed is the deciding factor of our relationship then they're petty and ridiculous. Also told them I plan on going to the mental health facility because they never got my appointment because of their nonsense; and I have no plans on going to college only because I have more immanent plans on killing myself. They think I'm making things up to get out of trouble for smoking dope. Oh, and I'm so sick I've quite literally been passing out, but that's only a sidenote in the whole Grande scheme (sarcasm).

[heartswillrecover]

pussy on We Heart It.

[freeingeileen-blog]

[recoveryisbeautiful]

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!!

[hopeinrecovery]

YES OMG YES

[gigis-playroom]

This is good for so many issues.

[naughtypixies]

LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!

[littlesassyblue-deactivated2014]

I’d like this as a poster

[numblrd-deactivated20180708]

[mistersailor-deactivated2014042]

favorite

[pleatedjeans]

[iraffiruse]

Satisfying things

[zahdimir-deactivated20150218]

Source

[sugistripes]

What gay men give to the world.  A-yup.

[madmadamemolly-deactivated20141]

On the second one.

There’s this one gay club I go to that actually has a problem of straight guys going there to dance with girls.  I guess these guys don’t understand that girls can also be gay, because they assume that any girls at the club are there with their gay guy friends.

So one night I was out on the dance floor, and I see this guy.  He’s like over six-foot, at least, all beefed-up, muscle shirt, looks kindof like a douchebag.  And he’s just circling the dance floor, in one continuous loop, looking at the crowd like a predator, and it’s creeping me the fuck out.

It’s creeping me out enough that I don’t immediately realize what’s going on nearby.  Some girl has attracted one of the Assholes, who has proceeded to begin grinding on her.  She’s pushing him away, telling him to get lost.  He’s pulling that whole, “come on, don’t be a bitch” spiel, and generally just not getting the message.

BAM.  Suddenly, the prowling guy swoops in, like some sort of Gay Avenger.  He shoves himself between the girl and the Asshole, grabs the Asshole by the hips, and starts dirty dancing him like a God-damned fuck machine.  Asshole completely flips his shit, like how DARE another man try to dance with him at a GAY BAR???, starts spitting curses, and tears ass off the dance floor and out onto the sidewalk.

The Gay Avenger turns back to the girl, inclines his head in an, “are you okay?” sort of gesture.  She nods, and he returns to his previous position of circling the dance floor, looking for his next target.

Told this story to some guys upstairs.  Apparently Gay Avenger is a regular there.

[forcefemme-vigilante]

someone write a comic book about Gay Avenger.

[aleyma]

[l4r5]

Posy ring with pictogram inscription, ‘Two hands, one heart, Till death us part.’ Made in England in the 17th century (source).

I love this